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Original poster

My DH has just been diagnosed with AIDS

126 replies

Thisorthatwhoknows · 19/02/2019 22:18

I need some hand holding. It's been a really tough few years as a family. My DH was raped by 2 men on a stag do just before our 2nd DC was born. He didn't tell me for sometime but did and we've been trying to work through it together. But after 2 years of feeling ill he was admitted to hospital with pneumonia and subsequently diagnosed with AIDS. This is devastating. The form of pneumonia is also very serious. I'm scared he's going to die...

OP posts:
Sodamncaughtinthemiddle · 21/02/2019 22:16

Sending good wishes OP
Horrific time for you all

LuluBellaBlue · 21/02/2019 22:26

Sending you, your husband and family so much love right now Flowers

MissTook · 22/02/2019 11:25

Wishing you and your husband strength and fortitude, op.
My thoughts are with you both. Flowers

MotherOfDragonite · 22/02/2019 14:45

I'm really sorry. What a terrible time for you both.

Do you have any support yourself in terms of counselling, other talking therapy, or friends/family?

CuppaTeaAndAJammieDodger · 22/02/2019 15:18

Oh love - what an utterly shit thing to have been done to your DH and your family.

As someone who was raped (at 14, in the early 90s when the terrifying public service announcements were at their height) and whose rapist's parting shot to me was "ha ha - I've got HIV" I can somewhat understand the immense fear your DH has been living with for years. And now for those fears to be realised must have brought back not just the fear of his present situation, but many other emotions such as anger, emasculation and even shame (not that he has any reason to feel ashamed - or emasculated).

Even when, as I am sure it will, his health improves, things will be different - but I truly believe that a new normal will be found. But you both should seek out and accept as much support as you need (for you and your DC).

You'll be in my thoughts.

StealthPolarBear · 22/02/2019 18:40

How's he doing? Have they got his temp under control?

StealthPolarBear · 22/02/2019 18:40

Cuppa tea that is horrendous x

CuppaTeaAndAJammieDodger · 23/02/2019 07:41

It was Stealth - I was terrified for years.

OP - how is your DH doing? I hope he can start the antivirals soon.

StealthPolarBear · 23/02/2019 13:37

Just came on to see how op's DH is doing I hope no news is good news, he's much better and she's forgotten she even started this thread.

HIVpos · 23/02/2019 15:49

I agree StealthPolarBear...hopefully! From what I know, it can be a bit up and down in the early days when caught at a late stage. Eventually there tends to be more ups than downs though.

Re what you said up thread, not relevant in this situation, but yes it would be GBH if done intentionally - google Daryl Rowe

StealthPolarBear · 23/02/2019 22:20

Thank you

MrsPerfect12 · 25/02/2019 23:26

Hoping your DH is doing well. Flowers

chinam · 25/02/2019 23:32

Hoping things are better today. Flowers

cudbywestrangers · 01/03/2019 07:13

Hope you've massed it through the week This and that your dh is making progress.

Porpoises · 01/03/2019 07:26

I remember your other thread. I'm so sorry to hear this, hope things are starting to improve Flowers

CharlesChickens · 01/03/2019 12:31

Thinking of you and your family op, and hoping that things are getting better.

S021 · 16/03/2019 08:51

I’ve been thinking of you and your DH Thisorthatwhoknows 💐💐
I hope he’s making progress x

S021 · 16/03/2019 08:53

I’m also wondering about your own results 💐

juneau · 16/03/2019 08:59

OP I remember your posts from when you found out. Sending you Flowers and hoping that your own test comes back negative. What a terrible thing to happen to you both, particularly after the devastation of the rape itself. I hope you're both offered psychological counselling to help you deal with this and I really hope your DH is getting better. Is there any news?

AllTheUserNamesAreTaken · 16/03/2019 08:59

I’m so sorry for what your husband and you are going through. Those disgusting creatures doing that to him and now this. Hoping that your husband is improving and that you both have support. Flowers

HighOverTheFenceLeapsSunnyJim · 20/03/2019 15:58

Hope your DH is getting better , and you are okay.

LOTR · 30/03/2019 11:23

Hope you are okay OP Flowers

Dizzywizz · 16/04/2019 21:31

Hi op, how are you and your dh doing?

YouBumder · 16/04/2019 21:33

Oh my goodness, I remember reading your original post too.

I hope your husband is responding well to treatment and you’re doing OK too x

TokyoSushi · 16/04/2019 21:38

Another one hoping that things have improved, I'm so very sorry that you've had such a dreadful sequence of events Flowers