TTC no.2 after successful IVF for no.1

[Chocoholic85]

Hi,
I’m just after some advice and to see whether anyone is in the same boat!
Just found out that my 3rd FET failed.
We are very lucky to have DD who came from our first fresh transfer. We were also very fortunate to get 5 frozen embryos from that round so have been trying for a sibling. 1st FET was BFN, 2nd was a chemical pregnancy/early miscarriage and 3rd now is failed. Down to the last two and starting to feel the pressure and also wondering why on earth it isn’t working?!
We have unexplained infertility so nothing was ever found with our initial tests and I was 34 when we had out first IVF round so odds were in our favour. I read somewhere that at 34 around 50% of embryos are abnormal so I guess out our 6 maybe the last 3 were all abnormal. I’m also worried something has changed since I had to have a csection for DD. I did have an ultrasound which showed the scar had healed fine and there no niches, I’m wondering if there are adhesions that might not have been seen on the ultrasound though.
Would love to hear any advice for what to do next or from anyone else in a similar position. Thanks x

Sending hugs @loulamay It doesn’t matter how long I’ve dealt with this infertility shit, pregnancy announcements still get to me. I hope you’re feeling ok now. DD has always been a terrible sleeper and I relented to co-sleeping a long time ago! She goes through good phases and bad. We had a phase for 4.30 am wake up all summer but she seems to be out of that now 🤞I hope your daughter pulls out of her phase quickly!
Welcome @Swirls346, I’m sorry that you’re in the same boat as the rest of us! We’ve only got 1 embryo left so feeling a lot of pressure and also trying to plan ahead financially for another round if we decide to do that. We always try naturally inbetween but I have little hope in that!
@Eggling I’m glad you’re feeling positive 😊 Great news that you’re ovulating too!

@SErunner Thanks for your reply! Great to be in a group where people understand.
Yeah so our first round of ivf we got 17 eggs, 7 fertilised and 2 made it to blast. One was top quality (my son) and the other wasn't good enough to freeze. So we are very lucky but if I was being honest I was really deflated at the time not having any frozen (before I knew i was pregnant).
My partner is in great health and eats well, goes gym etc so we were shocked when his sperm count was low but they did find two varicoceles on his ultrasound. We are in the process of doing the baseline tests again to get referred and I think they will offer him an operation. If that goes ahead it might or might not improve his sperm count but I would want to exhaust this option before going for ivf. I have PCOS and wasn't ovulating at all really so we found it impossible to "try " really. I'm 2 stone lighter than before pregnancy (bmi 23) so not sure whether that's kick started my periods again but I've deffo been ovulating so feel like there's more of a chance naturally if that makes sense?
We have our own house and car etc but no spare money what so ever so wouldn't be able to rush into ivf just yet. I'm 27 and partner 36 so I feel like we have some time to try naturally even though chances are low.

@Chocoholic85 will you be having a FET soon? How did your first ivf cycle go? Xx

@Swirls346 I’ve had 4 transfers from this round ☹️ Well, 5 if you include DD. I had an early miscarriage in Feb and the others were all BFN. No explanation, putting it down to bad luck and IVF being a numbers game. I had all the testing (and husband too) and was given the ‘unexplained’ diagnosis, which is pretty frustrating. That was 4 years ago now. I’m 38 so clock is ticking if we want to do another fresh round. I’m taking a break from all the FETs at the minute, may go back to use last embryo later this year but I’ve felt so exhausted by all! I’ve realised this past week how much better I’ve felt and realised that I really do a break!

I hope your husband gets treatment soon, it must have been devastating when you found out. It’s all so unfair with fertility, fit & healthy people having problems whilst other people who don’t give a damn about their health get pregnant at the drop of the hat! If you are able to go back for more rounds hopefully your chances are a lot better given your age. We used some inheritance we had to fund most of ours and saved for this last one. It’s so depressing thinking about how much money we’ve wasted ☹️

We have been in Newcastle for the past two days - our DD had her MRI scan and clinic appointment but we are absolutely thrilled to say that all her results came back clear! The type of tumour she had was benign and rarely comes back but always good to get the news officially. Another scan in four months but if that's also clear then they move to twice a year which is excellent.

Delighted that we can now go ahead with the egg retrieval knowing the good news as well! Have stopped the Crinone so just waiting for my period now and then start stims on day 2. Here we go again!

How is everyone doing? x

@loulamay fantastic news about your DD! I bet that's such a relief for you all. Great that you can go into this next round feeling positive too. Sorry you had a surprise pregnancy announcement, it's always a kick in the gut isn't it. I really hope one day I can be genuinely happy for people instead of forcing a smile then having a cry later!

@Chocoholic85 it's so unfair isn't it - I've had more than a few rages about how many people that don't care at all get pregnant at the drop of a hat even when they do everything "wrong" and we're all here working our socks off!

Hello @swirls! I have pcos too and don't (or very rarely) ovulate - interesting you said losing weight has helped as I'm wondering if I should do this, my bmi sits around 26 now and I'd love it to be lower just really struggling to actually diet or do any exercise at the moment 🙄 we have male factor too (morphology / motility issues depending on the sample and also seemingly the consultant we talk to!) and I get how frustrating it is not even to be able to try. I hope you get a plan in place quickly!

I've had a really hectic couple of weeks which in some ways is good as it's kept me occupied, I'm not good at the TWW and this isn't even a "proper" one. I'm on the progesterone pessaries so will have to do a preg test at some point before I stop them so my period can come and I'm just dreading it, I think our chances of conceiving this way must be absolutely minuscule but there's always that bit of hope and I can't help but symptom spot (basically nothing though and certainly not that the progesterone wouldn't cause). I wish you could just know straight away so that then we could just move on!

Hi everyone, hope you’ve all had a good weekend.

@loulamay I’m so pleased to hear that your DD’s appt went so well. It must have been such a massive relief ❤️ Great news that you can get started again soon too! Hope everything’s going ok with the new clinic.

Welcome @Swirls346 great to hear from you. I’ve found it so helpful and therapeutic to talk on this thread, I’m sure it’ll be the same for you.

@SErunner I’ve paused the C25K as my period started and I started on the meds again! I’m sure it wouldn’t do me any harm to be out running (I was only up to a very slow 3K anyway) but I decided to take a break for this FET. My old clinic advised me too and I can’t get that out of my head, rightly or wrongly!

My period started last Sunday so it was all systems go again! I’m just on 6mg of estradiol and one Clexane a day at the minute. I managed to get some more Clexane and Estradiol from Asda - I found a place called Cherish to rewrite the Spanish prescription. Asda had to order in the Clexane but it was really quite cheap compared to what I was expecting.
All our blood test results are ok, they just want a specific one for the Hep B for me, but my co-ordinator rang me on Thurs and said they could do it over there, the day before the transfer when they test my progesterone.

I’ve had my lining scan this morning at Ultrasound Direct and it was 9.4mm and trilaminar which amazed me as I can’t remember when they last described it as trilaminar on a lining scan. Plus I’m just on 6mg and not 8mg of Estradiol as I have been for my last three transfers, so maybe that’s a good thing? Obviously the old fluid problem was back 😏 I knew it would be - I noticed some cervical mucus this morning. Anyway, the sonographer said it was just in my cervix and tracking up to my c section scar, not in the cavity, so I’m hoping the doctor will say it’s ok.

I’m just waiting for the email now. My coordinator said she’d let me know this afternoon so I’m trying to be patient, but I can’t help worrying as usual!

I’ve had a bit of a look at hotels and flights. Hotels in Barcelona seem to be much more expensive than Prague 🤦‍♀️ I don’t want to book anything until we know for definite, but if everything is ok, then it should be next week.

@Eggling Glad you’ve been keeping busy. I know what you mean about the symptom spotting and the dread of the pregnancy test. It never gets any easier does it? Do you know how soon you’ll be able to do one?

@Chocoholic85 Yes I’m with you about the wasted money. I’ve bought myself a little notebook to write everything down and try to be more organised, including writing down all the expenses that mount up. We’re using our savings that are supposed to be for house renovations. Spain’s much more pricey than the Czech Rep so it’s definitely going to mount up quicker. I’m not sure whether it would have been better to just stay a bit more disorganised!! Xx

@KLM25 that all sounds really positive! Lining sounds great and good that they are positive about the fluid too.

They said I could test at 11dpo which seems insanely early? I'm sure he said start the progesterone on the Sunday night (1dpo) then test ten days later and decide whether to continue or not. It's annoying as I'd rather just wait for a period but the progesterone will most likely hold off the bleed for me so not sure what to do.

Tested this morning and BFN so I guess I stop the progesterone now and onto the next cycle. It would have been too good to be true but I really did want a miracle and my symptoms have made me think one might be on the way.

@Eggling I’m sorry to hear about the BFN. It always feels like a kick in the teeth, no matter the circumstances. I’ve always, without fail, felt like I’ve had some symptoms during the 2WW and I think it makes it so much harder when you take the test and it turns out to be negative.
I’d have probably been thinking, oh maybe it will work this way instead of normal IVF, and would have had that little bit of hope as well. It’s tough every time. I’m sending a big hug.
You’ll be able to get on with your next cycle now, when you feel ready x

Thanks @KLM25, it's our wedding anniversary on Friday and I had this whole thing planned in my head if how I was going to surprise DH, I've always wanted to do that. it never gets easier does it. At least this let down hasn't cost us any money beyond the £10 I shelled out for an early response test this morning I suppose - always a silver lining!

Sorry to hear about your BFN @Eggling ☹️ It never gets easier. I still hold on to that 1% of hope each month. Have you got any nice plans for your anniversary?

@KLM25 sounds like it’s all go at your end! Hope everything goes smoothly. When is your transfer booked for?

I'm really sorry @Eggling. It's always crap however much you've tried to prepare yourself for it. I had a lot of 'symptoms' with both my last transfers that failed. From recollection with my daughter I had barely any until a day of 2 before when I had some cramping and thought AF was coming. It's all such a head fuck! Have you got any nice plans for your anniversary?

@KLM25 definitely worth doing what feels right for you. I've continued running in all our cycles up to transfer but have always stopped for the TWW. Great news about your lining! That sounds really positive!

@loulamay delighted your daughters scans were okay and the frequency can ease off a bit. That must be a huge relief. When is your period due? How are you feeling about starting again? are you doing anything different this time?

@Chocoholic85 I struggle reconciling the money aspect too, and often think what we could have done with all this money. It is so frustrating. I can understanding wanting a break, I felt like that too and actually do feel better with no active plans for treatment in place at the moment. I'm trying to focus on other aspects of life and am managing to do so reasonably successfully!

@Swirls346 well done you losing all that weight, that must have taken some effort. Do you have an idea of timelines yet for surgery for your husband?

@Eggling No It never does get any easier. I’m already dreading doing the pregnancy test for this transfer which isn’t a very good way of going into it, is it?! Just trying to protect myself I suppose. Like you say, plenty of silver linings, not least the expense of it all. Happy Anniversary to you both ❤️

Thanks @Chocoholic85 and @SErunner It’s planned for next Wednesday. The doctor didn’t seem concerned about the fluid but I have emailed today just to double check whether they want to scan me again beforehand. I hope I don’t accidentally talk them out of it 🤦‍♀️😂 I’m just trying to remove all my little niggling worries I suppose. They’re doing a progesterone blood test and the missing Hep B test on the Tuesday so maybe they could do it then if needs be.

I’m getting to Barcelona on Monday and my OH is flying out on the Wed. He won’t make it for the transfer but it’s more so he can carry the luggage on the way home on Thurs. My previous clinic made a big thing out of no heavy lifting so it’s made me completely paranoid. I think our little boy will weigh more than my wheelie bag but there you go, I suppose you just have to do your best and try not to worry. Chris will only be there for about 24 hours but hopefully we can have a wander round after the transfer and a nice meal out somewhere x

Gosh just catching up. It was my Mum's 70th so I drove 4 hours down on Friday and the same back yesterday with our daughter to celebrate. Am now in Edinburgh getting my ultrasound done and we fly to Brno on Wednesday! I feel like my head is on a swivel especially since I haven't told work and am only taking Wednesday off (we both work remotely so just need our laptops and wifi and can work from anywhere). Need to find a loo somewhere soon to do my meds. All of us have colds and a sore throat (thanks nursery) and I'm yet to book our car hire or airport parking. Trying desperately to avoid negative thoughts around the frantic nature of this having any impact on our results but just going to have to go for it! Scan today should tell us if I'm responding to the stims - come on follies....

@Eggling so sorry for your BFN. It's all so unfair.
@KLM25 safe travels! Gosh it's all happening! keep us posted.
@Chocoholic85 @SErunner @pamplemoussee @Swirls346 are you all well?

I had my day 7 scan - completely amazed that I have 20 follicles, 12 on the left and 8 on the right ovary!!! Blown away. All look good sizes too so I am really hoping this means a decent egg retrieval and some nice embryos to work with. Obviously, it doesn't tell us anything about the quality, which will be the sticking point, but I was expecting about 5 or 6 follicles so this is a really great start.

Continue the stims tomorrow but with Cetrotide as well to stop me ovulating and then day 10 scan once we're in Brno on Thursday morning.

Ahh fantastic news @loulamay!!! Well done follicles! Hope your journey goes smoothly x

That’s fantastic news about your scan @loulamay, I’m sure you’re over the moon about that 😊 Safe travels to Brno.
I’m in Barcelona! I know what you mean about everything being a bit frantic ☺️ We also went to a wedding on Saturday so I’ve had to juggle the timings of injections and tablets a bit, so like you, I’m hoping it’s not going to have a detrimental effect!
My flight left at 13.30 yesterday which is exactly the time I normally would do a Lubion (great planning by me) so I was rushing around Heathrow ystdy trying to find a toilet with no queue so I could leave it as late as possible!
I’ve been to the clinic this morning and had a blood test so they’re going to phone me this afternoon to let me know if I need to up the progesterone dose.
Everyone was very nice, it’s about 20 mins walk from the hotel so I’m glad I know where I’m going for tomorrow morning and the transfer.
I also stocked up on medication at a nearby pharmacy, I’m not convinced it was any cheaper, but I’ll compare and if there’s a next time I might just go to Asda again. It won’t feel quite as glamorous but anything to save some money!
Great news that you can work anywhere. Are you taking your daughter with you? My OH is flying out tomorrow morning so our little boy only has to stay the one night with my MIL. His flight’s at 6.30am from our local airport and in true Ryanair fashion, it’s taking him to Barcelona Reus which is 90 mins by bus away 😂 It was the cheapest way of doing it and he should be here by lunchtime so we’ll get the afternoon together although he won’t be here for the transfer. He’s only coming to carry the bags really - I’m so paranoid after my previous clinic made a big deal out of no heavy lifting. I’m going to need to get that worry out of my head when I get home and just try to minimise it where I can, I think.

Hope everyone else is doing well and had a great weekend x

Excited for you both @loulamay and @KLM25! God I can't imagine coping with the logistics of being abroad on top - hats off to you! Hope things are continuing to go well? Do you have time for any downtime?

How are you @Eggling?

I'm okay. Still relieved to not be juggling fertility treatment with life I think! And it's nice being off hormones, my skin is much better which is making me feel better about myself! I've booked at HyCoSy scan for the week after next with my clinic. It might be a waste of money as there is no reason there would be anything wrong with my tubes, but I want to know things are as well as they can be while we TTC naturally. If there is an issue I'll probably look to get that addressed because on paper we should be able to conceive naturally eventually but never have. I don't know if this makes any sense, but it does in my head! I kind of just want to know there isn't anything other than the DOR limiting us. We're going to book the sperm fragmentation test the consultant recommended after Christmas I think. I'm on my supplement regime and enjoying running a lot again at the moment. Still need to psych myself up to signing up for a race!

Thanks so much @SErunner We’re back from Barcelona with one little embryo onboard ❤️ Everything went to plan, my treating doctor was unexpectedly there (they don’t do the actual transfer) so I met her in person which was lovely and I also met Luca!! He asked if he could give me a hug and we had a quick chat ❤️ Everyone was very kind and friendly so I came away feeling that we’d made the right choice of clinic.
I accidentally didn’t drink quite enough water as I didn’t want to overdo it after previous experiences, but the doctor said it was ok and that they could see what they were doing.
They projected a picture of the embryo up on the wall and the embryologist came in and explained it all, she also said it was a good embryo, 4AA, which confirmed what my previous clinic had said, so that was reassuring, although I don’t actually believe the grading means very much in reality.
Chris arrived a little while afterwards, after a journey which didn’t quite go to plan ☺️ but I met him at the station and then we had a walk around Barcelona and went out for dinner. We flew back yesterday and got home in time to pick our son up from nursery ❤️
My doctor also reassured me about lifting bags and our little boy. She said to think about all those women who get pregnant with toddlers already, and not to worry about it. Completely different advice to my previous clinic. Who knows eh, but I’m going to take a relaxed approach this time as Chris is back to work tomorrow and I’ll need to carry on as normal!

Hope you’re getting on well in Brno @loulamay, I’ve been thinking about you.

@SErunner that’s great that you’ve booked a Hycosy. It’ll be one less thing to worry about if you know that test has come back clear. Plus like you say, I’m sure it’s great to have a break from the hormones and be back running again. It’s so good for us physically and mentally I think. Hope you find a race to sign up for. Will it be a half marathon do you think? Chris has got a 10k at the end of Oct so we’ll be going to cheer him on for that.

Hope everyone else is doing well and has some exciting/relaxing weekend plans! Xx

Such lovely news @KLM25! Glad all went well and will be keeping absolutely everything crossed for you. The clinic sound fantastic - which one is it (sorry I'm sure you've said). You and @loulamay have made me wonder whether we should look at doing our next cycle abroad if it saves money. On paper we're not complicated, it's just a numbers game really I think for us. Have you got anything planned for your TWW to keep you busy? I'm sure the lifting is fine as they say - glad they reassured you.

ah, @KLM25 I have been thinking of you too and am so glad it's gone well!

We have been having a lovely time really. @SErunner I must admit the first big travel day was long and tiring but after that, it's been really lovely to be somewhere different and I've been very impressed with our clinic so far.

I had totally forgotten about the egg retrieval bloat. Goodness me. I look half pregnant as it is - the cruelty! Things going as planned though and I go under on Sunday which just happens to be our wedding anniversary lol. Can't wait to get them out and deflate a bit. Trigger shot tonight in about an hour!

Hope everyone is well xx

16 eggs retrieved and 12 mature! Delighted!

Thanks so much @SErunner and @loulamay ❤️ It’s Institut Marques. I’m not actually sure that Spain is much cheaper but we kind of had our hands tied when it came to transporting our embryos. Having said that, I’m very impressed so far and it does make the whole thing more pleasurable to have a few days abroad!
I’m keeping fairly busy, I’ve got something planned every day. Chris is off for the next 3 days so we’re using that free National Trust autumn offer to go for a day out somewhere the three of us, on Wed. Just have to decide where! We went to Belton House in Lincolnshire last Oct which was lovely.
I feel fairly relaxed at the moment but I have to say I’m really dreading doing a pregnancy test 🫤🤦‍♀️ I ordered a pack of two FRERs on Amazon which came ystdy. OTD is next Mon and I have to say I have no desire to test early so far! I feel like I want to stay in this little bubble of hope 🤦‍♀️ Maybe I’ll feel differently by then.

@loulamay That’s fantastic news! I’m so very pleased for you ❤️ Hope you’re feeling ok and there’s great progression over the next few days. What’s Brno like? Will you be staying to have a fresh transfer? Xx

Glad it all went well @KLM25 and that you had a positive experience with the clinic and felt reassured - that in itself makes such a difference to the whole experience doesn't it? Completely understand the pregnancy test dread, it never gets easier. Everything crossed for you.

Fantastic @loulamay!! Hope you're recovering well, cheering those little embryos on 😊😊

I am booked in for transfer on Friday which is sooner than I expected, just trying to sort childcare for DD so DH can come too. I'm feeling a bit odd this time round, kind of going through the motions expecting it not to work so we can move in to a new cycle, but then I want the embryo to feel wanted! 😅 have booked a holiday end of the month so either way we have something to look forward to. Have to pay my cancelled cycle fees now though which is always a kick in the teeth - dread to think how much we've spent in total over the years.