Secondary infertility support group here!

[Annabellaboo]

Ladies-I hope we all find each other here from the original thread! I didn't realise we had ran out of room on the other thread! Shout if you are there!

Thanks Aurora - agree the higher the hope the harder it is. Last month I had got my hopes up as it was the first month of ovulation induction, this month I'm much more cynical.

cola ttc kills passion, and sleep deprivation kills passion so I don't blame you for not wanting to dtd.

It really messes with you, I hate the 2ww but I've also started to hate the ovulation dtd period. It's so mechanical and now we're paying for the fertility drug there's now even more pressure to perform. I know ivf is no walk in the park but at least success is not down to your efforts in the bedroom.

tara I agree pregnancy tests I think make things so much worse. Last month I did one early but just used the Cheapo sticks not a brand and got a faint line one day... Hopes up obvs. Then I read some other forum that mentioned about evaporation lines or something where some tests will knave a very faint line where the liquid has evaporated, do misleading. Def going to wait until my period this time. I'm just going to give all my tests to my mum so they're not in the house.

Thanks harry I know must have been a faulty test I assume so no more testing early for me.that sounds like a plan tho I think they do more tests for natural killer cells etc but it's all done over 4 days I think there's a lady on here Anna I think she got her bfp the month or too after Athens i think she still pops on so she might read and inform you more.
Clueless I know all about Evaps iv had a few but knew they were evaps as they showed after test time but it does get your hopes right up there that's why if I see a line now I test again there and then to see if it's on both tests.i totally agree the fertile week just seems like an inconvenience now there's no fun in it at all I k ow everyone says don't do it then just relax and enjoy it but it's impossible when u know it must happen that week xx

Thanks ladies. Indeed we missed ov day but fck it we got two before it so better than nothing. Its comforting to know others can find the fertile window a massive struggle too - it's just the pressure and sometimes I convince myself we aren't having fertility issues, we are having not optimally timed sex issues - which doesn't help! X

Hi ladies. Just a quick hello. I am still really sick but have managed to stay out of hospital so that is something. I'm 9 weeks now and hooping for some relief at 12.
Been having a quick read at some of the latest posts.
Tara- I didn't have to repeat tests already done when I went to Serum, only ones they like to do specifically that I hadn't had elsewhere. I contacted my NHS doctors before I went and got print outs of all my tests & results so they had a full history.
Peny does the extra tests she knows need to be done and doesn't try and upsell.

Hi Anna sorry your still sick hopefully the 2nd trimester is a lot easier and you can get to enjoy it more.thanks for that it was for harry as she was thinking of the cost of ivf if it goes down that root so remembered some of yous going there.
Cola that's great you got two in before it if it's ment to be it will be and I believe after a year of trying it does get more difficult some of the things you read are like we had sex everyday for the whole cycle and they class it as long time ttc when in reality it's been 6 months!!!just try and dtd around that time and you know youv got some hope,
Well I had two days of brown cm and now back to extreme clotted blood last two cycles have been much easier im starting to think that line was maybe another chemical as i didn't start full flow until I was 3 days late but who knows just feel like crap my arthritis is in full swing as well can hardly move so hoping I can pick myself up and get back on track.hope everyone else is doing good xx

So I've just started spotting, so I'm out for another cycle . I was expecting it this time so not as upset as last time.

I don't know what to do next.... Thoughts?

• I could do one more cycle of the drugs so given it three goes (dc1 conceived 3rd go naturally, so could just be 3rd time lucky)

• sit this cycle out and get a load more tests done to try and work out what is causing our infertility

• just get on with ivf (not ideal timing as we're doing a big move in the next few weeks)

Can't really decide, if it wasn't for the move I'd probably just do ivf,as I just think this has already not worked twice how likely is it to work next time. But then again it takes a few cycles naturally sometimes, so maybe this is worth one more go.

Hope everyone is doing OK x

Sorry you're still suffering Annabellaboo. Hopefully relief will be round the corner!

clueless sorry to hear, are you moving to a new area? I'd see how soon you could get going with it (assuming it's an option for you) as even if it's not this month then it might give you something to focus on? It's all a huge gamble though isn't it?! I'd also get tests first if you're not sure whether there's an issue (sorry if you have already posted about this)

Thanks blackcherries yes I think I will ask my doctor about it. To be realistic I think ivf will have to wait until we move looking at the timings (we are relocating but it will still be ok to use the same clinic) but I don't want to do another round of fertility drugs for the sake of it as it gives me bad headaches.

Re tests I've had all the hormone tests + amh but I haven't had stuff like laproscopy / hysteroscopy, was advised not to do that at the same time as the drugs.

Annoyingly still spotting after a few days, would rather my period just started now, I hate this point in the cycle where you know it's game over but it's not 100% confirmed! X

Hi ladies. Surely we are due some good news on here soon!?

Tara, sorry you are struggling with arthritis on top of everything else. Is this related to the infertility ie autoimmune issues?

Clueless, that's a tough call isn't it? Are you only allowed one more round of the drugs? If so I'd probably wait to get more tests. Saying that, I'd feel superstitious about the third time lucky too. I was convinced we would conceive if we dtd in the same place DC1 was conceived in the spare bedroom. Tricky as it's now DC1S bedroom. That was a weird baby dance with iggle piggle staring at me let me tell you, and if obviously didn't work. Just shows how bloody desperate you get to try anything lol

Hopefully the move will take your mind off things for a little while.

This month has been much better for me. I've not been googling or symptom spotting at all and it's really helped as I've come to realise the only real symptom is a BFP on that test. I'm 10dpo and not testing early and being strong this month so I am much happier than I have been in a while. I think it's because my referal has come through and I'm hoping they find out what's wrong.

Saying that I still find myself working out due dates and day dreaming about baby names. It's impossible not to....

Clueless sorry your struggling to decide like black cherry I'd prob be the same on the 3rd time lucky plus loads of natural and pills take 3 months to work but if it's costly and the next step is ivf for you then it is a hard choice maybe do your move first and then decide give urself a break so it's not so hectic in your life most people say ivf is so tough with injections and meds and emotional that it would prob be best to hold off till youv done the move but saying that waiting feels forever!
Thanks aura I'm convinced it is but my re and doc just say it can take a little bit longer for ra woman but 4 years is a lot longer I can't go on methotrexate as I'm ttc and this is given to abort pregnancy but it's suppose to be the wonder drug for it I do believe it's connected as my period is over it's calmed back down and I get flare ups during ovulation so Defo hormones involved I get steroid injections wich I believe caused the high prolactin but it says on the information leaflet it can actually help but I feel this is what caused my periods to change I'm on hydroxychlorquine which is givin for repeated miscarriage aswell as arthritis but takes 3 months to kick in so this is 3rd month but as you say as it's ra I have my body attacks healthy cells so I do worry it attacks healthy embryos but il never know.
Glad youv had a good month I love a month when you don't google and stress to test daily and I really wish we would have some luck on here to keep up hope xx

Thanks tara and aurora for your advice. I agree I think that ivf is too much with the move as well, it's already so stressful. Think will just do another month of the drugs and hope for 3rd time lucky.

Aurora, we must be at very similar points in our cycle - 13 dpo? I've still not started period but been spotting for 4 days so I suppose it's coming. I'm trying to push that tiny little bit of hope out my mind.... How are you doing? X

Hi clueless yes we are cycle buddies I am also 13dpo and due today according to FF, my 2 other apps say I'm late . I don't have any spotting but that only happened once (last month actually). I thinks she will show her ugly face this evening, but even so, that will have given me another 12LP which is good for me as it was 10/11 for a long time. Plus I've been chilled this month so it's a win. Positivity!

Fingers crossed af stays away for you

Hello.
34 ttc#2 18 months have one ds age 4.
Currently at the start of my journey having had bloods at gp which where all clear. I have now been referred to fertility clinic. I had an amh test done this month so waiting for results of that.
I had a mega short cycle this month which I reckon will have messed up 21 day bloods.
I get such a lot of pain around my periods I'm terrified something is really wrong :( I have a scan later this week so be interesting to get results.

Hi chocolate,

Good news that your tests are in progress already. Day 21 bloods always end up being wrong lol how short was your cycle this time?

I also have painful periods, in fact I experience cramps throughout the whole cycle. It's always been like this for me however weirdly my last 2 cycles have been much better with this current one no luteal cramps other than the odd twinge. Not sure how to feel about that. I have had 2 sessions of arvigo massage so I'm guessing that's helped, plus bding is less painful. Could also be the handfuls of supplements I swallow every day

@Tee4me are you still out there? Think we are cycle buddies too. Thinking about you x

Hi auroras
Do they know why you get so much pain?
Well I knew I ovulated rediculously early (day 8) so I did my bloods day 19, period came evening of day 20.
Only thing I changed this month is the Dr put me on a low dose of amitriptyline and I bought a new folic acid with vitamin D. Stopped the vit D but can't do much about the amitriptyline. Hopefully next month will be back to normal.

chocolate have you considered acupuncture to regulate your cycles? I had short cycles and a too short luteal phase, and acupuncture gave me a much more ordinary cycle of 26-28 days with a luteal phase if at least 10 days. Didn't get me preggers but at least it's one less thing to worry about that's wrong.

I know from taking it that amitriptyline is safe during pregnancy do I don't think it would affect your cycles.

Aurora great to have a cycle buddy! Hope you are holding up. I get a lot of cramps and twinges throughout my luteal phase, bothers me as well, as I never had that before my 1st pregnancy so feels like something changed and that is part of it.

Hi aura ooooo has af showed yet?fingers crossed for you and if not it's great ur have a longer cycle.
Sorry harry not had it done hopefully some of the lady's can fill you in on what to expect.
Had results for scan back everything normal.so another cycle just heading into fertile week 😩 Lol hope everyone is doing well xx

Af showed this morning bleurgh!!!

So I got a 13day LP a 28 day cycle and no spotting just boom full flow, so I'm clinging onto the positivity just about!

It's impossible not to feel defeated though. I wish I had the strength to just give up because this is obviously not meant to be for us. I am still determined to find out why though!

Good luck for tomorrow Harry! Tell us all about it.

Hope you make the most of the fertile window Tara. Hubby has his SA on my ovulation day so this cycle is a write off pretty much. Oh well it's a break from TTC for the first time in 2 years!

sorry aura I was really hoping for the first bfp on the thread but at least you can take the positive that something is changing for the good with the longer lp,I don't think il ever give up until Im in menopause,I had a appointment with my re doc yesterday he said the medication isn't working for my ra and it's the first time theyv said my body's under so much stress that aswell as attacking my cells it could be kicking out any embryo wich to me makes sence as when your pregnant your body suppresses the immune system and mines is all screwed up so offerd me biological drugs made it sound amazing just inject my self and itl take the pain away and give me no immune system at all so the only worry would be catching viruses it's a tnf blocker this all sounded pretty worth the risk until I got home and read the info leaflet about how there's no evidence but there's been a link with fatal cancers when on this skin cancer lung cancer and rare incurable blood cancer so I'm not going to take it I lost my dad to cancer he was 44 and his dad was 35 when he passed with cancer so I worry about this as it is,it made me really think tho that maybe it just might not happen but I'm just going to keep trying and hoping that it will happen for me xx

Harry I had a HSG and was scaring myself silly reading about it beforehand but it was fine. Some people do report a lot of pain but for me the dye went in slowly and I'd had some painkillers beforehand and barely felt anything!

Hi ladies. For those who are a little newer on here and have missed a lot of from the old thread I just wanted to let you all know there has been a few success stories over the last year. We had at least 2 from the old thread and most recently me after trying for over 3 years. If any of you are unfamiliar with my story and want to ask how I got to my bfp then I am still here if I can help anyone at all. This thread was often my lifeline when I was in the darkest of times, it really has helped me get through this long painful journey.
Just want you to all know there is always hope and it really can happen. Good luck to you all and I hope there is more good news soon.