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Larger families

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Original poster

How do you stop yourself mentally wanting more

58 replies

Mumof3xx · 06/02/2014 17:52

We have 3 dc aged 6 and under

I would secretly love another

I know my oh would not

I know our house isn't big enough

I know we can't afford it

But I still would love a iddy biddy newborn

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

CrazyOldCatLady · 06/02/2014 17:57

I have 2 (aged 3 and 2) and am starting to get really broody for a third. But we can't afford it, I know my body won't take it, so it doesn't matter how much I want it, it's just not going to happen.

End of story.

Original poster

Mumof3xx · 06/02/2014 18:11

I keep finding myself thjnking what if this what if that

E.g we could put us in the box room and then baby dd could share with a new baby .....

OP posts:

paperlantern · 06/02/2014 18:13

Have a shit pregnancy. laid up with one problem or another for the best part of the pregnancy, with a 1 year old running around. That did it for me. (helpful emoticon)

Maybe ask for shit pregnancy stories

susiey · 07/03/2014 11:02

I think I love being pregnant and growing a baby and love meeting a brand new person but I do not want to potty train any more toddlers or deal with any more tantrums or teach anymore to read.!
That's what stops me I reason with myself that babies become toddlers and toddlers become children!

thereisnoeleventeen · 07/03/2014 12:34

It would seem that even number does it for us...we're going to stop when DC4 is born, but only because I'm not 10 years younger. Both DH and I secretly wanted another, we just didn't tell each other that for ages.

I reckon if ever I have them all out of nappies and able to put shoes and socks on independently then I'll stop wanting more, at that point I will have become used to life being that bit easier and I won't want to go back.

Wishfulmakeupping · 07/03/2014 12:37

I had my first baby last year my beautiful dd. i always wanted just 1 my oh wanted 2, now I'm a mum I want lots more. I would ideally love at least 3 oh is still stuck on 2 for the same reasons you've put OP its sad isn't it but finances will probably mean I can never have a big family I would love for dd to have lots of brothers and sisters but don't think its to be

ChocFudgeCake · 14/04/2014 19:57

I stop myself by thinking of my pelvis floor

ChocFudgeCake · 14/04/2014 19:58

I should add that I have 4.

Misfitless · 15/04/2014 07:29

I've found that planning something that I couldn't possibly aim to do if I got pregnant again, helped me.

For me, this is a career that I've always wanted to pursue, but put on hold to have more babies . If you're already established in a career that you love, not sure how that is helpful, though!

Also I'm very much looking forward to being able to spend more time with my DH as our children become more independent...weekends away without having to rely so much on our parents, having a bit more money by working in a better paid job to spend on our family.

Having said all this, the career thing coincided with my youngest starting school this September, whereas, with 3 under 6, you're possibly quite a way off the youngest starting school.

At any point, if my DH had asked if we should have another, I'd have jumped at the chance, up until about 12 months ago, when I decided to go back to college; so it did cure me, I think!

imip · 15/04/2014 09:08

I'm just waiting for menopause...that should do the trick

devoniandarling · 21/04/2014 20:56

This is something I am really struggling with at the moment too.

I have four children, aged from 11 to almost 5.

I am so broody I cant stop thinking about having another baby. DH has made it quite clear (by going behind my back and talking to my mother about it) that he doesn't want another child.

It's killing me. Literally. I feel so desperate to have another child and I don't want to have a massive age gap/almost grown children and a newborn. I don't know how to sort this out. The idea of not having another child fills me with despair.

Misfitless · 22/04/2014 16:59

It didn't cure me, as it happens, although I thought it had. I'm now feeling really broody again , though I know it's cyclical and will pass.

Hope the feelings of despair pass, Devon

imip · 23/04/2014 05:53

Tbh, I wa sterilised 2 years ago as part of dc4 c-section. I constantly fantasise about pregnancy again, despite my age and the fact that I took permanent measures to prevent it (deliberately). But I've accepted that they are just fantasies.... Unfortunately.....

3DcAndMe · 23/04/2014 06:13

It's difficult isn't it!

I never thought I would be one of those women wanting a huge family!

rabbitrisen · 23/04/2014 10:30

As like crazy, I knew my body couldnt take any more.
But that isnt necessarily the same for everyone.

Livvylongpants · 23/04/2014 10:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MultipleMama · 08/06/2014 13:49

We have 6 and DH informed earlier this week that he's done, he's not sure if he wants anymore but for now, we're done. I am completely devastated but in my head I know it's the most pratical choice but my heart says my body can take more which DH says I can't without exhausting myself further

Teabiscuits · 11/06/2014 01:16

Im 27 weeks gone with number 4. I had a panic earlier because I thought my waters had gone early. Nope. Had just wet myself a bit when I stood up. I'm 26 and soon to be buying tena lady...

If nothing else think of your poor fanjo!

princesscupcakemummyb · 16/06/2014 13:40

im ttc my 4th hubby is all up for i love babies i think 4 is going be a handful but it doesent stop me being broody my youngest is 7 months and when they hit this age i tend to want more

restandpeace · 16/06/2014 13:52

Having a fourthcured me

restandpeace · 16/06/2014 13:57

The pregnancy was hortific, didn't get the birth i wanted, four are expensive and i feel pushed to my limits at times.

TheWomanTheyCallJayne · 16/06/2014 13:58

I have four
Dh had the snip
I can want all I like it's not going to be happening

restandpeace · 16/06/2014 14:29

Mines had the snip too which probably helps

Mumof3xox · 18/06/2014 06:27

I started this thread in feb

I still feel the same!

I wonder if a fourth would cure me!

stolemyusername · 18/06/2014 06:40

I have a large family, and I will always want another. But what I want is another tiny newborn that I can cuddle all day, I don't want months of sleepless nights, continuous amounts of washing. I don't want a tantrumming toddler or another stroppy teenager.

I'm also enjoying:
Getting in the car without an assortment of bags, changes of clothes, nappies, drinks...
Not wrestling a toddler that is as stiff as a board into a car seat
Not lugging a pram everywhere I go
Having a culpa without demands to 'share'
Child free time whilst DC are in school
Conversation with my children instead of random screaming and hand gestures
A meal out with my DP

In a few years time my youngest will be old enough to look after themselves, DP and I are looking forward to weekends away and holidays that aren't child centred. Take outs that don't come through the drive through!Money to spend on myself instead of yet another pair of trainers/vans/this band tshirt!

This is what I remind myself when I start romanticising about another baby!

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