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Legal matters

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Original poster

abducting my kids

81 replies

mamamiamoo · 22/09/2016 19:41

a dramatic title but I am currently outside of the UK in the country of my husband and wish to return to the UK asap with my kids.

The children are British nationals but the country we live in is not signed to the Hague convention and has a corrupt and incompetent legal system.
My husband and I have been separated for a couple of years and he is now threatening to have my visa cancelled and to keep the kids here. I take his threats seriously as he has done a lot of terrible things already and am planning to leave as soon as possible without alerting anyone.

However I am worried that I won't be be able to enter the UK without a letter of permission from him as my passport is not in married/childrens surname.

Any advice appreciated

OP posts:

juneau · 23/09/2016 12:01

Good luck OP

missyB1 · 23/09/2016 12:03

Wishing you all the luck in the world, stay strong

Cherylene · 23/09/2016 18:14

Make sure you buy a return ticket if you say you are visiting relatives.

whothefuckhas5children · 23/09/2016 18:18

good luck

user1473454752 · 23/09/2016 18:20

Not read all the way through, but I would tell him your visiting your family and then just dont go backxx

user1473454752 · 23/09/2016 18:22

I agree about the one way ticket especially if he looks at the ticket.

user1473454752 · 23/09/2016 18:22

sorry return ticket lol

palanca · 24/09/2016 14:45

My advice to ask for this thread to be removed is for your sake OP

Coconutty · 24/09/2016 14:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lweji · 24/09/2016 15:02

I'd advise you to get as much evidence as possible of his abuse, threats, etc.
I think Reunite advice is probably spot on.
There is a clear risk, but having their mother expelled from the country is also as good as abduction, so I'd work to prevent that.
What is contact like between the children and their father?

DontMindMe1 · 28/09/2016 21:58

don't tell him anything - especially about taking a 'trip' anywhere.
don't tell the kids either.

Book your tickets for the next flight, pack a bag of essentials for each of you, pick the kids up from school and go straight to the airport.

In these kind of patriarchal environments most men seem to think it's their godly duty to warn another man if he thinks his wife/daughter/sister is doing something that would be detrimental to him.
The longer you delay the higher the chance you will get caught.
It happened to me-don't let it happen to you.

wishing you the best of luck

FasterThanASnakeAndAMongoose · 01/10/2016 14:08

Any update OP? I hope you're safely back in the UK with your dc.

blinkowl · 01/10/2016 14:16

Wishing you luck

HopefulHamster · 04/10/2016 14:22

Hope all is well, OP

Original poster

mamamiamoo · 05/10/2016 09:41

an update - we're here! Only the departure airport staff asked where was my husband when I checked in.
I had whatsapp contact with my ex immediately the day after we arrived, he threatened there will be consequences to my leaving - I maintained that we had discussed my leaving with kids but he had refused to engage in the planning which is true. I did try to call him many times and even his family the weekend before I left but he wouldn't speak to me.
We've now been here a week and he hasn't called the kids for 3 days - despite him insisting to them they must be waiting for his call at the same time every evening!
So I'm nervously hoping we will succeed at staying! Thank you so much for the support

OP posts:

WatchingFromTheWings · 05/10/2016 09:45

That's brill news. Hope it all works out for you.

lizardslounging · 05/10/2016 10:03

Good luck OP. Good to hear you're back in the UK. Keep notes as you go along of any contact etc. Can you get a lawyer?

juneau · 05/10/2016 11:11

That's great news OP! Wow - well done for getting back to the UK without incident. I hope you don't encounter any problems in staying here. Your ex sounds like someone who makes a lot of noise, but isn't big on action, so fingers crossed.

user1471950254 · 05/10/2016 18:30

Amazing news and good luck. Stay safe

DontMindMe1 · 05/10/2016 19:21

awesome!

Don't spend any more energy on him, he has your contact number so let him contact you.

Now you can start living your lives....and don't worry about anything else. Get a solicitor or free advice so you know your rights and the dc rights.

DarkBlueEyes · 08/10/2016 15:21

Well done mamamiamoo. So pleased you are here safely. And not a bit shocked that the departure staff asked you where your husband was! What did you say?

Hopefully he'll l ose interest soon and leave you alone. xx

palanca · 10/10/2016 14:24

if there are legal proceedings I would strongly advise you NOT to go to your local solicitor but to select someone from the Reunite list as this is a complicated area of the law.

instantly · 10/10/2016 14:35

I get stopped frequently at the uk border and asked to prove DS is mine, but I've never been asked if his dad consents.

The issue is what your ex will do once he realises. There's a strong chance my ex would apply for DS to be returned and would succeed, which is why I'm still in his country 6 years later.

If you think there's no risk of losing your kids then do it. If there's even a tiny risk I wouldn't do it

instantly · 10/10/2016 14:37

Sorry i totally missed the rest of the thread!

Congrats!

ohtheholidays · 10/10/2016 14:37

That's amazing news mama I hope he does leave you all alone and that you and your children get to settle here and have long and happy lifes together

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