BFP after IVF: any other nervous ladies in need of a handhold?

[wombats]

I've had my BFP after our first FET and in a bit of a state analysing symptoms/lack of symptoms. Had two losses prior to starting IVF so really can't get my head round what might be normal or not. Clinic will scan me at six weeks, but that is two very long weeks away! Anyone else in a similar position? xxx

Great news on your scan rational. You've made me want a pizza now too!

Becky sorry to hear about your stressful day. But glad your doc was being thorough and you got the all clear.

Wombats thanks for the reassuring statistic about miscarriage rates at this stage. Will keep trying to remember that when anxiety creeps in again.

Exciting to hear about midwife appointments, all feels very real. I've not even seen the GP yet to get referred, didn't want to jinx it before scan. Not sure about seeing the consultant instead of the midwife wombats, do you know why that is?

I will be seeing a consultant as well as midwife due to IVF, wombats. This was just an initial appt done at 8-10 weeks where they take loads of boring details etc. Will see consultant after 12 week scan. My IVF was at a different hospital to where we hope to deliver (cos they don’t have fertility unit there) so maybe that makes a difference. I’m now officially discharged from the fertility unit so that feels quite weird!

@bruges, I'm not quite sure, just was told I would need to see consultants because of IVF? Have you got your GP appointment yet?

@rational, I was told I "graduated" too! Exciting but terrifying, especially as I'm in limbo awaiting my next appt with a consultant.

I've had a bit of a wobble today, just not feeling terribly poorly and worried something's gone wrong. Nausea tends to be worst in the morning for me and eases by lunch but today was gone after breakfast. Also was having some cramps last couple days and now nothing today. My boobs are still huge, I'm knackered, and massively bloated/constipated, but otherwise wouldn't really know I was pregnant. I haven't got anymore scans booked yet and feeling a bit panicked. Anyone know when the next will be, once viability confirmed in fertility clinic?

@wombats I said to the nurse at the fertility clinic that I wasn't ready to be discharged and asked for another scan which they are giving me next Friday. She said that's fine but that they are not allowed to scan you past 10 weeks. After my scan next Friday will have to wait for 12 week scan. I'm terrified to be discharged from the fertility clinic, they have been so helpful, and I'm gonna need them if something bad happens xxx

Wombats sorry you’re feeling stressed, I’m sure I’d be the same. Symptoms can come and go though. How far along are you now?

I don’t have another NHS scan til 12 weeks but I’ve booked in for NIPT and that includes a scan, so that will be at 10 weeks. £400 (mostly for the test rather than the scan) but will be worth it for my sanity I hope. You could always try asking for a scan like becky or perhaps even pay for one if you’re able - there are plenty of private places that do them for around £50 so maybe worth considering if it would make you feel better.

Go easy on yourself and remember the chances are everything will be fine x

Thanks @becky, wish I'd thought of that. Unfortunately they told me I'm done there and to have all follow up with GP and consultants for antenatal care, now just awaiting GP referral.

@Rational, thanks for the reassurance. I'm 8+3 today, was told I'll have NIPT and nuchal scan on the NHS due to my age. Have been thinking about a private scan for reassurance this weekend or next, though I imagine I'll then just keep worrying until the next scan The anxiety is almost too much to bear right now! Especially as I woke today with energy, no nausea and dying for a flat white, been completely off coffee until today. I've been googling and apparently lots of women notice fewer symptoms at 8 weeks as the placenta starts to take over and HCG stabilises. Trying to take solace in statistics as well.

Hope everyone else is getting on well and feeling more relaxed and positive xxx

Hi wombats sorry to hear the anxiety is getting to you. I think we're pretty much exactly same stage and I've still got hardly any symptoms. The ones I have had are coming and going but alot of the time I feel completely normal. It's been like this ever since I got my BFP but the scan proved things have been growing as they should so I really think symptoms are a completely unreliable indication of what's happening, for better or worse!

I'm going to have NIPT test privately as don't qualify for it on NHS. Could have it anytime from 9 weeks but we've decided to wait until 10 weeks so will space out the scans more evenly. Ultimately scan will only reassure us for that day I think, just got to hope we're on the right side of the statistics now.

Saw my GP yesterday and been referred to see midwife and consultant in a few weeks. I've been discharged from fertility clinic too.

How is everyone else doing?x

Hi all!
wombats at about 8w my symptoms disappeared completely for 3 days, leaving me convinced something was wrong. But i had a planned scan and all was fine. The next day the symptoms returned with a vengeance. So I would say try not to obsess about it, symptoms come & go. My clinic said many women start to see less symptoms from 8-9w anyway.
I am going for a private NIPT too, as not sure if I qualify. I got my midwife appointment letter for 16th may, but they only offered me combined test, not NIPT, despite my advanced age (41)!
From tomorrow i start tapering off my medications. No more daily injections!

I'm not sure if I'm making the right decision here but I wasn't going to have a NIPT text because I would never change my mind about keeping the baby and if the results came back bad it would just cause me more anxiety, what do you think? I don't really know a lot about the test to be fair, just that it checks for downs. Xxxx

Hi becky.even though i have booked the test I am quite conflicted. After so many years & cycles, it seems heartbreaking to even consider. However it checks for edwards & patau’s too which are more dangerous conditions & mostly result in death either before or soon after birth. After my missed miscarriage, where i spent weeks blissfully unaware anything was wrong before having my heart wrenched out of me i dont think i could deal with that. But its completely a personal decision. I would like to know if there is a problem, though i haven’t completely decided what i would do if god forbid i get bad news. Perhaps discuss it with your midwife at the appointment and see how ypu feel after? X
wombats though i said try not yo worry, i know from personal experience how impossible it is, hope you are doing ok. X
Best wishes to all.

becky it’s a very personal decision and it is of course completely valid not to have screening if you don’t want to. A friend of mine had a baby with Edwards Syndrome last year and she died after a heartbreaking few months, so naturally it is particularly playing on my mind and I’m hoping for reassurance. Personally I would also rather know if our child has Down syndrome if only to prepare for the challenges of that. If you’re unsure and want more info then ARC also have good factual information about all of the screening tests on offer, NHS and private, and there are links to organisations that support families of people with all three conditions so I found that helpful to know about. Everyone is different though and you know best what you feel comfortable with.

I’m sure for any screening, whether NIPT or the combined test, you could ask to be told only the results for Edward’s and Patau’s, for example, if that’s what you wanted.
The prognoses for those two are so different from Down’s.

Hi all, thanks for the kind words and reassurance. You're all absolute stars.

Decaf, I've mixed it up, I would only have the integrated screen with nuchal scan and if high risk, then have NIPT. I've felt conflicted about the screening as well, as I'm sure I'd want to know and would likely do TMFMR but can't imagine if how I'd pick myself up after another loss.

Becky, you know best what you feel most comfortable with. some women would want to know the results to feel less anxious if it's all low risk and also to be able to prepare if there's any high risk shown. Has your partner got any strong feelings about it?

Rational your poor friend, I can't imagine the heartbreak

Dame, I believe you've just had your screening, was it the proper NIPT or the combined blood/nuchal scan test?

Bruges, yes I believe we're within a day or two of each other, really helps to know that you've had the same on and off symptoms.

Had a massive wobble this morning and cried to DH that I was nervous about a missed miscarriage, he was an absolute star. Ended up feeling quite ropey and nausea hit massively after lunch, hurrah. Will delay private scan for now, trying to focus on trusting statistics and working on some sort of inner peace to get me through the next weeks.

Positive thoughts to all xx

Hi all, bit late to this party, but can I join? I got my BFP after first round of ICIS. I'll be 9w tomorrow, and had last scan at ACS last week, where everything was a ok. I still feel it's all unreal as I've had virtually no symptoms apart from occasional nausea and some hot flushes. I have my first appointment with the local midwife in 2 weeks, and she'll book the 12 week scan, but I'm getting paranoid I'll have to wait longer as my midwife appointment is so late on (11w), and we're planning a 2 week holiday at that time

Anyway, sorry for rambling on, I look forward to getting to know you all better

Hello all,

Sorry I disappeared over the last few days due to scanxiety overload! My levels of googling were not healthy! We had our 8-week scan today and saw a very healthy heartbeat and everything measuring perfectly. It was amazing to see and looked much more like a baby than I was expecting. I think I had convinced myself there would be nothing there because of our six week scan. Just catching up on everyone’s news now. Sorry to hear the anxiety is back Wombats, I heard that too about symptoms subsiding around week 8-10 because of the placenta. Becky – hope you’re feeling better. Your cough sounded really nasty! Rational – congratulations on your scan good news too.Melanie - welcome to the group and congratulations on your BFP - it's all too easy to feel like you are imagining things at this early stage, think we all feel quite similar to you.

My sickness hasn’t been bad today and instead I have been starving all day and can't stop eating. This afternoon the period style cramps came back, however much I read that they are normal uterus-stretching pains, it still scares the hell out of me each time

I have been told to wait now until I hear about my booking in appointment date with the midwife and she will organise my 12-week scan. What age do you need to be to get NIPT on the NHS? x

Brilliant news on your scan Daisy, what a relief it is to see everything progressing well. I'm not sure about age for NIPT testing, I think it may vary according to where you live. From what I can see in my area it's only offered to people who have a high risk result on their standard screening at 12 weeks. So age doesn't necessarily come into it, although a woman is more likely to get a high risk result as she gets older.

Welcome Melanie and congratulations!

Congratulations Melanie and Daisy!
Wombats, I had both, the combined test and the NIPT (Panorama extended panel). Those and the scan really reduced my anxiety about the baby being OK. Now I only have to worry about something going wrong with me to endanger the pregnancy, and that’s pretty unpredictable and unavoidable.
The reason I did the NIPT was mostly just to have the information, it’s one unknown less.

@Melanie, welcome and congrats on the first scan. I've had hot and cold flushes too. Do you reckon you'll opt for any private testing?

Daisy, brilliant scan news and glad to see you back. The cramps scare me too, but I also get nervous when I haven't had any

Bruges, you're right-only the broad screening is offered on NHS and NIPT if you have a high risk result.

Dame, did you do the test for micro deletions as well as the basic Panorama? From what I can see, looks like Harmony and Panorama are the same but you can do Panorama at 9 weeks rather than 10.

Been reading a bit about testing and think I will do Harmony test only. The microdeletions are quite expensive and seem rare enough that probably not worth screening for. Any other thoughts on that?

Yes, we did the microdeletions but mostly out of indecisiveness.
I wanted to do the Panorama at 9 weeks but was advised by the testing place that many people who do it at 9w0d end up with an insufficient fetal fraction and have to go back and do the blood test. I asked whether those were more likely non-IVF pregnancies who didn’t have the dates quite right but they said they’d never thought of that.
I also didn’t do it at 9/10 weeks because I had convinced myself the pregnancy wouldn’t make it to 12, but that turned out to be unnecessary worry.
I don’t think there’s any difference between any of the NIPT tests. We did Harmony the first time round and it was fine. The results were faster than with Panorama.

Thanks Dame. Leaning towards doing the Harmony as rational shared the microdeletions may have more false positives. Also read that the conditions they test for are so rare that it's hard to actually validate the test. I'll probably do it around 10+5 (if I make it that far).

How's everyone else getting on?

Hi all!
melanie congrats and welcome!
daisy congrats! Hope you are feeling less anxious.
I have my NIPT bloods and scan planned for thrusday this week, will be 11w. Can feel the anxiety building already!
Desperately need to buy maternity trousers- my belly is pretty bloated & seems to get worse through the day. But i cant bring myself to buy any as i am terrified i’ll jinx the pregnancy. Normally i’m a rational practical person, but IVF has turned me into a superstitious mess!
Any of you buy maternity clothes yet?
Wish you all a happy Sunday & positive vibes! X

I’ve been wearing maternity trousers for two days and it’s such a relief. It’s not that I’ve got much of a bump but somehow my trousers pinch in exactly the wrong place. I couldn’t bring myself to buy them before 12 weeks though, so I totally understand the feeling. There was a great offer on at H&M which would have saved me twenty odd quid but it expired when I was 11 weeks so I didn’t use it.

Hello ladies,
I hope you have all had relaxing Sundays. I have done some reading on NIPT and other testing and think I am going to book in for the Harmony test. My hospital offers the combined test at my booking in appointment but from what I understand the accuracy isn't anywhere near as high as Harmony, and may end up causing me more worry. I think I would rather has as clear-cut findings as I can, although of course I know nothing will ever be 100 per cent accurate. The place i'm looking at offers the test, a scan and a nuchal scan two weeks later which looks like quite a good deal.

Re: maternity clothes - haven't bought anything yet but I am very bloated and find it very uncomfortable to wear tights at the moment and am not fitting into many of my clothes already. A friend also mentioned how buxom I was looking!

Hi everyone, hope you all had lovely weekends.

I've had a bit of a scare this morning because when I woke up at 6am to go to the loo had some dark brown discharge when I wiped. Totally panicked because had no spotting, bleeding or anything during any of my IVF cycles until after I stopped progesterone. Anyway had few more streaks of dark brown (sorry TMI) but now seems to have stopped.

I've left a message with my clinic to call me back for some advice, but think it may just be a case of wait and see if it starts again. Stressful!

Oh Bruges, sorry you've had a scare. I've heard it's quite normal to have spotting and brown is old blood so hopefully nothing. Sending a handhold and please let us know what your clinic says x