Where have all the fit, interesting and available men gone (part 24)

[Remotew]

Hello!

lou you and dp's partnership is Premier Division
OK I mean in a non date context
how do you know if someone likes you? objectively - any clues

Lou, on the one hand I you, on the other you are an example of how good it can be, life after relationship breakdown etc

Ninah, no idea, been so long for me since I was out there....

today I am an example of someone whose motivation has evaporated - loads of stuff crashing round my ears at work but the energy and efforts of the past few weeks have taken it out of me an today, I just don't really care

I do want a snog though.....

ffs

it was that description elasta put in about trip in fast car with snog at the end that got me going, that and Matt Damon the other evening in bourne identity

hello all...monty sorry I missed you was thinking you had been quiet - hope all ok; whats this about joining up again?

ninah - festival sounds like it was great (I've wanted to go to one - any one really - for years but my tent phobia puts me off!)and holiday man all sounds positive to me, but the whole how do you know if they like you is one I'm struggling with myself, as evidenced by the ongoing saga of wedding man above....think we may need some more info on holiday man to decide his intentions

in the meantime do you think wedding man pulling a load of weeds up from my garden (which now looks much tidier!) and changing all my blown lightbulbs unasked while he was at mine (to do other, unrelated, work) is at all significant? or am i simply clutching at straws?

sponge, omg, significant for sure

god, hate, I dunno! it's so difficult isn't it? are they just being nice or what
Normally I would just ask but have learned to act be patient around this kind of thing
HM. Nice conversation, bit of eye contact, kept feeling the vibes. Bit of a wasted night out which seemed v amusing at time but both suffered next day. Did not ask for my number. I gave him a hug goodbye which was reciprocated and he said see you soon. My ds noticed that and was delighted as he really took to him. Think it was just a festival crush shocked at my own susceptibility tbh.

ninah, no harm in being susceptible, maybe he was holding back due to ds? Does he have dcs? Do you have a way of keeping in contact?

questions, questions

I am trying not to build up Thursday night out after work too much as it may be a big old anti-climax....mental note to self must note drink too much too quickly on empty stomach and say/do something inappropriate with work colleague witnesses......

Hi all,

God I hate this post date contact thing as I never know what is the right thing to do.

With sailor both dates have ended in us agreeing to meet again and I expect I will probably see him next time the kids are away in a couple of weeks.

We have been swapping daily texts, mostly chatty and flirty but I never know if I should leave him to it not to seem desperate, or just get on the phone and chat to him as I would any other friend. (or at least any other friend I want to snog )

Am planning to leave it a day or two and see what he does next, but it is killing me - what do you think ladies?

yes he has dc, he was v lovely with mine in a genuine, non forced way
I don't often meet someone that interests me, and I can't think of anything I'd like to do more on my child free week than have a drink and a chat and see how we get on. I am easy to find through friends if the urge takes him.
big carbs before you go out mily
Thurs I find out my gcse result. Have interview for childcare course next week. Teacher training on a back burner for now ...

elasta your situation is diff as it's clearly a date scenario and he quite obv fancies the pants off you
I'd feel free to contact him when you like
as for the initial phone call rule my research suggests the usual time frame is 3 days but allow up to 8 if you are truly desperate enamoured

If we are premier division does that make me a WAG?

elasta- i agree with ninah, you know he fancies you, and is keen to see you again, so i think you are fine to contact him whenever feels right for you :)

ninah - I wouldn't write it off simply because he didnt ask for your number, possibly he would have felt awkward doing so, or didnt want to put you on the spot, or maybe was thinking he would be more organic about it and get in touch via friends....any chance of those friends arranging drinks in the near future which you could both be at, or would that feel too staged? sounds as though you both got on well, and the fact he gets on with your dc is always a good sign. positive thoughts! (and good luck with the results for thurs, will keep my fingers crossed on both counts!)

mily - i'd like to think its significant but not sure...the idea he might like me seems a bit like one of those things which is too good to be true re your night out, i think the main thing is to enjoy some time out with other adults, let your hair down a bit and generally have fun...and don't forget to have a big lunch beforehand :)

yup too good to be true is what I feel myself hate
he was so nice, he didn't get irritated when I kept getting lost ...
trouble with friends setting it up is that it would be more of same, nice evening but still wondering
If he likes me I'll hear. Or not. There, sorted! god I am boring myself now lol
lou you are the manager, surely

ninah but what if he needs a few evenings first to work up to making his move? :) you're not boring me - i am however bored with myself and therefore am going off to text wedding man as has been 3 days since I last heard from him

lol at lou being the manager :)

ooh I do hope so
lovesick mooning emoticon
the reality is we both have complicated busy lives and fairly traumatic relationship histories. Even given liking and attraction, it could well be a non starter for those reasons. I think he is a careful, thoughtful kind of person. As I am. Mostly.
Yes, contact WM. Flush the bggr out. Why can't it be simple?!

lou, are you arsene or fabio?

ninah, fwiw i think you have nothing to lose by making a move to contact him - he may be sitting htere thinking'if she likes me I'll hear, if not, i won't' and that will be that. No one is too good to be true, we are all fab and deserve the best (I have been reading old threads and am now eveangelist for the phrase 'you are the buyer not the seller' ). 2 instances in RL that I know of where lovely people with traumatic/painful realtionship backgrounds got together and were very honest from the start, no games etc and in both cases are now happily married. Not that I am saying that is what you want ninah (or elasta for that matter) but to me that approach sounds a lot less stressful

hark at me...do as I say, not as I do, since I spent yesterday eve making jam and listening tot he archers in an attempt not to be miffed that neither Green Man bloke nor Surrey bloke responded to my replies to their emails....

will make a note to carbo load thurs

Ninah do you have a name for him??

Hi everyone.

Al is 'offsides' atm. Won't go into the minutia.

wedding man is not well. the urge to offer to be his nurse is v hard to resist

monty - :( re al, hope you are ok.

Hi all,

Thanks for the advice. Will give him a day or so and see if he contacts me. Am out with my work team tonight so will try to put down my mobile and stay away from it for at least an evening

Ninah - good luck with the GCSE reults

Perhaps we all need to just grow a bit more back bone and go after what we want - at least we might put ourselves out of our misery - this is supposed to be fun

Holiday Man. Bit more info now. Split year ago but ex round every am and pm, not as a partner, but still operate as family unit. She is v attractive. Wants to stay nearby when they sell up to continue arrangement. He is not so sure.
Never simple is it
Red card or yellow card monty?

Ninah - ooo, that's not so good. I'm not sure how that would operate in terms of him meeting someone
Al has had yellow cards on several occasions, he needs to raise his game on certain issues or the red will be raised. The wedding we're supposed to be going to next week is a bit of a pain, not sure what's going to happen about that.
Fingers crossed for tomorrow!
Sponge - I'm vexed!
I think you should offer wedding man some succour. Lou has a nursey outfit you could borrow.

monty - lou is tiny! I doubt I would even fit my arm in her nursey outfit, let alone rest of me

he is ok really, not in need of a nurse, more to be less of a total pessimist. he's v grumpy sometimes most of the time albeit in an amusing way....well it amuses me for now at least :)

Crikey is that wedding next week! it seemed ages away when you were shopping
Go and enjoy
men, eh!
No, HM obv isn't ready to meet anyone, given that set up. Friend suggested I contact him as friends only, but I have to readjust my head first. Feel such an idiot! Would you get in touch? bearing in mind we had a good time ... or just leave it ...

argh, ninah, tough call. The set up is pants

depends if you could contact him with friendship in mind or if you'd really be thinking rip his clothes off with your teeth a lot more than just friends

how local to you is he?

Monty

Sponge grumpy/amusing good, grumpy/pathetic/brings you down not good

Elasta, enjoy night out, eat carbs - or is that me just passing your own advice right back to you have left my brain in bed today I think

and still haven't tracked down my motivation

so why didn't the hyphens work then?

maybe i could be a manager, i am managing to eat the hugest portion of cream sponge cake as we speak

not so tiny after this methinks

i am comfort eating

after spending 170 quid on food and back to school stuff today i bloody well need it