IVF SEP/OCT Part 2- Get your Stretchy Leggings here ladies!

[Minster2012]

IVF buddies September /October continued, heading into November & wearing VERY comfy stretchy leggings & trousers (perfect for Xmas too!!)

rose glad it went well and you have been (not so?) chilling out by the fire!! Sounds lovely, we’ve not fired up our log burner yet & im sorely tempted now!!

One hatched blasto in that sounds awesome! I’ve totally never thought about being pregnant more than you’ve ever been now, but you’re absolutely right! Weirdly that makes me the most pregnant I’ve ever been & yet I’m still on full contraception 🤣🤣

When is your test day then? Is it the same as us?! Or a day behind! How exciting!!

Lots of 💕& positive thoughts for blasto!

I'm a soft southerner who can't cope with the NE cold so have had our log burner and open fire on loads. You sound like your made of sturdier stuff though minster 😃

We are testing on the 23rd. Is that the day after you?

Xx

Hello ladies!!!

Sorry I’ve been so bad at checking in with you all. So much to catch up on!!

Minster Sounds like a really really crappy evening, not surprised you were totally bummed about it. How are you feeling today? Hope the frozen pizza did the trick?? Honestly I think you must be superwoman to deal with everything you do... You have to have moments when you are allowed to crack. I hope lots of puppy cuddles help? Thinking of you!! And have everything crossed for your embie too.

Other than two friends (one in Scotland and one in NYC) I have told nobody about the IVF. Oh and my boss knows. I can’t be bothered talking about it... the why we needed IVF, the “ooh you’ll have triplets!!”, the “hmm this is what happens when you put your career first, just think, more people could be getting hip replacements if you had children earlier...” (actually was said to a friend of mine who had IVF a few years ago)

I haven’t decided if we’ll tell family later. What are you guys all doing?? It’s nobodys business I guess... I guess Minster people will notice if you haven’t been visibly pregnant but then turn up with a baby? Unless you say you borrowed it, or have a bet to see what reasons you can get away with 😂

Rose Yay to ET!!! I hope you are taking it easy and definitely not painting lol!! I had a WTF moment with our eggs too, as we started with 24 eggs and got 2 blasts, one now hopefully kidney bean sized and the other on ice. There are average rates but there is so much random variation. It only takes the one :) I have everything crossed for you!!

Dbear How are you doing?? I am so sorry for the BFN. You should def test tomorrow, and you have a good number of frosties too if I remember? Like Aliona said, the grading is only visual, some embryos are destined to stop growing no matter how perfect they look. I am thinking of you and sending lots of love and strength.

I know I am missing people, but I am so tired my brain is full of fog. The sickness is starting to creep back, along with acid reflux. Also getting lots of migraines. I genuinely wonder how the human race has survived for so long, because pregnancy really is shit. Again, please don’t be upset and think I’m not grateful - I am truly in awe of medical science for getting me to this stage. Just....bleurgh. Nausea is exhausting.

Anyhoo!! I am going to take a nap while OH watches the rugby (go Wales!!). Log burner on here too!! When we first moved down from Scotland we were all “omg it’s sooo warm” but now I’ve got used to it I’m back to being freezing lol.

Aliona, Star, sorry I’ve missed your updates. Hope you’re both ok?? Star I honestly don’t know how you manage such an exciting, action packed life!! Even before IVF I couldn’t wait to get home from work and get into my PJs lol. Aliona your appt has come around quite quickly!! Fingers crossed they have their act together and everything becomes crystal clear about the next steps!!

❤️❤️❤️ to everyone

Rose glad it went well and u was giggling away ❤️

Dinks no one is upset with u. You pregnant ok. We all hoping for this blessing but doesn’t mean it’s ok to feel sick and you have to suck it up and be quiet. Stop worrying about upsetting anyone.

As for telling anyone. Well my boss knew and some of my friends here. Also my sister knows, but not mum. Even week I have over the phone “I don’t have grandkids. When am I going to have grandkids” so if I do say-omg I won’t have a minute of peace. Also don’t want to upset her if it doesn’t work.
My cousin had ivf 10 years ago, still now older generation think their twins are someone else’s kids. They just can’t get their head around it. Doctors help-means kids are not theirs. So I prefer to keep it to myself

rose I have A LOT of jumpers and recently have basically been sat in a coat to take puppy out at least once an hour so seemed pointess 2 put burner on! (Also DH only sorted logs out this week so next week there WILL be fire!!) yes we are testing on 22nd so u are a day behind! Awesome!! It’s going to be emotional, it’s our 5yr “being together anniversary” on day of testing, then DH’s birthday on 23rd where we have a meal for 2 booked. Either double celebration or slightly muted after getting over bad news day before 🙄.

Totally agree that dinks we need u as our inspiration! Don’t worry I feel shit, my friend is in her 2nd pregnancy, due Dec, & has had it rough both times, Uber sickness, huge babies, bad labour, hates being pregnant. Now has gestational diabetes. Terrible. Some ppl pregnancy does not agree with. She hates complaining in front of me but I tell her not to be so stupid! We know u wouldn’t change it so don’t be silly!

Ooooo I love the idea of trying to see what I can get away with saying!! My favourite thing to do is usually is to blatantly challenge people when they find out I’m “ill or have cancer” as that usually shuts them up like....me “oh yeah I have stage 4 Cancer that’s why I’m here”..... them “oh god, oh well....(big pause.....) you don’t look ill” me “no, I don’t, I’m lucky like that, bye then”

So I could be like them... “and who’s this then?” ...me “this is my child X”, them... “oh, I didn’t realise you were pregnant?” Me “I wasn’t, my best friend was” them “wtf??” Me “well, that really, my best friend was pregnant with our child, bye then!” 😱🤣😁

I can’t see a problem with that in a very small village that gossip goes round like wildfire???!!!

Oh and aliona I get the whole when are you going to have kids thing from people in the wider family who assume now that I’m “not immediately dying” I must be ok so I can only imagine how bad it is for other people so it must be awful aliona

rose how r u guns handel De full bladder thing lol

But it does suck when people constantly saying things. My cousins twins now 10 and yet half of family (older ones) still think babies not theirs. Wtf? I personally get very upset. Even innocent “when you have a baby you will understand” from a friend makes me go crazy. So I don’t even want to imagine how you going to handle all the explanation. I guess they can ... if they can’t undertand 🙃

How r you atik? Feeing better?

atik my friend was trying not to giggle too much in case she had a nervous pee!! I made it worse by saying just before we went into the procedure room “I can go for a nervous wee!”

aliona that’s horrible for your cousin, how heartless, older ppl really can be cruel. My DH’s cousin put on fb just after we were engaged (when I was just diagnosed & he had proposed thinking I had about a year or 2 to live) as he was holding her new baby saying “he’s a natural, he’ll make a great father” & tagged me when he was visiting them, I was inconsolable, floods of tears on my own looking at it thinking “yes he would but he wants to marry someone who is taking that chance away from him”, people don’t think before they speak or they assume everything is the same for everyone. 1 in 8 couples experience infertility but its such a taboo. Heartbreaking 💕💔

If we reach the stage of announcing a pregnancy I will point this out because we cannot avoid making it “a thing” where a child has come from & I think ppl need to know sometimes it’s not all romance & flowers sometimes it’s bloody hard work & stress & pain!

Minster2012 😢😢 that’s bad..and bravo for fighting for that chance to have a baby of your own ❤️ I had old lady-customer lecturing me on fact that I am not getting younger and what am I waiting for and shaking her head at me.. it was few days after I miacarried.. u should see me at that point. Customer service?! 😅 nope! Never heard of it.

Good morning everybody!!

What a splendid day! Cold but splendid nevertheless....

I have told only a few individuals about our procedure. In my opinion the less the better. I have to say, and I know it wil sound sound elegant whatsoever - BUT I couldn't give a monkey's what people think. What with my age people would and will have plenty to say PLUS OH is 10 years younger, but do I care? Nope. I am happy and don't allow people to dictate what I should or should not do. Hence the reason I shared my news with people who, I trust, won't criticise but be happy for us. I believe to have a good compass and know who to trust. It comes with age but also with my practice I guess. Last time somebody interfered with my private life at work I asked " excuse me but have I asked for your opinion?" She went while blue yellow and then I said "yes that's what I thought" and end of the story. Anyway people know not to mess with me 😂😂😂😂😂. My view is if you don't care about who I am and what I really care about who are you to meddle with my life? We all have opinions but if I don't interfere with yours stay away from judging mine. Yes Minster life is tough sometimes and bless you you have had a fair share to go through so I wouldn't ponder too much on these "concierge" because they always somebody to target. You know why? Because they are escaping their own life. Because something is not right in their own life, but they pretend all is Rosie. You have a chance at a wonderful opportunity here, you have an amazing OH, a divine best friend - this is the truth, your truth and we all agree on here it is beautiful. Why do we all agree? Because we have all opened our heart completely. Isn't this beautiful? Do you really think these vipers speak with an open heart when they criticise you? No, not at all, quite the oppososite. So who cares? Bless your path and your story. I wouldn't change a thing, because it is raw, special and yours. I would only discern who is WORTHY of knowing it or not. The rest who cares?

Aliona I don't know your age but I am probably the eldest on here. Who cares? We are women on a mission who are sharing experiences,notes, support and understanding. Members of my family who believe they have a say on everything don't have a flipping clue of my plans, simples.

I had a good diner party yesterday evening but now a lot to clean befor my afternoon tea with my girlfriends 😜.

Be good to yourselves, we see life with a glass half full knowing full well that there is the other side, other people see life in a different way. This is duality.

I am feeling my AF coming very soon...it will be soon my turn to share with you, my own experience and feel blessed to have you all, truly.

Lots of love to all and have a wonderful day! 😘😘😘

aliona still Lil bit ill yet, having ma app tomorrow hope the lining not shrink xxx wen u going to start?

Minster keeping full bladder it's scare me a hv rly bad trauma at dat lol one tym they told me to hv full bladder for sum scan so a started drink water der cz a special came earlier nd doctor called me earlier than ma app nd a told her ma bladder not full yet even tho a drank 8glassed of water so she sed we need make app for next month loll so a went out nd then a felt ma bladder full a came bk BT fast BT she sed it's too late now... So went pee nd den to bus... Nd dat bus didn't had any stops in between... Nd a had full bladder again! A luk try Windows nd der longggggg traffic a nearly stated cry cz or a guna pee ma self or a guna pee in bus nd pay fo it lol BT nyc driver woman understood ma situation nd lemme came out near town wer a was cn find toilet... BT dat was a nytmare... Same on last transfer a made ma bladder toooo full nd a felt like a cnt go fo transfer nd nurse sed to me to pee Lil bit... A asked her to show me how it's dat lol so nw wen am guna hv transfer am just scared awwww

Morning all

Thinking of you Dbear xx

Star very wise words from you. I do say same things to my friends but for some reason can’t apply them to myself 🤔 ex colleague from work texted saying “I heard u left work”. Really? News travel fast. And I shouldn’t care but I know they saying things about me which not truth. I treated them like family and now I have to listen to 💩 I should say to myself “who cares” but can’t do that. You have very good energy and wise thinking. Send them my way 😄

Atik made me laugh with your story 😆 been there! On the bus with full bladder. Then got off and was walking home and only houses around. I was so desperate I was gonna just knock on people’s door and didn’t care about anyone. And last winter I was back home in the car traveling on motorway. I had urine infection and I was in tears I couldn’t hold it any longer. Horrible feeling 😩 desperation through the roof. Stopped at little shopping Center and big sign saying “mc D” on 3 floor. I run there and guess what? It was like walk through one, no sitting inside and no toilet. Bad times 😅
I will know more on Friday what’s happening with me )

Sod the world aliona if anyone else texts you say “yes thank you I’m very much enjoying taking some time out & focussing on myself” or maybe like star “I’m taking some time out at the minute, focussing on my inner beauty, plan to do lots of yoga, go to a silent retreat then stuff myself at Christmas!” 🤣😁

I think we’ve all been caught short needing the loo at some point!

Minster 😂 me and yoga? They will definitely spread the rumours that I have gone mad 😅 maybe stuffing myself sounds more realistic.. it’s beeakfast time 🙃

Roaring fire in log burner now, soup & the paper, horrible wind & rain outside, not entirely sure I’m going to be moving much this afternoon (do have outside stuff to do though 🙁) just ordered 2 Christmas presents too, online shopping is much more appealing than outside stuff!

Minster2012 But sometimes whatever arrives looks shocking 😅 but u right about wind, crazy windy and cold. Although Sun is shining here. And it’s many month of this ahead 😭😭
How’s your friend? In touch every minute of the day? 🙃

Hello all and especially RoseWrites. Your story could be mine, ET yesterday and 1 blast as well. Feeling crampy today which makes me very worried. This is our 3rd cycle and last cycle I was very down after AF only a week into the Tww. Trying to keep the hope up but back to work tomorrow with high stress level too :(

Afternoon all :)

You'll be pleased to know that i am not painting or doing any form of DIY!

I did some very low energy jobs this morning (i.e. sit down and pretend to clean some plates as people flitted around, and then made some cups of tea). My OH just suggested I paint some cupboards, so out of earshot of his parents I said I can't, so I'm now wrapped up under a blanket pretending to "do some work".... annoyingly I can't get the TV to work, otherwise my chilled afternoon would be perfect!

Glad you've got your fire on Minster, I bet the pup loves it!

Dinks hope you're feeling a bit better today? In answer to your question, only a few people know we are doing IVF - my sister, a few of my friends, and then maybe 3 of our mutual friends. No parents, or other family or friends know. Nor do any work colleagues etc. When we first knew we had to have IVF I didn't want ANYONE to know - I think i was massively in denial and wanted to pretend it wasn't happening, and also I couldn't bear the thought of it not working and people being sympathetic/patronising. I'm still not great with that prospect, but it has definitely been helpful to tell a few really close friends. And they have been lovely, one has booked a masseuse to come to the house and another one keeps sending me super cute cards and parcels of treats and presents.

Star hear hear! you are so bloody wise! Bravo :)

WhatWot welcome! I hope you are feeling a bit less crampy now?

I promised my nurse and my OH that I wouldn't google symptoms in the 2WW, so I don't have a clue what is a good sign, or not. I had the worse pains yesterday, it felt like an alien was borrowing through my insides... I don't feel anything today. Is either good? All i want to know is HOW SHOULD I FEEL IF THIS HAS WORKED?

Sweet Jesus this is going to be a long wait! Only 11 more days to go...!!!

whatwot hello! We have another in 2ww! Yay! Let’s hope 3rd time lucky!

I’m trying not to google but it’s easier for me without symptoms!! Noaliona we agreed that my friend only tells me big symptom stuff like the first cramps were new & different but I’m not asking how crampy she is now (autocorrect just changed that to cranky, might be accurate!!) & if she has spotting for instance. Otherwise it will drive us both mad. However she phoned yesterday 4 a rant as she had to have more tablets sent through post from clinic & missed the delivery, only had enough left for last night, when she went to post office it kept saying “item not found” & the guy was saying “come back tomorrow & we’ll have a look for it”...my friend was nearly shouting going “u don’t understand, I NEED that package, it’s not gloves or anything, this could be LIFE OR DEATH!” he wasn’t amused. She was on the phone to the emergency IVF nurse when the guy waved the package at her after they found it. I would not have wanted to be there, angry hormonal woman ranting wanting her drugs 🤣🤣🤣😱😱

And rose I’m so glad you aren’t painting, did you come up with an excuse??

Minster so glad your friend got her drugs! There is enough to think about without having to deal with post office cock-ups! :)

You are doing really well not to ask your friend about every symptom. I think I'd have turned into a crazed stalker by now....!

I haven't come up with an excuse really, I just said I had some work to do. As I work for myself, this isn't wholly untrue. However, I have a strict rule that I never work evenings or weekends, so it is a bit out of character for me to be sat with my laptop and a pile of papers on a Sunday... little do they know that I'm actually Christmas shopping and writing stuff on here!

I think my OH would love to tell his parents we are doing IVF. I obviously can't tell him what to do, but I have said that I'd rather he didn't to limit the number of people who know, and also because it seems unfair as I haven't told my mum...

However, his parents know he has had a vasectomy so they might be a bit bemused if I am pregnant, so we may have to tell them at some point!

xx

I know, we’re all just pleased she got the drugs too! We do have a running joke of just saying “are you pregnant yet?” And she says “maybe!” Then we just talk normally. I don’t think we’d get through the days otherwise, we are all trying not to think about it to wish away the days.

How on earth does it work if he’s had a vasectomy rose???

My afternoon tea with girlfriends 😜