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Help getting addict sibling out of parent’s house

31 replies

Helpwithsibling · 29/12/2024 08:50

This is quite niche but I’m hoping someone might be able to help. I have a sibling in their 40s who has a long standing (20+ years) drug and alcohol addiction. We’ve tried everything to help them but they relapse every time. They still live with our parents and their life is basically doing cash-in-hand jobs to earn enough money to feed their addiction. They also have children from previous relationships who they don’t have custody of but do still see.

As our parents age I’m becoming increasingly worried about what happens after they die. Our parents don’t have much but they have both worked bloody hard (and still do) and were the first people in their families to buy their own home. Assuming my sibling is still alive at that point, we’re very worried that the house (my parents’ only asset) will become theirs as they live there and will eventually be sold to pay off drug debts.

My parents want to set something in stone while they’re still capable which means that legally my siblings share of any inheritance goes to my nieces & nephews, not my sibling, to prevent this happening.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? Is it as simple as my parents changing their wills then the executor of the will (me) setting up a trust so my siblings share of their estate goes into the trust for when my nieces & nephews reach adulthood? Also legally could I evict my sibling from the house if it’s been their home all their life?

OP posts:
Chersfrozenface · 31/12/2024 10:11

Eyesopenwideawake · 31/12/2024 09:54

What a fertile imagination you have!

The OP has said that the DB doesn't pay keep and earns only enough to buy drugs, so as a PP asks, will he pay any bills or do any maintenance?

And look up "cuckooing".

MissMoneyFairy · 31/12/2024 10:18

I'd look at supported housing for the sibling now, it would be hard for one remaining parent to support them and the house will fall into disrepair. Your parents can leave what they want in their wills but sibling may have rights if they are a dependent.

MissMoneyFairy · 31/12/2024 10:20

There may not be any money left if both parents need care in the future, it's also time for them to set up lpa

Doggielove · 31/12/2024 10:23

Soontobe60 · 29/12/2024 08:54

The house can be left to anyone, with the proviso that anyone still living there can remain until they die / go into care / marry.
Your sibling has an illness, addiction. I wonder if you'd feel the same about them if their illness was, say, MS or cancer?

This!

but it does say it’s parents wanting to set this up

there are plenty of ways to do it but the sibling
struggling with addiction could make a case they were a dependent before death if you cut them out- it’s not that they will get loads (a judge would grant an amount) but they have a right to challenge to get money to support them. This eats up the estate in terms of legal fees

stayathomer · 31/12/2024 10:33

I’d be worried about what to do with them right now as opposed to what happens with the property as as people say, the chances are higher one of your parents will be left with the sibling, also if they still live there when both dies I would assume you’ll have a legal battle on your hands. How is your sibling with them, as in even if they’re not contributing are they part of the family dynamic in the house? Do they get along?

Soontobe60 · 31/12/2024 20:08

Looloolullabelle · 29/12/2024 09:39

What a ridiculous comment.

I grew up with an alcoholic mother. No one chooses to have cancer or MS but addicts choose.. yes they choose.. to have that drink or take drugs for the first time. It might be categorised by some as an illness but it’s something that can be overcome. It might be hard but it can be done and it’s a choice.

Cancer and MS usually can’t be cured. And not a fucking chance in hell would I leave my hard earned property to some addict to fund their disgusting habit.

What about lung cancer brought on by excessive smoking? There are myriad illnesses that are brought on by ones life choices.

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