Keith's BPG II

[KittyKatSmile]

@AliciaWhiskers @CornishMaid1 @Ginandtonic31 @Cauliflower82 @Welshpugmomma @Mrbay @Zest11 @RRoonilWazlib @Weenumpty

Hope this works xx

@KittyKatSmile I think it's more because my OH feels like he wants to know to try and bond better (and also I would like a girl so I want to be prepared. Not because I wouldn't like a boy of course, just gives me the time to bond and get my head around it. I also think it will help me as I've struggled with the whole thing). But yes of course I will share! I'm not going to buy any clothes until I know. Not because I will buy everything pink! Just because I can think more about stuff. Although not buying a lot.

I'm debating booking a holiday to Dubai next month. Really I should use the money to do the patio and spare bedrooms and nursery, especially with my wage going to maternity in just 6 pay days! But I'm arguing my well-being and mental health need a holiday...

Yes, you've all really helped clarify things. Rest assured my NHS transfer is definitely not going to waste, I'm a tight arse!

@Ginandtonic31 I completely understand choosing the gender. I would (although I am having a grey and white nursery regardless!) as like you said, it will give you time to get your head around things. If Dubai is going to help your mental health - do it. It may be the last time for a while you can have a relaxing holiday with your dh for a few years! The patio can be done next summer...or the summer after that... Is there somewhere more affordable than Dubai you would be happy going to as a compromise?

I would assume it was transfers as like @KittyKatSmile says full cycles would be subjective and throw out the results.

Given you've got a few frosties left, if you need to (fingers crossed the next one takes) you'll only have to pay for the transfers. If you have to get to that stage, perhaps have a look around. I'm happy with bath fertility as my consultant is pretty direct and the nurses have been fab!

@Ginandtonic31 - you have to do what is best for you and your OH. Personally, I love a surprise (I never get them, as I'm so controlling on what I get for birthday/Christmas as I hate waste!) But I don't judge those who chose to know the sex.

@Zest11 we've been saying we will do the patio later for three years 😂but I do think we will get the benefit of a holiday as won't get another until next October. Tbh Dubai is quite affordable really as everywhere is hiked prices at minute due to exchange rates. I looked at Greece and it was only something like £200 cheaper.

I wish there was an accurate way to work out maternity pay.

@Ginandtonic31 If you type in HMRC smp maternity calculator on google it will come up with some details you can enter however that's just the basics. If your employer offers more, you will have to add that on as extra I guess. I see what you mean about Dubai, I didn't think about exchange rates. I would go for it tbh. If the patio's been waiting 3 years it can carry on waiting!

Yes thank you @Mrbay and @KittyKatSmile I did wonder how it worked with the different cycles as I thought some people might only get 1 or 2 eggs for transfer per collection whereas some people (not mentioning any names @ginandtonic31 ) get 9 frozen and I got really confused. To be honest I've probably overthought it all and worked myself up. I'm just finding it impossible to get around the fact there are no answers.

@Zest11 have you tried the Mindful IVF app I haven't banged on about for a while?! I can't quite say what he does but I found myself in a very calm state of mind and that really isn't me at all. He's got plenty of 'modules' which you could try to see if they work for you. Most of them are free I think.

And yes, the insomnia's going really well. I've actually grabbed my phone to listen to the app while trying to go back to sleep after my 3rd wake up tonight

Hi everyone! I lost the thread but found it after some searching and have just had a good catch up!

@Zest11 totally didnt come across as psycho so glad you're feeling better with the decision to go ahead with your nhs cycle!

We had our booking in appointment last week and have our scan booked in for 30th Aug, I wont quite be 12 weeks at that point but they must know what they're doing when they book it

The baby's Daddies want to know the sex so we will definitely be finding out when the time comes!

Were also going to be consultant led, pir midwife said they class any and all IVF pregnancies as high risk so will initially be consultant. She did say as well that if towards the end everything is fine, its possible to be put onto midwife led which would be nicer for birth!

Hope everyone is getting on ok xxx

Oh, and I cant bloody wait to come off these meds! A week and a bit and I can start weaning!!

@Zest11 o going the HMRC stuff but I'm struggling as I get something like 8 weeks at full pay, so many weeks at half plus SMP, so many at SMP and then I don't know how much tax so it's hard to get an accurate look at how much I will be 'down' each month. Although I shouldn't complain as I get about a £4,000 increase next November so when I go back I will be on a new wage... which will get swallowed by nursery fees 😂but st least I shouldn't be any worse off than now.

@KittyKatSmile it might be his Irish voice!!

@RRoonilWazlib Yay another one weaning. Finally we can all be drug free. I've been on some type of hormone for two years now.

I'm having no symptoms at all. Slightly worried babies buggered off somewhere...

@KittyKatSmile Arghh Keith, sorry to hear you were up all night again. Hope you get chance tomnap today if needed. Yes I have tried the Mindful IVF, it helped me get in the frame of mind for IVF and was really positive about it all. Will download it again actually, thank you for the reminder.

@RRoonilWazlib so glad you have found us, I wondered where you had gone. I am glad you're able to come off the meds soon. Forgive me for asking... baby's Daddies? Are you acting as a surrogate? Sorry if I have missed something.

@Ginandtonic31 yes that's really tough. I guess you could ask HR/Finance at work for a rough idea about how to work it out? That's great that you will be getting a pay rise though in time for nursery fees! Have you thought about how long you would like to have off?

@Zest11 I think you're right. That's the only way I can know. But I think it's too early to ask right now! I'm thinking of 9 months with a month and a bit tagged on as annual leave. So I think finish end of Feb and go back mid January. And I want to try and do a KIT day each month if work agree so that I've done all ten then. So I would like to try and work out the full amount of pay over the 10.5 months and then divide it by 10.5 so I get an equal sum each month. I think I've heard they can do that. Otherwise every month will be a different amount! I really need to speak to HR but will probably give it some time yet.

@Ginandtonic31 I really cant wait. These patches are starting to irritate my skin now! Not sure how and when I'm weaning off the progynova but i know I'll be totally med free by 12 weeks. I need to all my clinic and see about the progynova.

@Zest11 yes, I am I've definitely mentioned it once before as I was unsure if I'd be okay joining in with the thread. It was when I first joined in and it was very fast paced then!

@RRoonilWazlib I remember! But I had forgotten until you mentioned! But I remember us all saying you had to join! Such a lovely thing. Are the Dads excited?!

How many weeks are you and how many Progynova are you on? I was on 4 and then at 10 weeks I moved to 3 for 4 nights (I'm 2 nights in to that) then 2 for 4 nights and then 1 for 6 nights then I will be 12 weeks and done!

Ok I have no symptoms any more at all. I can even face meat again as has a big Sunday lunch! Been out on a 7 mile bike ride and walk today. Im slightly worried this little one just isn't growing anymore

@Ginandtonic31 they're so so excited! Their parents and siblings are too!

I'm 9+4 today. Currently on 6 progynova a day, 2 at breakfast, 2 at dinner and 2 at tea! Another week and a bit until I start to decrease the cyclogest and oestrogen patches but hoping I can start lowering my progynova soon so I'm totally off it by 12 weeks!

I've not been too bad symptoms wise, ice been feeling slightly nauseous in a morning and evening but other than that and being super tired! Any cravings for you?? Xx

@Ginandtonic31 do you have the Ovia app? It's quite cool, gives you stats and articles every day. Today is one about how symptoms sometimes just go away and it generally doesn't mean anything. Esp as you're approaching 12 weeks now. Your lunch sounds epic!!

@RRoonilWazlib I remembered but hadn't wanted to bring it up in case I'd mis-remembered. Didn't know it was Dads though; that makes me love it even more (I've got around 80% gay friends!)

I've not even got nausea anymore! Nothing! No cravings no. I just feel completely normal now. Only slight thing is I wake up about 6 needing a wee and I could go hours through the night before. Even my dreams are settling down. I just feel everything points to nothing happening. My mum keeps telling me though that she was the same with me and my brother. In fact she started being sick at 12 weeks with me. On holiday 😂

@RRoonilWazlib Amazing. Do they have a preference for a boy or girl (I know they won't mind I just wondered).

@KittyKatSmile do you recommend the ovia app? I have the flo app and I'm a bit unsure about it!

Yea, its 2 dads and they're bloody amazing!

@RRoonilWazlib did you know them before?

@Ginandtonic31I met them last year through an organisation. They're like part of the family now :)

@RRoonilWazlib yeah I quite like Ovia. I think I've had one of the other ones previously but I found the face of the baby a bit freaky (I feel the same way about 4d scans; no thank you!) It's cute and the baby turns into a different fruit every week which is nice.

@KittyKatSmile I will look. I've got What to Expect. But when it was about 5 weeks I was freaked by the baby with its long tail. I didn't like it. And also I was still struggling to get my head round it. This week I'm intrigued that it has elbows!

@Ginandtonic31 That's a good idea about trying to use all of your KIT days and tagging in a bit of AL. But yes, I guess you will just have to wait a bit longer to ask. All you can do is save what you can. I have heard some people save so they would have the same amount as if they were working, others save like £8k and not need it and one of my friends has just had a baby and doesn't even have maternity allowance as she hasn't worked for about 4 years!

@RRoonilWazlib Oh yes I think I remember somebody saying they were a surrogate but I think I missed that it was you. So sorry. That is absolutely amazing. May I ask, what made you decide to be a surrogate? So so lovely that you did it through an organisation too. AND for 2 dads!

@Zest11 I don't think we will have anything saved as I will have spent it on a holiday and doing stuff on the house! And we are going on holiday next October too (hopefully with a 6 month old). I think we will just get through it! I think of my calculations are correct I should be down about £400 a month. So I'm hoping I will survive!

So I moaned I had no symptoms and then threw up last night. The thing is I've got a dodgy tummy and headache with it and have all night so hardly slept. Is it a bug or is that normal for morning sickness?