IVF May/June Cycle Buddies

[Mrbay]

Hi

Couldn't see a thread for May/June - hoping that I'm not on my own for this cycle as its our 2nd cycle and feeling worried that I won't get to transfer.

Would be great to share the ups and downs with others, I'm starting buserelin next Wednesday (27th May).

@MorgenMuffel Congrats on being PUPO! Exciting times!

@mrbay I've signed a form saying that DH and I will social distance, but not isolate.

@ails286 Welcome to the thread! We decided to limit the number of people we tell, and as every cycle comes and goes, that list gets shorter. I found it hard telling people it hadn't worked. So now, I keep it to myself - and you lovely ladies of course!

@ivfgottobepositive AF came today so I'm booked in for my first scan on Saturday, and looking to start stims then. I've not started injections this late either so it will be interesting to know follicle and blood levels. They wanted me in for a day five scan but that's Sunday, so technically I am due to start stims on day five, like you are now. Try not to worry about it!

I had the clinic call today about my bloods. The sample is wrong again! So when I have my scan on Saturday I need to have the test taken for the third time. I just hope the results come back before transfer 🤞🏼

@HJF84 thanks! Not really thought of it in those terms but have been thinking positive, so will use this as my mantra. Good luck for your scan on Sat and hope it's third time lucky with the bloods

@HT2101 do you mind saying how much the NK test was? Did they offer you any additional tests?

I’m meant to be starting buserelin on Sunday but I still have heard from clinic/stork!
Can they do express delivery? I think they forgotten to contact me! x

@MorgenMuffel sure, it was approx £900, not cheap but at least it was an answer even if it wasn’t the one I was hoping for. Other immune tests they do are EMMA, ALICE or ERA.

Hi, can I join? I’m due to start my first cycle in a few days when my period arrives. Feeling very nervous / excited / scared. We were days away from starting in March before all the clinics were closed so the medication has just been sitting in my fridge for a couple of months now.

We’ve been trying for over 2 years including a miscarriage in early 2019 so hoping IVF can help. We haven’t had any specific diagnosis and everything looks good on paper but it’s just not happening.

I’m 37 and I have a good AMH level (23) but I assume the issue is my age and egg quality. Hopefully there’s one or two good eggs left in there.

Wishing everyone the very best of luck!

Yes totally. When we got married i was so open and excited and even had a pininterest for the nursery and then when it didnt happen and everyone else I knew seemed to get pregnant I wanted to talk less and less about it.
My sister in law is due any day now and I must admit im finding it a bit hard and I am quite jealous but of course really happy for her just wish it was me too haha
In regards to work I have told the half truth im going to say I am looking at freezing my eggs because I know they wouldnt be understanding if I told them the entire truth and would be askkng me anout it and i dont want the pressure of it not working i am just super aware this will probably be a long process
I might tell my mum and that is it and the natropath I have been seeing to help us haha i tried everything haha

@UncleBrynsfishingtrip I'm sure they can do express delivery! Hopefully you'll hear from them this morning.

@Ails826 I've done both - telling loads of people and telling no one and there are pros and cons to both. Sometimes I felt like I really needed the support of my friends and other times I was glad to have it as a complete secret! That's a good idea telling work you are looking at egg freezing - wish I'd thought of that at the time as a perfect 'excuse'!

@Dbrook welcome! Sorry to hear about your miscarriage. Fingers crossed for a smooth and successful cycle!

@HJF84 how annoying that the sample was wrong! Hopefully you'll get the results back quickly. Exciting that AF is here and you can get going!

@MorgenMuffel how are you feeling? Hope you are ok!

@HT2101 that's interesting. Do you need to shield or isolate as a result of taking it do you know?

I don't really tell anyone in real life anymore - family gets the bare minimum of information eg when egg collection is in case i need childcare. I don't tell them about transfers - my mother said she didn't consider "it" a baby until 12 weeks pregnancy (and I've lost 8 between 7 and 12 weeks) - I can't deal with the disappointment in their lack of support/compassion anymore so it's easier just to deal with the whole thing on our own

Oh @ivfgottostaypositive thats so terrible I am so sorry.
I have the same lack of compassion from my mother in law so i dont tell her anything she doesnt even know we are doing IVF because of the way she reacts to it. I feel at a tine like this you need more nuturing over tough love or plain dismissive
Its such a hatd journey to be on, my sister in law is currently literally giving birth right now and Iv had a good cry in the shower what I would give to me in her position but its our own journey we will all get there it jjst might not be the way we had wanted it to go !

We still haven't told anyone because I can't be dealing with questions during an already stressful time, plus I need to come to terms with it potentially not ever happening first. However that does mean we are still getting the do you want kids then questions

@elleceedee I presume I’ll have to self isolate. Concentrating on trying to make some viable embryos first off!!

@Dbrook fingers crossed for your first cycle, my meds have been sitting in the fridge since March too. And don’t worry too much about your age... I’m older than you

sorry to read about everyone's lack of family support.

@ivfgottostaypositive I'm so sorry to hear about your losses and your mum's reaction. I hope you have support from others even if your mum isn't giving you what you need right now

@Ails826 it is so hard when others seem to find it easy. All of my close friends are on to their second DC and I'm just hoping we'll get to 1!

I have told parents plus one person at work as he manages my diary so I felt I had to explain why I had two weeks of being unavailable on alternate days! But if we do more rounds I think I would try to keep it quieter.

Yes I was about to tell someone and my mum and Iv decided to just leave it i cant bare the idea of the first round not working

So sorry to hear about the lack of family support guys. @ivfgottostaypositive I completely understand. My in laws found out we were ttc after our first miscarriage and my mil especially just makes awful comments, really piling on the pressure asking if we are still ttc, why is everything going wrong, is there something wrong with me (never her son!) And I must have done something bad for this to be happening...

@ails826 my sister in law announced she was pregnant on our wedding anniversary and i cried for 2 days. I felt resentful and then guilty for being resentful! There are so many emotions that come at you st the same time, it's all so overwhelming.

@Wesstywoo that's such an annoying question! I used to try and be tactful when answering and now I just say none of your business and watch them fluster. They dont care how the question may upset you so I figure I shouldnt care if they get upset!

At least we have places like this to vent our feelings - grateful to you all for being so open.

I’ve told my mum but that’s it. If it works I’ll be totally open about needing IVF but I find it hard to talk about while I’m going through it if that makes sense.

I’m finding it really hard to plan around work. I’ve told them I’ll need some time off at short notice in the next couple of weeks, but it’s hard to know exactly when my egg collection is going to be as I guess it depends on how my scans go and how I respond to the meds? Doesn’t help that I’m covering for a colleague who’s been furloughed so I’m extra busy.

@Dbrook

One of the few people who has known is my male boss (work in very male dominated industry - I'm the only woman in team) - he is really good about me going for scans, finding somewhere to do injections, working from home. He says he treats me like how he hopes is daughters would be treated in the workplace if they had to go through one day this which is nice.
But I'm based at home at the moment anyway with the virus restrictions so this time I don't need to worry so much

@wesstywoo

I wouldn't mind the questions - at least it shows some interest. I try and talk to them about the process and what it's like but I just get told it's "too technical" for them and "me and your dad never had to worry about this in our day" or my sibling thinks that her life is so much more worse (she's a STAHM!) and that doing the school run is more stressful 🤔

How is everyone doing ? @MorgenMuffel exciting time for you :-) are you feeling ok ?

sorry to hear everyones lack of family help or support, our inlaws know and the other family know about the last 2 times and the loss but i felt like after it happened that was it as my sis in law gave birth a few weeks later so its been all about my nephew which is fine, but i still felt like well i did just lose a baby. So this time no one apart from MILK/FIL know we are currently doing the process (prob know we will be doing it at some stage)

I was going to tell my boss they are great about things, but then i dont want her to look on it badly like we are all going through this and the business is struggling and im trying to get pregnant !

We have decided not to tell anyone else if and until we get further along god willing this time ( ive had my heart set on an announcement at 12 weeks always have) so only time will tell.

I feel like time is dragging now i have my lining scan check on tuesday and then we shall see if i need to go back or we can book in our FET and pray our emmbie defrosts ok xx

Keep up the faith ladies this is our lucky thread x

@Dbrook yes im exactly the same i rend to blurt it out to my mum when its in the past like when I was on clomid or something but i find it hard to talk about when its happening I find it quite a raw subject

@BKB27 oh no that would have been awful, my sil announced while we were in the shops and i remember walking out they nee we were trying because we used to tall about it before we got married at when we would want children

My mil is a very harsh kind of person who says all the wrong things so I try not to be alone with her so i dont get asked

@MrsLouB oh thats so exciting yes the ttw drags enough i dont think I am ready for the IVF waiting haha

Yes absolutely this is our lucky thread and we are going to see some BFP come from it !

@ivfgottostaypositive that’s great that your boss is so understanding. He sounds very kind. I’m working from home too but ironically I chose my clinic to be close to the office so I’ll have to travel in specially now. But I’m lucky I can relax at home and wear comfy clothes for the next few weeks.

thats really upsetting to hear that a few of you don't have supportive families - makes it so much harder. DH & I are the 2nd couple in his family to go through IVF so its great to have others to speak too.

My best friend surprised me with flowers today, which contained the message 'you've got this x' which is simple but just lifted my spirits today. Slightly sad that we both got pregnant in the same week but mine wasn't to be but she's a great support.

My boss is being pretty chilled about it but is glad that I am working from home for this cycle - the stims send me a bit crazy and short tempered, not great when you work in HR!

I'm desperately trying not to think about possible outcomes, I get excited that this could be our time, then I worry that I won't have any eggs - anyone else feel like that?

I completely agree with everyone, so sorry to hear that some of you don't have supportive families and for the quite frankly shocking comments some of you have had. I took it for granted really, but hearing your experiences makes me really appreciate the support I am getting. Hopefully being able to share with us helps a little - feel free to vent away!

@Dbrook welcome! I similarly chose a clinic close to work, and whilst I am in the office a couple of days a week, it's sods law that my appointments have been largely on days I've not been in the office! Hope the travelling isn't too bad for you. You're right, it can be tricky to plan around work etc. but I found taking the approach you have already by being upfront about you will need some days off but not 100% sure when yet, worked well for me. Work appreciated I was giving them some warning and I just kept them updated as things developed - hopefully your work will be the same too.

@Mrbay I am completely the same, swing from wild optimism to the depths of the despair. During my fresh cycle I was really worried about the fact I didn't initially respond to the stims very well, only had 10 follicles in the end and only 8 eggs collected - but it really is about quality not quantity so try not to get too hung up on the numbers.

@Wesstywoo I often find a response of "we want them but it's not as simple as just wanting them" usually shuts people up quickly enough if they are asking about when we are going to have babies - it is a firm end to the conversation but without revealing details personal to me.

@elleceedee @MrsLouB I'm doing ok thanks, feeling pretty normal! Had a bit of heartburn/nausea early this morning but I know its far too early to mean anything! Been trying to keep myself busy whilst WFH and I'll be back in the office tomorrow so another day of hopefully not agonising over every possible symptom. I've still been succumbing to too many snacks really, but trying not to beat myself up too much as at the end of the day, if this round fails it's not going to be because I've eaten a biscuit! My meals are healthy and I am including lots of proteins and good fats, so that is the main thing.

Hope everyone stimming, being scanned, and waiting to get started are all doing ok. What do people have planned for the weekend?

@Mrbay

Sometimes i feel quite chilled about it and other times I obsess over everything! My clinic just laughs now and sends me over sheets with my follicle sizes on and e2 levels from my scans as they know I spend many sleepless nights on google!

My first cycle I was a wreck as a friend cycled a couple of weeks before me and didn't get any embryos to 5 day blasts and the whole cycle was a bust - I didn't even know that could happen so I was a mess the 5 days after egg collection waiting to see what we had. I know not to get hopes up too much now - going into 5th cycle I'm very much at the point of "if it works it works if it doesn't it doesn't"

I think I've finally lost my mind! Cooking boiled eggs for breakfast (upping protein during stims!) and I suddenly felt really weird about eating an animal's eggs! Feeling a bit protective of my own eggs today 🤣

God I need a drink! 🤣🤣