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Original poster

Can they take my baby away

844 replies

saraheve · 06/01/2017 00:23

HI i really need some advice, my 9 year old son was taken into care due to depression i was unable to keep on top of housework, I was binge drinking on weekends and I was in a unhappy relationship with childs farther, since my son has been taken into care I have attended therapy, hired a cleaner, attended a parent recovery group, relapse prevention group and took parenting courses. I am 8 months pregnant due to give birth very soon, I was given a prebirth assessment that said social services will go to court if they see that babys needs are not being met, unborn baby is on child protection and on the plan it says the same, yet social services say they want to take me to court? I was told their is no present concerns and I have addressed all previous concerns yet they want to still take it to court based on pre historic. I have so much evidence of significant changes yet they want to keep me in hospital once baby is born and have a discharge planning meeting where they may take baby away. Have they got any grounds since I have made significant changes and their is no present concerns. I am very devastated please can somone advise me? Thanks.

OP posts:
NewtScamandersNaughtyNiffler · 27/01/2017 16:14

Congratulations she is a beauty

UnbornMortificado · 27/01/2017 16:23

MH teams are usually fantastic and completely impartial.

Having that bit extra support in will no doubt be a positive thing.

Congrats again Flowers

DigestiveMuncher · 27/01/2017 16:30

I don't understand why they have reduced your contact with your son, your reason being they wanted him to settle doesn't really come across as being right, 5 times a year because of them wanting the child to settle is not normally a thing.
I was in care and even though my circumstances were a hell of a lot worse than yours I was still allowed regular contact with my parents. The only time they ever reduced contact was if something wasn't right or something had gone wrong and they felt I shouldn't be involved.

I think you've done really well to get yourself sorted but I think it's too late, you were pregnant when you had your son taken away from you and (I may be wrong) but were drinking and smoking cannabis at this time.. which straight away is a cause for concern for SS.

I wish you luck, I do. I don't think you have told the whole story of what has gone on, but at the end of the day that's up to you to enclose.

runningtogetskinny · 27/01/2017 16:35

Digestive the op has just given birth today, do you really think that comment is helpful??? What will be will be, going back over previous mistakes will just be hurtful to read

Afreshstartplease · 27/01/2017 16:36

Congratulations op Flowers

GizmoFrisby · 27/01/2017 17:44

I agree with digestive. And I wouldn't get your hopes up. Ss wouldn't be taking you to court as soon as you have given birth for no reason. Baby is beautiful. Such a shame

everythingstaken123 · 27/01/2017 18:06

Congratulations! She's beautiful. Made me feel broody!

Don't listen to the negative comments. You have done brilliantly to get this far and you can continue to do well and get your children back. Surround yourself with people you can trust who don't think drinking is cool and who don't pressurise you to do anything you don't want to. Keep on your own positive path forwards and you will do it. The first five months are bloody hard and you've done that. Make a strategy for when things get tough and make sure you have ways of dealing with things that don't involve doing anything that will harm you and your future plans. Good luck. Feel really happy for you. Just try not to worry...trust in yourself and enjoy your baby.

DigestiveMuncher · 27/01/2017 18:22

Fresh she wrote the post asking people their opinions on her situation and I have given my opinion, I didn't see the comments about her giving birth nor the picture of her new baby who is beautiful to say the least, but that's not gonna change my opinion I'm sorry to say.. if she didn't want comments like the one i posted then maybe she shouldn't of done the post in the first place.
Just because she has now had her new born isn't going to change the fact she is in the situation she is in and I am not going to feel bad about that. Yes she has said that she has made a significant change to her lifestyle and that will come under scrutiny when she appears in court but her child was still taken off of her because of stuff that happened.. I was just stating that it may or may not make a difference just like everyone else.. if people think that having one child taken away and being able to keep the other is ok with little contact with the other is acceptable and seemingly "ok" with no raised eyebrows as to why then that's fair enough. And again Fresh if she didn't want to go over "previous mistakes" she wouldn't of put the post up in the first place.

OP, I hope your change makes a difference and can move on from it all and live a good life with your new baby and your nine your old.

Thisrabbitthatrabbit · 27/01/2017 18:27

Best of luck with everything OP. She's beautiful.

Original poster
saraheve · 27/01/2017 19:39

Thanks nomater what happens I'll stick with the changes I've made and fight for her.

OP posts:
DigestiveMuncher · 27/01/2017 19:43

"For her" please tell me why that doesn't say them? 🤔

GizmoFrisby · 27/01/2017 19:56

Digestive I think op is thinking she can keep the baby but not have her son as they have reduced her time with him. I think ss have different ideas. I agree with everything you have said. 👌

UnbornMortificado · 27/01/2017 20:05

Nothing to do with the fact she might not be thinking straight as she's just give birth.

Ohb0llocks · 27/01/2017 20:29

Best of luck Sara

Your daughter is gorgeous (as I'm sure your son is too).

I have a friend going through similar at the moment. My thoughts are with you both and hoping so much that all is positive from here on in.

LottieL · 27/01/2017 20:35

She is beautiful. Good luck - I hope ultimately that the right thing is done for those children, whatever that turns out to be.

DearMrDilkington · 27/01/2017 20:59

Make sure you take lots of photos in case things don't go the way your hoping.

Sorry to be so blunt but it's a possibility and you'll really regret not having many photos. I hope it doesn't come to that though.

MrsPnut · 27/01/2017 21:01

Congratulations Sarah, she looks absolutely beautiful. It's my eldest daughter's birthday today too so obviously a great day to be born. Flowers

Therealloislane · 27/01/2017 21:05

She is beautiful.

I hope you hold on to her & get ds back Flowers

Work your ass off, do everything ss ask of you & go get your family back on track x

lougle · 27/01/2017 21:56

Where has compassion gone to? I despair Sad

Congratulations Sarah. No matter what happens, your baby girl is with you today and she is beautiful.

To other posters, too lazy to read the thread, the reason Sarah has said she will 'fight for her' is because she has already been told there is no chance of her DS returning until she had demonstrated stability for at least one year, so the only question is whether she retains care of her daughter at this stage.

Broken11Girl · 27/01/2017 22:50

Congratulations, she's gorgeous. Flowers Ignore the nasty comments.

UnbornMortificado · 27/01/2017 23:20

lougle completely agree.

sara no one can change the past or predict the future. You don't owe anyone on this thread answers. You concentrate on yourself, your children and proving to SS you can sustain the changes.

AnnieAnoniMouse · 28/01/2017 00:34

Sara. Thank you for sharing a photo - she's absolutely beautiful 💐 She must take after her Mummy 😊 You have done amazingly well, don't let any of the knobs upset you...they're not worth it. I have every confidence you can maintain the changes you have made, keep your darling daughter & get your son back too. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it xx

mathanxiety · 28/01/2017 00:53

Sweet little baby.

Hope your ex is nowhere near.

AndNowItsSeven · 28/01/2017 01:02

She is beautiful Sara.

DigestiveMuncher · 28/01/2017 08:17

Unborn so because someone gives birth and doesn't think straight they forget about their other kids 🤔 .. ok then 🙄 I'm clearly one of very few that think it's not okay for a woman who has had one child taken off of her because let's face it, she took drugs and drunk whilst she was pregnant with her new born but oh she's had help now so none of that matters, to keep her baby.

Funny, I wonder how many of you would be so supportive if she was a woman who took heroin whilst pregnant..