Legal amount to drink with children in the house?

[MBRE]

Just that really. Once the kids are in bed, asleep, if I want a G&T or a glass of wine is that legal whilst still "in charge" of the children if their DF is out? What's the limits etc if the police were turn up and breathalyse me? Are they even allowed to do that? So all kids asleep, over the age of three but two under five, two older ones over ten. What's the actual law around this? Anyone know?

How would they have your number? If they were concerned they would attend the house without contacting you first wouldn't they. Social services wouldn't trust your word over the phone.

I think it's a malicious call your ex is having someone do to be nasty.

I would report it as harassment but also get rid of all alcohol, you are on meds not compatible with drinking, take temptation away

Why would they rock up and remove a child who was in bed if you were drunk? Drunk on its own isn't an issue surely, drunkness leading to fights or abuse or shouting in the streets is a different thing

You said 'a G&T or a glass of wine', then you said you need 'a drink' most nights, then you said 'a couple of drinks', then you said you were on medication that makes you appear drunk when drinking. That your main aim seems to be how much you can get away with legally drinking, and wondering who is reporting you, rather than addressing how to stop your problem drinking, seems worrying.

If it was someone trolling, it’s quite a coincidence that a social worker also turned up AND removed a child.

You have had a series of prank calls, but I between this one wasn’t and your child was removed?

If it was a prank call, who knows what nights you are drinking? How could they possible know you definitely had a drink that night?

If it’s not a prank call they aren’t just saying ‘safeguarding’ they are telling who they are. Either you can’t remember what they said or are choosing to omit it here.

You take medication that makes you appear more drunk if you drink alcohol and you continue to drink anyway? And are convinced you still make good decision and are capable of safely parenting.

Your child was removed and you have stopped drinking ‘pretty much’.

Honestly, Op it sounds like you might have a drinking issue.

What's the med alcohol is interacting with?

Are you failing to observe notes in the patient information about that interaction?

Ten or so years ago I was prescribed Zopiclone to help me sleep.

My partner tells me that if I mixed it with alcohol, at least in a quantity beyond a couple of beers, I'd effectively pass out. If challenged in/en route to my passed out I'd be verbally aggressive in a way I never would with drink alone.

No I mean if they received reports that someone was drunk and incapacitated with kids in the house, then they turned up and that was quite clearly not the case, why would they then remove a child?

we are clearly not getting the truth from the OP. That’s all.

Pretty much stopped drinking and not drinking are not the same.
It sounds like you you're on medication which doesn't mix well with drinking, I'd just not drink at all.

This makes no sense?

So you were looking after someone else's child, SS and the police rocked up, removed them from your care because you were drunk, but left your own kids with you?

Are you a foster carer?

If it's literally a glass of G&T in the evening at home then who is witnessing you appearing drunk after having your medication?

Social care can and do remove a child from a parent who is too intoxicated to care for them, usually to a family member until the parent is sober.
Parents with alcohol issues often have to sign written agreements stating they will not consume alcohol when they are the sole carer for a child.

Why would you drink when taking the medications if that's the effect it has ? Surely you're not meant to drink with medications that react like that to alcohol ?

It might make sense if there were issues with the other parent already. So if that parent has form for going of on benders etc while abandoning the children in the "care" of all sorts of unsuitable/random people and then left said child in the company of someone she didn't know well (OP) who was drinking.

There's no law.

And then police are not going to turn up and breathalyse you.

We don't live in a police state.

There's no legal limit on how much you can drink with a child in the house. It's not about 'going over the limit'.

It's about whether the state you are in makes you incapable of looking after a child and therefore puts the child at risk.

If someone has a very low alcohol tolerance, or is drinking on top of medication, or has other medical conditions that mean alcohol affects them severely, they might be incapable after one glass of wine. For almost a year when I was younger, I was on medication which meant that I pretty much couldn't function properly if I had a drink - it felt like I was about to slip into unconsciousness, like the moments before you fall asleep under a general anaesthetic. I wouldn't have been safe to care for children in that state. But under normal circumstances, I could drink a bottle and a half of wine and still be capable of looking after a child (not that I'd want to - but I'd certainly be awake, capable of putting a child to bed safely, reading them a story etc and easily woken up if they needed me in the night).

I find it quite concerning that a) you think you just 'appear' intoxicated when you mix booze with meds, rather than actually being intoxicated and b) there were sufficient concerns for police and a social worker to remove a child from your home in the middle of the night. I also find it concerning that you're just talking about getting repeated calls from 'duty safeguarding' as if that's just a normal thing that happens, and that you don't seem to really grasp what this means or what the concern is. Your passivity over this seems really odd to me.

I think that if you are mixing alcohol with medication in a way that makes you 'appear' intoxicated 'because you need to relax' while you are looking after not only your own child but also someone else's child, that's not a great sign, to be completely honest. I'm sure it's perfectly possible that the reports of you being drunk are indeed malicious, but on the other hand it's also perfectly possible that you're not being at all honest with us (or more likely with yourself) about the full picture.

It sounds like you may be unaware quite how your drink and medication side effects are actually making you look to others.
It's one thing being a responsible adult and having a drink with children in the home, it's another entirely if you are drinking and looking after someone else's child regards of how you think you feel. That seems very irresponsible to me.

I think the prank ex is a red herring as it is too coincidental that the police actually removed a child from your care. How did that go down with the parent who left that child in your care?
Although if it's happened numerous times and you think it's a prank why are you answering and making yourself look foolish by answering. If you don't answer and they turn up at your home how would you feel? Would you be worried you were too drunk to reasonably look good to them?

Can I suggest we stop offering any reassurance and advice to this poster except "do not drink at all" There is more going on here than we are being told.

Not sure legally but I'll ask you this question. If you went out for a night, and left your kids with a babysitter, would you be happy coming home to them having had a couple G&Ts on the same medications you are on and acting intoxicated? I wouldn't be happy as you can't respond to emergency. Can you imagine one comes down really sick, you can't drive, ambulance would take ages, you get a taxi and turn up to A&E looking absolutely bladdered and having to make decisions about their care in that state?

But 'See if the reports stop' doesn't make any sense here.

You are claiming that the reports are coming from someone (your ex?) who is being malicious on the off-chance that you might be drunk, rather than actually observing you being drunk. So why would the reports stop? Your ex wouldn't know whether you'd had a drink or not. They won't know you've stop drinking, so why would they stop reporting you?

The fact that you feel the reports might stop because you've 'pretty much' stopped drinking makes me think there is way more to this story than you're revealing here, because otherwise it simply doesn't add up.

If I knew I was on meds that interacted with alcohol, I guess I just wouldn't drink. I'd be absolutely mortified if a child over for a sleepover was removed from my care!

If this had happened to me. Honestly I'd just stop drinking for a while, just in case. It isn't worth it. They would have to judge you as capable to be in charge of your children. If your meds exaggerate the alcohol, then maybe you shouldn't drink with meds?

When I my husband is working nights I often consider making myself a cocktail to have in the bath when the kids are in bed but I always bottle it. I worry about needing to take them to hospital or to use the car in an emergency.

No law, but as long as you are still in a fit state to look after the kids, otherwise it would be a safeguarding issue. Ie if someone reported you to social services. Though it would have to be quite a number of occasions for them to do anything! One large G&T is totally fine, unless you aren’t used to alcohol at all

When my sister was a full blown alcoholic and pissed every night, she'd often make up stories about malicious people reporting her to social services for no reason other than they wanted to make trouble. We all believed this. Turned out she was drunk most nights and social services had a legitimate grievance.

You are mixing alcohol with prescribed medicines. That’s your problem. Not one G&T.