Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Legal matters

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

Original poster

ExH contesting the will

147 replies

DDsInheritenceFromTheFamily · 15/01/2023 12:42

Family Member of ExHs died last year.

She left money to DD, ExH, me, and Ex-SIL. There where others left money but these are the ones ExH is contesting.

Basically I and ExH got half of what Ex-SIL did (makes sense right?) and then DDs money was left in a trust with me. The solicitor handling the estate said that it was because the Family Member didn’t trust ExH to use any of his money sensibly so gave him enough to blow but not harm himself in anyway or trust that he wouldn’t spend DDs money – given that when we split up he closed DDs bank accounts in joint names and never reopened them in his name only that doesn’t surprise me.

ExH is saying that my share of the will was intended for him proved by Ex-SIL getting double the amount ExH and I got and because other members of his family are trusted to look after their own DCs money he should be the trustee for DDs money.

This family member had no contact with ExH after we split (they chose to believe me over ExH and ExH cut them off) but would contact me several times a year to ask after DD, and DD liked to write to them which I obviously facilitated. They often wrote back as well - they lived too far away for regular face to face contact although if I was ever near to them I'd obviously pop in with DD.

The amount left to me isn’t a huge amount (under £10k) but it will make a massive difference to mine and DDs quality of life as I can pay off my debts and maybe get us a dog which will help DD with a physical health condition she has. DDs money I want to combine with another trust I have for her from a family member of mine and give her when she reaches 21 (the one from my family said 21, the one from ExHs family member said when I felt DD could most use it).

Whats likely to happen? I will give up my share if it means ExH doesn’t get anywhere near DDs money.

OP posts:
OhBeAFineGuyKissMe · 15/01/2023 12:46

Was the family member in sound mental condition when she wrote the will? If so I can’t see he has any ground to contest it, he wasn’t been cut off and there is no law that you have to give siblings equal amount.

It sounds like he is just blustering and hoping you will cave. Just ignore him.

Original poster
DDsInheritenceFromTheFamily · 15/01/2023 12:48

OhBeAFineGuyKissMe · 15/01/2023 12:46

Was the family member in sound mental condition when she wrote the will? If so I can’t see he has any ground to contest it, he wasn’t been cut off and there is no law that you have to give siblings equal amount.

It sounds like he is just blustering and hoping you will cave. Just ignore him.

@OhBeAFineGuyKissMe Yes sound mentally, death was unexpected (think like car accident or stroke/heart attack type thing).

OP posts:
user1498572889 · 15/01/2023 12:50

ExH is pushing his luck. Let him spend his money contesting the will. He wont get anywhere.

Sparkletastic · 15/01/2023 12:52

Ex H won't succeed but he might delay things. Just bide your time and keep any evidence of contact with the relative who died.

MrsSkylerWhite · 15/01/2023 12:52

If the deceased had mental capacity, don’t worry your ex doesn’t have a leg to stand on. Ignore, ignore, ignore.

MissLucyEyelesbarrow · 15/01/2023 12:53

If you are in England/Wales, your Ex has fuck all chance of success.

deeperthanallroses · 15/01/2023 12:54

Sounds like you should ignore completely, and communicate only with the executors, saying politely I’m sorry he’s complicating it all for you, I don’t imagine he has a leg to stand on but let me know if you need evidence of my and dds ongoing relationship with the deceased, unlike ex as deceased knew he was mostly a waste of space.
If you do have to speak to ex, smile nicely and say it wouldn’t be appropriate for me to discuss the will with you. I hope it’s not costing you too much to challenge it.

pursudebyablackdog · 15/01/2023 12:54

Let your ex contest the will, if you are in England I think he's very unlikely to win. Your ex is a fool as his legal fees are likely to wipe out the monies he's just inherited. It will also take a massive amount of time. Are you sure he's instructed a solicitor already? Or is he just blustering? Contesting a will isn't for the faint hearted…and pretty pointless for anything under 50k.

deeperthanallroses · 15/01/2023 12:54

Last sentence is obviously completely tongue in cheek but makes you sound very civilised :D

LimeCheesecake · 15/01/2023 12:56

Who is exH saying all this to - you? His sister? The executor ? When he says it to a solicitor, they’ll hopefully put him straight on how unlikely it is to succeed.

Original poster
DDsInheritenceFromTheFamily · 15/01/2023 12:59

LimeCheesecake · 15/01/2023 12:56

Who is exH saying all this to - you? His sister? The executor ? When he says it to a solicitor, they’ll hopefully put him straight on how unlikely it is to succeed.

@LimeCheesecake Me

OP posts:
Dillydollydingdong · 15/01/2023 12:59

Hopefully ExH will get legal advice and understand that he's got no chance of succeeding. The deceased was entitled to leave her money to whoever she wished - no question of it not being fair, or ExH having a better claim than you. She could have left it to the cats' home if she wanted!

TrodOnLegoAgain · 15/01/2023 13:00

Don't give up anything- he is trying it on.

PerilousErection · 15/01/2023 13:03

Save the worry until you hear from his solicitor - and then it's up to him to prove and not you to disprove.

He's tried this before though, hasn't he - wasn't he demanding 50/50 last year? I take it that also went nowhere.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 15/01/2023 13:04

We were told recently that as long as you are not completely disinherited and the person concerned was in sound mind then there is absolutely no chance of any contest of will contents being successfully concluded. Let him waste his money and just wait it out.

America12 · 15/01/2023 13:05

I'd ignore him , he's got no chance.

Talia99 · 15/01/2023 13:06

PerilousErection · 15/01/2023 13:03

Save the worry until you hear from his solicitor - and then it's up to him to prove and not you to disprove.

He's tried this before though, hasn't he - wasn't he demanding 50/50 last year? I take it that also went nowhere.

Not necessarily even then. Some solicitors will write letters based on what they are told. You only need to worry if actual legal proceedings are issued.

Fraaahnces · 15/01/2023 13:07

His share is unlikely to cover the cost of contesting it.

EyesOnThePies · 15/01/2023 13:12

Properly made and witnessed will: ✔️ ( as it was done through a solicitor)
She had capacity ✔️
ExH not financially dependent on his mother ✔️
She left reasons for her decisions ✔️
She was in England and Wales?

He stands no chance.

Mindymomo · 15/01/2023 13:24

I think when your ex finds out how much it costs to contest a will, he won’t bother.

OhIdoLike2bBesideTheSeaside · 15/01/2023 13:33

I know someone who contested a will and lost thousands if I were him I wouldn't bother you'll be fine x

Bookkeys · 15/01/2023 13:38

Do you think he would blow your dd's inheritance too if he was put in control of it?

RandomMess · 15/01/2023 13:40

Let him waste his money trying to contest it.

LimeCheesecake · 15/01/2023 13:41

Let him complain. “I’m happy to follow x’s wishes in their will. If you think you’ve got a case to contest, best you speak to a solicitor, not me.”

StopGo · 15/01/2023 13:41

The relative has played an absolute blinder. They haven't left ExH out of the will so any challenge will evidence what a greedy man he is.