Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Legal matters

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

Dealing with my fathers estate woes.

46 replies

rubberthedim · 13/01/2024 22:10

Hi Everyone,

I'm sorry this is going to be quite a long post however a lot is going on that I could use some good advice over or even just some well-placed opinions.

A month ago I received a letter saying my father had passed away, we hadn't spoken for the past few years because frankly, he wasn't a very good person and kept treating his parents (now deceased) badly.

I went a week later to the solicitor who contacted me to find out what was going on. My father had passed away and a friend of his (so he claims to be) handed in a letter which he believed to be a will to this solicitor.

My father didn't leave a valid will. Only a half-baked letter saying he would make one but he didn't and the solicitor I visited by this time had done a valid will search and confirmed there is definitely not one in existence.

So I am now as his closest living relative the beneficiary of his estate. It's not a lot my father wasn't a well-off man or anything and to be honest I am not concerned with his money or anything.

It turns out after a little investigation that my father took ill around May 2023. He had a recurring illness and it led to him dying in August of 2023. The day he took ill he was at this so-called friend's home and his car was left on his driveway. In October some people were acting suspiciously around his car for whatever reason and then my father's landlord decided to take the car away from the friend's home and store it at his property.(I'm not sure I believe the stories of what and why things were done by these 2 people).

Now at the solicitors, he said he had done this that and the other to locate me and verify I was entitled and the search for wills etc. All was left to do was for letters of administration to be filed in my name to tie everything up. I asked this solicitor what would happen next and what the options were as I was worried I was going to get stiffed by a bill over it all, and given my father's history I was of the mindset that I didn't want to spend a penny of my own earned money dealing with his estate. The solicitor told me no that won't happen at all it will all be paid for by the estate, and if there isn't enough money in the estate then the solicitor will just write off financially all the work he had done to date and hand me the file with original documents in. If the bank came back with enough money in it to fund the work he would carry on.

He also said at this point that my father's friend (now knowing that he has no claim to my father's estate) has said he is charging for storage of my father's car, and a few other small items. As did his landlord say he was going to be charging for the storage of the car that he took away in October from this friend's house AFTER my father had passed away.

The solicitor said that if they were asking for something reasonable it should be considered, if not his words "they can go do one".

So I walked away still shaken up by the news of my father's passing. Full of ambivalence because although I had come to hate my father in recent years for the awful things he did. I still loved him.

This was all just leading into Christmas so just before everything shut down I ordered a couple of death certificates of my own just to be safe in case I come to need to prove his death to anyone. The solicitor had given me the email for the landlord so I emailed him saying who I was and explained I knew he had the car there and some of his personal items and that I would be able to collect them anytime he wanted.

He came back to me a few days later and explained a few things about my father's last months (not much was told but I got a sense of what had gone on) and that he had some of his things from his flat in his shed and he also had the car. He also proceeded to tell me then that he was owed over £600 for storing the car since October. (the car he took of his own accord and with no one's permission). Basically £5 a day for this.

The solicitor then told me the friend had been in touch to say he wanted ~£1300 in storage fees for the car being on his drive from May until October (also £5 a day), and for looking after his laptop and his ashes. a few hundred pounds for having my father cremated (the funeral was paid for by my father's bank account).

Now just to put that into perspective. between them, it's around £1900 and counting for car storage. The car is worth only a few hundred pounds at most.

So after all this, I decided I wanted to handle his estate myself, which was almost just having to do the online application for administration which I had done in the past so no problems there. So I emailed the solicitor and said thank you very much for everything you have done but I would like to take it from here.

The solicitor then called me within seconds of the email being sent and said basically, It's almost all done if you stay with us we can get it all finished for you. It will only be a few hundred quid more than what the bill is now because it's pretty much just the administration application to do. But then he made what I thought was an actual valid point and concern.

He said that if I stayed with him he would essentially be able to insulate me from the landlord and the friend when it come to dealing with the issue of what they want for storing things etc. So I decided to stay with him thinking okay well at least if the solicitor deals with them that will be hopefully a better outcome.

I then got another email after Christmas from his landlord reminding me of the bill for storing the car. So I replied and said (I've been polite to everyone along the way) that the solicitor is handling everything at the moment so I can't speak of what may happen about the storage charge however if he was okay with it I would be happy to come and take the car off his hands and also my father's belongings.

I then got a reply from the landlord saying that I cannot have the car or his belongings until either I pay the money he has asked for or the solicitor has agreed to pay it in due course. So I emailed the solicitor explaining what had happened and also said how I felt about the situation. That being before any mention of storage fees or any fee from the friend and landlord my first thought had been one of gratitude to them both because they had done something that they didn't have to do and that I would have probably in my mind after the estate had settled given them some money as a gratuity for what they had done. A small but meaningful amount. However, since all that had been said by both the landlord and friend was asking and then literally demanding money for things my sentiment was they can go themselves *fill the blank. They both just seem to be trying to squeeze whatever money they can from me.

The solicitor came back to me a week later after asking for his help and said I would have to negotiate with them both myself and that he didn't have time to deal with that given he was doing the work for a maximum agreed fee.

So with all this going on, feeling overwhelmed by the demands and the solicitor not doing the thing that he had sold me on staying with him for. I wrote him an email and said I would like to cancel our agreement and finish dealing with the estate myself and that could he please turn over the documents he holds (such as the car logbook) as soon as possible. I said I knew there was some work done for me and I understood being charged for it.

Despite being annoyed with the solicitor over what happened I said in every message that my decision was personal and not a reflection on his work. That I was grateful for what he had done etc etc and didn't say a single unkind thing.

4 days later I got an email saying there was a bill attached. which amounts to £2000. around 1300 or more as I understand it, was for work done before I even met him that he was fine with writing off had my father's estate not been in equity. which he also said I was "agreeable to".

And he said in his email. He would only turn over the papers which include the car logbook once I settled the bill.

Since this email, I have contacted the DVLA and cancelled the V5 as a precaution. I have initiated contact with my father's bank to let them know that I am the person responsible for handling his estate while I try to get my head around everything that is going on right now.

So that leaves me now with, a solicitor who for now won't turn over any of the documents I need. A landlord who wants what seems a ridiculous amount of money for storing a car that he simply took off his own back and a so-called friend of my fathers who wants well over £1200 for storing the car and a couple of computer bits, storing his ashes and money on top for having his cremation taken care of. Oh and also he wants £150 for cleaning my father's flat once when he was in hospital or I won't get any of that or my father's ashes either. I plan on at least giving the friend some money for having taken care of his cremation as I have no issue with wanting payment for that. Even now if both the landlord and friend said don't worry about the money just come get the stuff I would still probably end up giving them something in kind. I just hate the attitude I have been met with by them just seeming to want to make money off of my father's death.

I feel like I am being squeezed in every direction at the moment at a time when I am still trying to get my head wrapped around the fact my father has died. On top of all of this, I have been suffering from major depression for the past few years which isn't helping me to have a clear enough head to figure out what to do.

Any advice, opinion or facts that any of you may be able to give would be so helpful right now.

Thank you for reading this very long explanation of what I have going on right now and need some help/guidance with.

OP posts:
rubberthedim · 16/01/2024 13:51

Thanks everyone for your posts so far. It's a great help having different opinions and ideas.

OP posts:
rubberthedim · 24/01/2024 18:45

Hi everyone, an update on what has been going on.

I've been in contact with the landlord over the car and I have it now in writing that he will not release the car to me without paying his "storage fee". He has no contract or agreement with either me or my late father to have stored the car or to keep doing so and I have requested that he allow me to take it multiple times.

I contacted the police today and explained the situation fully and honestly and they told me that they won't get involved because it is a civil matter.

Can anyone advise what I should do now?

Thanks for all the previous comments it's been really helpful. I appreciate you all.

OP posts:
prh47bridge · 24/01/2024 19:30

Send him a letter before action setting out the facts, being clear that neither you nor your father have any agreement with him that would allow him to charge for storage of the vehicle, saying what you want to happen (the car back or the cost of a replacement) and giving him a reasonable deadline to respond - 28 days is normal. Include copies of any documents you will use to support your case and a list of any documents you want from him. State clearly that, if he does not respond satisfactorily, you anticipate taking court action without further reference to him.

If the deadline arrives and he has not either returned the car or paid the money, you can take legal action. If the car is worth less than £10k, this would be a small claim and you should do it yourself without involving a solicitor. If it is more than £10k, you may want to use a solicitor.

Windymcwindyson · 24/01/2024 19:35

Personally I would tell them all to get stuffed... Doubtful you would get into the computers.. And anything of value will have been sold....or maybe after a while they will get sick of having a battered car outside and tell you to go collect it...

rubberthedim · 25/01/2024 13:54

Think maybe the notice period may be an option. Keep getting messages now trying to pressure me into agreeing to pay for it

OP posts:
Lawnmowerweedslayer · 25/01/2024 16:42

Sorry for your loss

If the car is not worth much

You could contact a car scrappage company & get them to scrap the car & you should receive a small amount of money
Then claim any outstanding car tax back

Chris002 · 25/01/2024 17:12

Do you have the letter of adminstration yet ?

IncompleteSenten · 25/01/2024 17:16

I'd reply thank you for confirming in writing that you stole my father's property after his death and are now attempting to extort money from me for its return. I am proceeding with legal action, and you will receive written confirmation of this in due course.

Then I'd start the paperwork.

rubberthedim · 25/01/2024 18:03

The administration application was submitted a week or so ago. Still waiting for any form of update/first knock back on it.

OP posts:
JanefromLondon1 · 25/01/2024 18:54

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn due to privacy concerns.

Chris002 · 25/01/2024 19:37

rubberthedim · 25/01/2024 18:03

The administration application was submitted a week or so ago. Still waiting for any form of update/first knock back on it.

I have done own probate a couple of times - did you put a probate value down for the car.
What is the probate value and what is the value you be likely to get for it ?

rubberthedim · 25/01/2024 22:19

Probate isn't for much at all. Car was valued at disposal value for the sake of giving the worst case scenario.

OP posts:
rubberthedim · 25/01/2024 22:20

Tried reporting it stolen but the police said it isn't theft because he didn't take the car with intent to permanently deprive

OP posts:
IncompleteSenten · 25/01/2024 22:45

Just without permission and to attempt to extort money from you.
Sometimes the police are fucking useless.

IncompleteSenten · 25/01/2024 22:46

Phone them back and ask them why it isn't a crime to take something from a dead person without consent and hold it for the purpose of extorting money from their relatives.

rubberthedim · 25/01/2024 23:26

Because they took it to supposedly keep it safe means under the theft act they didn't steal it. Blackmail doesn't work without a menace component and extortion doesn't fit either. They have confirmed in writing that with no money they won't release it and also that there was no agreement to charge for the storage in the first place. Which there couldn't have been in any case because my father was dead for over a month when he took it. Legally the only person who could have agreed to it back then would have been me and I had no idea what was going on.

OP posts:
determinedtomakethiswork · 26/01/2024 00:10

This is really awful. All three of them are behaving so badly.

Lamelie · 26/01/2024 00:48

Walk away.

LaTricoteuseVieux · 26/01/2024 01:52

Why are you bothering with all this OP?

Goditswindy · 26/01/2024 02:22

I don't understand why you care about the car? Just leave it, no?

Kwam31 · 26/01/2024 04:03

Why bother with the car? it's of no value, tell him to keep it/sell it.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread