IVF Feb/March 2

[SpyroC]

A new thread to carry on supporting each other as the old one was full.

Sorry to hear you're feeling in pain and sad CarbsAndCheese. Many of us have been there before (more than once). It does suck. I hope you clear this from your system, make sure to get nice and healthy for your next go and look forward to transferring your lovely embryo back to where it belongs once this CV business blows over. It reminds me of something Leo Babauta said once on his Zen Habits blog (zenhabits.net/) - Embrace the suck. I try to remember this when things are stressful. Good luck x

@CarbsandCheese your feelings are to be expected and are completely valid. You had expectations of what this cycle should have been and had to change everything at the last minute, it was all totally out of your control. I'm sorry you're in pain, hope you've got the good painkillers.
I understand, I really do. I had some tears yesterday when I learnt we only managed to get 1 frozen and that it should have been transferred back into me already. I feel quite despondent about it all tbh. All of that, for 1 blast. I'm waiting for my period to arrive, I have pre af rumblings and am very tearful and grumpy.
We're here to listen if venting helps. Fwiw I think a Spooks binge watch is a fabulous idea. I'm baking bread and cooking to distract myself x

@CarbsAndCheese no doubt everyone on here will understand what you're going through. I know it must feel really frustrating to get to the retrieval and then have everything put on hold. This whole social isolation makes it so difficult to distract ourselves from thoughts too. Hopefully it won't be long before you get the chance to use your frozen one and in the meantime take the time to rest up and relax

@carbsandcheese I'm so sorry. I completely understand where you are coming from. It's just such a tough thing to go through and I don't think anyone realises how much of yourself you put into it and over such a long time. After my last failed round I felt a bit lost. I'd spent months and months obsessing about doing everything right, eating everything right that almost every thought or decision came back to the IVF. When it was over I felt like I had lost more than a bit of me. Luckily my lovely husband booked a spur of the moment weekend in Blackpool for the next weekend (only place he could get because it was a bank holiday). I hadn't been since a child and was surprised by how much fun I had. We went on rides, ate chips and donuts, drank too much and basically did everything we had been avoiding. I can't tell you how much better I felt afterwards and I didn't even know I needed it. So, I understand why you need a holiday and don't worry you will get one. Just sit tight this will pass xxxx

@Rumtopf I'm sorry your over 2 didn't make it. When my 2 didn't I felt sad for them. At least we each have one-let's hope they're fighters!

I'm sorry to hear your feeling down @CarbsAndCheese . The whole situation is so difficult to deal with it's like we're in a scary film. It's totally understandable to feel how you do. No need to man up at all. If your anything like me when you come on your hormones will be making things even worse too. When the fog lifts you will be able to focus on what's ahead and if it makes you feel any better the other side is somewhat spoiled too. If I get a positive I'll be delighted but will be worried about being pregnant with c19 around on top of the usual ivf pregnancy worries. If I get a negative I'll be gutted and then be worried about having nothing in the freezer and there being a massive back log for trying again. C19 really has screwed things up for all of us. As you say, we can't even have our consolation holidays! We will get through this though, we must be strong to have survived ivf! Sending hugs my triplet friend xx

@Rumtopf so sorry your other two didn't make it. At least you have that one little embryo though!

I feel like i just can't catch a break, my husbands sister has just announced she's pregnant. She was obviously apologetic which isn't her fault at all, they had IVF for their first child so this is a huge surprise. So i should be feeling wonderful for her. I just feel like i need to get away and we are just stuck with this bloody virus. I honestly can't cope anymore.

Oh @luby89k I'm so sorry! What a kick to the teeth. Joyful for her but so tough for you.

Shame about that news luby89k. She's obviously from the same team as well given her history of infertility. You'll be next to share happy news though I hope. Stay strong x

Sorry about the baby bomb @luby89k . The last thing you need to hear right now.

I'm 9dp5dt and the tww is driving me crazy. For the past 3 mornings I've had my usual af/endo cramps. It's horrible and just feels like the progesterone is stopping af. There are women who have af/endo cramps and still get a bfp so I'm trying to stay positive. I always thought it was the bleeding endo implants that caused pain so I don't really get it.

Hi SpyroC I kinda feel the same about the 2ww driving you crazy. I don't know how endo pain feels but I sympathise as I hear it's horrible. I wanted to cry last night cause the waiting is so stressful but then I said No! I'm gonna read and go to bed. What's bleeding endo implants?

Basically the endo grows outside the uterus, these are called implants. They bleed when your progesterone drops in the same way your lining sheds. They think the pain is worse than usual period pain because the blood from the implants has nowhere to go. This is why I'm confused, I'm not bleeding so what's causing the pain 🤷🏻‍♀️.

I know it's so hard. Stupid c19 making it worse as we can't distract ourselves. I'm falling behind with work because the morning pain requires reassurance Googling! 🙈

@CarbsAndCheese sorry to hear you are feeling down - other triplet sending un MN like hugs. Felt rubbish at the weekend when my big bleed was imminent/starting. Coming through the other side now. Think it was something to do with actually being able to see everything I'd worked to establish for ET coming away. It's absolutely rubbish, but it will pass and the situation will too.

Hard part is we don't have any time scales and have had everything changed at the last minute - I felt mentally prepared when I started the IVF and had a good background understanding of everything, this time nothing until we can get in to see the nurse after everything. I can't work out if the fact my SIL is due this weekend and there's going to be a new baby to zoom/Skype will help or make things harder. Think we have to allow ourselves to have days where we feel rubbish (I already know sat will be hard as would have been testing....) and not try to push that aside unprocessed. Just trying to do what I can when I can and hoping that you, me and those who got cancelled and frozen can all pick up again ASAP and support each other again to our outcomes.

Thanks for the explanation SpyroC. What a painful condition :-(

Good luck with the wait Granddesigns. I hope they book you in within next 3-6 months at the latest x

When will you test? I don't think you need to wait two weeks from transfer as you already have five days into the process. I believe I tested 10 days post transfer which was 15 days since "conception" if you will.

I'm gonna be strict and only test the day I was told (Sunday coming eek!) which is 16 days post egg collection.

P.s. I worry about getting a faint positive sooner and later realising it was an early miscarriage that wouldn't have been known if I had tested on my testing day....

Me and DH we're thinking about testing earlier but we also decided to try and hold out until otd. Which is 16dpEC as well. think a faint positive will worry me and a negative will leave me thinking "it could be too early".

I absolutely agree, don’t test until your OTD. I know it’s tough, but it’s best to get a definitive response without having to second guess. 🤞🤞

Yeah, try and hold out till the official test day. It leaves too many doubts and questions in your head otherwise. I tested the next day even after doing my OTD just to make sure so dont make things murkier for yourself. You will just put undue stress/'pressure on yourself and let's face it, in the days of Covid, we are under enough pressure as it is.

Hi Ladies. Bad news. I got my period today. So I'm out of the game. I discovered it late morning so I need to wait until tomorrow morning to confirm with a pregnancy test. I know my body though and I've had both success and failure so I know this is it for me. It's gonna be pesky putting in those pessaries while bleeding but gotta cover myself until test confirms. I feel sad and emotionally exhausted but also trying to focus on the positive things in my life. Even my husband had a tear in his eyes when I told him. I am a bit surprised as the embryo was a 4AB. So although I have one frozen 4AB to put back in I'm a bit skeptical about how it can turn out any different. Well, only time will tell...

@Chatwithme I'm sorry to hear that news. It's such a tough process to go through and is definitely emotionally draining. The only way we can get through it is to think of the good things we already have. Do you think you will try again with your frozen embryo?

Sorry to read your update @ChatWithMe - take care of yourself today and in the days to come.

Sorry to hear your update @chatwithme. Please take care of yourself and take all the time you need. From what I understand there is often no real reason why IVF fails, which means that there is no reason that you won't have success with the frozen egg if that's what you decide to do. In fact, I have read that some clinics say frozen transfers are more successful as your body gets time to recover. Lots of love xx

Thanks Robson13 granddesigns and confused107. It's great we can support eachother on here. It makes me feel like I'm not alone in this. I wish you all beautiful little 2021 babies (or sooner for those with BFPs :-)). Gonna treat my self to gin, coffee and running in the park this coming week. Not all at once lol

So sorry to hear @chatwithme I know it’s a horrible feeling when it doesn’t work, but try to stay strong, if any of your friends know that you have been going through IVF, pick up the phone and speak with them, I know that helped me when my first round failed. Definitely try to think of some positives and treat yourself, give your husband big hugs too.