IVF - A supportive group of ladies at various stages of the ivf journey.

[Dbear35]

A super group of women supporting each other and sharing their personal journeys and experiences during the IVF processs. All are welcome !

Haha Minster yeah I can see, you struggling to get through the evening 😅 nice tree! Mine is still without decoration as we left them with FIL when moved here 😤 that’s 1.5 hour away and car in repair 😡

I would get really annoyed if someone starts questioning things like “where r the kids going to be during treatment” “none of your business!!” I remember I had hard time from customer abt leaving my dog alone all day. She is rich and not working and sorry I have to slave away to pay bills. I wanted to slap her.
Also when I asked abt this presents for clients, I couldn’t understand how is it you problem 😅 I take it your OH is the one who running it? Then this would make more sense
Have you come up with big announcement idea?

How’s everyone this morning?

Minster am fine am not bleeding etc am just worried dat a myt cz ma last FET a started bleeding around dis tym (5week) x

Yeah it was quite tough Aliona the questions they asked for the ethics committee & very frustrating...like “what would happen if I got sick and we had a baby? Who would look after it...er, DH, same as for any other couple where someone gets ill?!” My parents & PIL live 20 mins away as do more family & friends so we have the best support network ever, FH runs his family company so can time off when he needs so we are in THE best place ever to raise a child, no one in normal life has to justify it the way we did. Was so frustrating. They had the power to say no to doing the IVF. Our dreams in their hands. Luckily it was ok but like you say, none of your business, who looks after your child when you are ill counsellor???

But they have to check the welfare of any potential child born as a result of IVF/surrogacy so steps we had to go through 🙄that’s why it’s so hard to do

Get some decorations!! You can’t have a naked tree!!🎄

+atik I’m so pleased you are ok, you went quiet!!

Oh and yes we have come up with the big reveal but I’m working on the execution of it as it will involve some Christmas crafting and I want to wait until after our 7 week scan on Monday to check all is ok first so watch this space!

Minster grrr I am getting annoyed even hearing about that. Sorry imagine if woman gets pregnant and then has someone making decision if she is capable of looking after baby or not. Sorry!! People get ill and even die all the time, what the hell?!?! We had to fill some forms asking questions about our mental health and 💩 like that but how can they know? I don’t have family here and OH only in touch with dad who is unwell so who’s gonna look after my child when I am ill? Do I have to put my life in hold now?
FH 😂😂😂 I really tried to figure this one out but nothing comes to mind apart from famous F word 😅😅😅 he must have done something wrong today lol

Sorry it was meant to be DH, DH runs family business so he can take time out if I’m ill or to come to important appointments with me as he’s the boss and there’s his dad who can come back out of retirement if I get really ill and he needs more support

Precisely, we have both sets of grandparents within 20 mins retired who would be over the moon to help, his sister also, his brother with 45mins & DSIL I mean we are in an amazing position but have to prove we can care for a child & I wasn’t offered standard chemo egg freezing. Pah

Minster 10 year ago I wanted to adopt a dog for my ex-husband so went to a charity stuff around where I lived at the time. After 4 hours they told us we can have a dog bla bla bla they have to come and see our house bla bla bla....I was like "Excuse me? You have wasted 4 hours of my time. These dogs will be better with me any time, than in these horrible kennels. I ddi not want to buy my dog as I prefer to give to charity, but since you are a bunch of total morons, I am going to have to. Your loss, I was happy to part with a good some of money as I love animals". She looked at me totally surprised, then I said to my ex let's go, by the end of the day you will get your dog and he did!!! We got a black lab!

I know it isn't the same thing, but the system can be totally shit and unhelpful. You have aright like everybody else, end of the story ! This is outrageous!

I would like to share with you that I am in great spirit , but so very tired. Going for a long meditation tonight.

Speak later lovely ladies XXX

PS: Yes I ma feeling better, thank you for all of your kind words, you are very precious XXX

I agree with you about the dogs too star it’s ridiculous! It’s also the same that we are ruled out of adoption or fostering children as my illness is staged as terminal though with this new treatment who knows how many years I have? So I get an automatic fail for adoption. It was something MIL was saying to me the other day, it’s crazy, DH as a single man can adopt or foster, but with me, married for 2 Years, together 5, stable home, House, lots of love to give, family around, I rule us out. So when ppl say to us “why don’t you adopt” er “I can’t I’m too ill...you don’t look ill...no, my treatment keeps me perfectly healthy 😡😡😡😩😫😤work that out”

And soooo glad you are feeling good darling xx

Hey everyone, hope you are all having a nice Saturday?

We have our tree up- it's starting to feel festive! 🎄

As well as feeling festive, I also feel really sick. Is this the start of morning sickness? More like all day sickness! 😨

Hope everyone is well and warm

Happy Saturday everyone! X

Rose hey 👋🏼 I know 😅 I always was thinking that. Why the hell its called morning sickness when u nauseous all day long?!
My tree still has no decorations but we bought some lights so will be on to it today 🌲➡️🎄
How’s everyone?!? Star still in great spirit?!?
Dbear hangover after night out in Brixton?! 😅

Morning everyone, from my bed! I have a cat on my belly and another on my feet. This is a sign that today is a duvet day, right??

I’m still feeling wretched. I still have the worst nausea, and I’m now 12.1 weeks... where is this promised land of no-nausea that everyone said would come after 12 weeks?? Lies I tell you, it’s all lies!!!

Now that I’ve stopped being melodramatic, how is everyone?? Rose I’m sorry you’re also feeling ill :( It’s the pits. I hope yours passes soon!!

I have to paint a hallway today... wish me luck. The plus side, if we get it done, is that we should have a semi-non-building site room to decorate for Christmas!

❤️❤️❤️❄️❄️❄️

P.S. No proper snow here. Poop :(

Good morning

Dinks sorry to hear you aren't feeling well. But glad you are getting a cat cuddle. I have my two cats with me on the sofa. They are so lazy and spoilt.

My sickness does not sound anywhere near as bad as yours. I just get waves of nausea, and I now have an aversion to anything remotely gross. One of the children was eating with their mouth open yesterday, which I normally just find a bit annoying and I remind them to eat with their mouth closed, but yesterday I had to leap up from the table as I thought I was going to throw up. I also feel completely exhausted and struggle to stay awake beyond 10pm - i've become a complete party pooper, I made my OH leave a dinner party last night at about 10.30pm as i couldn't stay awake. What a rock and roll life :)

Good luck with your DIY! We are having a diy weekend, although I'm on the sofa with the cats drinking tea and ordering christmas presents. One perk of being pregnant is getting out of diy! :) xx

Good morning people! I was going to go out and get some xmas shopping done and then this happens ❄️❄️ So yes Dinks, defo duvet day for me. Went for a walk and at 8.30 Park was full of kids and dogs.
Why r you ladies so keen on decorating? Stay away from that. Let your men get on with painting 😤

Rose Cat cuddles are the best!! Except my boy cat hates it when I speak so I have to be silent when he is on my belly. He’s fine with OH’s voice, not mine... Misogynistic little bugger.

Aliona In our house, if anything has to get done I have to make it get done. OH likes to potter, and research the best ways to paint. I grab a paintbrush and just do it. But then he is an academic, and I am a project manager lol.

I’m jealous of the snow Aliona!! It snowed here on Thursday, then it froze... and hasn’t thawed since. So we just have an ice rink :(

P.S. Rose I also get sick from random things. At the minute the log burner makes me sick. Literally no idea how that works.

Wow aliona look at that!!! Amazing!! Look at how happy your dog is!! Natural habitat!! And your tree has decorations, yay!

We having had much snow here, a fine dusting then a bit more whilst I was out walking, which tbh is fine for me as it doesn’t clog the roads up but still looks pretty long as it doesn’t get like an ice rink!

I’ve also been basically hibernating today as I somehow managed to scratch my eye in the night & woke up half blind!

Damn dinks I was hoping the nausea passes for my friend as she’s currently throwing up quite bad each day, I have said I find it reassuring (as she does) that hopefully little B is really there & doing something!!

We have our 7 week scan tomorrow and it will be when DH gets to be there & see, sooo excited as is he but also still worried, will be so much better after that I think (or am I just deluded we all still worry??)

dinks have you told ppl yet?

dbear how you getting on now AF has arrived, are you then waiting for day 21 now? Are you eating all the nice stuff over Christmas or staying clear?

I had a day of wrapping presents like a maniac yesterday but that’s done so roll on 🎄🎄

Minster Your poor friend! I got medication to stop the throwing up, but it doesn’t do anything to help the nausea, and bonus acid reflux that I get because I have a stomach ulcer. I had a lovely GP who understood that we won’t get a badge for enduring morning sickness unmedicated! Hope your friend can try her GP for help?

7 week scan is soooo exciting!! That has come around so fast. I was really nervous before mine, I think it’s normal. Now I have nerves building for the 12 week scan too... I think we all just worry

We have told immediate family, and a few of my close friends know, but mainly as I was running out of lies for why I couldn’t see them!! Once we get screening safely out of the way we’ll probably tel the world 😂

Good grief you’re early with the wrapping!! I just did the christmas shopping last week... it should start arriving this week (did it all online.)

Hope you have a lovely relaxing evening away from sellotape!!

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I might ask my friend about the GP, the thing is half the time I don’t think she tells me how bad it is because she doesn’t want me to feel bad that it’s “our fault” and she knows I would do anything to have the sickness instead so sometimes it’s just passing comments!!

I have been organised with wrapping stuff as I was very organised buying Xmas presents during 2ww to keep me busy and with DH away it’s passed the time and made me feel all festive (& stopped me obsessing over baby stuff pre scan!) once the scan is done I will allow myself to make the things to tell ppl...that’s the thing with it not being me pregnant in theory we could hide it for weeks but when my friend was bleeding both DH & I found it hard not talking to our families so as it would be 9 weeks at Xmas (& my parents then away until 12 weeks) we want that time with closest family knowing to share excitement but also have support if something goes wrong during that time it’s been sooooo hard! But yes if ppl saw me not drinking the game would be up immediately!!

We have booked a private scan for 21st just to check so we’ll have one at 8.5 weeks too, rose I think gets one from her clinic but we don’t so that will massively reassure us too....groupon are doing some cheap ones if you could do that??!

When did you stop the progesterone by the way/pessaries? I’m a bit worried about the medication stopping

Good evening Ladies!!

Wow what a busy few days it's been!

The gig was great I always liked Brixon, but I wasn't hung over aliona I had a couple of vinos but I hate travelling back on the train on my own, I like to have my wits about me!

minster thanks for the potato tips let me know how the first batch goes (im sure they will be amazing!). Sorry to hear you friend is struggling with morning sickness but I would be like you and think it's a positive sign that everything this is great! ...God your xmas is going to be soooo special with telling your family ! 7 wk scan tomorrow ...that's flown by !

Aliona I am sooo Jealous of your snow!! we didn't get any! We had slushy sleet for an hour , xmas tree looks great I have just finally finished ours!

Star how are you my lovely? how was the long meditation? xx

dinks rose sorry to hear you are still both suffering with sickness, but it's all for the greater good. Im sure you've tried all the things under the sun to ease it but hopefully it wont be forever ladies just keep chilled and enjoy the duvet days.

atik How are you doing sweetie?

My AF is due to leave tomorrow so now just waiting on my Day 21 to start the meds, which by my calculations should start on Dec 28th!
Hence my NYE celebrations will be a quiet affair, the med really effect my mood I can be horrible on them so best I stay home.

In regards to diet over the festive period I think I will have the odd treat, maybe a bit of blue cheese and vino but nothing over the top. Anyone have any tips on what to eat before /after FET?

I have 9 days left of work and then I'm off until 3rd Jan whoop this makes me soooo happy!!

It's freezing.... Ma boobiese sooo hurt, am soo bloated Ave got activia yogurt nd actimel bt don't know if it's safe for me... A heard sum of yogurts are not... Basically a counting days till ma first scan wich is on the 18th

Sounds like you’ve done a great job with Christmas!! Even if it was to keep yourself busy :) I hear you on telling people... I have only told the people I know will support us regardless if I have a wobble, or need a favour. I think that applies whether you’re carrying a baby or a surrogate is. It’s such an emotional time. Moreso for you as you’ve been ill, too. A real rollercoaster.

I have my 12 week scan on Friday!! Eeek!!! I’ll be 13 weeks by then but still in time for all the screening tests. I definitely think there will be many many reassurance scans after that!!

I had progesterone injections (in the butt...ouch) and stopped them about 10 days ago. I’ve not noticed any difference at all to be honest. The bleeding incident started a few days before that, but the clinic weren’t concerned about me finishing the progesterone. I’m still spotting (had more than spotting today, I guess because I’ve been up and about painting all afternoon??) but I don’t think that is progesterone related. I believe once the placenta has formed it produces its own progesterone, so we don’t need any extra by then! (Thank heavens! My butt is literally bruised everywhere!!)

A little bit of xmas in Surrey !

Dbear b4 FET a started take pregnacare nd everyday a had pineapple with the core nd pomegranate juice nd brasil nuts nd too much vegetables, fish etc nd a was put everyday for abt 40 min a heating pad on ma stomach a fink dats helped with the nyc lining