DS 13 being moved to new foster placement and me not being contacted

[TheLovelinessOfDemons]

My DS has been in foster care for a year and we knew he was going to be moved. Social services haven't contacted me or the present foster carers, they rang DS yesterday and are picking him up today to take him God knows where.

As the only reason he's in foster care is bc I'm a widowed parent, in work and he has ADHD and needs an adult with him at all times, therefore my knowing his whereabouts won't threaten his safety in any way, can they legally move him without informing me?

In the past few years his DB moved in with my aunt bc he has an eating disorder and could eat there, his DF passed away and he's been taken away from me, as he sees it. I dread to think what this is doing to his mental health.

It would be impossible

Genuine question, but how? How would you physically keep him with you at all times? If they want to go, they go.

Yes, I knew he was going to be moved, I'd just had no communication with social services between the last time he ran away and being moved. The foster carers kept me in the loop and thought I'd been told more than I had, which was nothing.

And yes, I said that the other boy there was one reason why he had to be moved.

He has to have an adult with him 24/7 because the moment you take your eyes off him he's gone.

Not give him a door key. Not give him a free travel card. Take him to school and back. Request that his key worker walks him to and from the school gate. They know he's a flight risk but they trust him too much. He doesn't even know why he does it sometimes because he's 13 and has ADHD.

Oh right, yes
it read very strangely. Like you were enjoying the drama.

I did all of this with mine. It’s not possible to stop a child of that age that wants to go, from going. On the way to school, if he decides to walk in the other direction, what can anybody do?
This is not a reason for being in care. They would not put him in care because you work and can’t give him 1:1, as nobody can practically do that in the community.
I absolutely don’t judge you though, for putting him in care if you couldn’t cope. I honestly asked them to do this with mine, in a very similar situation, and they wouldn’t. So I am not judging.
Mine was going missing for days, was involved in country lines, not going to school. I was working, having to go to work and leave them indoors as they wouldn’t go to school, then they would go missing, police would be called etc. It was hell and I had a younger child. Social services still wouldn’t remove them.

I took a job to suit the schedule of school, I would suggest thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of women (and men) do that every day, the breakfast and after school clubs would be overrun if this wasn’t the case.

But you can do that. OP it feels like you’ve given up, which is fine, but it is possible as a single parent to escort your child to and from school and not work weekends, no one is forcing you to work those hours as has been explained to you here by single parents that are there for their children outside school hours. By blaming it on your job you are doing an incredible disservice to parents who jump through hoops to make it work. Your child obviously has much bigger issues, your employment is basically irrelevant here.

I have seen lods taken for less.

I’m a foster carer and took a child as an emergency due to a breakdown in the previous foster care. His mum only found out when we turned up for family time 🥺 it was very sad and she was distraught. I felt so sorry for her. I hope you got answers.