Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Investments

Discuss investments with other users on our Investment forum. For more advice read our tips for saving for your child's future.

Original poster

Would you trust your 18 year old with £30000?

145 replies

bravobravo · 31/08/2017 21:56

My dm set up a trust fund for ds many years ago which he knows nothing about.
He'll be turning 18 in a few months and as a surprise dm will be announcing the news he'll be receiving a wedge basically.
Instead of feeling excited, grateful and happy I'm frankly scared and think he's far too young and inexperienced to be in sole control of such a large sum of money.
Dm said I need to stop mothering him and accept once he turns 18 he's an adult - I don't agree and would much rather the money was instead deposited in instalments.
Who is in the right here?

OP posts:
NoArmaniNoPunani · 31/08/2017 21:57

Unless you have a highly unusual teen he's going to blow that on useless shit

hambo · 31/08/2017 21:58

It's something my children will have also and I daydream of forging their signature and investing it again until they are 30. I think it is legally his though as it is in his name? So can't be given in installments??

Cailleach666 · 31/08/2017 22:00

I wouldn't trust an 18 year old,

My DS best friend inherited £20K a year ago and he had pissed it up the wall in just a few months. Not a bean left, and nothing to show for it.

khajiit13 · 31/08/2017 22:00

Everyone I know who had received sums of money at 18 have frittered it away. I would be accepting of installations but in reality you have no say over it

chelseahotel · 31/08/2017 22:00

I wouldn't assume that at all. I hope you've taught him financial awareness and management. I hope it's invested well. I'd talk him through what it could mean. Perhaps a small part for spending with the bulk tied up for long term.

Out2pasture · 31/08/2017 22:01

No, their brains aren't fully formed.
I know of two young people given large sums exactly like this and they bought vehicles immediately with their money. both had accidents with the said vehicles and the money was gone poof...within 2 years.

babyturtles · 31/08/2017 22:01

Ahh

I would hide it until he was looking at buying a house or something, he might be sensible and not piss it up the wall but you don't appreciate how hard saving up a deposit is until you're there!

krummymummy · 31/08/2017 22:02

Please if you can put in place some form of safety net. I.e can only spend on travel / saving for house/.

Said from someone who regrets blowing money left to her. (Not that much though)

thingsthatgobumpinthenightouch · 31/08/2017 22:03

I wouldn't trust an 28 year old, I know I would have blown it at that age. That's why my ds has an account that he won't automatically get when he is 18.

BossWitch · 31/08/2017 22:04

No no no!! I am a really quote dull and overall responsible person. I got 10k at 18 and while I didn't piss it up the wall (driving lessons, cheap car, helped pay me through living costs at uni as parents didn't pay towards these things) I wish I hadn't been given it then. I'd have found a way to pay for those things somehow and would have been able to get on the property ladder a lot earlier if I'd been given it at, say, 25.

Ttbb · 31/08/2017 22:04

Maybe offer to give him extra if he uses it all to buy bonds?

CaptWentworth · 31/08/2017 22:04

I had about 5 minutes of excitement imagining what I was going to buy before DF told me that I was buying a flat Envy In all seriousness, I'm now so glad that I did.

Kerberos · 31/08/2017 22:05

I agree. 18 year olds cannot be trusted. If he gets it now it'll be gone within the year.

chelseahotel · 31/08/2017 22:05

I don't accept that 18 equates with stupid and irresponsible.
You know your DS though

Maryann1975 · 31/08/2017 22:07

This is exactly why there are no accounts of this nature for my dc. No way do I think it's a good idea for 18 year olds to be give. This amount of money. My friend had a fabulous wardrobe full of clothes, shoes and bags, a fabulous social life, full of eating out, takeaways and clubbing. It was all frittered away. No way am I saving hard for my kids to do that! I do realise that this is no help now though. I think you have to hope that you have taught your dc good money management and try to impart your wisdom of saving it for something long term (house deposit). Unfortunately if it is in trust until the 18th birthday I don't think there is anything you can do though.

Theorchard · 31/08/2017 22:07

Well your ds may learn a very expensive but very valuable lesson whether he fritters it or saves it. Maybe get him an appointment with an IFA so a neutral third party can help him think about what he wants to do with it, what he could use it for, and perhaps illustrate just how long it might take to save that kind of sum on an entry level income i.e. How long it might take him to replace. Put him in control, and treat him like a proper adult with proper advice from an expert. Teach him about compound interest if he invested £30k, earnt 8% interest on average between 18 and 60, then on his 60th birthday he would have. £850k. And with some effort and learning 8% is achievable.

DD0314 · 31/08/2017 22:07

No chance I'd trust my 18 year old with that much! Looking back I wouldn't have trusted my 18 year old self either. I don't think you can do much except encourage him to put the bulk of it into a high interest account or something similar until he's in a position where he needs it (house etc).

MrsDmitriTippensKrushnic · 31/08/2017 22:07

I love my DSs to bits (17 and 19) but no I wouldn't want them to have the stress of being given that huge sum of money with no build up or warning. DS2 is going to get about £1000 at 18 from a court trust fund (car accident when he was 2) and we've been discussing it for years - what to do (blow a little on a treat, then use the rest on 'sensible' things) £30k would be a tempting amount to do something stupid with as an adult!

I don't think he should just be given it, not without a cooldown period, not without discussion and sensible advice. I like the idea of instalments unless there is something a lump sum could fund (car/tax/insurance/lessons?)

RebornSlippy · 31/08/2017 22:08

No, I wouldn't. Speaking from personal experience and while nowhere even near this amount, money I received at 18 was quickly squandered. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed spending it. But I really I wish I hadn't been able to get my hands on it until I was older, when I really needed it for sensible adult type investments.

forgottenusername · 31/08/2017 22:10

I've got 19 and 17 year old dds. No way I'd trust them with that much money in one go.

Kindoline · 31/08/2017 22:10

NO

I don't know one person this has worked out well for.

Totally outing but one friend bought a years round the world ticket. Landed in the first country and lost 25k in TWENTY FOUR hrs in a casino. Flew home a week later in disgrace and his parents didn't talk to him for 3 years.

Another bought a stupid £££ car, insurance and put it into a wall.

Others it was spent on alcohol and drugs

RosemaryHoight · 31/08/2017 22:13

I don't know what you can do about it though, it's your dms money to give away. I'd have a word with her, because 18yos can be very impulsive still.

If I was your mother I'd rather it go to something to help his financial security like a flat or a credible business.

ImperialBlether · 31/08/2017 22:14

No way, not even the best child in the world can cope with that sort of thing. She sounds crazy - why doesn't she hold onto it until he needs a house?

childmaintenanceserviceinquiry · 31/08/2017 22:15

Terrible idea, as other pps have said. 25 would be the youngest.

RippleEffects · 31/08/2017 22:18

I'm guessing that £30k is a huge amount of money to those in your DS's peer group and not a sum he would likely get again as a lump sum. 18 is young to take that responsibility and get real use from the money. So I'm with you in thinking about installments.

I'd be tempted to discuss with him having £3 - 5k to do with as he pleases, travel, get a basic car, blow a bit etc.

Then with him, put the rest in various savings acounts that have various access conditions so a certain amount in an ISA (or even LISA as it'd get topped up 25% and be restricted to house deposit/ pension with top up). A certain amount in a savings account as cash etc.