IVF at Guy's & St. Thomas' & general process/timeline part 3

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This is a continuation from the thread "IVF at Guy's & St. Thomas' & general process/timeline discussion" /part 2

@jusstjaee oh no, not you too. When did you get your result? It’s really shit my dude, I only got my negative yesterday and I’m still in a bad way tbh but trying not to let it beat me. But we booked a nice holiday last week because I wanted something to focus on if we got a bfn. I’m going to try to focus on diet, exercise, fitting into my holiday wear a little better and then having a nice time away. Will kill some time between now and the next FET at least and I get a nice week in Cyprus.

@Welshpea I hope you’re right and it’s our year . I went down a rabbit hole earlier on when I googled “first FET failed” and found a woman in 2017 who was at Guy’s too, exact same age as me at nearly 39, but it never worked for her. I convinced myself this is what will happen, it’s really not fun not being able to see beyond this shitty limbo stage.

Yeah, my appointment is scheduled for 24th May. We’re then on holiday early June so I’m guessing the wait might take us to July. I was hoping for June but I knew July was realistic. How are you feeling now?

@thislittlebird I got my result 20th March but new before then as I started bleeding heavily but guys still insisted on me testing which seemed pointless but hey ho!

Honestly wish I had some advice that would make you feel better but I was a complete mess after, only thing I can say is just ride the emotions if you want to cry then bloody cry I tried to hide how I was feeling deep down abut then it just hit me so think this time around will try and do the same as you and look to booking a holiday.

@Welshpea I had my call on the 12th April but haven't heard anything since... The waiting is the worst! How are you feeling going into your FET?

@jusstjaee it's been a little while now so hopefully you're feeling a bit better. I guess some people bleed in pregnancy so they want to be sure. The pregnancy tests they gave me were crap, all the others I did were very white but theirs were weird with what looked like two lines for a while and then kinda dried to one. I knew it had failed when I got my pre-menstrual migraine.

Yeah the holiday is a win-win. If it's negative you get a week away to chill out and maybe have a drink and nice food, if it's positive you get a week away to celebrate??? We booked a cute villa with a private pool to get away from all the annoying people. Glad it's booked so I'm not just floating along miserably until July.

How did your appointment go, what did they say? I'm hoping it's constructive but I'm expecting them to say it's my age and embryos :/

@thislittlebird feeling a lot better from the negative but just feeling frustrated with the waiting and anxious for the next transfer incase it doesn't work again but trying to remain positive.

Your holiday sounds amazing and I really hope you have a nice relaxing time and come back feeling refreshed ready for your next transfer. Definitely think I am going to book somewhere as like you said it's a win win

The call literally lasted less than 10mins and I guess was positive but just frustrating in the sense that I don't really have an answer as to why it may not have worked except it just wasn't our time this round. He said that everything throughout the cycle went well and there's nothing they would suggest changing and said it's not a case of it happens but when it happens and I really hope that is the case.

I read somewhere before that with your first round it's more like a trial round as they are kind of guessing what doses etc you should have so hopefully for the next round they will have more of an idea for you or it may be a case like where on paper it was picture perfect and just didn't work this time but really hoping like @Welshpea said this year is our year ✨

@jusstjaee it's so hard. I'm already worrying about what happens/how I'll feel if all of mine fail to implant. I can't help but wonder if I'm to blame, you know? It's tough, and very unfair and unlucky how it works first time for some but often it doesn't for the rest of us.

Yes, definitely do! I'm distracting myself with swimming costume shopping. Not sure I can do this after every transfer lol, but it's happening after this failed one.

10 mins? Sheesh, that feels brief when you have to wait so long for it. Are they making any changes? I'm hoping I'm on of the people who has success with their lower grade embryos, rather than their best ones, I guess. :/

@jusstjaee I'm feeling okay and suprisingly hopeful too which after the last time i dirnt think i would be. I really feel the thickness of my lining was the issue last transfer so i'm just doing everything i can to try to prepare so it's perfect this time. So i'm fingers crossed 🤞 I'm just really nervous about the progesterone injections - il be fine when we start it but i hate the build up thinking about it!!

@thislittlebird so jealous of your holiday! We haven't got anything booked ! need to sort something out :) I'm with you i only have 2 embryos left now and they will be lower grade than the others although i don't know if they re grade them when they unfreeze and watch them again to make sure they are ok because they last one that was put in definitely wasn't the grade i got told initially from egg collection !

@thislittlebird I totally agree and think the same as recently friends just seem to be dropping baby announcements every second and I just keep thinking why is it so hard for me and yet seems so easy for everyone else!

No they're not changing anything for my next round so feeling really anxious tbh. I'm not sure what my gradings were but happy I don't know as I think that would make me overthink more.

@Welshpea is there still injections with FET?? Thought I never had to do them again lol. I think mine may be implantation but how would I know? Will this be your first FET?

@jusstjaee nope with FET no injections normally.
Just Oestrogen from day 2/3 and then nothing in theory until 5 days before transfer where you do progesterone pessaries twice daily.

I had more than that on my FET as my lining was thin. So i did Oestrogen from day 2/3 then at my first scan they prescribed me estrogen patches to help build the lining then pessaries as normal

This time we are adding in the injection to help support the lining - as that's what the consultant thought would be best.

This will be my second one :)

I have my scan on 27th May so i'm so hoping that my lining will be thicker than last time! it was only 4.4 at the first scan so anything higher than that il be happy with! hoping it was just an off month 🤞

@Welshpea did they tell you why you need progesterone injections? Definitely get something booked! I've got swimming costumes coming today and it's the only thing keeping me sane tbh, having something nice to try on soon.

Was this your second or first transfer? I can't remember. I think the one that just failed for me was 4AA and they were super excited to tell me it thawed 100% in tact and kept developing, and it still didn't work. The grades clearly mean very little, just want them to survive the thaw :/

I don't know whether to discuss doing two at some stage, or just do one at a time because I don't know if I have some sort of implantation issue yet. I don't want to 'waste' two, if that makes sense? I have three left now, a 3AA, a 3AB and a 5AC. I'm considering doing another EC privately if I have a second failure, I'm 39 in a few weeks.

@jusstjaee I'm really tired of all the pregnancies. One people are pregnant it flies by, and I'm still sat around doing my transfers or more ivf rounds.

I did a natural FET so I didn't have oestrogen. Don't really want to do a medicated because I get hormonal migraines. My lining was fine, 7.7mm before ovulation so more than that by the time I ovulated, so I can't even say that's the reason :/

Can't say I love how long the wait is. I'm literally ageing here, hoping I can do a FET early July or late June instead of late July. Longer still would be very triggering.

@thislittlebird yeah he did so i had a hysteroscopy in november after my fresh transfer to check everything was okay and they found scarring. After we struggled to get the lining thick on my fet he thinks even though they removed the scarring it is possibly deeper and cannot be treated and we'll never know if it's there or not. That's why he wants the extra progesterone by injection as he's hoping if we can get the lining thick enough then we may get a higher chance of implantation

i'm hoping his suggestion works!

@thislittlebird I'm sure I read from someone else in another thread that their wait wasn't long but I feel like I have been waiting forever. Don't get me wrong I am so grateful that I have been given the opportunity via NHS but I guess the con is wait times. I'm guessing with private you may be able to try again sooner after a failed?

All the way through my treatment I was just told everything looks good so don't know what my lining was or what grading my embryos were but the same as you I have 3 left so one will obviously not be funded, although me and my partner have both agreed we will be happy to put two back and for us likely twins may occur as we both have twins on our side but I think after how long it's taken us with the first and still nothing I would be more than happy to have twins as this will probably be our only given age and if we were to experience the same struggle again.

Did you swimming costumes come? I spoke to my friend last night who just got back from Greece and we're looking at booking somewhere late June/ Early July and I'm already excited lol

@Welshpea that sounds very promising and I hope by introducing the injection this time too makes all the difference. I think I would feel a little better if they were introducing something new for my next cycle but to know they're not isn't giving me much hope but then on the other hand I keep telling myself that everything must of gone well last time which is why they're not and it was just bad luck. But I do feel my issue could be implantation but guess they wouldn't really start to look into that unless I had more failed cycles.

@jusstjaee I think welshpea said that, and then the clinic said the same thing to me that the wait time isn’t bad. But it feels pretty long still that I get a negative on May 1 and can’t transfer to possibly the end of July, depending on when AF resets to. It’s cycle day one today, which is somehow a relief? Feels like I can start to move on again. I think private should be faster, wondering if I can pay for one of mine to speed it up after this one? Trying to think of ways to make it all faster.

They never told us gradings either, and then I was in an appointment one of the nurses said “oh you have great embryos” and I asked then. Our “greatest” one was a flop, let’s hope the less great are better lol.

I would be fine with twins, we’re 39 and 41 this year, I would like to get it out of the way. How old are you and your partner? But a woman on another thread put two back and got three for the price of two 😂😭. Triplets would scared the crap out of me, not sure we could afford it. And obviously all the risks that come with it etc are a worry.

Amazing, you should definitely book! My costumes came and they were hit and miss so I’ve ordered more and returned them lol. I did like one lovely one with an oranges print from John Lewis though. A really lovely blue and white maxi skirt from Joules arrived today, I’m looking forward to wearing it. Also a good excuse for me to lose a few pounds I’ve gained over the whole infertility process, I weigh more than I ever have. Maybe that will help too, who knows.

@Welshpea totally agree with jusstjaee about the change being a good thing. Hopefully it’ll do the trick for you. The one good thing is this next appointment is an opportunity for me to raise concerns with a doctor, which I never had the chance to before. Because of my hormonal migraines I’m not happy being shoved on the standard protocol so I would like a better plan this time. A natural modified cycle or something, because I want to avoid oestrogen but I need progesterone because that’s been low in the past. This cycle was natural but I still needed progesterone and no one mentioned it so I had to raise it on the day of transfer. They didn’t realise I needed it, but I’ll be more aware this time and will be taking it pre-transfer.

Hello can I join? I've just had my transfer at Guys this morning. Is anyone else in the 2ww? I'm 32, this is my second FET. The embryologist today told me the grade, which I'm sure some people want to know but it has given me a lot of anxiety. Does anyone know how much this counts? I was really looking forward to this today but now feeling very down after my FET 😥

Also just reading the thread. I am at Guys as a self-funded patient and the wait time is just as long / short. I waited a total of 7 weeks from failed transfer mid-Feb to starting oestradiol. I waited 2 weeks for my follow-up, 3 weeks to be given an appointment, had the appointment 1 week later for a scan and collect my drugs, then 1 week on norethisterone to induce a bleed. Whatever the wait, it's awful, I feel your pain. Hope that helps.

@IE00 welcome! I don't think any of us active on here are in the 2ww, we're all in the failed FET/waiting for next one phase. I wouldn't worry about the grade, they're mostly graded for freezing/thawing purposes rather than baby making. I had a 4AA and it thawed 100% in tact and kept developing and yet it still failed so don't fret about the grades.

If Guys had a quicker option I'd use them for our next private round when these embryos are used up, but they don't so there's little point because speed will be of the essence for me, I'm 39 this month.

@thislittlebird thanks for the reassurance. I thought you might be interested to know that I am self-funded but there is another option, to be "private". The difference is you get the same consultant throughout, you have a private line you can call and it's I think 50% more. I didn't know the difference until I called this private line and was told politely it's not for me, even though I'm paying 🙄. It's weird they never suggested that option to me when we had our consultation, maybe because I came from the NHS but had used up my NHS allowance as I already had a baby there. I would have paid 50% more to be able to talk to someone and get things moving more quickly!

@IE00 I remember someone on this thread mentioning it before, but I didn’t understand the difference between that and self funded. How strange that they have a paying nhs service and then a private private service. 50% more on everything? Hmmmm. I’m struggling to decide where to go next and when to do it. Because of my age I want to do another collection sooner rather than later, and I can’t decide if to do that after a second failure or wait a bit longer (I had 4 embryos, 1 has failed so I now have 3). I don’t want to hand over thousands only for one of my Guys four to work, I’m wondering if I could pay Guys the “private” price to speed up my last transfer/s?

So is this your second ivf if you already have a baby? Seems strange they wouldn’t raise it as an option.

@thislittlebird I'd go private for the last transfer if you can afford it. I had a taste of it and it really is a lovely service. I've been with guys via NHS since April 2019 for various fertility treatments and what was worse for me was the actual waiting in the waiting room to be seen, sometimes I'd be waiting 45 mins because they were "running late", but couldn't be arsed to say anything. It's gotten better, ironically post pandemic, but I don't know if you've visited the pharmacy, I waited 1.5 hours last time for my medication "due to staff shortages". Basically what I'm saying is private might be nice but I'm not sure whether it would solve my own experience of waiting.

What's your reservation with doing your EC at Guys? I'd say better the devil you know

Yes I had

Also sorry just re reading. If you have 3 embyros left you're almost certainly guaranteed a baby from one of those, statistically speaking? Are you thinking siblings?

It’s not 50% more I don’t think- it definitely wasn’t double the self funded option price. That’s what I did and we went for first consult in Feb and had ET in April. Personalised care is great- straight in and we were seen on a weekend, any time we needed to be. Same doctor throughout and he did our egg collection and ET.

Basically yes it is more expensive but you’re paying for the one to one service. But both price lists are on the website so I think the pricing is quite transparent, just what you get that’s different isn’t that clear.

@Iwouldlikesomecake I looked at price lists with a focus on FET and it looked like £200 difference between self-funded and private? Won't pretend to understand the prices but I'm wondering if I could pay them to get through at least one (my unfunded NHS one) more quickly? If I do a natural cycle, which is my preference, then I don't need a big gap, surely?

@IE00 We've saved for it so we have the money. The debate I'm having is whether to get another EC underway if I have second or third FET fail so that I have a more eggs removed while I'm still nearer 39 than 40? Or just go through my remaining 3 and then do it?

I've really liked Guys and would happily do another EC there. My concern is the waiting, and cost. If I do it again and it takes a number of attempts it adds up per FET, whereas if you get an Access package with a different clinic it might work out cheaper because you get two EC cycles and unlimited transfers. But I don't know if I'm happy to handover £10k plus (or less if I stick with Guys) before I've used up my remaining three, I don't think I am, and I don't want to wait three months for every transfer, I'm too old.

And no, not thinking siblings, I'm just concerned it won't work because of my age and all three left will fail. I feel like I'm going to be one of the unlucky ones, as such. Was your first baby via IVF?

I think I've been really lucky, I've always been called straight in to my appointments, never had to wait except the very first time we were seen my the trainee doctor to agree protocol. Every time since then has been quick. All of this has been since August though. I have indeed been to the pharmacy! What a treat that was! I said to work I'm just "popping" to Guys to get a prescription one lunch time, I didn't come back for hours 😂

@thislittlebird I see where you are coming from but for your age, according to the FET leaflet I was given, you have a 37% chance of a single pregnancy per embryo transferred. That being said I know it's not a rational decision and do see the risk of drifting into paying loads for more rounds. I think if you like Guys though, they know you and your body, I'd personally stick with them.

Might be worth talking so one of their consultants about the decision to do another EC now Vs FET?

@thislittlebird and yes first baby was IVF with Guys, transferred on the second day of lockdown march 2020. I distinctly remember the nurse said they were going to be deployed from the next day onwards to work on the Covid wards. All very grim. I was lucky it worked first time (FET as they froze all of mine due to OHSS). I say lucky but my first cycle lasted 5 months long for various administrative and physiological reasons.

In all honesty I'd look at going for personalised care if the only reason that you have to wait is 'waiting lists' and you can afford it. The 'self funded' option is cheaper but you are in with all the NHS funded people, you don't skip the queue just because you're paying which is why it's the cheaper option. Personalised care is the true private care option. But, you do get really lovely care from the consultants when they are giving you one to one care - that was my experience anyway.

I need to go back for my follow up and see what we do. I have hit the gym hard though because I'm a stone and a half heavier than I want to be and I feel horrible, some of that is pandemic and some of it is because I felt so dreadful through IVF the only way to function was to eat - because I didn't want anyone to know what was going on :(

@Iwouldlikesomecake glad you had a good service with personalised care. I just wanted to clarify that I said 50% more, not double (which would be 100% more), which you had suggested I said. I was told this on the basis that there were likely to order additional blood tests and scans, which would add to the cost. But glad your costs were less.

The waiting seems to be another awful side effect of the pandemic. As when I had my first IVF in 2019 there was no wait. Mind you, the waiting list now is only 2 weeks, it's just that I had to wait 2.5 weeks for my follow up, before I could be added to the waiting list. Did you have to wait for your follow up with personalised care? That would halve the total wait time if that wasn't the case.

I'm sorry you've gained weight, it's awful when you aren't feeling your best.