IVF September/October 2017

[Filipinam]

Hi Ladies! Finally I will have my first IVF treatment as soon as my next cycle starts which I expect it to be more or less end of September/beginning of October. My periods are very irregular so I never know exactly. My consultant suggested antagonist protocol which I will receive in post soon. I am extremely excited but then realistic about the fact that it might not be successful first time.

How are you feeling ladies? When are you due to start your Ivf Journey? Fingers crossed for all of us fighters;-)

Thanks for the welcome Minster! I read your intro post... wow what a journey. We're also keeping everything under wraps as I had a severe ruptured ectopic earlier this year and I found the hardest part was dealing with everyone else's reactions. I hope it all works out for you :)

On AMH, I get really confused as there seem to be different scales?? I was told mine was 28, and that put me at high risk of OHSS, but no idea what it means for egg quality!

Egg collection this morning - 7 eggs although 2 were small apparently. They had difficulty flushing them out whatever that means. I never seem to be with it enough when talking to the doctors to ask the right questions.

Nervous wait until tomorrow's call to find out if we had any fertilise.

Suffering more pain than last time - sore to walk around,sit up, go to toilet etc.

It sure is nice having this forum to chat to - my family is a long way overseas and I talk to them about it but we've not told my husbands family who are local - couldn't face the millions of questions and hovering that would be inevitable. But makes me feel a bit guilty at times.

How are people's partners doing with all of this? My husband doesn't seem to understand the discomfort I'm in but I know he's trying.

Hoping everyone is having a good day. Sending positive thoughts everywhere xx

Sunshine everything crossed for you! I was totally out of it don't worry, and I had bad pain the couple of days afterwards but not on the day, it was really weird. Sending lots of positive thoughts for fertilisation your way.

I know exactly what you mean about your DH's family & feeling guilty, we have done the same, my parents know we have done the IVF EC process but not DH's, but neither know about the surrogacy or FER going ahead. But we can't feel guilty though cos it has to be what is best for us lot who are doing this really really tough process so don't be hard on yourself

Plus my DH is a bit "it can't be that bad" you've had worse!! So I don't get much sympathy, I hope others are better!!

Hi all,

Sorry I've missed loads of chat. Not been in a great place. My emotions are all over the place. To make it worse my wee cat is poorly and things are not looking good for him. I'm utterly devastated and overwhelmed with my emotions.
I've spent the last 2 days crying. Dealing with the cat is hard enough but with my heightened emotions I'm a mess. Cannot keep it together.
I'm so bloody nervous about my scan on Friday as well. I keep thinking they are going to tell me I'm not responding to the injections.

JoJo, Lucie and Binks - welcome!

Minster- it's such a bloody mine field. Trying to decide what's for the best would drive you round the bend.

JoJo - thank you for the words of encouragement

Lucie - talking to these ladies who are all going through the same thing has been a godsend for me. As supportive as family, friends and DH is they have no clue what this rollercoaster is like. So we are here to listen and support.
My AMH is only 6.9 which puts me at the very low end of normal for my age. What I had my scan before starting stims they think they could see 6 follicles so I'm just hoping they all mature and produce some good quality eggs.
I was really nervous before starting but felt good to get going. I'm now cacking myself about what may come to light about egg quality etc.

Binks - the thought of the stims was worst than the actual doing for me. You'll be great. Just focus on the picture, put your big girls pants on and you'll smash it. Are you doing them yourself??
What dosage are you on?
I don't think there is a direct correlation to AMH and egg quality. All AMH tells them about is ovarian reserve.

Sunshine - yay! That's great. Fingers, toes and legs crosssd they all fertilise. Keep us posted. Auch I think it's understandable you were out of it. Was it sedation or general anaesthetic??
My Husband is the same. He's trying to be supportive and understanding but has absolutely no clue about the scale of how this is affecting me physically and mentally. The are so removed from it all really.

Minster- my other half keeps telling me to get it together that me being an emotional wreck all the time will not help us achieve what we want! I would like him to try deal with the crazy ups and downs.

Positive thoughts to you all xx

Scotslass - so sorry to hear you're having such a hard time. The extra hormones can play havoc with you. Hopefully you'll feel better after fridays scan - i felt the same, wondering if it was working.

We have 2 fertilised eggs this morning (only 4 of the 7 collected were mature). They will wait until day 5 for transfer so another long wait hoping that this time we have one to implant.

Scotslasssending lots of hugs, flowers & cake I hope the cat gets better, it's horrible when something like that happens & the hormones really won't help. I remember crying loads & loads at so much stuff. Don't be hard on yourself.

Sunshine that's great about the 2 embies, same as us, obviously we all wish it was more but I everything crossed they do well to day 5 & they can get the go ahead. Are you going to put both back? That was another hard decision, one we agonised over for days, one or both? To thaw both or just one? There never will be a right or wrong answer so again it's whatever is best for each couple.

To all stimming ladies keep going! Hugs to all

Sunshine - hope you're feeling better today after your egg collection!! Great news that 2 fertilised!!

Scotslass - I'm so sorry about your poorly kitty!! I have two cats and I would be distraught if either of them were ill. Plus all the extra emotions it must be so hard for you, totally understandable that you feel the way you do.

Thanks for the pep talk too!! I'm feeling better about it today. Weirdly the stabbing myself does not bother me - I'm mostly worried about side effects! I suffer quite badly with depression and anxiety, and whilst I'm stable now I'm always worried about changing the status quo. Also my hormones are bonkers at the best of times so no idea how I'll respond. I'm short protocol though, with lower dose of merional (225) and fully prepared to freeze-all (fingers crossed I get any!) if I feel ropey.

Minster forgive me as I've missed it but how is your journey going?

Hello all! Not had a minute to pop in here for a while, hope everyone's doing ok :)

My AMH was only 6.9 so I'm worried there won't be enough eggs to collect, they've said they'll give me the highest dose but there may be a chance they abandon the process if that happens :(

Waiting for day 1 of my next period in a couple of weeks to book in for the training appointment for injections & get the medication

What have people done about work? I haven't told anyone officially but I'm worrying that with the increased appointments/scans it'll be too much & wondering whether people have been upfront, booked time off, or been signed off by the GP when the treatment is in full progress

I wasn't sure what to do about work initially. I work as an account manager in a small team so I was concerned about managing workloads and stressing out and leaving colleagues to deal with half finished stuff. So I spoke to a female director in the company for some advice. In the end I told my immediate boss - weird as he was pretty new but I felt comfortable telling him. I didn't want anyone else at work to know though. My direct reports I just told I was on some medications and suffering side effects so they should expect me to be in and out a bit.

I'm lucky they've been very flexible with me and happy for me to work from home if needed and book out time for scans etc. Given I suffered a bit more from side effects than I was expecting I was really glad I did. And both cycles I ended up taking the day before egg collection and next 2 days off. By that point I was so uncomfortable I couldn't be sat at a desk for 8 hours. Because the first cycle didn't go well I also took 2 extra days to get my head together before I went back into the office.

It obviously depends on what job you do, how comfortable you are telling work, and how the side effects hit you, if at all. Hope hearing this helps you as you think about what to do. Just go with whatever feels right for you as I'm sure everyone is different.

X

Thanks Sunshine :) I think my immediate manager would be very understanding, I just don't want more people than necessary knowing but I'm sure she'd keep it confidential.

Maybe I'll wait & see how I get on re side effects etc first, I work in events/PR so conscious that there are days I'll be expected to be able running around on my feet all day & I won't want to be doing that

Sooper I'm not working ATM so I didn't have that issue but also I didn't really have any physical side effects that I noticed other than being an emotional crying wreck so I would tell your manager as you will need the appointment time then just see.

Dinks, glad the stabbing is going well, keep the status quo and focus on the outcome & im sure you'll keep the depression in check, if you feel like you need to vent or wobble check in with us because it's a tough thing let alone with anxiety.

I'm on a waiting game as I had eggs collected back in Easter following years of cancer treatment & being told we wouldn't be able to have kids & wasn't offered egg harvesting before any of my treatments over the last 6 years as it's non standard Chemo. But finally was able to get the go ahead but on a treatment now I can't stop to carry a child so 1 of my best friends is going to have an embryo transfer end of oct to hopefully be a surrogate- so she's currently downregulating & i get to feel pretty useless 😔 Especially as we haven't told anyone we doing it in case it doesn't work. We won't tell ppl until 12 weeks if it works & a lot of ppl don't even realise I can't carry a child as we don't really discuss my treatment because I "look well" not like a cancer patient in the slightest.

It's very good to talk on here, no one IRL!

Filipinam how ar you doing, you started this thread, have you started yet?

Hi all,
Sooper - my AMH is also 6.9 so I know exactly how you are feeling. I have my first scan tomorrow after a week of injections and I am absolutely cacking my pants that's the follicles are not maturing. It's such a nerve wracking time. I'm just hoping and praying all is working.
Re: work. My immediate boss knows, I have a very good friend in HR who knows ( which is handy) I also work with my best friend so she obviously knows. My work have been amazing. I finish on the day of EC for a few days then back then off for the week after ET. My work is really flexible so I'm able to work at home etc which has helped.

Minster - I just find your journey incredible and I really am hoping it all works out. You have been through so much you deserve this. I will be saying lots of prayers for you.

I hope everyone else is well.

I'm really beginning to feel quite a lot of pressure so I'm hoping that's a good sign.
Cannot wait to get this scan done tomorrow morning.

Have a good day ladies x

Minster your story is incredible, as Scots said! I really really hope it works out, crossing everything for you! What a wonderful friend you have, too. It restores my faith in the world!

Scots how did your scan go today? Hope it went ok? Thinking of you!

Souper I'm also debating what to do about work. I am going to wait and see, too.

I have my first scan on Tuesday morning. No side effects yet (touch wood!), but it's only day 3. Feeling knackered but that could just be because it's been a long week! Glad it's Friday!

Hope you all have a lovely weekend xx

Happy Friday everyone.

Day 3 call from the clinic today - we've got 1 top quality and one medium quality - waiting till sunday for transfer (day 5). Haven't even spoke to the doctors about 1 or 2 embryo transfer - they never brought it up and now Im not sure.

Hoping scans and injections went well today for all

Xx

Yay Sunshine, that's great news!! Did they say whether the medium would be freezable?

Hey all,
It's finally Friday! Yay.
So scan went well. I have 10 follicles maturing. 6 over 10mm and 4 just under. Which I'm delighted with. As my AMH is on 6.9 I was dreading how it was going and how many we would see developing. It really was a relief to know I am responding well to the drugs. I'm back on Monday for another scan to see how things are going. I'm really starting to feel like there is a lot of pressure down there now.
I think it will be EC next Friday.
I've started the nasal spray and me no like. It's rotten. Needs must though ah.

Binks - I was dreading the first scan as was convinced things wouldn't be doing what they should. I was so relieved today when I heard all is on track. All the best for Tuesday.

Sunshine - that's great news sounding very promising.

Have a good one girlies xx

Scotlass - great news! 10 is good news. Definitely feels better once you know things are happening.

Binks - they didn't say anything about freezing the medium one. They're calling again tomorrow to confirm appointment so maybe be I'll ask them then. I never know the questions to ask so thanks for that one

Scots that's brilliant, great numbers, all working perfectly!

Binks, hopefully all the positivity here will give you the reassurance you need for your scan, we've got some great numbers going on on this thread!!

Sunshine you must be very pleased, one to & one medium is really great, when I was down & looking for hope I found loads of stories of woman getting pregnant from all kinds of qualities so you've got great chances there!! I would ask what their thoughts are on one or 2 transfer when they call because like I said it was a tough decision for us (risk of twins or there's a study now saying if you implant one top & one lesser quality then the lesser might impede the top quality for instance) but implanting 2 does still increase the chances our clinic told us by 10% of a pregnancy but we decided as ours are 2 frozen ones to thaw one & see if it can be transferred rather than thaw both & have to transfer both. I think it's better to know what you are doing.

Thanks for the support guys, my friend is wonderful, she first suggested it over 2 years ago before we even knew for sure I couldn't carry so we've all (her & hubby) been researching since then so not a light decision. it's brought us all closer, she will be a very special auntie if it works x

Morning ladies, sorry for the quietness I've been all over the place (must be the hormones) it's been great to see everyone's updates! How you all doing? I feel like shit. A week more waiting to go and it sucks. My AMH was 14.2 and was given 33% success rate at the time it was done. I had a call on Tuesday two embies made it to blastocyst and have been frozen. I'm thinking of taking up the offer of a counsellor at the clinic, I'm very emotional at the moment. I kind of feel the wait to test is worse than the anxiety of the scans and injections. Sorry I'm ranting. Clinic signed me off for a week (standard procedure) and the classes it as gynaecological condo on which was great for work. I now have another two weeks from my GP as not appropriate for me to go back to work and possible restrain patients! the bad side is at home with too much time to think! Xxx positive vibes and big hugs to you all xxxx ❤️

Oh hanim, so sorry to hear you're having a hard time of it this week. Totally normal I'm sure. But pleased that you've got 2 frozen too.

I've got a phone counsellor through my work health scheme and it helps just to talk to someone - particularly on days when you are home alone. It's worth doing.

Keep positive, and just fill your days with anything that makes you happy. I'm off to get my nails done on Monday as a treat to break up my workday.

X

@hanim79 I totally feel your pain about the waiting being worse & being at home with thinking time is worse I think too- I have to fill my days with productive stuff to keep myself busy so I don't go insane & like sunshine says I have planned little treats like nails & hair done to give little perks to pick me up too, it does help!! Keep going ladies xx

Thank you minster and sunshine x means a lot x well my ET was done a week ago, still talking away to it but it's the thought of "has it planted" because it either has or hasn't by now and that's the thought that I keep thinking. Also getting headaches which I'm sure is caffeine withdrawel! I have one coffee a day. I'm going to get my hair done and desperately need it colouring but don't know if I can? May call the clinic tomorrow to check. (They say from EC you have to treat yourself as pregnant) what is women have to go through eh 🤢 X x

I'm literally sat in a coffee shop around the corner from clinic - ET in an hour.

Did you feel ok after the ET? My husband wants to meet friends for lunch after (they're over from oz so it's our only chance). But I'm not sure...

My grey hairs are taking over and am in desperate need of a colour too. I read a bunch of papers on the tpopic to see if it was safe - so far as I can tell they say that while the dyes have substances in them that are harmful, the levels are just too low to actually be harmful. But despite that I'm not confident. Anyone else know? Let us know if you do ask the clinic.

Hanim you have so much will power, my friend & I are planning to do a first response test after a week or 8 days, depending on which day ET falls on, we already know we will cave so think it's better to have a day as we will have to travel to her to do it all together so are going to focus on that! You are very strong, keep going!

My friend asked me if it's ok to dye her hair & she researched it & said it was ok so I said yes, but very interested to hear what a clinic does say!

Absoluteky everything crossed for you Hanim & very good luck for sticky embies Sunshine 😘😁

So sorry sunshine just see your post! Dam alert didn't go off. How you feeling after your ET? I would of said I felt fine after ET I went to my friends for lunch afterwards! And sending you lots of sticky ness....
and of course minster I will let you know, kind of feel silly asking the clinic about hair dye but they are so lovely I'd rather check. And will report straight back afterwards.... x x