Son living in London

[myusernamewastakenbyme]

Can anyone put my mind at rest please...my 24 year old son has moved to East London for a graduate job and i am terrified he will come to harm...he grew up in Norfolk so not used to gangs..stabbings etc...he lives near Whitechapel/Limehouse area.

I lived in shadwell 20 years ago, it was a right dump and I used to run home from tube or cycle as I felt less vulnerable. But looking back I never had any trouble I was just nervy as a woman alone. These days I'm sure it's a lot nicer. I wouldn't worry about a strapping young man there.

Once again thank you all for your comments and its great to hear of others who live in the areas mentioned...when i was younger i lived all over the UK and never once worried about my own safety....for some reason as ive got older i worry about my adult children and yes i need to address this.

I live in East London, relatively near your son, and feel very safe. If you live near a tube, the streets will be very busy even late at night and honestly feel safer there than I did in 'posh' part of west London. Honestly no need to worry!

My son lives in London he is 24 and been there 2 years. He is absolutely fine. Also a Norfolk young man born and bred! ... I know it's very different from the city and

Arrrgh posted too soon ... and it's very different from our backwater but he's grown, developed and become a rounder person because of it. I doubt my son will stay there for good but life is for living and the best advice I can give is not reflect your anxiety onto him. Be proud !

My husband moved to the smoke to study at Imperial at 18 after a very quiet youth in a village in Cornwall. Decades ago, times were obviously different and the worries and challenges weren’t the same. This was in the early 70s when basically anything went though and there were myriad temptations and distractions.

He survived it all, though, came out with a pretty good degree and is as boring and rickety an old so and so as anyone else of his age is now. Mentally, though, he’s as sharp as they come, remembers his uni years with great fondness (I don’t want to know the details, even now ) and says they were the making of him.

Your son will no doubt feel the same way in years to come. He’ll be absolutely fine.

My DS19 is a student at KCL and lives in a house share in Whitechapel. There are lots of children and families living in the area, he has several primary schools surrounding him. Yes there is knife crime but also lots of ordinary people living ordinary lives

OP, a slightly different perspective. I think one of the biggest dangers for young people are cars (not much experience, sense of immortality etc). If you live out in the sticks then there is always the temptation for someone to drive home after drink on a night out. Sadly, I saw this a lot when we lived rurally in France. At least in London you can pretty much guarantee any cab, bus or tube driver driving your son home after a party will be stone cold sober!

Have you been down and seen the area OP? Sounds as though you are imagining all sorts and totally catastrophising.

I know that area really well, lived there when I first started work as a 22 year old. It's generally really lovely, and I never had any issues or felt unsafe walking to and from DLR, or even home from work in the City at all hours of the day or night.

Get A Grip ffs

oh lucky him! He'll have such a good time.

Agree with pp, lots of normal families live there ,and most stabbings will be gang related. I'm sure he'll be fine. Maybe you should visit a few times and you'll see that it's not some crime ridden hell hole inhabited by knife wielding and gun toting murderers.

I don't think you need to worry. I lived in London for 8 years, never got robbed, stabbed, assaulted or even witnessed anything noteworthy once. Then I went to Cambridge on a day trip and had my handbag snatched from my shoulder. Never got it back. It was nice to come back to London after that.

Been in east London over a decade. It is a much much safer place than it was. Your son will be fine if he follows some basic precautions: don't take drugs, don't join a gang, keep his phone in his pocket and out of sight, be sensible about unlit dark alleys. But then any sensible person would take those precautions anywhere.

In the nicest possible way, you are being ridiculous.

London is absolutely the best place to be if you are a young adult with an income and zest for life.

All you need to do is give him your support and bung him some extra cash from time to time.

Thats awful...i lived in cambridge in my early 20's...i love that city...and yes we do get crime here in Norfolk too.
I appreciate each and every comment even the ones telling me to get a grip lol.

London is a very safe place. There is always someone around. Late night tubes are as busy as rush hour especially these days. I feel much more nervous in quieter places or rural areas where no one is around to hear you scream (freak murders happen everywhere). Obviously if your son got involved in drug dealing and gangs your risk increases but that seems somewhat unlikely?

I lived in Whitechapel and Limehouse for many years. I absolutely loved it! I had lived all over London by that stage, and that area was my favourite by a long way. I was a young professional woman working in the city at that time, and always felt safe and happy, and this was quite some time ago now - 1998 onwards for about 10 yrs.
I understand your concerns, but my DD is now looking at unis and is keen on QMUL - I wouldn't worry for her going there over anywhere else. Honestly, he will be having the time of his life - try not to worry.

My son gets an urber. They do go clubbing and my son is BAME. However the pay off is an enhanced career. I worked in London for thirty years. I now only get taxis as I wear expensive clothes, jewellery etc. Tbh our son will come home but is not worried. Relax. He will be OK

@myusernamewastakenbyme

He definately doesn't have a Rolex...he's got 5 years of studying to pay off...he is completely skint lol...he did get his phone snatched from him on the way to work a few weeks ago though...by a cyclist......he was lucky the mugger dropped his phone and he got it back but its taught him a valuable lesson.

London will make him a fabulously grounded, rounded, open minded (hopefully) young man. It truly is a great city.

beggsie

I lived in Whitechapel and Limehouse for many years. I absolutely loved it! I had lived all over London by that stage, and that area was my favourite by a long way. I was a young professional woman working in the city at that time, and always felt safe and happy, and this was quite some time ago now - 1998 onwards for about 10 yrs.
I understand your concerns, but my DD is now looking at unis and is keen on QMUL - I wouldn't worry for her going there over anywhere else. Honestly, he will be having the time of his life - try not to worry.“

I know envy is a sin. But …… Whitechapel and Limehouse are fantastic. We have friends who live in Whitechapel and every time we visit we’re just blown away by what a fantastic community it is. You name any race, religion, sexual orientation, they live in Whitechapel and everyone just gets along. We lived in Borough many years ago and it was the same there. Anything went and people respected each other’s differences but more importantly liked each other too. The whole world could learn a thing or two from those small places.
In my enthusiasm, I’ve completely forgotten what this thread was about now . Sorry

Seeking teacher advice. My 8 yr old came home from school and told me a boy did a gun sign to him on several occasions. Background, new child mid term joined class. My child really got on with him. However, my child who never (I mean never complains) for a 4 week period came home reporting daily incidents with said class mate. "When I talk mummy he puts hands to ears. When I look at him he puts hands to eyes.' "I went to shake his hand he ignored me." My child & I discussed, had he upset him and he couldn't recall any significant incident. My child had asked many times why he dislikes him & really wants to resolve. But said child said "I can't explain"

Then 4 weeks on, my child looks at other child during a rehearsal and he gets the gun sign (first of many). Do I discuss with teacher? Or just let time heal the conflict? Whatever that may be.

He’ll be fine OP. Whitechapel Is safe enough, so is Limehouse I imagine. Knife crime is almost always in particular areas, and between particular groups. Middle class people in London don’t normally encounter much trouble from one year to the next. I don’t say this because I think the class based nature of experience of violence is ok - it’s just a fact.

I think you have a bad case of empty nest syndrome though, what can you do to move on from this?

I'm from Norfolk (Kings Lynn) and have lived in London for 25 years. I feel safer in East London than on Norfolk St at 1am!

He'll be okay, it's really not that dangerous.