Pamela thread 6 - Bile Duct Cancer, Continued

[WilsonMilson]

Hi all

It’s Kerr here, I wanted to post a quick update as I’m conscious Pamela hasn’t been on for a few days and the thread seems to have reached its limit.

Pamela hasn’t been feeling so good over the last few days - on a positive note, her bloods seem to have stabilised and, all being well, she might be ok for chemo round 2 in the next couple of days. She had a blood transfusion yesterday which, we hope, will also boost her energy levels. On the downside, her jaundice has returned, the bilirubin levels are increasing significantly. The CT scan at the beginning of the week showed no new blockages and our Consultant thought that some early necrosis of the tumour after the last chemo might be contributing, but nobody really knows what’s causing it. Further discussion to take place tomorrow. Seeing the jaundice is one of the worst parts of this, it’s so clear and obvious when it’s happening yet there’s nothing we can do to alleviate it.

Just wanted to let you know the latest. Please, please keep praying for her - she’s my everything, my world, and every thought and prayer is deeply appreciated.

Kerr

Pamela’s frankness, courage and dignity at such a dreadful time in your lives will stay with me. Thank you so much Kerr for updating us all.

Sending love to you, Jacob and Pamela’s mum and thinking of you all. x

Kerr I’m so very sorry to hear your news. I’ve followed Pamela’s posts from the very beginning and her beautiful personality really shone through, as did the love you had for each other. I’m so sorry you didn’t have longer together. Thinking of you, Jacob and all your family and friends. Sending love to you all x

So sorry💐💐💕💕
May you all find peace

With love. Remembering a wonderful person.
xx

I'm so sorry to hear this sad news and so very sorry for your loss. With her words, Pamela painted a vivid picture of a bright, brave, beautiful and sparky woman who was doing everything she possibly could to stay alive for the people she loved. As the large number of full threads reveal, her powerful writing resonated with so many, especially those whose lives have also been touched by cancer and she will be remembered by more people than you could ever know. Please know that you, Jacob and Pamela's family will be surrounded by a wall of love, light and virtual hugs during the days, weeks and months to come. xxx

Kerr, sending you and Jacob strength and courage for the days and weeks ahead. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

What a lovely lady, what a tragedy for you all. I’m so sorry.

I am so sorry Kerr. I also replied to the fake post, how someone could do that is unfathomable.

I had followed Pamela's journey all the way although hadn't posted. I am really sad to hear your news, as I'm sure are the majority of Mumsnet users.

Sending you and your family the very best wishes for some peace. I know losing your beautiful wife must leave the biggest hole. Sending love and light x

Dear Kerr and Jacob, sending you all the love xxx

I’m so very sorry to hear that she’s gone. I’ve never been so touched by a wonderful human that I’ve never met and how amazing Pamela was to request that you updated us all. Thank you. It’s a devastating loss for you all and hope that you find the strength to get through the coming days and weeks. She was a beautiful soul xxxx
💐🌺🌻🌈🌞⛅️

Sorry for your loss 💐

I’m so sorry to hear this sad news, Pamela was a true fighter and I’m sorry you have lost her 😔 Love and condolences for you all 💐

Oh Kerr I am so heartbroken for you to read this. So sorry for Jacob and for Pamela's mum, too. She has inspired so many people with her bravery, her kindness and even the beautiful, articulate way she wrote her updates. She was so open with everything, writing in a very real, raw and intimate way, letting people from all over the world into her thoughts and all the emotions that came and went during the entire process. I have never seen someone have such a huge effect and unite so many people together on here for so long, from all over the world, continually coming back every day to wish her well and give support in their own way whether that be through heartfelt words, beautiful photos, or prayer. I would describe it as profound, and I hope that she knew just what an amazing and inspiring person she was.

Excluding that despicable person you mentioned, everyone who came here over the past few months to support Pamela, myself included, I'm sure are so grateful to her for being so willing to share her journey with us, and likewise are so happy to hear that we could help her along as a part of that journey too.

I will light a candle for you all, her loving family, who at the end of the day have been the most important support she could ever have. Her love for you all, from what she has said here, was immeasurable. I hope you can take some comfort that she is out of pain, and at peace.

Thank you for the abandon of your giving, for seeing in the dark, for making this life worth living.💐

I too posted on the fake thread and cannot believe that such a lowlife would even stoop so low in the middle of your grief for Pamela.

Pamela's spirit shone through her posts in the way that she wrote and she was an incredibly courageous and brave soul.

My prayers won't stop for you Kerr and your family - you will need all the love and support possible while you try and navigate your future without your truly beloved Pamela.

God bless!

I'm so sorry for your and Jacob's loss , condolences also to Pamela's mum . It's almost beyond belief that someone would make a fake post . Take care X

How bloody awful of someone to pretend to be Pamela's husband and announce her death.

Rest in peace beautiful lady, may love, strength and happiness bless your family going forward. You fought the battle well, and now you are in a better place. God bless you all.

Sending love to you and yours
May Pamela Rest in peace

I was only a follower and not a poster, but I am glad that she found solace and strength from the many who posted, and the far greater, like myself, who read and thought of your whole family, but didnt have the words to express that. I hope you are all able to take comfort in knowing that she touched so many people, and even the fake thread, in its way (I didnt see it and Im glad) is testament to how many people were thinking about her.
Bless you all

Oh so sorry to hear this news.

So very sorry to hear about the loss your dearest Pamela ..she truly sounded like a lovely woman

I'm so very sorry and send my sympathies to Kerr, Jacob and all of your family.

So very sad to read this update.

She really gave it everything

My family will hold yours in our thoughts for a long time to come. Wishing you strength and comfort

I am so deeply sorry for your loss Kerr, and my sympathies go out to you, Jacob and Pamela's mum, as well as her wider family and friends.

Usually I would be sceptical of over-identification on an online platform like MN, reminding myself that we essentially are all strangers and can't have any right to share in the grief of people who knew and loved others personally.

However, there was something unique about Pamela: her honesty, beautiful writing style and the sense of herself as a warm, intelligent, loving, and loved, woman, that truly came across in her threads.

In turn I think MN responded in the best way it can - full of practical support, emotional connection, genuine warmth and concern.

Like many others, I felt I 'knew' Pamela, just a bit, from her posts, and was privileged to accompany her a little on her very tough journey. It can sound cliched but truly, she had such an indominable spirit, really fought against the awful illness that took her so young, and her love of you and Jacob, as well as her wider family, shone out.

The threads with photos of beautiful places and pets were lovely to be part of and it is good that in some tough moments they cheered Pamela.

I genuinely feel so sad to hear of Pamela's passing and am keeping you and Jacob in my thoughts - I am sure that the love and happiness you all shared will in time offer comfort.

I hope at some point you are able to read all the messages of support and love here.

Finally, thank you sincerely for taking the time to come back and let us know about Pamela in the midst of your loss and grief. We on MN don't matter in the wider context but we are so grateful you remembered us and took the time.

I don't really want to comment about the fake thread, I am so incredulous that someone could do this. I'm so sorry for any further distress caused to you Kerr.

Ar dheis Dé go raibh a h-anam dílis (May she rest in peace). 💞

Kerr I’m so very sorry. Pamela made a lasting impression on me and I think of her and your family often. Love to you all.

Thank you for the update Kerr. I'm so angry to hear that trolls have attacked the thread.
Pamela as an inspiration to us all with her dignity and courage, we all so wanted her to be well again.
May she rest in eternal peace and sending love and prayers to you, Jacob and Pamela's mum, I hope you can take some comfort from all the genuine messages from the MN posters.
Thinking of you all ❤❤

I am so very sorry to hear your news and send prayers to you, Jacob, Pamela's mum and family.

May Pamela rest in peace.

I am so so very sorry to read your update and was praying that there would be a different outcome for your family. You must be totally devastated and my heart goes out to you, your son, your MIL and all your family. I have not read the fake thread and wouldn't wish too but please remember there are thousand of good people for every one bad one and so many people were praying and thinking of Pamela and sending love and support. There is something far wrong with people who would do such a thing and don't let them even have the same headspace at this horrendous time for you and keep hold of your precious memories and that Pamela got some support & comfort from the mostly wonderful people of mumsnet.