Son living in London

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Can anyone put my mind at rest please...my 24 year old son has moved to East London for a graduate job and i am terrified he will come to harm...he grew up in Norfolk so not used to gangs..stabbings etc...he lives near Whitechapel/Limehouse area.

OP I am a five feet tall tiny woman. I have never been stabbed or witnessed any stabbings. Granted that I live in suburban London but as a student I lived in Camden..I walk home from the tube really late at night too..

DH grew up in London and when we were buying, one of the reasons he cited for wanting to stay in London is that in London, if you scream, someone is more likely to hear you!

Oh, to be 24, working in the City, and living in a house-share in Limehouse

My sons were brought up in London and I had few concerns - I am though worried about my DGS(16) who lives in deepest Somerset as there seems to me to be next to nothing for teens to do!

Please keep things in perspective, OP. You’re being absolutely ridiculous.

I’ve walked straight past gangs in mid altercation (quickly!) and there weren’t interested in me.

Generally speaking, most violent crime is against someone you know. Obviously rare and horrifying exceptions but even in London coming to harm on the streets is rare.

I'm sure you've posted about this before OP. He'll be fine!

You need to think bout your mental health
Not his safety

Not sleeping at all because an adult has moved to a new city, is not reasonable or rational.

My Daughter has lived in one of the roughest parts of Glasgow for two years.
Precisely nothing bad has happened to her.
You are being irrational.

Op you really should get help for your anxiety.
I'm from Canterbury and curious to know what the rough areas are he lived in.... it's one of the safest cities I've lived in!

I think it’s ok the cause of you not being able to sleep, you’re worried about something where you don’t know enough about the circumstances he’s in. My mind does the same, tries to fill in the blanks (except I end up worrying and thinking of worst case scenario).

Basically unless he’s in a gang, gangs don’t really affect you. They must exist but I’ve never seen any and I spend half my time here. The point of gangs is to sell drugs and horribly get schoolkid boys (usually) to act as go-betweens. It’s awful and no one cares, you never see police raid a bar to catch the rather snooty users. So if your son isn’t in a gang (he won’t be) then he’ll be fine. He might need to watch for pickpockets on the tube and maybe standard drunk people - I mean it’s possible but super low risk, will be the same as your area.

Hope that helps! The most important thing is… he enjoys his time here :) think of all the up-sides… making new friends, having fun in his job and maybe meeting a partner. All the great food! Galleries and sports stuff on all the time :)

What YOU can do is make sure he feels super supported. When kids move away some parents are honestly crap - I remember in my first houseshare, one girl’s parents never called (for two years). He didn’t go home for Christmas. They hadn’t had a falling out, they basically said “well you’re an adult now so off you hop”. It was awful, she felt really disconnected from them and it made her question her childhood. Others had parents who moved abroad and left them in the UK, or sold their house and chucked their stuff. Like life in any city can be rough at times and yeah you want to talk to your mum, don’t ever encourage your kids to put on a brave face when you’re already apart.

ALWAYS check in with your kids. Better they tease you for it than they sit there doubting you care. Make sure he knows it’s ok if he wants to leave London and it wasn’t the right move - now or years down the line. You have a massive role in his life, and honestly it seems a low bar but it’s so nice to read how much you care - keep it going!

My ds is at uni in Mile end - he's survived so far

@titchy wtf

Ooh shadwell?! It’s fab!

Tell him to try Tayaabs, has he been to Wilton’s music hall too? It’s ace!

Right this weekend - on Sunday, Brick Lane and the market are the best, then walk from the top of there to Columbia St flower market (has to be the morning). Then on to the city farm right by it, so cute!! Ah and he’s got hipster shoreditch on his line, very cool. And Highbury further up - beautiful and easy to get to great parks and Angel and all its restaurants and pubs. There must be clubs out there but I don’t know them :)

I love Bermondsey Street and Borough market - and Maltby Street market. Only discovered them a few years ago but they’re ace too, I think on Saturday only maybe?

After work tell him to go to the Sky Gardens at the Walkie Talkie - you have to book a ticket for a place but it’s free. If ever he wants it as a date then find out when sunset is :) it overlooks the city :) (and is free unlike the Shard…)

Unless your son is likely to join a gang, he really will be at minimal risk of coming to harm at the hands of a gang. I come from a very rural area, I've lived in London 15 years now & never encountered a problem. It's a wonderful city.

Thank you all for the recommendations of things to do nearby...I shall pass those onto him...no i've not posted about this before as he's only been in London a couple of weeks...I am going to try and get there for a visit asap so he can show me around.
Like i said he is having the time of his life.

To add to the other voices, I moved here as a teen from a tiny village without even mains water in the Carpathian Mountains. It was fine. I know the areas you name well and I’ve walked them seen I was a teen, and I’ve raised teens who’ve also been fine.

I agree that London at night is nice and crowded. It is also very lit up. I lived there 25 years and no harm came to me at all.
I live in the midlands these days and feel more unsafe here at night. Not that it is. It has much fewer people around and way more dark. It is just a case of what you get used to really. Honestly op please try not to think the worst. London is an excellent place for careers and socialising and generally living it up!