Contesting a will

[Spendysis]

I will start by saying dm hasn’t passed away yet
i have posted before about my dsister who has sole poa helping herself to dm bank account and there is apparently an ongoing investigation with office of guidance i reported and they have said they are investigating but I never get any updates
i have also reported it to adult social services I did the initial call and I keep missing the call from the social worker due to work

anyway having recently seen dm and found paperwork for equity release on dm house that she initially said she knew nothing about the said it must be dsister i questioned if she has convinced her to change her will of which dm said she didn’t know then changed the subject

i presume I can’t do anything while dm is still alive and will have to wait until she passes to find out if it has been changed nc with dsister she has blocked me when I politely called a family meeting about money missing from dm bank account. So does anyone have an experience of contesting a will or do I just have to accept dsister who has already had tens of thousands of pounds lent to her but never paid back and now just freely spends dm money will get everything

Thank you everyone for your advice and support. I am feeling down tonight that it has come to this. It’s very easy to say report to the police etc when it’s not your own family your own dsis doing this to you

Hope today has been better for you.

It's the ultimate betrayal by a family member so your feelings are understandable- but you have done the right thing. You can hold your head up high. Let the police do their thing, you have done your bit to try and protect your mum.

@SquishyGloopyBum thanks no not really there was a family celebration (dh cousin they were close grew up together as their mums were twins )daughters graduation-( dh cousin is my dsis best friend )last night and we weren’t invited because my dsis isn’t speaking to me and it would be awkward

last weekend there was a festival on that we always went to as a big group and we weren’t invited we could of gone on our own but i didn’t want to bump into anyone as I have no idea what dsis has said about me

we had a family meeting a year ago when it came to light she had taken money from dm account without her knowledge she had spoken to dm first who changed her story it was all very polite I warned her she may get in trouble banks picking it up deprecation of assets etc that is when she cut me off

dsis has then obviously fabricated some story to family friends and probably dm I’ve done something unforgivable to her to explain to why we don’t see each other as we were close I have no idea what she has said I’ve done she clearly wanted me out the picture so she could continue helping herself to dm money remove me as poa and change the will

so I have been feeling a bit sorry for myself i didn’t ask for any of this haven’t done anything to deserve it and certainly haven’t had a penny of dm money I bumped into another family friend last week who is very involved takes dm to appointments that I don’t know about as she doesn’t work and dsi works full time and she was a bit rude to me

It also came up on my Facebook memories yesterday it was 2 years since my own dd graduation ironically she submitted her masters dissertation that day as well but we took dm dsis and the cousin watched it online then we all went out for a meal

we can’t do any of that anymore because my dsis is being a dick even before social services police got involved which I have only done as a very last resort

Perhaps you need to ask these people how DM is as you are desperately worried and sad. That DSis has blocked you seeing her because you challenged what she was doing and she is taking all your DM money and financially abusing her and the police are involved.

Once you start telling people it gets easier.

Sister is relying on your silence. Agree with @RandomMess

After yet another sleepless night I just go over and over everything I contacted the dr today got an appointment within an hour which is unheard of been given a prescription for sleeping tablets something stronger for my ibs referred for counselling and a sick note for 2 weeks which can be extended

I’ve already explained what’s going on with my manager who is supportive and said i don’t think going off sick will help as i will just sit there overthinking it’s a call centre ish type role in accounting so she’s said it’s up to me she won’t be monitoring my stats and do whatever is best for me

i just find everything triggering we were watching tv last night the antiques roadshow and dd 22 piped up with well we won’t get anything from granny. I hadn’t remembered but dd did dm had a ring with a pink stone no idea if it was real as dm had a lot of costume jewellery as well and dd called it her sweetie ring when she was young and dm had also said she would pass it onto her