Thread 32 | TTC#1 | Making the move from conception to infertility. We've taken some blows but we are not beaten

[Jamon]

Hi all. We're a group of first timers who've been plugging away on the conception boards for some time. The support here is amazing so if you're in a similar boat please jump onboard.

Time to hand hold through treatments and support each other through to becoming the mums we deserve to be 💪🏼🌸🙏🏼

Morning ladies! Just wanted to check in and say hi!

kwick great news on your lining! Spain here you come! 🌞

pjs gave you a follow last night! Good luck for the interview! 🙌

Hiya and hugs to everyone!! I’m shite at keeping up with this thread! 🌚

So had our appt this morning no longer iui going straight for icsi on doses of 300 due to my low amh. Start Jan. nervous excited and apprehensive. Had a wobble of “what if this is Mother Nature way of saying we’d be shit parents....” have more or less snapped out of that. Positive pants on!

Hello all,

Good to hear everyones news. I'm doing my usual 3 month post! To cut a long story short DH and I have our first fertility appt next week. We had 3 months where we did not manage to have sex hardly at all. He feels so much pressure to finish that he can't finish, its incredibly frustrating. We get one cycle of IVF here, so I'm not confident. Looking into surrogacy...bit early for that but after 27 cycles I'm getting desperate.

Kwick Good luck with Spain!

Jam I'll be cheering you on FX you won't be able to drink on xmas day :D

pjs I followed you on Twitter, great account. Found the fertility podcast and finding it really helpful.

Can't keep up at the moment this thread is moving so quickly!

Hello again alice, sorry you are still in the same boat, I sympathise with the lack of sex thing. For the last two cycles we've only managed 2 or 3 times in total, and whilst they've been in fw I still don't feel its enough. DH struggles with his libido and can't do it when he's hungry/too full/too tired/too stressed ...its really started to get on my nerves!

plane we also start icsi in jan (end of), although long protocol so actual EC likely to be end of Feb

Good job on the lining kwick!

pj what is your Twitter? I don't 'do' Twitter but might attempt it!

Well done for snapping out of it planeglazer - plenty of fertiles are absolutely horrendous parents so I’m sure there’s no correlation!

kwick that’s exciting about Spain!

I just watched this YouTube comedy series about a couple having ivf, really recommend it! There’s ten episodes and they’re only 5 or 6 mins each

m.youtube.com/watch?v=3xzcazWs3W0

Thanks for asking about how I’m doing chlo - it doesn’t now look like I’ll be able to have iui as our hospital hasn’t got appointments. Back to limbo land I go.

Hi Ladies,

Checking in again! I keep falling off this thread as it moves so quickly but love the chat - its a very positive thread without too many hearts, flowers or optimistic arsehole tendencies...

Very excited that some of you are in the midst of treatment - Jam, Kwick, struggle and hoping for some good news soon!

PJs absolutely love your drive to get fertility discussions going in the media. I wish I was as brave as you! Very best of luck for the job interviews. It sounds like an amazing opportunity... I'm not sure I know what the third sector is either though?!

Welcome passthewine

As for me, not much to tell really! Concerned this is an anovulatory cycle as I've not had a static smiley this month and I'm on CD19 - very usual for me! We had our info. evening at the FC last night and it was good, obviously no new information but good to get the information again in the context of our clinic - because we live in the arse-end of nowhere in Scotland our clinic options are so limited! Really only one option - not sure if that makes things easier or harder! We have a consultation next week so will see how that goes - can't decide whether it would be better to just go for it and start treatment or whether we should try naturally for a few more months...

Dame Pyjamas I am following you on Twitter now!!! I am ladulcekaren 💓
I actually have a dummies guide to Tweeting as I really do not get it #silentgeneration but have not got round to reading 😔

Ah thanks everyone for the follows!! My handle is @mcwombface winging

Third sector is the not for profit/charity sector - basically the opposite of where I am now!

Will have a proper catch up tomorrow after this interview is out of the way (have to prepare tonight, haven’t even had time to think about it!)

But wanted to update everyone on the latest - had appt with Dr Ramsay (urologist) and turns out Tom had high white blood cells in his semen, suggesting a response to some sort of inflammation. So, he’s prescribed him a course of antibiotics for 19 days then had to go and have DNA fragmentation test next month to see if it’s cleared up the issue! He also said there’s no reason at all we would need IMSI or ICSI for that matter once it’s cleared up as his speed count and motility is excellent and has even improved since the last test. So, we’ve decided to go for straight IVF if this is all cleared up! Can’t believe this wasn’t picked up before - but I shall continue banging that drum!!

That's amazing pyjamas! I remember googling Dr Ramsay and someone had posted something similar and said all it took was a course of antibiotics to clear up an underlying infection their DH had and then they conceived naturally soon after. You read these things and think can this be true but now we know a lot more about it, it can be (shockingly) that simple. That's brilliant that it's now been picked up and you can sort it. Good luck prepping tonight and good luck for the interview.

Going to watch those clips kerry, a bit of humour about the whole situ is definitely in order. Sorry to hear the clinic can't fit you in. Will you wait for another round of IUI or go straight to IVF? Hopefully you can get some sort of plan in order so that you don't feel like you're just waiting around.

plane I've had those thoughts too but then I think the flip side is that if we're prepared to go through all of this, then it just shows how committed to it we already are.

kwick good luck for Spain!

Thanks Chlo - I’m not sure but timing wise ivf will be here by the time we could probably get in for another iui. I guess I have to just look at this as a break from it all

Good luck tomorrow pyjamas - I am a third sector/twilight zone dweller and would encourage you to come aboard - it sounds like an amazing opportunity but go with your gut..plenty of people take jobs and then get pregnant accidentally - I think we all feel much more guilty because of IVF!

I’ll catch up with all the other news tomorrow - sister in law is staying and just had to dash upstairs to do injections in record time - think I got away with it. Feeling a bit anxious about the scan tomorrow - hoping the bloating isn’t psychosomatic and something is actually happening!

Right - I’ve prepared as much as I want to (I work best in interviews when I haven’t over-prepared) so time to catch up here before the thread runs away from me again!

I don’t do baby showers chlo - but I never did before TTC either, they make me cringe for all sorts of reasons! Understandable that you’re upset with your friend - my best friend never asks me anything about anything, even when I volunteer information. It’s very hurtful. And you’re right, it’s amazing how simple things can be but just not picked up! Love Dr Ramsay - he’s like the David Attenborough of sperm 😂

Yaaaaay for good scan kwick! Can’t believe you’ll be off to Spain soon!!

That’s an exciting development plane! What stim have they got you on? I’ll be on 300 of gonal-f for the first half then they’re switching over to menopur for the last few days.

👋🏼 Alice good to see you and thanks for the follow! The Fertility Podcast is fabulous, I’m so glad you’re finding it helpful. The Twitter infertility community is fantastic - so much information and support. Sorry to hear the having sex pressure continues 🙁 My DH was told today he should ejaculate every day to improve his quality - neither of us has the time or inclination for that so he’ll just have to take care of himself!

Thanks for the YouTube link Kerry!

“Optimistic arsehole tendencies” flora 😂😂 We keep it real here!!

Thanks for the luck lemon! Sadly all these tests are not available on NHS which I think is a whole different kind of outrage 😤

Thanks for the luck struggle and you’re so right - people get pregnant all the time and don’t feel guilty, why should I be any different! Hope scan goes well for you tomorrow 😊

@Pyjamas81 great news about antibiotics and best of luck for the interview today!

I had to talk to myself quite seriously yesterday as I think I was viewing trip to Spain as a mini holiday and getting disappointed that actually there will not be much time to fit stuff in. I have booked a flight so I will have a bit of time on Sunday pm there (but not need to get up too early) and then on Monday am before the FET I can go shopping (food and beauty focus), then have FET, then rest. Then I leave again on Tuesday - again without having to get up at the crack of dawn. I really need to curb my spending - not allowed to lift anything heavy.

Wow this thread is moving really quickly now.

mouse try not to worry too much, there will definitely be some sperm hanging around as flash says - you’re definitely still in the running! Fx for you too flash - may you have a relaxed two week wait.

pyjamas well done you for championing the cause - we will all be cheering you on! Also great news on the sperm test - amazing it can be sorted so easily but just isn’t being picked up!

Hi bunny 👋

Glad you’ve had a nice weekend jam - if you can cope with kid overload at centerparcs you can cope with anything! Injections aren’t too bad to be honest - the stims are more complicated a have to break a glass ampoule and mix powders with water but I think I’ve got the hang of it now. Husband has been great at helping out and it’s become our little night time routine which is nice. Fingers crossed your scan goes well!

kerry beetroot juice! It is a bit rank and makes your wee pink but people swear by it for loads of things - you just need to neck it back. I’m also drinking whole milk.

wine no it was the NHS. I’m not quite sure why he said it as they wouldn’t offer the HSG if it wasn’t accurate - but obviously there is a chance it could be a false positive. You do hear of loads of people getting pregnant afterwards so I hope you are one of them!

kwick glad you got the meds sorted! Hope you’ve managed to get your flights booked -
so exciting!!

plane I’m doing 300 of merional - I’ll let you know if it’s having an effect on me.

Does anyone watch Blue Planet? After watching Sunday’s episode when a fish lays about 500 eggs, and the male fish just jizzes in their general direction, and then two weeks later hundreds of baby fish are born I just thought ‘is this just not meant to be if it’s so difficult? as I gave myself my 30th injection. It’s hard not to have those moments!! You will definitely not be bad parents, going through all this will make you stronger and more resilient which is only a positive thing.

alice sorry to hear you’ve had such a tough time. The pressure is huge - perhaps thinking about IVF and taking steps towards that might take the pressure of natural conception so you can get back to enjoying sex! I’ve definitely found that since we’ve realised it’s unlikely to happen naturally.

flora glad the open evening went well. Hope the consultation goes well as well - after you’ve had the appointment you might feel strongly one way or the other about waiting or going ahead?

plane that's really exciting, hopefully you can enjoy the rest of 2017 in style and get yourself prepped for January

pyjamas the infection/antibiotics thing beggars belief. Has is it not a nationwide scandal that couples can pay vast amounts of money for IVF when basic tests are not being done? I can't quite believe this is true. Best of luck for your interview today x

kwick so frigging excited for you - that plane journey home will be carrying precious cargo!

Hello alice and thank you xx sorry to hear you and DH are still struggling with trying. I'll be keeping everything crossed for your IVF if you do try that - but hope a BFP comes along before that time xx

Speaking of BFPs otters I hope you are doing really well

Hope the scan went well struggle We watched that episode of Blue Planet too and were a bit with all the fertilisation going on left right centre. Bloody fish.

Hi flora glad you are still with us, its a tough decision to make to push the treatment button but it sounds like you are gathering the information you need and will get there in your own time

Kerry when you say they haven't got appointments does that mean it'll be a bit of a wait? Thanks for sharing the YouTube series - I watched the whole lot. So much to relate to.

Progynova has got my boobs so sore, I feel bloated I've got mood swings and also this ridiculous libido?! HS with DH last night just for the hell of it and it was GREAT. Got my scan tomorrow morning - god knows what for as I don't think I've been down regulating - so I am going to ask them all the questions. Then they teach me how to inject. DH is away on a trip so I think I might actually audio record it on my phone as he is not going to trust me to take all the information in . gee I've got your top tips copied into my phone!

There was a line in the 'Get a life' IVF book where they talk about him injecting her for the first time and she yells STOP FUCKING MOVING YOU MASSIVE FUCKING TWAT which made us both think perhaps its best I inject myself and DH supervises. Hahaha!

Bit disappointed with the scan results this morning - 5 follicles of an ok size and 5 much smaller ones - ironically my shoddy right ovary is doing better. Also lining still a bit thin - despite all my bloody beetroot juice! They have upped my dose of Merional and back on Saturday for another scan. The nurse did reassure me that I would get to egg collection (I am quite worried about not making it that far) but feeling a bit down I haven’t responded better.

Hey all!

kerry loved those clips! Keeping it real 😂🙈

pjs I’m on 300 gonal f too! Have you started it yet?! Lol at the David Attenborough likeness! So true! My oh has been put on antibiotics for his sperm due to white blood cells, picked up on his second test with our consultant. Why it wasn’t identified at the first I don’t know, seems to be the ever changing sperm requires frequent analysing! 👀

winging how do you know if it’s long or short protocol? I’ve no idea! Think they are putting me on the pill first then something follows that..?!? Man I need to start reading up on this and remembering!!

Jam good work on the shagging! I’ve booked my oh in for a session for purely fun later!

struggle what stage are you at? Hope it’s all going well!

I’m away to read up on icsi, I’ve no clue on what’s going on now all I really remember was when my dec period starts I call the nurse! 😂 I need an ivf diary.... wonder if paperchase do them 🤔😂

Thanks for the good luck vibes guys - I think the interview went really well! I felt confident the whole way through and it was great to actually feel excited about something again for once in my life. They're interviewing a few more people this week then I'll find out if I've made it to the second interview stage which will be with the chief exec (no pressure!). I felt really energised afterwards which is a good sign I think, they also asked me whether my 3 month notice period is negotiable, which perhaps is another good sign?! Who knows. Nothing for me to worry about at the moment though! Have decided not to go for the roles where I am even if they would be a step up and a big pay jump - I read the job descriptions and felt even more uninspired than I did before, so no thanks.

I know jam - it's a total scandal! Even more of a scandal with the NHS to be honest - they're wasting millions on IVF before men are checked properly and cutting back on IVF spending - it makes zero sense. Hahaha I remember that bit of the 'get a life' book - I did all my own injections apart from the progesterone ones at the end because they're fcking impossible as I'm such a control freak!

Sorry to hear you're disappointed with your scan struggle - I still think that's a good amount of follicles and the others can catch up? I'm no expert of course but I think those are good enough numbers to feel secure about making it to egg collection. Feeling like you're not responding to treatment is a shit feeling, I know. Just try not to be too hard on yourself, you're doing great xxx

haven't started yet plane waiting to see when we clear up DH's sperm issue, then we'll get the all clear to start. I'm hoping for February so I've got enough time to fully recover from the last two rounds and mentally prepare! My DH's white blood cell issue wasn't picked up before simply because it wasn't tested for - rage! I didn't find gonal f too bad actually - the injection is easy peasy (once you've done the first one) and I didn't get any side effects from it the first time around on 300. I did the second time on 450, but that cycle was a total disaster all around!

Thanks struggle ! I’ve got Pom juice for now but I love beetroots anyway

jamon my next cycle will be over Christmas and then it’ll be time for ivf anyway so it won’t be a goer. May do more iui In future if first ivf fails though

pjs - we’ll done on the interview! Fingers crossed!

Glad some people enjoyed the series!

Glad my tips are going to helpful @Jamon sorry everyone I can't comment individually but am on my phone and on holiday pissed

Ha ha love that geeup, too damn right! Hope you're having a brilliant holiday.

Can you start with IVF in January kerry?

Interview sounds great pyjamas. Nothing worse than when you feel totally uninspired in a job so must feel good to get out there and look at other options. Glad it went well. Totally know what you mean about Dr Ramsay being like David Attenborough. I wish he was our doctor throughout the whole thing, I would trust him with my life and he just makes you feel confident that he is doing everything he can for you.

I feel like that plane.. I'm just waiting to ring the nurses once AF arrives and then hoping they'll explain the timeline etc to me in a bit more detail. Feel like I don't really know what I'm doing!

Ha ha *kwick your post made me laugh. I know you're going for a serious reason but why not see it as a mini holiday, enjoy yourself if you can when you've got a bit of free time and enjoy a bit of sunshine, you deserve it.

Sorry to hear you're disappointed with the scan struggle. The nurses know what they're doing though and you're still doing good.

jam I definitely won't be letting DH anywhere near me. He's such a faffer and ultra clumsy so I can just imagine the arguments we would have! Good luck for the scan tomorrow and hope you get all the answer you want. I always go in with all these questions in my head but always get a bit bamboozled, even when I write them down! Must be something about those rooms...

Morning sorry I’ve missed a bit. Everything sounds exciting in here this week.

Pyjamas so glad the interview went well, I hope you get it, I’m guilty of putting my work life on hold in the hope of another BFP but I’ve set myself a limit until next June. Then I’ll look for something else.

Kwick I am sooooo freaking excited for you. Like climbing the walls excited.

Plane. I have a fertility diary!! I actually combo it with my food and fitness. It’s called a mambi happy planner. I also have another for everyday planning and another at work. Kinda obsessed. I decorate with stickers like a total nut job but it’s soooooo pretty.

Struggle. Sending warming vibes to get those eggos and lining perfect. Remember it only takes one.

Jam. BOW CHICA WOW WOW. happy high libido shagging. 😇 Maybe hold the puppies like a porn star if they are hurting. 😎

My temps are still rising. I’m 6DPO. Again in new territory as I’ve usually had some drops by now. So that’s good!!

It’s DHs birthday tomorrow so I baked him a cake last night. I’ll decorate tonight. Lemon cake with lemon buttercream and lemon curd with a lemon icing drizzle. 🍋🍋🍋🍋🍋🍋

jamon best of luck with the scan. Feel free to call me if you get stuck with the injections!
What CD are you? They may be checking the lining?
Sorry to hear about Progynova side effects - how much are you taking?

struggle 5 is great!!!! Better quality than quantity. Are you drinking lots of blue milk?

pjs you are our crusader!!! PLEASE continue this fight!!! You articulate and brilliant and I feel sure you can win it!!
Glad the interview went well!

plane an IVF diary!!! An AMAZEBALLS idea!!!

😂😂😂 geeup have a fab time!!!

Fank you mouse!!!
Please send me some cake by post!!!! Sounds delish!!

Thanks girls - you have made me feel loads better, I think it was the fact that the nurse seemed a bit disappointed in me.

kwick yes I am having a small glass a night but maybe I should be having more. I am currently trying to neck loads of water, and then come home from work and throw back some Pom juice, beetroot juice (separately
obviously) and some milk before bed.

mouse ooh a birthday conception...have fun this weekend 😉

chlo jam My husband is loads less clumsy than me with the injections - he is also a lot better at preparing them, I rush and then get stressed. Would definitely recommend at least sitting together while you do them!

jam good luck for the scan today!

And well done pjs - sounds really positive. A new focus could be exactly what you need, I feel super excited for you!

My new delightful drug is a antibiotic cream up the fanjo every night - the nurse said with that and the progesterone pessaries after transfer I won’t feel clean for ages 😩😩

Struggle you are doing brilliantly. Keep the faith xx I’m cheering your follies

Plane if you find an ivf diary let me know ! Starting to feel like I need one!

Well done pyjamas sounds like you did really well and it totally sounds like the right decision to not go for the internal positions. Sounds brutal!

Kerry didn’t realise you were doing IVF so soon. I’d imagine it may come as a welcome change from IUIs

Cheers gee !

lol chlo I think having seen the demo that I’ll be doing them, but I might let DH do one if he really wants to. He will defo be helping with prep as he is very precise and perfectionist. I am slapdash

Hahahahaha mouse! I actually kept a rather unnattractive bra on. Poor DH! Haha. That cake sounds fabulous 😍

Thanks kwick xx cd 30 today. Fuck you AF!! I’m still on progynova so no bleed yet. Taking my last dose tonight so should bleed over the next few days. I’m in control now . When do you fly??

Struggle why antibiotic?