Continued chat of all things IVF, FET & to feel sane...cycle buddies August/September -

[Bluemeadowbaby]

Hey ladies ☺️

A new thread to continue the one we've maxed out from the FET cycle buddies May/June. Anyone wishing to join no matter what stage you're at we're here to support you along the way.

A little background around me - I have a little boy who's 16mo from my second IVF round in 2019. I'm just embarking (restarting after covid setback) on my first FET cycle with the embryos I have in storage in the hope for baby #2 🤞🏼
I have severe endometriosis, hydrosalpinx tubes which have been removed so my only hope is for IVF to work again. It's been a long old journey but if I can give any hope, faith and a tonne of support to anyone who needs it I'm happy to share my story, updates on my cycle and be there to have a general chin wag ☺️

We've got this! ✨ x

I’ll take that @2mumlife - dates through yesterday so all being well with my next period, lining scan 9th June and transfer some time on/after the 14th. Cannot be arsed telling work, cannot be arsed dealing with work, would prefer to live in a cave by the sea with no news and nobody needing me to give a toss about their trivial nonsense until it’s all over. Is that a thing my GP can prescribe do we think?! 🤣

@Verbena87 I wish GP could prescribe that! Do you need to tell work? Dates sound great, keeping everything crossed for you

@2mumlife I’ve told work, I do need to because clinic isn’t local so I need a whole day off for lining scan and another whole day for transfer, alas. Plus we are due Ofsted any day and I am faintly hoping the head will steer them away from my room if she knows I’m already slightly fried in the brain.

hope the heartburn isn’t too brutal and life is calm your end.

@Verbena87 Ah ok, thats a pain. Hopefully they can keep Ofsted away as you say! Heartburn seems so much better again recently thank goodness :)

Hi ladies! So sorry I've been awol! Life has become so very bloomin hectic and quite frankly I can't tell my head from my arse atm 😂 the house purchasing is well under way tho we've hit a little hurdle with bloody damp! Urgh. Life. Why is it always complicated?! I swear I bring drama on by my own doing 😄
@Verbena87 great to hear you're getting going again!! Wishing you the very best of luck! I know it's hard to not want to share especially with work, but I hope they're supporting you as much as possible and praying for you this time round is the round!
@2mumlife ahhh the heartburn! 🤢 I remember I got it so bad with my boy I woke up in the night with puke in my mouth it was horrible! However! If the rennies aren't working, omeprozol (spelling?!) was my best friend! No more heartburn with those babies included in my daily routine!
I'm having a bit of a weird time. The ivf thing has gone out the window atm, the house is full focus which I'm really enjoying embracing - despite it being an absolute ballache, it's a nice distraction and definitely something I want to do first before going again - but the other thing is since I've been back on the progesterone only pill I have not stopped spotting and then last week boom! A huge period which just seems to be coming out like a tap still! Now I know I need to not look at Google, but I'm panicking something serious is wrong! I'm in no pain thank goodness but blood is just a no from me. I have some tests and smear booked in for 23rd even tho I'm up to date I just want to check. I also have a follow up scan that the clinic requested for the cysts on my ovaries on 31st. So hopefully I'll get a few answers as to what's going on. I'm hoping it's just a shift in hormones but all this bleeding isn't half draining me - excuse the pun 😄🙈 x

@Bluemeadowbaby good luck with house stuff - I hate it all so much, never want to move again 🤣

I had a really similar time with the minipill: was on it for years pre-baby with no breakthrough bleeding at all, then went in for a bit post baby and it was fine, then suddenly started bleeding nonstop on it. We didn’t ever find a cause but I switched to the combined pill and it stopped, then came off the pill because pretend estrogen is a headfuck and periods back to normal - have had two normal smear tests in that time too, so I really do think it can just be one of those hormonal things. Hope you get sorted soon.

Thanks for the good wishes. I’m bringing it tbh.

@Bluemeadowbaby Annoying to hear about damp, but it can be really good as you say to have something else to think about for a bit :) Sounds like its probably just hormonal changes - was speaking to a colleague whose just gone on HRT after having insomnia for 4 years due to the menapause. It never stops for women does it!?

Hello ! How is everyone?
Just wanted to say hi and let you know that I am feeling a bit better but the last 6 weeks have been incredibly hard as I think you can imagine. Not only because of IVF failure but also because of a lot of other unlucky events. There hasn't been a day in which I haven't cried but I am taking a step at time and it's much better now.
I went for my follow up consultation last week and my doctor confirmed that all my eggs were of a terrible quality, weird shape and with no polar body. He really seems to think it's a genetic problem and he never saw such a big number of abnormal eggs in a cycle. I am trying to come to terms with it and try to figure out what to do next, if I want children and how to make them 😊

How is everyone else? @2mumlife when is your baby due? Do you know the gender?

@Francesmalin I'm sorry to hear you've had other difficult events happening as well - sounds like life just needs to give you a break for a minute. I'm also sorry the consultant appointmnet wasn't more positive - but I guess in some ways, at least you know where you stand now, and you can make more informed decisions going forward. Its such an investment doing fertility treatment, and must feel so frustrating when you get thrown a curve ball like this. Sending you positive vibes whilst you take some time to decide where to go from here.

We decided not to find out the sex, as there are so few "surprises" in this fertility journey. Though our NHS board also wont tell you at the 20 week scan so would have had to pay for a private scan to find out. My IVF due date should by the 8th September, but the NHS moved it forward to the 5th at the 12 week scan based on measurements which is all they seem to actually care about for their algorithm

Oh @Francesmalin it sounds like it’s been truly shit, give yourself plenty of time and kindness. I’ve found the clinic’s counselling service surprisingly helpful in just coping with it all, have you accessed any counselling? Might be useful as you figure out your next steps, whatever they may look like.

I’ve paid for my cycle and medication, and arranged for drugs to be delivered next week in plenty of time. Swinging between feeling numb and feeling sad/scared. Am I meant to be excited?

@2mumlife we opted not to find out the sex either and I’d do the same again I think. I didn’t have a preference (except: alive, healthy) but was really sure he was a girl and remember thinking “hang on, what?!” when he was born. Took us 5 days to find him a name as I hadn’t properly thought about boy-names 😂.

Yeah, I had a bit of rough and shit time but hopefully it will get better! I am trying at least but I know it will be a lot of ups and downs! I am looking at doing some counseling and I am waiting for the therapist to schedule an appointment with me and bf. This week I feel much better though which is good!

Yesterday I went to do some acupuncture and while I was telling the guy what I have been through he was like "no renergise body, then we look after your eggs so they can mature. People fail IVF then come and see me and get pregnant in 6 months!"! It put a smile on my face although I will need to see my genetic test results first! Did I tell you about the test?

@Verbena87 when are you starting the cycle?
@2mumlife good decision! We all wait until September until baby2mumlife arrives!

Have a good week!

@Verbena87 I think its really normal to feel a bit numb or apprehensive rather than excited. I think once you've been through a few cycles, you just dont get your hopes up any more. I found the Mindful IVF app good for coming to a more peaceful / accepting-but-hopeful place during cycles, so might be worth a try. I think there are pros and cons of each sex lol I did have some internal sense of 'boy' early on, but after the 20 week scan (where they didn't say anything, but didn't hide anything) I wasn't convinced I'd seen anything between the legs so now my bet is on 'girl'. Which is frustrating because for awhile we'd sort of settled on a front runner for a girls name, but then I checked the registry of names for last year for Scotland and the name we liked is in the top 4 girls names last year, and we really don't want to go with a super common name (I have a super common girls name from the 90s) so now we're a bit back to the drawing board.

@Francesmalin I did accupuncture during my last egg collection. I did have a bit of a better result second time around, but we also changed my protocol entirely (first time 4 eggs collected, 2 mature, both made high grade blasts but a BFN and a CP; second time 6 eggs collected, all mature, all made it to day 5 but only 3 were suitable for freezing (freeze-all cycle) and first tranfer worked). Mostly I just found it quite relaxing, and more like I was working with my body. I felt a lot more emotionally stable during that egg collection round than the first time too. Whats the genetic test you're having done? I don't think you've mentioned that.

I'm 24 weeks this week, which is the point where fetus would have a fair chance of surving if delivered, and I still can't quite believe we made it to this milestone

I have taken part of a study that is analysing genetic sequence and correlation with unexplained infertility. My consultant found this study taken in Scotland and asked me if I want to partecipate so we can check if my issue with immature and abnormal egg is due to a genetic mutation or just bad luck!

Well done for getting so far with the pregnancy! So happy for you

@Francesmalin That sounds really interesting. Hopefully it might give some answers, and solutions, to others experiencing something similar in the future x

@2mumlife that’s useful to know about mindful ivf app, I wasn’t sure as it seemed quite fresh-transfer focused, might give it a try now.

Also wondering if we have the same name, though I don’t mind mine being common - I like the meaning and it fits. Our little one has ended up with a name that wasn’t common when we were little (and I’d never taught one in our thousands-strong secondary), but seems to be really common in his age group - oops! 🤣

@Francesmalin that sounds super interesting!

@Verbena87 I paid to unlock all the programs (it wasn't much) - there is one specifically to follow for FET tranfers, the TWW and (keeping everything crossed for you!) the first trimester. I'm a Hannah - loads of us kicking about.

Ah, no, I’m Aimee (my school English class had 2 Hannahs and a trio of differently spelt Amy/Aimees).

will have a look. I think I’m mostly in denial still at the moment tbh - focussed on the garden: my gorgeous peonies burst into blossom while I was at work today so got home to this loveliness…

Funny enough I am an Hannah too !!!

@Verbena87 @Francesmalin See, loads of Hannah's lol. I would have said Aimee wasn't too popular, but then in Scotland they all seem to be Amy. My sister is a Laura and there are a stupid number of those in her age group lol

@Verbena87 Peony looks gorgeous! I'm not having a great time germinating veg seeds this year (but then I'm using up left over seed from last year...) but was out yesterday evening planting some bits out. Its so relaxing

@Francesmalin I'm so sorry to hear you're having a tough time, that really is so much for you to take in and I can only imagine how it is making you feel right now. Since you posted have you spoken to the consultant again or anyone who may be able to support you? I understand the feeling of...desperation?...in a sense when it's like shit, okay, what do we do now?! But I hope you're taking a lot of time for yourself, you really have been through so much and deserve to be able to feel you can take that time to heal x

@Verbena87 how are you getting on lovely? Sorry I've been a bit MIA it's all been going on but also I think I've just hit a bit of a shit wall where I'm feeling a bit down on myself, nothing in particular, just you know when you feel you lose your spark a bit? So I've been working on myself and taking some time out for myself to do the things I enjoy doing. I'm getting there slowly but man I didn't realise how much these last 2 cycles knocked me. Peony's are looking fabulous 😍 x

@2mumlife how are you getting on? Sorry I've been so absent! But you must be cooking away lovely now! X

@Bluemeadowbaby Hey! Lovely to hear from you. Sorry to hear you've been feeling a bit down. There is definitely a very unique kind of trauma / PTSD involved in fertility cycles, so absolutely you take time for yourself to do things you enjoy. I'm doing really well actually, feel lucky I'm nearing the end of second trimester without any negative symptoms other than heartburn on occasion, and that I've generally been feeling really well. Just hoping it continues that way as long as possible!

@Bluemeadowbaby totally understand the need to take time for yourself - I drop in and out for the same reason. Have you moved house yet? I’ve forgotten where you got up to with it all. Sending lots of love.

@2mumlife we’ve had slightly crappy germination rates too but just plugging away with what we have and not stressing too much (although I sowed 3 rows of Florence fennel early in the spring and have a grand total of 3 PLANTS, scattered weirdly across the space 🤦🏻‍♀️ - will have to dot stuff in around them!)

@Verbena87 Glad its not just me with the crappy germination! That's frustrating when you have weirdly spaced plants, but as you say pop in some quick growing things around them :) The one that most annoyed me is we did a great crop of mini aubergines in the greenhouse last year that were lovely! and not a single seed germinated this year :( but I said to DP I wouldn't buy seed and just use up what we had. The only thing that seems to be doing really well this year are spuds!

@2mumlife we’ve not done spuds this year but our fruit looks good - strawberries, blackcurrants and blueberries all looking really promising and our little plum tree is bending its branches it’s so full of fruit.

period is here so estrogen starts today. Bricking it.