October FET

[InfertilitySWS]

Hi! I’m starting the process of a FET in September, transferring a 4AB early October. Trying for baby number two. Anyone else? Would be great to have people to talk to amongst the symptom spotting, line eyes and general freak outs ☺️

I have a different progesterone medication this time.. its capsules that are placed in the vagina and not pessaries. Like I have to hold them in until they break down and absorb. That's what im assuming by looking at them. They have a coating. They are called utrogestan 200mg , I need 4 a day, 2 in the morning and 2 at night. Anyone use something similar? Down side about using progesterone is the leaking and clumps from long term use. Not pleasant

@stillbelieving2 this is our 4th IVF and we did 2 IUI.
This time lasts year I had a miscarraige which was tough but showed I can get pregnant.
Last go in April was nothing but turned out the donor sperm was not the quality it should have been and so not really counting it.
This has been the best yet and we can't believe it! They say 3rd/4th fo are commonly best rounds for a lot of people. I know people on 12 and don't know how they are still trying!

On day 4 of oestrogen, first lining scan on 28th to see how lining is getting on. My anxiety is through the roof!

@Miraclemuma03 That's a lot of capsules. Check with your clinic but once inserted they'll readily dissolve, I don't think you have to hold them in place. I had a lot of build up and then suddenly it all disappeared. Very odd!

@PlanBFertility it's so stressful, all the hoops you have to jump through. Hopefully you can distract yourself a bit with something absorbing/grounding but if not then know it's normal to feel anxious about this because essentially, we have no control. Thinking of you.

I have these. They are not pleasant! I have to do them three times a day and lie down for 20 minutes. They leak a (sorry, TMI but necessary) sort of thick white gunk.

(And no, you don't hold them in place.)

Good luck for the 28th!

I mean with my pelvic floor muscles lol that I no longer possess lol

I think where my fresh transfer ended in a MMC, I just can’t see any positives. Really difficult head space to be in.

Sorry, @PlanBFertility. How are you feeling on the meds? I don't know if it helps but I felt really unsettled on lots of progesterone, and gradually as the oestrogen took over I felt better. It might be the drugs will start giving you a bit of artifical confidence if nothing else!

Hi Please can i join? I had my 5d (4AA) FET on Monday (4 days ago) Im on lubion and pessary's and oestrogen. I stupidly tested this morning and got stark blank.
I have 2 children from a previous relationship and have had 3 mmcs with current partner.
I am using donor eggs due to my age ( i am 47) .
We are using the london egg bank and have the silver package where you get half money back.
Just feel so down at the min and im having sharp pains under belly button.

That sounds like implantation pains? It's definitely too early for a positive.

Lots of love - it is brutal! I am waiting on my viability scan Monday week, and was up half last night freaking out about pains on one side.

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply 💝.
I do hope so, I just feel so down and like there is some impending doom to come. I know it is the meds but its hard to shake. I keep crying.
The stabbing pain last night actually made me shout out.

Monday! God its awful waiting on a weekend. Will you be 7 weeks then? And yes nighttimes are worse arnt they when your mind works overtime.

Sending you so much love for monday!

Oh, you poor thing. That does sound d very painful. Could you ask the clinic what they think?

It's horrible not knowing how to interpret symptoms.

And yes, I'd be 7 weeks if I get there. Fingers crossed.

How do you feel in yourself?

I tested so early because i was seeing on forums of women getting positives at 3 and 4 days past transfer 😥.

x

I think those must be trigger shots tbh! It is definitely normal not to see a positive yet.

And I'm OK, thanks for asking. Just nervous!

Ah ok thank you. I don't know what a trigger shot is. I am certain i didnt have one lol.
We have unlimited fets. and 8 blasts in the freezer.
Just really wanted it to be the first time selfishly.

Yeah you will be nervous, I remember my viability scan before we accepted that we needed to use a donor egg. Honestly i don't think i slept that weekend.

Don't be upset if they dont see much with my son who is now 19 we didnt see anything at 7 weeks . it was the 9 week scan we saw a heartbeat. x

A trigger shot is what you do just before egg collection, and if you have a fresh cycle, the hormones from that trigger shot can produce a false positive after transfer. I've seen threads (mostly on reddit which seems to attract this!) from people who are all excited by a positive on day 2 or 3 - it's not a true positive. I wonder if that's the sort of thing you've seen?

I would be worried if we didn't see a heartbeat at 7 weeks, yes. I know sometimes you don't and it's fine, but my impression is that it's one of those things where the technology has improved over time and you expect to see more, earlier. I don't remember being very nervous with DD nine years ago, but I was fairly innocent!

I know it’s unusual but I got my BFP on the evening of 4dp5dt. Tested out my trigger so knew it was a real positive. Not that it lasted long though 😔

@Wen19 Hi, I just read your messages and they resonated a lot as I've also used donor eggs and am 48. I'm 6 weeks pregnant and got a positive on day 6. A very faint line. The impending doom feeling...I hear you! I'm having terrible evenings at the moment where I just feel miserable/uncertain/overwhelmed yet fine in the day! The crying is definitely the meds, the hormones and remember it's a lot to carry and process. Personally I'm all over the place.
@SarahAndQuack Roll on Monday for your viability scan. Will be thinking of you. These aches and weird feelings are really disconcerting. I also get aching in right side and start catastrophising. It's so hard not to!

Something I'm finding quite tough emotionally is that a very close friend has basically ignored me since I shared my news. She has had IVF herself and has one child. She also tried for a sibling and it didn't work. I know my pregnancy stirs a lot of emotions in her as when I was pregnant with my son she barely made eye contact for the duration. Then things were better when she had her son. Our kids are so close. It just suddenly feels very awkward between us and if I mention anything about my treatment /pregnancy, she changes the subject. I know how hard this all is but thought she might be able to be a little supportive. This may be harsh but I feel hurt and more than a little irritated by this.

Oh, that is really tough, when you have those shared experiences.

I wonder if it's that she just doesn't know what to say because she knows too much? I mean, I have friends who've been lovely and they almost say the wrong thing, because they're so innocent - you know, they think it will all work and they don't see a road ahead full of pitfalls because they've not really had experence of what can go wrong. Whereas, your friend who did IVF successfully then unsuccessfully probably does know, and she might just not know where the balance is between 'yay, you're pregnant' and 'woah, long road now ...'.

It is hard though. There are so few people who have this experience, and you need the support.

I have been here before and its awful. When we decided to start over having babies, I had a very close friend I did everything with, she was my best mate for over 11yrs and i thought she was my person and we would have each others backs for ever. she always knew we would have loved more kids and eventually go down back down the ivf route and she always said to me she could never do it again and we were crazy, she has 5 kids and she said she always struggled when her kids were young and she didnt enjoy being a parent to them all, she struggled to afford the kids she had and couldnt give them all the things and help they needed. We helped her family out alot, especially when all the kids were younger, we took them alot because she struggled to cope, we helped with food and fuel and getting the kids to daycare and school just to relieve some pressure and her husband isnt a working man and he likes to live off the government so makes finances tight, we helped with the things the kids needed and was generally just there for her. When we finally fell pregnant with my now 3.5yr old she went funny, I wasn't allowed to talk about my pregnancy, she was upset that we didnt miscarry him as we thought we were going to due to bleeding and him measuring behind and she was generally upset even though I worked so bloody hard to fall pregnant and keep that baby and had just had a miscarriage at 9 weeks a couple of months before hand, but took us 2yrs to have my son and she just went absolutely cold. I confronted her and she said she wanted a baby but she apologised but said her husband didnt want more kids because of said reasons above and he knew they wouldn't be able to manage, I mean these people put their kids on rations for food so they can afford to smoke. I couldnt understand the jealousy because for years she said she would never do it again. The relationship became strained from there and eventually after a long drawn out process of lots of trauma and stuff I had to end the friendship because it became toxic from jealousy, i went on to have another baby and she was being very unpleasant. I get people get upset because they either are struggling to have a baby or extend their family but I dont think someone else who has also struggled to have a baby should be punished for finding success. Any baby should be celebrated whether its you or a friend. You shouldnt be made to tread on eggshells around people and you should be allowed to be happy for all the hard work you have put in to create that life. No one knows the true extent someone has been through to create life..

@SarahAndQuack @Miraclemuma03 thanks, it's hard when friendship feels conditional. I know it's triggering when you long for a baby yourself but I naively thought she'd be able to still show up as it were. I've had so many friends fall pregnant over the years and for some reason it didn't trigger me in the same way. I saw it as completely separate to my experiences. But I know we all process things differently of course. Thanks for replies.