Continued chat of all things IVF, FET & to feel sane...cycle buddies August/September -

[Bluemeadowbaby]

Hey ladies ☺️

A new thread to continue the one we've maxed out from the FET cycle buddies May/June. Anyone wishing to join no matter what stage you're at we're here to support you along the way.

A little background around me - I have a little boy who's 16mo from my second IVF round in 2019. I'm just embarking (restarting after covid setback) on my first FET cycle with the embryos I have in storage in the hope for baby #2 🤞🏼
I have severe endometriosis, hydrosalpinx tubes which have been removed so my only hope is for IVF to work again. It's been a long old journey but if I can give any hope, faith and a tonne of support to anyone who needs it I'm happy to share my story, updates on my cycle and be there to have a general chin wag ☺️

We've got this! ✨ x

@seathistle you can pay to have your embryos genetically tested. It takes about 10 days though so you have to freeze them and wait a cycle before you can have them implanted. I personally had one fresh transfer and the other two I sent for testing. My fresh transfer ended in miscarriage which may have been caused by a genetic issue so I'm really glad I have one embryo frozen which has been tested so hopefully if that one sticks I shouldn’t miscarry it. Testing comes with some risks though and adds a lot of cost. It’s something worth doing some research on so you can decide and ask your consultants questions about it. This is also a useful article theduff.co.uk/pgs-testing-ivf/ xxx

@Bluemeadowbaby Still waiting for clinic. I got the shittiest response to me asking that they at least inform us whether we're getting to go ahead with my next period, just saying "your message has been passed on and the lab will be in contact with you" and, obviously, not a word of contact since then.

@seathistle That's great you've got funding. Your questions will vary as everyone is different, but just make sure you know your plan of approach, and liklihood of success

So, all spewed out in my house now ... DP decided to get it too. I have no idea how I managed to avoid it! Lol...

@PinkRose100 so sorry to hear ur news x
@Verbena87 a break and pampering sounds good for u x
@seathistle glad to hear ur funding is sorted x

I'm waiting for AF due next week to start stimms... Can't quite believe its happening so quick. My plan says stimms for 7 days.. Then follicle scan... Then add cetrotide... Then fly to Prague for day 10 follicle scan with my doctor and if all good then go go go. I'm trying to stay positive but its hard when I'm reading posts about the "not so good" success rates at my age ... I know the facts, I guess I just don't want to keep reading them. I had a wobble last week when my "oh so tactful" brother in law suggested that should we be trying again after two healthy children as another might be disabled! ... Sigh... U can't choose ur family x

@firefly37 urgh, hope you don't get sick too! How do you find the whole having to go to Prague thing? And where do you get your scans done in UK? I'm curious whether going abroad migt be the next option for us. How do you find waiting times abroad?

Hi @2mumlife
There are no waiting times. I don't mind travelling as its only 1hr 40min flight and clinic is 30 mins or so from airport. Flights are cheap as is accommodation.
I get my scans done using Ultrasound Direct, my bloods with Medichecks and medication with Fertility2u.

Xx

@firefly37 That doesn't sound too bad? It seems like it all works out ok?

I'm in an absolute rage here. Finally got a response from clinic, they have FINALLY made an appointment for planning call for FET, but in FOUR WEEKS TIME. Its utterly ridiculuous. I've done this FET planning call before, literally the call is less than 20 mins of them just saying they can't guarantee the embryo will survive the thaw. They could comment this in a document! There is no reason for this to not be able to be done quickly and efficiently so we can get on with things. I'm beyond frustrated that this means we'll be waiting at least another cycle to have a transfer after the freeze all in September. The complete lack of patient choice to progress treatment is something I just can't stand. In 12 months we've had 2 attempts to get pregnant. Thats it. Completely unacceptable.

@2mumlife sorry to hear you are going through this incompetence from the clinic. It must be so frustrating for you. Why do you need to wait for 4 weeks? So annoying!

@firefly37 that's interesting way of doing it! Are the scans and blood test you do here in the UK included in the price or you need to pay extra?

@Francesmalin Because they are "very busy" at the moment. Private clinic so capitalising financially by taking on too many patients and then treating everyone like shit. Wrote a letter of complaint yesterday to vent but not sent it. Will sit on it for a few days and then see. Part of me doesn't want to give them a reason for delaying us again by sending it. I'm just so fed up. It'll be 2 years since January with the clinic and the closest.we have got to a baby is a chemical pregnancy. Only have 3 embryos left and I just want to get on with it so we can move on with our lives one way or another.

2 years in January I should say! A bug bit of the delay was covid. We got to do our 4 IUIs back to back the end of last year (all BFN) but then IVF has taken forever and it's just delay after delay. 2 pregnancy attempts and that's it. What a waste of a year when all I'm.doing it getting older and our chances are getting less and less

I am hating private clinics SO MUCH! You can't believe it. I am hearing more and more stories of women that are not treated fairly. I feel they just want to cash in without really delivering good results. They don't care about tailoring their treatments to the women and don't give a shit. I have decided the make a formal complaint against my clinic cause the level of service has been poor and yesterday they emailed me asking if I wanted to go ahead with natural cycle? I was like "what"? I haven't even fully recovered from EC and they already want me to start again?

@2mumlife I feel you... the clock is ticking for me as well!

@2mumlife, hugs your way. Clinics are so annoying!

@Francesmalin, I am also thinking of filing a complaint against my first clinic (also private and now I am with a hospital one) as the results and the whole process were so poor.

The only thing is that they are doing social freezing (and not in the current one) and I am thinking of possibly getting it done, so just holding off for now.

Is it expensive in the UK if you are aware?

What's social freezing? Is it frozen transfer? If so it's not so expensive in the UK. I think average is 1.5k + medications.

@Francesmalin, no, I meant freezing of eggs without a medical reason (for future use).

How is everyone doing? I hope it’s all positive.
I have a question I wondered if anyone knew the answer to. I’ve just started my new cycle so am trying to guess at the dates I’ll need off work. I’m going to have more eggs retrieved this cycle but the embryo I’m having implanted is a frozen tested one, so rather than implanting 5 days after egg retrieval I was wondering when they would likely plan the implantation for as the embryo is ready now. Will they still do it 5 days after retrieval anyway or can they actually implant it at the same time as the retrieval? Thanks x

Hey ladies! Sorry for the late reply, finally getting all caught up with you all. Ive been really trying to busy myself and it's worked nicely as I have my scan on Wednesday for lining check and have the overwhelming 😳🤢 feeling knowing that...🤞🏼 next week will be transfer week! I'm a little bit skeptical tho as I have been spotting since my period - always brown - I called the clinic and they said don't worry, only to be concerned if red/period like. Has anyone else experienced this? I always used to spot between periods with my endo so this to me (of course I'm great at having this mindset 😄) but it means the cycle won't work and the endo is back. I'm not in any pain it's just annoying more than anything.
I finally went on my spa break at the weekend! It was the best weekend ive had in so long with my best friend, full of proper belly laughing, hot stone massage and lots of food!!

@2mumlife that really is so shit of the clinic, I feel your frustration. When you've been waiting around for so long to then need to wait again and again is so emotionally painful. There could be every reason under the sun but it still doesn't take the edge off when it's yourself who's having to go through it. Hope you're feeling a little better (that's probably stupid to write) but sending you lots of support & hugs! X

@PinkRose100 good luck on your new cycle! I haven't heard of this before, did you get an answer for it? X

How's everyone else doing? X

Oh wow, good luck for lining scan @Bluemeadowbaby! I’ve no idea about the spotting I’m afraid, but the spa break sounds heavenly.

I am still struggling tbh. My head is so foggy and grey. However, have a counselling slot booked with the clinic next month and have a week off now for half term so that’s good.

@Verbena87 thanks! Keeping my fingers crossed it won't be doom and gloom given the spotting but we will see...

I'm so glad to hear you have a week off and some counselling in the pipeline, sometimes that little bit of recuperating is much needed. Taking that time out for your mind is so important. I can't say the grey fog will lift straight away because I know just how hard it is, but getting yourself back to feeling stronger is the first step in the right direction - sunshine mind will come again soon lovely, just take your time x

You’re so kind and lovely @Bluemeadowbaby - do let us know how you get on.

Had my wtf appointment with the clinic today. Consultant was really lovely and took time to listen and answer questions, but based on my scans and the embryos it is basically just bad luck. Apparently my lining on both failed cycles looked perfect, which is both good to know and really fucking frustrating (I want something we can fix and magically make it work). One more in the freezer but I’m having the winter off to just be.

Also in the weird position of being desperate for a baby and having to think about contraception, as we don’t really want to risk natural conception and passing on DH’s wonky gene. I used the fertility awareness method for years pre-baby (condoms for fertile days and occasional naked sex if I was very sure I was far enough post o not to catch) and that would be my preference really (I am utterly done with synthetic hormones if I’m not in with a chance of a baby at the end) but no idea how to chart cervical position with two sorts of prolapse. Anyone got any idea? The trouble is it drops in response to how active I’ve been and how tired I am, so doesn’t feel like a decent symptomatic indicator anymore.

Hi all,
@2mumlife... Sorry to hear that you have been so stressed out with ur clinic. It does sound like crappy service and I would certainly be sending a complaint or more like me would be to storm in and demand to see someone important. I really hope things get moving for u xx
@Bluemeadowbaby... I've never had spotting so no idea I'm afraid but super excited for ur transfer! About time lol! Wishing u all the luck in the world and super jealous of ur Spa weekend... I could use one! Xx
@Verbena87... Sorry to hear ur feeling down. It is shitty but it will pass and I'm glad ur taking some time out to recuperate xx
Hope everyone is doing OK.
I have officially started fresh cycle number 3 tonight... First injection done... 350iu Pergoveris. Anxiety setting in... Follicle scan on Saturday and if responding, I will be packing my munchkins up for a week in Prague. We have to treat it as a holiday as best as we can and hope a third baby comes along as an amazing side effect! Xx

Had my lining scan and all went well today which really surprised me! Wanted to see lining at 10mm and it's 13mm 🥳 go womb! 👏🏻
They think the spotting is from some cell irritation on the cervix or possibly from the boost of estrogen but just said to keep an eye on it and if it carries on when I'm doing pessaries to call and I'll go back for an examination. But so far...transfer is pencilled in for next week.
Wishing you all lots of luck to those still going through the journey, the motions or starting back up 💋 x

Crikey, that’s an awesome lining! Good work estrogen/womb! Doesn’t sound like the spotting is too much of a worry either. Sending so much luck for next week!!!

@Bluemeadowbaby great news! 👏🏼

@Verbena87 @seathistle thanks ladies! I was very impressed with the lining I don't even know what it's supposed to be I just hope it's not too good 😂 keeping fingers crossed the spotting is nothing and like you say @Verbena87 nothing to worry of 🤞🏼 x

Wow! The estrogen tablets got me feeling like 🤢 any tips on how to curb the nausea? I had to do all 10 by bedtime from 3pm yesterday the nurse did say I'd feel a bit sick, so hopefully today will be a bit better spreading out properly. Feel like I can't even talk 🤢 x

@Francesmalin Oh I would have loved if my clinic offered me next cycle straight after EC! We should trade :D I got close to a complaint, but gave them a chance to resolve things informally, which actually worked. I got a chat with one of the deputy clinic managers, and got a lot of very clear information. So as long as my period starts after 15th Nov (when the planning call is) but before 4th Dec (which is last start date before christmas) then we can do the transfer. My period should be due anytime from the 20th Nov, so I should be fine even with my cycles varying in length. So, now we're just hoping for a wee christmas miracle (I'll be holding off buying myself a Christmas bottle of Baileys until we see what way this is going to go....)

@Bluemeadowbaby I'm actually feeling better after chat. I just wanted clarity and to be able to plan things! I think it doesn't help that I'm about to become an aunty, and I started TTC way before this baby was, so it just feels unfair that we're still waiting and trying. Trying not to feel resentful, as I wouldn't actually wish infertility on anyone, but it just feels quite raw at the momnet. Go you with the thick lining though! How come so many tablets!? I felt a bit sick, I foudn staying hydrated helped. Hope tranfer goes well next week!

@TheDutchess3 I think unfertilised eggs have quite a poor survival rate after thaw, compared to embryos. Might be worth creating embryos and freezing them, as you can have false hope of plenty eggs frozen, but them not survivng freeze or fertilising.

@PinkRose100 They'll time it for to go back at day 5 (which is technically 6 days after EC, as EC is day 0 for embryo ages). Good luck!

@Verbena87 I think we all wish we could just find the thing we needed to fix to make it all magically work. I feel you.

@firefly37 Good luck!