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Moving into the Hospice

234 replies

Knittingnovice · 16/06/2014 08:42

Some of you may know me, most of you won't of heard of me but today at 34 years old I am moving into the local Hospice as I know my life is coming to the end.
I was diagnosed with bowel cancer in 2011 and fought it with surgery and chemotherapy and was lucky enough after being the all clear to fall pregnant with a third child.
Unfortunately in October 2013 I found out that the cancer had returned as secondary bowel cancer in the form of peritoneal disease and liver metastases.
Since October I have undergone 2 more gruelling cycles of chemotherapy and numerous hospital admissions and my tumour is not shrinking and not reacting the the chemotherapy at all.
Everything reached a climax following the bank holiday at the end of May and after two days with the children at Legoland I was back in A&E with uncontrollable pain and vomitting.
Since then my health has spiralled downhill and last week after my discharge from hospital I took the selfish/selfless decision that i do not want to die at home and need to leave lots of happy memories for my children in the home and create new memories for them in the hospice.
I blog about my journey and decisions here

i'm not sure why i am posting this here, but i suppose i want to raise more awareness of bowel cancer and if this post prompts someone to go and get their poo checked out by the GP it will all be worthwhile for me.

OP posts:
weebarra · 20/06/2014 21:29

Hope you had a good day. Our roses are blooming hugely, I hope you have lovely flowers too.

BIWI · 20/06/2014 21:33

Knitting I'm so sorry to read this Sad. But I think you have made absolutely the right decision, both for you and your family, to move into the hospice. Above all, you will be in a place where you are properly cared for and your condition and pain (hopefully) kept well under control.

QOD · 20/06/2014 21:38

Hi knitting, you are amazing. Selfless and a proper mum.

Honestly , your children as they grow will appreciate what you've done for them.

Much love

spanky2 · 20/06/2014 21:39

I just need to add, I find strength from you. I have had an abusive childhood and am struggling a bit at the moment, and seeing your bravery has really helped me face my petty challenges. Thank you for sharing your journey. Yes I am on the wine...Grin

twentyten · 20/06/2014 21:41

Knitting sending you love. Is there anyone at the hospice ( like a counsellor who you could talk to about mil? Just a thought.
They may be able to talk to mil and "help " her? Hope you sleep well.

SnakeyMcBadass · 20/06/2014 21:52

I hope that you are comfortable and able to enjoy the sunshine. My heart breaks at your bravery.

NorksAreMesssy · 20/06/2014 22:08

Hello knitting I have just liked your page on FB
And I like you here too (no like button for MN!)

Any little thing MN can do, I know we will...f'rinstance shall we send some 'heavies' round to have a word with MIL? (I am pretty heavy and I have a portly dog)

You are a tiny bit wonderful

Knittingnovice · 21/06/2014 11:32

Dear all, this is Ruths Husband here. Ruth passed away peacefully last night (Fri 20th at approx 22:30). She had her sister, parents and husband by her side. She was a strong individual who touched so many lives. Love to you all x

OP posts:
Mintyy · 21/06/2014 11:35

I am so terribly sorry. Ruth sounded like a remarkable woman and your loss must be immense. Will be thinking of you and your children today.

Titsalinabumsquash · 21/06/2014 11:35

Thanks My thoughts are with you and your family.

Bowlersarm · 21/06/2014 11:40

So terribly sorry. Ruth sounded amazing. Such a strong, brave woman. My thoughts are with you all.

CrystalSkulls · 21/06/2014 11:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

insanityscatching · 21/06/2014 11:45

Such sad news, thoughts and prayers for all those she loved.

SorrelForbes · 21/06/2014 11:47

So sorry to hear this, my thoughts are with you and your family.

Incapinka · 21/06/2014 11:57

It never ceases to amaze me how different people react. You are truly awe inspiring and are doing what's right for you, your family and your kids. Your MIL is just behaving as mine would... Good luck my lovely and keep posting when you can either to vent or to share. My DM has peritoneal cancer and following her diagnosis I found out who my friends were.

Barbie1 · 21/06/2014 11:58

Very sorry to hear this.

Ruth was so very brave, I admire her so much.

I wish you and your children lots of strength and courage for the coming days and all that follows

Rest in peace brave lady x

weebarra · 21/06/2014 12:02

I am so sorry to hear your news. Ruth was a brave and inspiring woman. I wish you and the rest of her family strength. RIP.

MrsMot · 21/06/2014 12:03

So very sorry, she sounded an amazing woman. Wishing you and your family peace x

malteserzz · 21/06/2014 12:05

Thank you for letting us know,though really sorry to hear your news. She sounded like a lovely lady x

notapizzaeater · 21/06/2014 12:07

So so sorry to hear, glad it was peaceful x

spanky2 · 21/06/2014 12:09

Thank you for posting on here. So sorry to hear of your loss.

RahRahRasputin · 21/06/2014 12:12

I'm so sorry for your loss. Rest in peace Ruth. Love to all your family Flowers

Zamboni · 21/06/2014 12:17

So very sorry for your loss x

5madthings · 21/06/2014 12:19

I am so sorry :(

Much love to you and your family xxx

OwlCapone · 21/06/2014 12:20

So sorry to hear this :(