Anyone doing IVF at 40+ pt 2

[lucymills1234]

Setting up a new thread as the old one was nearly at the limit.

@Anxiousbuthopeful
@Islandstars
@Woodcottage1
@Unicorn9
@SerenditySunshine

@LouScot I'm so sorry to hear that options are limited. Would you consider going abroad? I know it adds more variables and stress, but I found that the clinic in Spain had other suggestions and protocols to try than what I was offered here in Ireland, and so far I've done better in my 2 cycles there at 41 than I did at 39 & 40 here.

@Lulu106 oh that's tough. I got that donor egg recommendation too - after 3 failed cycles. Its such a blow, especially when you arent ready to hear it.

We have MFI (subpar motility and morphology) and so before going down the donor route we pushed for a DNA fragmentation test to find my husband had 49% fragmentation! Turned out they kept blaming my old eggs, but donor egg may not have helped much. In our case, we were "lucky" in that they discovered my husband had a varicocele that could be embolised - I know that doesn't always end up being the case.

@Nessylink Snap. We have MFI and OH has varicocele but he didn't want to get it removed as my clinic have not massively pushed it. His morphology has increased but still low. We haven't done the DNA fragmentation yet. It could all be the answer but this may push him over the edge.

@Nessylink can I ask which Spanish clinic are you with?

Yeah, it certainly was a blow to my hubby too.
We are with IVF Spain Madrid. We did a video chat with them and were impressed with some of the suggestions/things they picked up on. We are in Spain because they offer sperm sorting to help cut down on DNA fragmentation.

Thanks @Nessylink we have a consultation with Clinica Tambre in Madrid next week.
I just received an official letter from our current clinic. About 3 sentences long which basically says our miscarriage was likely genetic, we would be looking for other fertility options and they could offer us a counselling session. £20,000+ for a counselling session is quite expensive!

Hello

How is everyone?
@Hopeful199 how's fet preparation going?
@October1979 are you on track for your fet? I've lost track of when it was going to be!
@LouScot I'm so sorry your cycle was cancelled. It's just so hard when you get your hopes up each time that this might be the one.
@Nessylink hope your stims are going well! How many embryos do you have banked so far? Interesting that your cycles in Spain have been more successful. What have they done differently?

On my side, my 4th ivf cycle was a dud. We transferred 3 not very good quality day 3 embryos and had no success. I feel like this is the end of the road for own eggs so have started looking into donor eggs. They told my oh his sperm was "optimal" after his dna frag test so its definitely my eggs that are the issue. We have a consultation lined up with the London egg bank but they just sent me through some educational videos and they're just making me more depressed that it isn't going to happen with my own eggs. Plus the due date of the baby we miscarried in March is now coming up.....@October1979 how did you get your head around it? Did you have counselling? I'm thinking I might need some. It's a lot to process...

@99pctpractice I'm sorry your last cycle wasn't successful. The pain of this journey is unreal. I've recently spoken to some people who finally decided on donor eggs and they don't regret their decision. Give yourself some time to reflect. 🌈💕

@99pctpractice im so sorry to hear your cycle didn’t work. I think it’s good to be able to make peace that you tried everything you possibly could and can now consider your next steps fully. It is so tough though.

I had my scan yesterday and all looked good apparently so the FET is booked for next Friday. This is my last emby so really trying to stay calm and positive for the possibly of a good outcome 🙏🏻🌈

@Lulu106, I get it! We spent €29k in Ireland for 3 rounds of PGTA IVf with nothing to show for it.
We actually really liked Tambre. Did you have a video consult with Dr. Alicia? She was great, although she did shock us a bit talking about needing to think about donor eggs... but I did appreciate her honesty, and I'd say after 3 failed rounds she wasn't necessarily wrong to broach the subject. We almost chose Tambre, it was a hard choice. I'd say they are a good clinic.

@99pctpractice, sorry the cycle didn't go well - successive negatives are hard to manage, be kind to yourself. I too know of people who who moved on to donor conception and are happy with that choice. I do think we mentally have to work through all this crap to finally get to the right place in our minds to be willing to entertain that next step. It is a process, and I do think there are added complexities with donor conception that counseling is probably a really good idea . We have 10 embryos banked, absolutely delighted. Now, only 1 in 7 was euploid for us last time, so who knows what we end up with, but I'm hoping there are 1 or 2 good ones in there that we make it to transfer! They put me on metformin, switched my medication and offer sperm selection. My hubby also had a varicocele embolised in Feb and was put on low dose clomid (which our Irish clinic never bothered to find out about) - not sure what did the trick, but the combo was good for us!

@Nessylink thanks for your reply. Can I just clarify (sorry still got soppy brain) that you went with your clinic over Tambre because they were still willing to try your eggs and Tambre only suggested donor? And you've managed to bank lots of embryos?
I suspect Tambre will recommend donor eggs for us. My partner is not ready for that yet and I don't think I am either.
I don't think our sperm issues have been completely explored and OH hasn't had varicocele embollised. DNA frag test might be useful. We have an appointment with ARGC too. Feel we need to explore all options at this point.

@Lulu106, Honestly, it was very hard to choose. We really liked Tambre Madrid we even went there for initial tests. Yes, we were a bit taken aback they suggested donor and we weren't mentally there yet, but they did also asj for DNA frag, suggested my husband should get his varicocele embolised because it could help -- and when we said we wanted to try our own eggs one more time they were happy enough to go along with that in our situation. They have a beautiful facility with private waiting rooms.

But, we had to choose one clinic, so in the end we chose IVF Spain Madrid (previously Procreatec), because they seemed just as good, but a bit less expensive. We "clicked" a bit more with our coordinator there and while Tambre charged us €500+ for pre-tests, IVF Spain only charged us €20 and waived the rest. It just gave us a a better feeling, but honestly we would have been happy to go with Tambre as well. Now, I heard prices may have gone up since as they are more & more integrated with IVF Life group that acquired them, so not sure if that is the same advantage as before. You could do a consult with IVF Spain for comparison just to give you another point of reference.

Thanks @Nessylink really appreciate this. I'll private message if ok? Please ignore if not x

@Lulu106 Happy to chat :)

@Hopeful199 wishing you a sticky and strong emby for FET!!! Have everything crossed for you 🤞🤞

Thanks @Nessylink

Started the prog again today…. Forgot how much the lubion stings!!! Hopefully all worth it in the end though!!!

I am on this journey too and hope it’s ok to join. I’ve been following for a while and wishing you all the best. It’s very hard to keep going, especially this week (2 years of TTC, 2 miscarriages down and dreading the estimated birth anniversary next month, 6 assisted ovulation failed rounds and 2 failed IVF rounds down). Wishing you all the best for your next steps. We have used 2 other clinics. If anyone has any thoughts on Create Wimbledon/ Mild IVF I would really appreciate it. Thank you

I meant to say I’m considering them as have read they suggest/ are experienced in Mild for those over 40 and where standard IVF has failed. Thanks again

Hi @Grateful03 Im 41 (almost 42) and did a cycle with Create in June but miscarried.
Were your two cycles with fresh transfers?
I can help if you have any questions.

@birdbybird thank you. I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. It’s the worst worst thing and I hope you are recovering ok. On our first round the embryos didn’t pass the screening. On the second I did a transfer and it didn’t take sadly. I’m devastated as that was our real hope as it used younger eggs I’d frozen. We’ll be starting from scratch. Were you happy with them and did they tailor your protocol based on info you gave? I did a consultation with them a few years ago then ended up going elsewhere as they seemed quite unprofessional I.e discussing cases in earshot of the waiting room but I’ve been told they’ve really improved since then. Thanks so much

Everything I’ve read about fertility in the last 2 years since TTC has been pretty bed upside down so I’m resetting and trying to move forward. Our chances with the younger eggs weren’t successful and our older ones, 3.5 years older from my 40s, were better quality. Also I know around 6 people who’ve got pregnant naturally between 43-46 with little effort, all those I know who’s told they’d struggle conceived immediately, and all of us who’ve had every test on the planet snd told we’d be fine are childless. So I’m open to advice!! Thank you

After looking at UK based clinics and the cost, we are currently looking into Greece for the third cycle of IVF. We have shortlisted New Life, Serum, and Embryolab. Any recommendations or advice for these three would be appreciated. We're also open to other clinics in Greece. DH is nearly 44 and I'm nearly 43 and would like to use own egg/sperm.

Hello everyone, mind if I join you? I am 46 (ack!) and single (ack, again). I am looking at donor embryo clinics in Spain right now. I have been following your stories and crossed my fingers, I have hoped for you all, and felt sad when things have been disappointing. Sending you all lots of baby dust. x

Morning All!

welcome to the group @Greenlee. I’m so sorry, I don’t know anything about clinics abroad… but there are lots of lovely ladies on here that will so hopefully they will be able to make suggestions.

@Grateful03 How are you doing? It’s slouch a tough journey and I feel like straight answers and good information are hard to come by! Have you made a plan yet?

I had a transfer Friday so am currently PUPO. Everything looked lovely and went really smoothly so am trying to be super hopeful that this could be the one. I have been here a few times now though and this is my last emby from this batch but we will see. I am one of the ones that look good on paper @Grateful03 but they haven’t stuck yet. Fingers crossed this one is golden 🌈

hope you’re all ok, whatever part of the journey you are on xx

Morning all, we will be persevering although I still don’t understand why the younger eggs weren’t better quality as that’s what every clinic tells us is the case.
Good luck with your transfers.
In the meantime I’m having to avoid pregnant friends as it’s just too hard sadly

I think there are some other threads on foreign clinics so they may help

@Hopeful199 congratulations on being pupo!! All fingers crossed that this is the one for you 🤞

Hi @Grateful03 ! I haven't been to create, but for my third ivf round we tried lower stims (because I wasn't sure if the higher stims were contributing to lower embryo quality and a lot of what create were advocating for made sense to me). But I wound up with less eggs and still not great quality. So I think if you are only going to produce 1 or 2 eggs anyway, then it is a good route to go down (because there's no point being pumped full of drugs if they aren't going to increase the number of eggs anyway), but otherwise ivf is such a numbers game (esp after 40 when not many are going to be chromosomally normal) that it's potentially better to go with higher stims and hope for more eggs and a better chance at the embryo lottery. Does that make sense?

Hi @Greenlee I haven't done much research into overseas clinics, but I did look at donor eggs from vitanova in Copenhagen (because I'm fair with blue eyes so thought we'd be more likely to find a match there than Southern Europe) and someone I know is going to Ivi life in Alicante, which apparently has a better success rates than the uk and a bigger pool of egg donors. I think it can work out cheaper as well, but it might not be that significant after you have factored in transport, accommodation etc. donors are anonymous though, which may or may not be a downside (if we go ahead, I don't want an anonymous donor, but I know it's a very personal choice).