FET Aug 2024

[Gnatalie16]

Hi,
Is anyone else getting ready for FET in August? I've just started oestrogen got my 1st scan booked for next Wednesday.
This is our first transfer so lots of mixed emotions but trying to remain really positive.

@Hoppy1985 I'm sorry the transfer didn't go well. It really sucks when things don't work out how we want and honestly this whole process is full of stresses and disappointments. It's normal to feel disappointed and negative about the shit show which is IVF. I hope you can rest this week and focus on yourself. You might still have a great outcome so do hold out hope for that.

My positives have lightened even more and definitely aren't where they are meant to be for 16dpo, 11dp5dt, so I suspect its a chemical. I had an HCG blood test this morning and waiting for confirmation tomorrow or the day after about whether to stop progesterone. Having some cramping in the meantime. It's really hard to get so excited and then feel so let down. I feel like that's a constant in this process and I'm so tired and over it. I also worry that I've done something wrong and caused the failure which is really difficult to deal with. I also hate that I feel jealous and bitter towards people who get pregnant so easily (especially the smug entitled ones who just complain). I've said no to all baby showers and intend to avoid pregnant women for the next few months. Weirdly, once they have a baby, the jealousy stops mostly cause it looks like so much work.

@SamVan so sorry to hear that your tests are lightening. Did you have a beta already or was this your first today?

@Hoppy1985 dont ever feel bad about sharing your journey. The point of this is that we all support each other. Good or bad! Keeping everything crossed that you still get a good outcome.

Ah @SamVan I'm really sorry you're having a tough time. I will keep my fingers crossed that your bloods show positives and climbing HCG though. Have you already had one to confirm pregnancy that they can compare to?

I do also understand the desire to distance yourself from all things baby. I found it quite hard in that most of my friends, especially the closest ones, all had kids at a similar time and during that time I had my first two positives, then miscarriages. I have reconciled with that all now but it was really hard at the time. Then my OH's sister had kids (she has 4) and his mum is an all-in grandparent and talks about the kids all the time, and every time we saw them I felt like she was telling me about another member of the family that had had a baby which again was hard, but we don't live near so it was easier to distance myself from it a bit more.

What i know I'm going to really struggle with is when my younger brothers and their partners have kids, as we're all really close and we see each other a lot. I don't want to take any of the shine away from any of that for them when it happens, or my parents, who I know would like to be grandparents even though they don't impress it upon us, so that's going to have to be a real struggle in secret thing.

Thank you @Hoppy1985 for sharing, I completely agree with your fellow IVFer. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you xx

@Kp121 and @Hoppy1985 Thanks. I've only just had my first blood test today but I have taken an insane amount of pregnancy tests (damn those things are expensive and add up).

Totally get the struggle in secret. It's so hard with family as well as I imagine you want to see them and know your nieces and nephews too. Are your brothers planning to have children soon? I'm glad your parents don't put pressure on you although it is annoying when family members have baby fever and just can't stop telling you about other babies. It's good you can limit contact with your in-laws for that reason. My mum literally sends me scans of her friend's grandchildren and photos of them visiting them all the time despite me flat out ignoring any messages of that kind. I've been avoiding returning to my home country because I just don't want to deal with the "why aren't you having children" questions.. Also all my friends (like literally all) are pregnant or just given birth right now though, so to avoid pregnant people is really difficult. And I just don't want to be like that. I'm not a jealous person in general and I want to be happy with them and celebrate. But it's just difficult sometimes, especially when I haven't told them about our struggles. I'm trying to look on the bright side that having had these difficulties is likely to make me more sensitive to other people's private struggles and I'll also be so much more grateful when I do have a child compared to a lot of friends who seem to just take it for granted.

@Hoppy1985 thanks so much for your candid post, for what it’s worth I’m really glad you had the courage to post. This is my third transfer but I did 5 freezing rounds before to get here, so while (so far) it’s going ok for me this time, my first and second clearly didn’t work as I wouldn’t be here doing a third if they had. My second transfer in particular was a very similar story. Be kind to yourself over the next couple of weeks, I’ll be keeping everything crossed for you. I truly know the feeling of thinking it will never happen, I have a very very low AMH so getting more eggs is a massive battle and that pressure is horrible.

@SamVan - so sorry if it’s not looking good. Hoping you get a decent HCG back. Please don’t think it is due to something you did, it almost certainly isn’t. Unfortunately some embryos just aren’t going to make it and there’s nothing we can do.

I’ve been avoiding things for months, I missed my best friend’s baby shower a few months back and my nephew’s first birthday last week. I just couldn’t face being around loads of babies. If you feel you are able it might be easier to be honest with people and say you are having fertility problems and find it too hard. 1 in 6 couples have problems. Honestly there is not a person I have told that has not mentioned someone else they know who has been through IVF, it’s shockingly common. Be kind to yourself.

Hi everyone, hope you don't mind me joining. I've been for my scan today and FET is booked for next Tuesday. I was originally told latest date would be Monday but when they booked it in it moved back a day because of bank holiday. That will be day 23 of my cycle, does that sound normal? I was worrying it was too late in my cycle or does it not matter if I'm still taking estradiol. I only have 1 frozen embryo so want to make sure we have the best chance possible. Wishing everyone lots of luck for your own journeys , especially everyone who has had a tough time this cycle 💗

@CharlieBarlie1 are you doing a medicated or natural FET? Assuming it’s medicated then as long as you start your progesterone 5 days before your transfer it’s totally fine. They moved my transfer one day back for this cycle as they don’t do weekend transfers, so I just started my progesterone one day later. It’s implanted and I’m currently in very early pregnancy!

@CharlieBarlie1 I've not long had my FET and it ended up being day 29 because of my lining not thickening enough and also annual leave at the clinic!! I'm sure my acupuncturist was happy for me to pay for extra sessions 😂but this was a medicated cycle - so like @Zypig says, if you're medicated you will be fine.
I ended up asking for another scan of my lining the day before my FET though just to make sure my lining hadn't shrunk in the long wait as didn't want to unnecessarily thaw my last embryo also! Good luck for yours! Currently waiting out for OTD so fingers crossed!

Thank you both for clarifying. Yes I'm on medicated cycle so should be fine. As its my first and only embryo I was worried that the bank holiday was going to mess things up but I feel better now!
@Zypig congratulations thats amazing news
@MA48 hopefully you have positive news soon too!

I hope you ladies don't mind me joining. I'm in the dreaded tww after FET last Thursday, so I'm 6dp5dt (never sure whether you count the transfer day or not). This is my first FET after failed ICSIs and I'm doing it naturally as I really don't feel like I respond well to the medications. I'm really not handling the wait well though. I tested with a cheap pharmacy early test this morning and it was negative. I know that's maybe still okay, but I also see so many people testing this early and getting that extra line. I've never had one. This is the 10th year my husband and I have been trying to have a baby and I'm trying not to lose hope. Has anyone ever gotten a negative at this point and then it turned out to be a positive in the end?

I'm trying to keep my mind off it by working but honestly, I'm getting no work done and it's all I'm thinking about 😭

@BeKookyLilacLion Welcome! I'm also in the TWW, my transfer was last monday. If you look further down the thread you'll see my post about why I'm not overly hopeful and why i'm waiting for OTD. Day 1 is actually the first day after transfer so this morning you'd only just have been 5dp5dt and that's assuming you had it in the am on thursday so it's VERY early to test and I really wouldn't read into a negative at all at this point. I would leave it at least another couple of days if you can before trying again, otherwise you'll drive yourself nuts. I do get the total anxiety of the wait and wanting to test though, but you certainly shouldn't lose hope at not having a line today xx

@BeKookyLilacLion oh I meant to say we've been at it for 7 1/2 years so not quite as long as you, but I get it. I'm sorry you haven't had any success yet and I will keep everything crossed for you. xx

@CharlieBarlie1 My transfer is a few days before yours (this Friday) we can do the dreaded 2ww together. This is my 4th attempt eurgh!

Hello ladies, had my transfer at lunchtime so I'm PUPO 😄
Went quite smoothly (after last time where they had to do it twice as it was still inside the tube), now just relaxing on the sofa watching the crown for the rest of the afternoon. I feel like I missed out by not having the traditional McDonald's 😀 I'll catch up later this week haha!
I'm also on a medicated cycle and it is day 22 so I'm part of the "later" transfer day club

@Loute02 glad it went well. I know what you mean about the Macca's, I feel like i've missed out on something that should be my right 😂

@SamVan How did the results of your bloods go? I hope they were better than you expected.

I think they probably will start having kids in a couple of years, they're both planning on popping the question at some point in the near future and I think they'd like to be married first. They both have younger partners though so they do theoretically have a bit more time.

@Zypig thanks so much for your message. Yeah it's tough isn't it. This is my third transfer but i only got 3 embryos across 3 rounds (they definitely overmedicated me on for 2nd EC as i got like 30 eggs and not one made it to blastocyst). I have hereditary condition so we've been doing PGT/PGD and 50% of my blastocysts had the gene hence why i only ended up with 3/6 usable. So this is my last go.

It sounds like you've had a really hard go of it so i am so happy for you that you've finally got your positive and I hope it's only positives for you from hereon in. It'll all be worth it if there's a baby at the end!

@AnonS good luck for Friday, yes we can! I'm not looking forward to the wait but trying to stay positive x

Transfer twin! Good luck. We only have one top grade embryo and the other is borderline. I'm feeling really positive after 18 months of feeling quite negative.

Our first round was really upsetting - I went for ER and they collected zero eggs. That floored me. We're using donor eggs now and I'm more excited than nervous the closer it gets to transfer day!

I really wasn't sure if I should post but as I started the thread I thought I should. So today is my OTD and we have our BFP! We are really excited, just waiting for a call today from our clinic to give them the result and then be booked in for our 7 week scan! I'm wishing everyone that had or having transfers all the best luck and hoping you all get the result you deserve, as IVF is hard work!

@Gnatalie16 oh Congratulations! And absolutely you should post & share your fab news! Personally it gives me hope that all the ivf can work!
But isn't it funny how pre all of this, we would have been (or maybe this is just me!) unsure of telling people about our ivf treatment! Also, you're sharing it with people who totally understand the struggle to get to that BFP, so the congratulations mean even more! Very pleased for you!
My OTD is Saturday but husband is away, so not going to test until Monday morning!!! The wait is going to drive me crazy - but not sure I can deal with a negative result and him being away!

@Gnatalie16 huge congratulations!!! And yes you absolutely should share your great news. We all know how tough this IVF thing is. Enjoy that line joy xx

Congratulations @Gnatalie16 🥳 What an amazing news! Hopefully we'll get many more of those on this thread.

Hi ladies, hope you don't mind me joining. I've been for my scan today and have been booked in for FET next Wednesday. I'm on a medicated cycle, which will be D17 of my cycle - is that too soon? We had 3 frozen embryos from a previous cycle but this one is the better quality, the other two are not so great.

Congrats @Gnatalie16 that’s great news!