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Infertility

Our Infertility Support forum is a space to connect with others in the same position, discuss causes, treatment and IVF, and share infertility stories of hope and success.

Original poster

August 2020 IVF - continued

691 replies

Lepatz · 06/09/2020 07:17

Morning ladies!

We hit our 1000 limit on the original thread! That’s 1000 messages of support and advice, celebrating every happy milestone, and being there for uncertainty and bad news too. Thanks @Mseddy for setting up our little cohort :)

Will try to tag the regulars, apologies if I miss anyone. @Custardandcream @nextweek @kikisparks @StayingPositive8 @Bruce2 @CardboardCat @MrsT36 @loulamay @MsNoons17 Argh, my phone is refusing to autocomplete properly - I hope that works.

Wishing everyone heath and happiness - whatever stage of the journey you're on xx

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nextweek · 19/10/2020 11:38

Hi all, for some reason I didn't get notifications about new messages so just been catching up.
@Mseddy @Lepatz that's great that you're getting started again, hopefully this will be the one!
@Bruce2 i'm so happy that you're scan went well, such a relief, congrats!
Congratulations @MsNoons17 on your bfp, fantastic news!
@StayingPositive8 glad to hear everything is going well for you
@loulamay Good luck with the pgs testing, hoping you get some good results
Hopefully I haven't missed anyone but sending lots of positive vibes to everyone :-)

nextweek · 19/10/2020 11:46

It's almost a week since we had our miscarriage confirmed. I've had a bit more light bleeding which might just be because I stopped taking the progesterone pessaries.
I thought I had handled the news ok, but to be honest as the week has gone on I've felt more and more down, just really sad and emotional. I'm not sure if it's everything hitting home or if its the hormones now that I'm not taking the progesterone. I'm finding it really hard to concentrate at work and I really need to be on my game as our industry is being hit hard by covid! I feel so unmotivated so haven't been eating very well or doing any exercise and that's making me feel worse. I'm also getting anxious about covid shutting down the clinics again and we're still waiting for our appointment with the consultant so can't ask questions about our treatment or plans for starting again. Sorry, this is a huge ramble but I feel like I don't know what to do with myself right now or how to get out of this slump. I've told a few of my friends that's we're doing IVF but none of them really understand the mental/emotional side of things so don't feel like I can unload on them.
Sorry for being so negative, especially on a Monday morning, but just needed to get that all out.

Bruce2 · 19/10/2020 15:34

@nextweek
Don't apologise for ranting or having a down day. 100% completely acceptable and we all understand!
Wish I could say something to take the feeling away, I remember being there last year when we used our last frostie and it failed. I spent between July and December last year just feeling sad, then angry, then empty. It was then we decided to use some savings to go for IVF again...then Covid hit and everything got delayed from March to July.
It's a long road and it seems like there is no end.
I hope you can come out the other side quicker than I did, you're so strong for getting through this already.
Sending massive hugs and please no that it's ok to feel a bit sh*t right now. Wallow in it for a bit. Maybe going through all the emotions is what your brain and body has to do to move on and get you ready and fighting for next challenge.
You can do this.

Mseddy · 19/10/2020 16:19

@nextweek sorry you are having a bit of a down day. This whole process is so tough! And I totally get what you mean about not being on your game at work. I stress about it all the time! Especially since not being on my A game at work could be bad for patients!! I stress about it thinking how would I feel if the embryologist wasn't on their a game the day they fertilised my embryos? So I'm constantly on my self and probably pushing myself too hard!

@loulamay I start again on the 30th Nov all AF dependant obviously!

Custardandcream · 19/10/2020 21:05

@loulamay good luck for the testing!

@nextweek sorry you are feeling down, let yourself grieve having confirmation of what you suspected will have been hard. I’m still bleeding a bit on and off and was told it could carry on until my period. The covid situation worries me, I’m in a tier 3 area! I need to chase my clinic up about some cost information so I might ask if they’ve been told anything.

I had a wobble over the weekend, too much googling! I’m really worried about how well I will respond this time but I’m not ready to give up yet so I will just have to wait and see!

nextweek · 20/10/2020 09:01

@bruce2 @mseddy @custardandcream thank you so much for your
replies, I really appreciate it, that's why this group is so great, everyone just 'gets it'. Feeling a bit better today.

@custardandcream I know how you feel being worried about how you'll respond this next time, I worry about that to as we only got 2 eggs and only 1 fertilised. Hopefully they can change something in the protocol to get a better outcome.

MsNoons17 · 20/10/2020 11:39

Glad your feeling a bit better today @nextweek you are allowed a rant given what you’ve gone through. Especially on here! X

loulamay · 21/10/2020 11:33

Hope you're doing okay today @nextweek. It's crazy how it can hit you differently on different days. Also hormones are the devil!

Day 38 of my cycle here! Come on AF... Hmm

MsNoons17 · 21/10/2020 16:06

Hi everyone, so had some bloods done and it is a BFN unfortunately. Not sure if it was a false positive or chemical pregnancy. Back to square one. This is all so exhausting!

Bruce2 · 21/10/2020 16:39

@MsNoons17

Hi everyone, so had some bloods done and it is a BFN unfortunately. Not sure if it was a false positive or chemical pregnancy. Back to square one. This is all so exhausting!
Ah what rubbish news. I'm so sorry to hear this.
MsNoons17 · 21/10/2020 17:09

Isn’t it. Thanks @Bruce2. Hope you’re good.

nextweek · 21/10/2020 17:48

@MsNoons17

Hi everyone, so had some bloods done and it is a BFN unfortunately. Not sure if it was a false positive or chemical pregnancy. Back to square one. This is all so exhausting!
So sorry to hear that, hope you're doing ok. It really is exhausting!
Mseddy · 21/10/2020 19:01

@MsNoons17 I'm so sorry. Its awful isn't it Flowers Don't think of it as back at the beginning. Your clinic will have learned things from that cycle that they can use to help out next time

Custardandcream · 21/10/2020 21:48

@MsNoons17 I’m so sorry Flowers

loulamay · 22/10/2020 06:12

sorry to hear that @MsNoons17. It's just so tough and there are definitely days that feel like two steps forward and one step back. For what it's worth, I think false positives on a digital must be pretty rare, so I think it was more likely a chemical. I took the only positive thing from mine that meant that at least implantation happened. But it doesn't really lessen the frustration and disappointment. Hope you can find a way to have a few quiet days before a relaxing weekend and some self care time xxxx

loulamay · 24/10/2020 20:45

Still no period! Day 41 now. I need good news stories! Where is everyone at in terms of their next try if the last one was unsuccessful? It's weird to be wanting to see blood when I go to the loo. Confused I think we'll kick off the PGS testing at the start of November. Already feeling anxious that we will have no 'normal' embryos! Also need to check what the clinic's policy of mosaics is.

Bruce2 · 25/10/2020 20:39

@loulamay
Wish I had something to say that would be deemed useful or inspiring right now.
Sorry things aren't progressing quickly and yes I reminder that feeling of wanting your period to come so you could get on to the next step!
I'm sorry you're feeling a bit rubbish.
Sending massive hugs xxx

nextweek · 27/10/2020 08:42

@loulamay that is so frustrating, any signs of it yet? It's typical that the one time you want it to come and it doesn't!
I'm waiting to get an appointment to speak to our consultant to discuss next steps. It's been just over 3 weeks since the bleeding from my miscarriage started, but not sure when to expect a period. I did have some light bleeding again for a few days after I stopped taking the progesterone.

loulamay · 27/10/2020 09:11

Thanks both! Funnily enough, I have started spotting today so hopefully it's on its way! At last!

Just emailed my clinic to say that we want to kick off the process next week of fertilising the frozen eggs and then getting the embryos tested. Please, please let us have a decent number to test....

@nextweek - I think the 'window' of time can vary a lot! I am on day 44 today so just over 6 weeks, which I don't think is unusual. Not sure if having a history of long cycles affected this though!

Hope everyone else is well Smile

Mseddy · 27/10/2020 21:08

Glad the witch has finally showed her face @loulamay
@nextweek I bled from my chemical and then again 29 days later so my cycle came back to normal almost instantly

Custardandcream · 27/10/2020 21:40

@loulamay hope it is starting for you! I have everything crossed you get a good number of embryos, and that you get good news from the PGS testing.

I’m hoping my periods play ball with my clinics closure dates, they are not accepting new requests for treatment until the very end of November as they are closing for Christmas. It’ll be 4 weeks on Friday since my miscarriage so it might be ok for starting in December (long protocol), although my periods can be very variable in length so I’m trying not to get my hopes up too much and I’m also worried they might have a waiting list once they reopen the books!

nextweek · 28/10/2020 12:07

@Mseddy That's good to hear, last thing I need is a messed up cycle delaying things!

@custardandcream I'm hoping to get started again before Christmas but not sure if that's going to be possible. I did short protocol last time and not sure if they'll change it for next time as my response was poor, I don't know much about the pros & cons of short versus long or why some people do one over the other so will need to ask about that.

loulamay · 28/10/2020 12:40

AF here with a vengeance but at least I can put the dates in my period app now and try and work out future cycles so I know what to expect! Emotionally weird day though, no doubt the hormones, but then I read Chrissy Teigen's article on Medium about her miscarriage and that was it. Floods!

Custardandcream · 29/10/2020 21:50

@nextweek I didn’t respond well to short protocol think I only got 5 eggs and 1 embryo, but had a much better response with long protocol think I had 14 eggs which resulted in 2 embryos.

@loulamay at least it eventually turned up! Hope you’re feeling better today I read that yesterday as well, very emotional

Original poster
Lepatz · 30/10/2020 11:36

Morning ladies, just been catching up. Great to see the continuing support in here. We were all so closely in sync for a while there, but even though our journeys are taking different turns, we're all still here :)

@MsNoons17 So sorry to hear about the BFN after the positive test. But it does seem like implantation happened, which is more info for the clinic xx

@loulamay wow, that was a long cycle - just another wait in the series of waits we have to deal with in this process!!

@nextweek Your wobble post was heart-wrenching, I hope you're feeling better now x

To those waiting for periods or clinic confirmations, good luck.

I am on day 12 of norethisterone, and day 5 of buserelin - and feeling a bit of an emotional wreck. It doesn't quite feel real right now. Work has been super hectic for the last two weeks, and then between the increasing restrictions, and the grey damp weather, it's hard to remain cheerful. ET is due in about 3 weeks - I'm crossing everything that it doesn't get cancelled.

What a year!!

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