TTC no.2 after successful IVF for no.1

[Chocoholic85]

Hi,
I’m just after some advice and to see whether anyone is in the same boat!
Just found out that my 3rd FET failed.
We are very lucky to have DD who came from our first fresh transfer. We were also very fortunate to get 5 frozen embryos from that round so have been trying for a sibling. 1st FET was BFN, 2nd was a chemical pregnancy/early miscarriage and 3rd now is failed. Down to the last two and starting to feel the pressure and also wondering why on earth it isn’t working?!
We have unexplained infertility so nothing was ever found with our initial tests and I was 34 when we had out first IVF round so odds were in our favour. I read somewhere that at 34 around 50% of embryos are abnormal so I guess out our 6 maybe the last 3 were all abnormal. I’m also worried something has changed since I had to have a csection for DD. I did have an ultrasound which showed the scar had healed fine and there no niches, I’m wondering if there are adhesions that might not have been seen on the ultrasound though.
Would love to hear any advice for what to do next or from anyone else in a similar position. Thanks x

Hi all, hope everyone is doing ok?

We've had a bit of a ride with the clinic. We were booked in for a consultation yesterday which was, as I understood, to discuss the pgt results and plan the transfer. Did the usual panic rearranging of work etc to ensure we could both attend. Anyway, the results weren't back which was really upsetting. Still spoke through a transfer plan with the consultant but it wasn't anything new really so felt like a bit of a waste. He said he'd chase up with embryology where the results were.

I then get an email from my patient coordinator (who we have found generally useless throughout) just before 5 saying that the embryos hadn't even been biopsied yet and would be sent for testing next week if we signed consents etc. I was massively confused by this, obviously couldn't reach her as she's pressed send then left the office, sent a couple of irate emails then managed to get hold of a different dr who explained.

Essentially because they in have one embryologist who can biopsy at the moment, they decided that to manage the workload the embryos would be frozen, then thawed to be biopsied, then re-frozen. Apparently I was told this by the embryologist when they rang to give me my day 3 update. I do now think I remember this, but I also remember that my understanding was that the testing was still to be done that week so we would have the results back. I've been under the impression these past few weeks that the testing was being done and we'd be able to do a transfer cycle in March. We did come up with a plan last night that may allow the transfer to go ahead in March of the results come back in time, but I'm feeling so shaken and upset by the whole thing and it's really knocked my confidence in the clinic.

Does anyone else really struggle with their clinics communication? We are with create - we started with ABC which is their "budget" option so I kind of sucked it up as part of having a lower price, but now we are paying an awful lot of money and I feel like I'm having to do a lot of legwork to get them to do anything which is making the whole miserable process even more stressful than it needs to be. I never get anything on writing from them except for a handwritten note with timings for trigger shot and egg collection. I sent a final email to my patient coordinator last night (I'm quite sure my name is mud in the office this morning!!) setting out what I understand the treatment plan to be going forwards, to try and avoid any miscommunications in the future. I'm so so upset and disappointed though and feel really thrown by it.

I don't like to kick up a fuss generally and I don't want to be a pain in the arse for them, but when I think of eg the work I did as a solicitor, I would follow up my advice to the client in writing where it was significant to the case. I'd also make sure I checked their understanding! We are paying a hell of a lot of money, am I out of line to expect something similar? I know some clinics have portals where you can access your notes, create don't have that.

I spoke to the clinic multiple times earlier in the month and kept reiterating that the plan was to get the pgt results and do a transfer in March. I'm happy with the clinical staff and actual treatment but not with the communication and I'm not sure what to do about it.

Obviously not had a response yet from my patient coordinator so I don't know what they are going to say about it either. I can accept that I misunderstood about the thaw and re freeze but I'm certain I checked that the actual biopsy would take place later that same week.

I also had a couple of sleepless night with nerves about the results so it was a big comedown to finally get to that appointment and not even have them.

Hey @Eggling - so sorry to hear you've had this experience. Personally, I think they've massively dropped the ball by not keeping you up to date with the testing plan they decided on - even if you had been told on day 3, you've just been through an egg retrieval, jacked up on hormones and emotions, and it's hardly fair to expect you to be taking everything in at that point.

"I don't like to kick up a fuss generally and I don't want to be a pain in the arse for them, but when I think of eg the work I did as a solicitor, I would follow up my advice to the client in writing where it was significant to the case. I'd also make sure I checked their understanding! We are paying a hell of a lot of money, am I out of line to expect something similar? I know some clinics have portals where you can access your notes, create don't have that."

You are not out of line and you are not a pain in the arse. It's sad that we have to advocate for ourselves in these circumstances but I think you should be proud of yourself for the way that you've handled it. They could so easily have avoided all of this with a simple email and a timeline so that you were all on the same page.

Has anyone replied to you yet? Your patient coordinator sounds like an absolute chocolate teapot.

Thank you @loulamay. We eventually got a reply but literally no acknowledgement that the plan wasn't what we were expecting. We then had to chase for them to send the invoice (!!!) so we could pay and have also had to chase p to get a zoom link for a call with the nurse on Monday. Numerous attempts to reach our patient coordinator by phone with no luck. Then at 4pm today we get an email from her saying that there is a brand new consent form as of today for us to print and sign and send to her to check. We don't have a home printer so Tom replied and said we'd come down and do it now, she said no because embryology need to check it bad they've gone home (erm, didn't mention that the first time?!) then there were emails back and forth until in the end Tom asked if someone else could give him a ring, needless to say no response to that. Been on the phone to the main contact centre in absolute hysterics, they were lovely and I'm expecting a call from the clinic manager on Monday to discuss (let's see if that actually happens). It honestly reached the point today that i felt like they were purposely stalling and must have lost the embryos or something.

I've written down tonight everything that has gone on so i can discuss it with the clinic manager on monday. its such a shame as I've always felt i had a good relationship with the clinic but it's very clear from the patient coordinators emails that she doesn't like us for whatever reason. I literally said to Tom tonight "why doesn't she want us to have a baby?" It's just been so distressing and so totally unnecessary, I just don't understand.

I'm really sorry @Eggling. That's not what you need and frankly they sound beyond useless. I would definitely be making a log of all the issues and taking it to someone senior. It's not fair they can't organise themselves and are creating this extra stress for you. I don't have a patient co-ordinator, I just email our consultant if I have a query. I wouldn't say our clinic is hugely proactive in terms of communication but they've always been very helpful and responsive when I've asked, if that makes sense? Yours definitely sound like they need a bit of a kick!

Thanks @SErunner. I've spoken to one of the nurses this morning and do feel much better. They haven't exactly acknowledged that they fucked yo but they do seem to be pulling out all the stops to make it right. Going in later to sign some final forms and pick up my prescription then starting meds on the bleed due in a couple of days. Plan is to have pgt results back in time to hopefully transfer an embryo (everything crossed we have a Euploid one!) this cycle.

Both embryos aneuploid again. Lots of tears here today.

I'm so sorry @loulamay 😢 lots of tears very understandable, let them flow. Sending huge sympathy and hugs.

@Eggling glad they've pulled themselves together a bit and hope the timelines work out for you 🤞

We were all set to start our next round mid March but today I've had a job offer I don't feel I can refuse. Gah. Why is everything always such bad timing! Doesn't make doing the round a complete no, but if it worked it would be horribly inconvenient timing. Feeling in a right middle now x

@loulamay oh I'm so, so sorry. I wish there was something to say to make it better but I know there isn't. Thinking of you.

@SErunner completely understand. For what it's worth, both of my miscarriages last year were just before (as in a few days before) starting new jobs which I'd applied for and accepted knowing I was about to have a transfer. I hesitated too because of the timing (and obviously it didn't work out anyway) but ultimately decided I couldn't keep putting the rest of my life on hold, and I wasn't willing to delay the ivf, so that was that. People start jobs pregnant all the time, I appreciate it's an extra consideration though. And congrats on the job offer!!

One of our blasts didn't continue growing after the thaw so we had 5 biopsies yesterday. My issue now is that my damn period isn't starting. I stopped the provera tablets a week ago and usually bleed within. 3-5 days. I've had the tiniest bit of brown spotting but nothing. Emailed the clinic this morning to ask what to do. So frustrating though as we've rushed to get everything ready as usual and now my body is messing it up as usual!

Hello everybody, how are you? I've been thinking of you a lot. We got the shock of our lives over Easter weekend with a positive pregnancy test - no IVF. I've not conceived naturally in over 6 years so can't quite believe it and my anxiety is through the roof. Trying to stay positive though - if it finally worked surely it has to be a good egg?! It was good timing - we were due to start our next round this month. I took the new job as well, so that is going to be a fiasco if this all pans out. Sometimes I do feel like the universe likes to play a good practical joke!

@loulamay how are you? Have you gone ahead with any more collections? What did your clinic say?

@Eggling how were the outcome of your tests?

@KLM25 and @IslandsintheOcean hope things continuing to go well for you x

That should read - I've never conceived naturally, in 6 years off contraception.

Wow @SErunner that's amazing, congratulations! How far along are you?

We ended up with 5 blastocysts to test, 4 came back euploid and one no result. I also had a positive test last week, after FET the week before. I'm 5 weeks yesterday and struggling a bit tbh. I'm trying to be positive but very anxious. I think because we don't know for sure what caused the previous miscarriages I'm concerned it's not an embryo issue, but literally nothing has shown up in any of my tests or scans and I'm on steroids and clexane anyway as extra precaution in case it is immunological. Don't have a scan booked until 23rd so just have to take it a day at a time and hope I don't need to be seen before then.

@SErunner wow, congratulations! What a great surprise! I really really hope this is it for you. We haven't been naturally pregnant since 2018 so I know what a shock that would be. Crossing everything for you!

@Eggling tentative congratulations! Really hope this one sticks for you. 4 out of 5 euploid embryos is a really good result! Please can I ask how old you are now? I understand what you are saying about maybe your issues aren't embryo related if you have that high proportion euploid. Which clinic did you go to?

Sorry, I rarely post on here but do follow so don't expect anyone to remember me. Back story: had my son in 2020 after our first fet/2nd transfer. Have been trying for a 2nd and have lost 5 embryos to implantation failure/early miscarriage. At 36 now we are planning our last ec whatever the outcome and will PGTA test if we get anything. Very low amh so this is more for closure rather than expectation of anything working.

Congratulations @SErunner and @Eggling.

I haven’t posted on this threat before. Currently finishing off cycle 3 of embryo batching and hoping for FET after genetic testing. Low reserve (41) otherwise no known issues so far. This will be our second child after conceiving first one without IVF. We will not be doing any more EC regardless of the outcome. Remaining hopeful.

Thanks @Sofie19. I'm 33 and with create. Did our first egg collection at 29 which ended up with 4 blasts, one was my daughter and the others failed to implant. Then two more cycles in between, both with one blast, both miscarriages. We did a few things differently this time including PICSI for sperm selection which potentially made a difference to our numbers. The consultant still thinks it was likely embryo issue as nothing else is showing up, so we'll see.

@Eggling wowee! That's brilliant. The PICSI would make sense as to why you've suddenly got 4 euploid embryos. Had your husband had the DNA test previously? Did you have a good fert rate previously? You are a few years younger than me. On my first round I got 5 blasts but only 1 took, 2nd was last year and I got 3 (still got one left) but doing 1 final collection. Gosh, I really hope this is it for you. Have you got a scan date or bloods coming up? Nothing has showed up for us either other than low amh so I think the PGTA testing will confirm that for us...likely egg quality.

@Sofie19 we've both had kareotyping which was fine, his sperm morphology has been a bit iffy though. I'm hoping it is just that previously we've had bad embryos but who knows! Fertilisation rate has been all over the place, 14/21, 1/2, 1/15 then this last round was 15/22. So the PICSI did seem to make a difference to that but there's honestly not been much rhyme or reason to it! I have a scan booked in on the 23rd provided nothing happens before then so hoping I make it to there (and also absolutely dreading it / terrified). One day at a time at the moment for sure. I found the PGTA testing really stressful but it is some comfort that we know the embryo is viable so I think it was worth it.

ooooh @SErunner and @Eggling HUGE congratulations! Fully understand your anxiety in both scenarios though and hope you're hanging in there. So your scan is 23rd @Eggling - what about you @SErunner ? The waiting game with IVF is so incredibly hard.

We are in Czech again and I have my egg retrieval tomorrow. Scans so far have shown an excellent response to stims given my age (turned 44 in Feb for any newcomers, hi @Sofie19 and @Faith2024 !) and we have 16 follicles at a good size with 4 or 5 that might have caught up by tomorrow.

Then it's the inevitable decrease in the number of mature, number fertilised etc but with the first round of 16 eggs, we ended up with 6 embryos for PGT testing so really hoping we get a similar number this time.

Trying not to think too far ahead but can't help it so have been looking at the DE route if this doesn't work. I don't think any more rounds would be worth it if all the embryos come back as abnormal again - finding it so hard to accept my useless ancient eggs when I don't feel anything like my age and am generally fit and healthy. Biology is a b*tch.

I was so pleased to read your news @SErunner and @Eggling 😊 I fully appreciate how anxious you will both be, hope you’re both ok and as the cliché says, one day at a time. Hope the days fly by until your scans. Will you have any blood tests or will you hold out until the scans?
Hi @Sofie19 and @Faith2024 and I’m wishing you all the very best for your egg collections.
Hi as well @loulamay, excellent news that you are in CR and even better news about your response to the stims - I’m keeping everything crossed that this is your round 🤞🤞🤞

All is good with me, I’m 25 weeks now and we found out that we’re having a little girl 💕
I’ve had every pregnancy ailment under the sun this time round ☺️ I’ve got an NHS physio appt on Tues as I’ve got quite severe hip and thigh pain. Plus I’ve booked in to see an osteopath too to cover all options! It’s been very different to last time when I seemed to breeze through it all, maybe it’s my age! But of course I would endure it all ten times over for the end result, so I’m not complaining 😊 x

Thanks everybody. I've got a scan booked for the week after next when I'll be 7+3. 5+5 currently. I'm trying to stay calm but am just worrying about everything. Today my sickness has disappeared and I've got this odd ache in my pelvis (not cramps as such). But it has been coming and going a bit anyway so trying not to panic. I don't think it started until at least 6 weeks last time, and was horrendous from 7 onwards, so I keep telling myself it's still really early.

Amazing news @Eggling! So pleased for you, and amazing to have all those euploid embryos. Will keep everything crossed for your scan. I'm sure it's your time 🤞

@Sofie19 wishing you much luck with your last round. Do you know when you're going to go ahead? How have you done embryos wise on previous rounds? The round we were planning was going to be our last too - I actually was looking forward to a sense of closure, however difficult it might be.

@Faith2024 welcome. I'm sorry to hear of your troubles. This has been a really helpful place for me to offload at times. Where are you at with your current cycle?

@loulamay so glad things are looking good for you so far this round. Forever hopeful for you. I think DE is a sensible option to consider if you're open to it. It must be a minefield?

@KLM25 so pleased to hear things are going well. A girl - wonderful! You are giving me hope ❤️

@loulamay those are great numbers to more than keep the hope alive.

@KLM25 congratulations on your baby girl. Wishing you a smooth pregnancy. I don’t think I relaxed until about 34 weeks which is crazy.

@SErunner this is my first ever try with IVF. Our plan is to do embryo batching and then PGT-A so I have yet to have a transfer.

My amh is 5.8 and because I have a low reserve it would take me multiple cycles to get to the 10-12 eggs, hence the 3 cycles. This is because we decided from the onset we would give it 3 and draw the line.

We have 8 day 3 embryos frozen.
Cycle 1 we had 5 eggs, 3 frozen.
Cycle 2 we had 6 and 5 frozen.
Cycle 3, currently day 4 of stims with EC for 15th. We are hoping for a couple more given the drop off rate to blastocyst. If we could get 2 good that would be amazing but anything would be good.

Also as I am soon 42 and my main issue being low reserve I just feel at some point the chances of trying naturally will be same as ivf. I could also sleep peacefully knowing we did our best and we are a happy family of 3.

But like I said, I am nothing but hopeful or I wouldn’t have bothered with this all. A bit nervous for PGT-A testing. I know opinion is split on this but for us, being in our 40s it is worth it.

@Faith2024 wishing you much luck for this cycle. How have you found the stims and ECs to date? It's interesting they froze them all at day 3 - is that standard for the batching process you're doing? I've never done any form of batching so don't know much about it. My AMH was similar when last tested 4.5 years ago when we first did IVF to have our daughter and I've followed the stats each fresh round with 6 eggs collected and 1 blast for transfer except for 1 cycle when they grew an extra embryo to day 7 and froze it. Hopefully you will have a good number to test from all your collections. Was it your clinic who suggested PGTA or have you decided to do it? It is a bit controversial I think, but important you do what you feel is right for you.

Hey ladies. I am also following this thread but haven't posted in so long as I just feel a bit out of the ivf loop (have been waiting for my TSH to drop following a spike after my cancelled round in December)

A huge congratulations @KLM25! So lovely to hear your news, I hope you are keeping well! This gives me so much hope ❤️

@SErunner also massive congratulations. I so hope this goes smoothly for you ❤️

@Eggling also huge congratulations. I know how anxious these few weeks can be but I have everything crossed for you 🤞🤞

@loulamay they are great numbers at this stage. I hope this is your round and everything goes to plan🤞

Hi @Faith2024 & @Sofie19 good luck for the upcoming egg collections, I hope they go as well as possible!

No updates from my side really..My TSH has finally returned to normal and now we are just waiting to start our next cycle which will be round 9! The consultant has suggest PRP before we move ahead (not sure what difference it will make but worth a go I suppose) does anyone have experience with it? My little boy is coming 4 in May and I do feel I am moving further and further away from it being a possibility. I had a friend announce her second pregnancy last week with her first coming 2 in September and it hit me really hard. I've been trying to conceive my 2nd longer than it's taken her to fall pregnant, have a baby and fall pregnant with her 2nd. It is all just so hard!!! 😢😢

I have just had my day 5 monitoring scan ans bloods. Things look Ok so far but probably more clarity on Wednesday’s scan.

@SErunner I am grateful to have found the stims and EC very smooth, maybe because my body isn’t producing as many eggs so it’s easier? Who knows. The only side effects were insomnia and bloating towards the end which has been manageable. I found the two weeks before for down regulation on Norethistrone the worst. Constantly on edge it was horrible.

As for genetic testing, it was suggested by clinic but we also felt it was right for us. I know the process isn’t really designed for the way we use it now but I am just conscious that over 40 the chance of chromosomal abnormalities are much higher so felt it may be worth it for us? Or we may have nothing to transfer. It’s probably better suited to people who have many blastocysts. I do feel a little less certain about it than at the beginning but in my core think it may be best for us. I have one more call with my consultant next week before EC and I will also try to chat with one of the embryologist beforehand just to be 💯 certain. What’s your view?

@TTC6 thank you. I hope your next round goes well. It’s hard when others announce pregnancies, hang in there. Two of my closest friends were unable to conceive with one adopting and the other choosing to carry on trying so I have the opposite when I cant really discuss my desire for a 2nd child without feeling guilty or insensitive.

Thinking of you all from my post-surgery haze. 15 eggs collected and all mature which is great news. Now we wait!

That's amazing @loulamay! Such a good start. How are you feeling?

@TTC6 nice to hear from you. I'm sorry it's all taking so long but glad you're back on track now. The time delay is so difficult is it. I have a friend who has had 3 babies in the time we've managed to have 1 (1 'unplanned' to add an extra kick). It just feels so unfair. I don't have any experience with PRP I'm afraid.

@Faith2024 so glad you've not found it too onerous so far. I have been fine with stims and all my ECs too, similarly I think probably because of low egg numbers.

Re PGTA. I'm personally a bit of a stickler for what I can understand to be best practice. HFEA only recommends it in the event of recurrent miscarriage (I'm sorry if that is the case for you). I suppose my worry in your scenario is if you have small numbers you could end up not transferring potentially viable embryos, and possibly none at all? But I can totally understand why people do it. Personally I didn't ever intend to go down that route. It is definitely an individual decision - as I said, I'm not in your shoes and you need to do what's right for you. I trust Robert Winston's view on most things - his website (the genesis research trust) is excellent if you haven't already come across it.