IVF/FET FEB MARCH No 3 2022

[Justawannabemam]

New thread created from previous

@womaninkent & @xreadytoglow thank you 🙏

@IE00 you also have been through a lot... I am
sorry that you have hypothalmic amenorrhea and PCOS at the same time. You have every right to expect to be cured. It is so unfair that we cannot do such a basic thing like being pregnant. Yesterday I was thinking why do I even have a uterus if I cannot get pregnant...

I also want doctors to find the root cause of the failures first and try to fix it before moving forward but unfortunately it is not always possible. We had to pay the coagulation tests and uterine biopsy from our pocket as well because insurances does not agree to pay it unless you have 2 miscarriages 🙄

After the call from the clinic, we basically cuddled and cried on the bed for an hour and shared our frustration. I am more open with my feelings but my husband always needs a little help to express his feelings and cry. After that we talked about our options and the next steps. We went for a short walk and came home to have some wine and comfort food. I also planned some gatherings with our friends for the weekend. We will also try to rekindle our intimacy which was so mechanic in the last 2 years due to obvious reasons...

About strength: Thank you but I don't think I am particularly strong. I just want to have options since I still cannot accept the fact that we might never have a child. I think what helps us is being open to the adoption option also. The age limit in Germany for adoption of a baby or toddler is 40. I will turn 36 and my husband will be 37 in June. The whole adoption process takes about 1,5-2 years so we don't have that much time. I don't want to do another fresh ICSI round and miss our chances for adoption. If the next FET doesn't work and we cannot adopt then the last resort will be using a donor egg & sperm. I think having these options puts my mind at ease.

I think it is great that your husband gives you strength through this hardship. I am sure everyone here was as inconsolable as you were when they get a BFN. Please be gentle to yourself whatever the outcome will be this time💐

Last update from my clinic was that they would consider my pregnancy viable if it was over 60 on Friday. I had a test done with another clinic today and my beta is 60. The other clinic have said that my clinic are incorrect and there is no way this is viable as the levels are just too low and needed to be over 100 yesterday. I’m still stuck in limbo!

@Mochii hasn't that more than doubled since yesterday? It still sounds hopeful to me.

@Cayandsimit wow and to top all of that you are wrestling with your insurance company. Really not the additional stress you need! I'm glad you can support each other and you have options. I am not familiar with adoption but is it possible to start the process now whilst trying so you don't miss the window?

@NaomiNatNat great news!! Keep going :-)

@Mochii sounds very stressful. Why did you get your tests done at another clinic? Fingers crossed your original clinic is wrong!

I had the test done at the other clinic as my clinic don’t answer the phone and I couldn’t get hold of them for 2 days.

It’s tripled in 48 hours. 10dpt was 17, 11dpt was 29, 12dpt was 60

@Mochii wow that's amazing! Sounds very viable to me. Why does your original clinic think otherwise?

My clinic said if it’s over 60 by Friday they would consider it viable. The one today said it’s not viable as it has to be over 100 by 11dpt, even if it hits 100 tomorrow it’s not viable in their eyes. I have seen online other people have low scores and go on to have babies though and the main thing that matters is the doubling. I’m waiting yet again for my clinic to call me back so will see what they say.

@Mochii that makes sense now. Well your original clinic know you better so I'd go with them. Fingers crossed.

@Justawannabemam Thank you ❤ Ive done some stressful hard work past couple of days. I shouldn't have gone back to work so soon, feeling silly! Called my nurse again today she says that it might be anything from working hard to polyps to implantation and so on... All I can do is rest and keep taking progesterone. The bleeding seems to be less than this morning now but will see tomorrow morning. Pray for me 🤞💕 How are you feeling today? Xx

I had a tiny bit of brown spotting yesterday (12 DP3DET). Has IB ever happen to anyone this close to OTD or am I getting AF? It's my first round, not sure what to expect..

Yeh just take it easy @NaomiNatNat .

Have u tested ? When is your OTD your a couple of days behind me aren't you ?

I feel okay . Just a bit sureal really. Keeping my fingers crossed nothing goes wrong. I'll be dying to tell people if it's positive but I think we will wait until 6 weeks to tell close family then 12 for everyone else.

Will my bloods be higher if there are 2 ? My friends are plugging at us to book a holiday for September but I think if we have 2 it will be too risky and near to due date as I've read twins tend to come early.

Hello, I've been hovering over the board since November and finally started my frozen cycle (third ivf, three miscarriages, four years ttc, age 34).

I have to make a decision whether to transfer one or two embryos by next week, and I can't settle on a decision. Some days I'm certain on my decision and then I sway back the other way! I wanted to run it past you all to gather more opinions?

The clinic have said they will allow me two embryos: I don't meet the criteria where they would outright refuse so if I want to, I can.

They obviously highlighted that they follow government guidelines and it's their policy to keep multiple births to a minimum. They also reiterated the risks of a multiple pregnancy.

The reason why I'm considering it because my embryos do not make it beyond 5/6 weeks and so I don't have high hopes for future cycles either. I hope that if I do two, I save myself another cycle: both money and time, if one were to stick!

We are completely open to the idea of twins, but hearing about the risks and reading stuff on the internet makes me fall back again.

What do you think?

Welcome @EasterBunny7! If my clinic had allowed me to transfer 2 then I would have. I don’t think it’s an easy decision though and very much a personal one

@EasterBunny7 hi welcome!

I've transferred 2 . Our clinic recommended it last time which was unsuccessful so this cycle we went in straight away and said if we had 2 we'd transfer 2. I'm 40 so your a few years younger than me. Not that it makes it any easier. 3 cycles is some good going for any woman so your doing great .

How many do you have frozen ?

I would say if you have more than 2 frozen do it. But I don't have time like you do .x

Make a decision and go with it. Don't think about the what ifs.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do. X

@mochii such a stressful situation! I wish you a lot of patience and strength in the following days. I hope it doubles or triples quickly and you won't be in the gray zone anymore 🙏

@IE00 I checked the regional adoption authority's website. It was written that the couples who wish to adopt should make peace with their infertility and made their minds about adoption. Since we have 2 more embryos + 2 fertilized eggs in the cryo, it might be hard for us to prove that we have given up. I just want a consultation appointment first to prepare for the real thing in ~6 months. I will do double transfer in the next round(s) so it won't take long. Honestly, I wouldn't mind if we adopt and then also have a biological child. Having 2-3 children is better than having none anyways 😅 We can take up to 3 years parental leave. First 14 months will be paid and then we can manage with our savings if it comes to that. Anyways, I think I should stop think about 15573836 steps ahead. Having plan B, C, D is a good thing but this much planning is just exhausting 😅
I think I missed your status because we weren't on the same timeline. Are you in TWW or have you not reached that point yet? How are you feeling?

Welcome @EasterBunny7 I was in the same predicament as you and was debating it right up till last week. I’m 34 as well, with one failed fresh cycle but because we have 4 frozen and it’s our last funded nhs cycle our consultant said we can do 2 this time. I had been a bit worried regarding the risks but more just wondering whether I should do it this time and be left with 2 or do one this time and then feel less pressure knowing I’d have 3 left in the freezer. In the end we just thought let’s go for it and we are trying both with an embryo glue add on. I think if you can you should consider it as my confidence went down a lot after the first cycle failed with what they said was a 5AA blastocyst so I just don’t want to give my lining and embryos the best chance. Hope that helps you

Thank you both @Mochii and @Justawannabemam

Do you know, my automatic assumption was that I'd be told I'm too young to risk multiples so I was pleasantly surprised with your support for the idea.

I worry about things like how I might not be built for one baby, let alone two, being a short woman! So many things to worry about!

@easterbunny7 Do you know the reason behind your miscarriages? Is it hypothyroidism or coagulation issues? If you know the reason now and it is fixable with medication and if your embryos are in the same developmental level and have the same quality I would transfer two.

Sorry meant to say I just WANT to give them the best chance 🙈

@Bluehawaii29

Wow, thank you: we seem to have a similar profile. It's really reassuring to know that you are currently undergoing 2 embryo transfers at age 34. I am also lacking confidence in my embryos for similar reasons: my two best embryos at grades AB did not stick. Who's to say that the average ones at B and C will do any better? This is also my final NHS funded cycle so that is factoring in my decision too.

@Cayandsimit

Hi there. So, I had many tests done through the recurrent miscarriage unit and everything came back clean . I do have pcos and endometriosis, which is why I'm struggled to get pregnant naturally, and probably why the IVF embryos don't stick. This time, they are putting me on aspirin, clexane and prednisolone.

I cannot remember the exact gradings of the embryos, but I will be sure to check. Thanks.

@EasterBunny7 yeah it’s so hit and miss isn’t it but there have been a lot of positive stories for double transfers, @Justawannabemam is a good example—you had 2x 4BBs and fingers crossed your embryo/s sticks all the way 🤞🤞
my hope is like you, for at least one of them to stick. They say that sometimes the lining favours one and then helps the other one along as well. One can only dream for something good to happen but I won’t get carried away like I did the first time, no way am I going to succumb to symptom spotting in the 2WW this time. Just trying to practice daily meditation and go with the flow. Luckily my husband is off with me now so will have some company to take my mind off it all but a week today the transfer could be completed which is mind boggling in itself!
Have you thought about using embryo glue or have you used it already

@Bluehawaii29

No, I hadn't considered any add ons, and did not even think they are allowed on NHS. What made you decide on embryo glue?

The double transfer positive stories sound great! I would love to hear more. Are these just on this thread or elsewhere?

@Justawannabemam good luck! I'll be sure to follow your journey, knowing you're doing a double transfer

@EasterBunny7 it was our consultant who said it. We have to pay £250 for the glue but the rest of it is nhs funded so not bad at all. The glue is meant to help the embryos stick. Had a word with the embryologist this morning and she said the same thing. We got consented for it last Friday so just waiting for the go ahead on my scan this Friday. It’s worth seeing what your consultant says about it, especially if you’ve had recurrent miscarriage. They say it really helps a cohort of patients and I think that you would be considered in that cohort