IVF in Feb/March 2020?

[waitingforarainbow]

Hello! I'm just wondering whether there are others starting their IVF journey in Feb/March 2020.

I am dealing with secondary infertility (male factor) and we have been TTC#2 for 16 months. We conceived naturally by some miracle back in July, but sadly had an early miscarriage (my third in total). We're now waiting to start ICSI IVF in early February.

Would love to hear from others doing the same. x

@luby89k mine was exactly as my normal period so only 1 day heavy. Only difference has been the ongoing spotting. It seems there is not normal when it comes to DR bleeds. I have been on for 16 days so it sounds quite normal. It does drag though doesn't it?! X

@Youngatheart00 I believe they would have called you if the failed. Most likely not calling as the transition from day 3 to 5 is more favourable because they hatch on day 5 and show the strongest ones. I know it seems sad to loose out on other developing ones but gives you the best chance for a successful transfer if they rule out the weakest from the strongest.
The time lapse embryoscope
Is also just an added tool to see how many cells are divided as they should. They use this in trying to guess which embryo again is strongest but does not mean they can give u anymore information. From day 3 to 5 is a wait forsure but it’s positive when they keep
Going.

@picklekid good luck today!
@youngatheart00 I don't know the answer as I've not got to that stage yet, but could you call them for an update? I guess no news is good news, but it doesn't stop you worrying.

It’s over for us. None of our embryos made it. To say it’s a sucker punch is an understatement as we’ve already decided this was our last try. So it’s over.

I’m going to bow out of this thread and probably mumsnet in general but I really do wish you all the best.

Not particularly good news here either. 18 to 9 to 3ish with no front runner. They sent me home to let them incubate a bit longer 😐

We are still in it but there's a a chance none will be strong enough. Or they are late bloomers and just need a few hours. They just don't know yet.

We go back at midday.

To @Youngatheart00 if you're still here, sending you love. This is all very hard. I try to tell myself that we did our best and will continue to do so whatever choices are made next.

@PickleKid still here (just about). I’m sorry. It really sucks doesn’t it. You just feel you do everything right and hope and hope and hope and then it doesn’t go your way. I was fairly pragmatic after our first cycle failed but this one hasn’t gone well throughout and I can’t live in limbo anymore, it’s affecting our relationship and quality of life too much.

Really really hoping your 3 get over the final hurdle x

@youngatheart00 I'm so sorry. There aren't enough words are there? Thinking of you.

@picklekid here's hoping those 3 were just a little slow on the uptake and they get it together over the next few hours.

I just had another call from the clinic about my weight. Can I just pop in today to be weighed... er no, it's a 120mile round trip. So if I am weighed tomorrow before my PTA and I'm too heavy then the PTA won't go ahead and I'll be sent home, and treatment deferred, like an errant child. That looks like me doing a water fast for the next 24 hours to make sure I scrape in. I honestly don't know what more I can do. Why did the Dr at my first appointment say I would be fine and I was 4lbs heavier then? If she'd set my expectations for this it would have been realistic and fine, but now to change the goalposts at the 11th hr and make me feel like this is quite frankly a bit shit.

@Youngatheart00 I'm so so sorry. I know that's not enough words but I'm thinking of you. Please be kind to yourself and put yourself and your relationship first

@PickleKid I have everything crossed that you are heading in to better news now

@Rumtopf I'm sorry. The whole process is just shit. I feel like a failure at every stage of this process. A failure that I even need the treatment then the language that is used through treatment just reinforces it 'low AMH score' like I failed a test 'lack of response to drugs' like I didn't do something. I say this because I want you to know that this isn't you. Don't let them make you feel like shit. In the words of my holistic therapist 'you are well, you are whole, you are healthy, you are strong' xx

@confused107 thankyou, although that made me cry. I feel like such a fat, useless failure.

I don't think the healthcare professionals really have much understanding of how it feels to be in our place. When I had a mc at 11 weeks, the Dr addressed it as a "spontaneous abortion", and couldn't understand why I got angry with him. I shall certainly be addressing this with the clinic tomorrow regardless of whether I'm allowed to proceed. They've put my stress levels through the roof and I'm quite cross with them for not being transparent to begin with. If I'd been given realistic expectations and goals then that would be ok, but as it is they simply look hungry to take our money.

I'm so sorry to hear that....everything about the whole process is hard. I'm already starting to think that if it's not successful this time I'm not sure I'd have the motivation to keep going

And I've just realised how insensitive I've been. I'm so sorry, I got a bit self absorbed there.

@picklekid have you had an update?

You didn’t sound insensitive @Rumtopf. The whole process is just so fraught all the way through. Reason I want to bow out is I don’t want to be too negative and bring others that still have every reason to be hopeful down. Just hanging on to see how @PickleKid is.

@youngatheart00 so sorry to hear your news. I totally understand how ppl can't keep going through this process indefinitely- it is very draining. Take good care of yourself xxx

@picklekid I'm sorry to hear that too. I hope you get better news this afternoon. A couple of ours were slow but then developed quickly at the end so it could happen🤞🤞

Hi all we got one in. Still not sure about the other two. Will know tomorrow if they can be frozen. Just try to remember it only takes one.

Thanks for waiting for me @Youngatheart00 . Sending you all the warm feelings and strength.

Partner: why are you crying?
Me: I'm in this group and and everyone's so JUST DRIVE!

IVF all the feels, all the time.

Brilliant that you’ve got one on board. Sending you the best vibes

@PickleKid that's great that you have one on board! Every reason to be hopeful.

@Youngatheart00 I don't think you should feel the need to bow out unless you want to. It's a big, awful, day. I hope that the thread can help by letting you share a bit maybe? We're not just here for the success stories.

@Rumtopf I'm sorry that your clinic is adding additional pressure, that's absolutely the last thing anyone going through this needs.

I'm so sorry @Youngatheart00 . Words just don't do it. Please look after yourself and I agree, feel free to share as much as you like. I am an optimistic 1st timer but am very aware of the stats. We are all here to support each other with both good and bad news. People in RL, with the best will in the world, often don't get it do they. Xx

@Rumtopf you have every right to be angry. As others said it is nothing you have done. I think they forget how stressful and upsetting this process is and most of them probably haven't experienced it first hand.

@PickleKid I'm so glad you got one in. 100% only takes one. 🤞🏻 for the other 2 too. Sounds like you've had a stressful day so I hope you're able to relax now x

I'd better go cook dinner and build up to my first injection.

@youngatheart00
I'm soooo sorry to read your news 😔
If you feel it best to bow out of the thread, I really don't blame you
Spend sometime with the partner and recharge getting yourself into a better place mentally- it must be extremely hard to go through all of this and not get the result you so truely want and deserve

The one thing my husband and I agreed on from day dot, was that we had each other and that's all that we needed. But we laughed and said we'd rehome 10 bulldogs - we have 1 and that's enough 🤣

But you do need to make sure you look after you - have each other and support one other ❤️
It's always hard to find the right words to say - sending lots of hugs xx

You can do it @SpyroC

By the last one you'll have friends or family round and do it mid-chat without breaking your punchline.

It will get to be just something you do at night, I promise!

Thanks @PickleKid .The actually injection turned out to be ok. The bit that stressed me out was all the mixing! She made it look so easy yesterday. I don't know what I did wrong but it went from 1.5 ml of water to about 0.5ml 😬. Using the water with 6 amps was really difficult. I think I was losing liquid trying to get rid of all the stupid air bubbles. It really stressed me out and being left with 0.5 made me feel like a failure. How do I avoid all the bubbles? I watched a few on you tube but nobody else seemed to have this issue.

Ah well at least because it was so concentrated I still would've got a decent dose.

@Rumtopf they hadn't flagged my weight either. Yet my last appointment they decided i needed to put weight on. It's super annoying because they are telling me to eat yoghurt and whole milk to put weight on but i'm lactose intolerant so i can't. They've also told me to be on a mediterranean diet which is healthy but will not make me put on weight. I have to put on half a stone by EC otherwise they can't do it. It's very frustrating when they could have said this a year ago. I know it may seem easier to put weight on but i'm struggling. I completely feel for you. Why do they wait till the last minute to tell us these things.

@Youngatheart00 so sorry to hear your news. Take some you time and try and spend time with your partner for a little while. It's a horrendous process which no one can really understand. Sending lots of love your way. xxx

Thank you so much all of you lovely people. I will stick around, for a little while, if that’s ok. It is nice to hear how others are going on and if I can help, I will.

@SpyroC I was on a prefilled pen this cycle but for my first I was on Meriofert which I had to mix. The first night I was sweating buckets and in tears because I never thought I’d get it right and I wasted 2 vials!! Don’t be too bothered about the air bubbles. Tiny ones are fine, and if you flick the syringe they should dissipate. I found making a ritual of it actually quite therapeutic in the end. I’d put a chill out playlist on and just take my time. I also had to be entirely alone as I found distractions unhelpful. It’ll soon be second nature, the more you mix the more confident you’ll get at it - honest.

@SpyroC like you I'm on 6 amps and it's a pickle every night. I just ignore the air bubbles until I have the injection needle on and I'm ready to go. I figure there is no point bothering about them when I'm going in and out the amps. Please don't feel like a failure, we are not trained nurses, we are just doing our best. It gets easier every day