Infertility just spoils everything. A brief rant.

I know exactly what you mean, I am the same with my friend. I love her to bits it's just very hard to deal with it. I just don't know what to say and don't want to see her either. It's such bullshit feeling like this 😔

Infertility sucks !!! :(

If you have to pay for it as I did (took 5 times to fall preg) then look and research abroad. Much cheaper then U.K.

Yeah I will have to look into it. Another family member pregnant

Oh no sorry johnolaura that really sucks x

Thankyou it really does x

Can I join too please?

It'll be 10 years in June and still nothing.

2 ivf cycles and one miscarriage later and where are we? Still the only childless couple that we know. Infertility breaks your soul into tiny pieces and shits all over them.

Thinking about using the two embryos that we have frozen but I'm terrified to start it, going through it all again and for what? Would I prefer never to get pregnant again or risk another miscarriage? Couldn't say because either isneqially painful.

I'm sick and tired of periods - the body's cruel reminder of yet another failure and this month myboobs hurt like hell post-ovulation yet I know that there's no baby there because there's been no sex because I just don't want it since the last ivf round messed with my hormones. I'm so broody it's unbelievable and I'm around newborns all day long and the smell so goooood. I just want one to keep!! Shouldn't be too much to bloody well ask should it?

And now it's post Christmas and I'm so fat that I had a proper double gunt overhang in my work trousers today which has made me feel shit because when trying for a miracle you shouldn't be remotely fat or unhealthy. I'm not ready yet I'm so ready that my head spins and my heart hurts and I don't even know where to begin after an 18 month treatment break for sanity's sake.

I don't even think that makes sense. Sorry.

It makes complete sense! I know how you feel, it's an horrendous feeling and feels like your dying when you have to pretend to be all happy with all the newborns and giving them cuddles. It breaks my heart I don't even know what to do. It's not getting any easier is it?

Welcome mungobungo

What you wrote makes perfect sense, it brought tears to my eyes because what you wrote is so true and heartbreaking. Its just not fair, why should anyone have to go through this xx

I agree it's very hard for us all, if only there was away the pain and heartbreak would go away x

Mungo. I kinda know how you feel as ttc 10yrs and took 5 ivf tho never got preg and mc - think that would have distroyed me 💐💐

The 5th worked was our 2nd fet

I think you have to try the frozen ones as you will always wonder what if ......

A fet is much kinder to your body drug wise and quicker usually 20days in total

Jesus why is this all such a shit show? Totally understand what you're trying to say. Have had baby bombs left right and centre last de weeks. Good friends of ours tonight told us they're expecting their second. We both did such a good job of smiling and saying how fantastic it was- I could just feel the two of us crying inside. We just looked at each other and didn't have to say anything.
Why does it have to be this way? We are good people and would make good parents. I don't know. It starts making me think I don't deserve a baby or something.

It's shit but if you get to hold your baby honestly it's worth it.
4 years later I remember the pain getting there and appreciate my miracle everyday

(Shitty AMH, multiple miscarriages, 4 rounds of IVF, immune issues blah blah blah )

Xxxx. Lots and lots of luck everyone

Happy New Year everyone, i hope everyone gets their wish in 2017 xxx

Happy new year guys! Hope it's a better year for us all! Drink lots of wine and be merry x

I have a quick question, does anyone take CoQ10?
I currently take and have done for bloody years now the pregnacare conception vitamins but i feel for my second cycle like i should be doing something more or changing tactics.
I've read about other stuff but not really sure, people seem to take omega 3, vitamin d, ubiquinol, and folic acid in addition to a multivitamin and some even more vitamins, does anyone else take any of these? X

Happy New Year ladies.

I took CoQ10 in my most recent cycle Hope, as well as a pregnancy vitamin, vit C, Omega 3 and vit d drops. CoQ10 apparently invigorates both sperm and eggs.

Thank you blue please can i ask what coq10 you used, there are so many out there and they vary in price i'm not sure what is best! X

It might be just what you need. Breakaway from the mind fuck for a couple of weeks . You obs won't be able to forget' but just being able to get away from it all, soak in the sun have fun . One of the most important factors in getting through this is trying to take care of your mental and emotional health. I had spent 12yrs trying to accept I probably couldn't have children. I had non weight related pcos . It took 4yrs of poorly done vaginal ultrasound ,poorly taken blood . Senior nurse accusing me of not having enough sex !!! Bloods wait and see. Ovarian diathermy wait and see. Progesterone and clomid . Metformin, progesterone, and clomid . I had lost so much weight because of the metformin that I was 6st4lb and taking build up soups to try and keep me going. I started to worry that the weight loss would prevent getting pregnant. Huge arguments and guilt with my partner. The constant questions, getting your hopes up every month. People asking if I was anorexic offering me all sorts of food when all I wanted to do was vomit. The metformin was a last ditch try before ivf and luckily it worked. The whole situation could have been anticipated and possibly prevented had the geriatric arsehole of a gynecologist investigated properly when I was 16. He asked (in front of my mum) if I sexually active or planning a family at that time. If not there was no point in doing anything. That my concerns didn't matter. Oh and if I did decide to try for a family I would need medical intervention. I have epilepsy which they now say has been impacted on by the pcos. The icing on the cake ? He told 5 medical students that the vaginal pain I experienced, was psychosomatic (especially in girls with aspirations to the nursing profession as I did at the time) as I lay on the exam couch legs akimbo with them all staring at my bits. I think he thought I wouldn't understand the big words. Had he investigated properly some of the physical and psychological damage caused by the pcos could have been prevented. It may also have affected my breast cancer which was found 3 days before I was about to start the clomid for baby number 2. After the chemo, radiotherapy and tamoxifen my periods became regular and at 39 I had baby no 2. It's a strange mental torture that you need to try to give yourself some respite from if you can.

Hope Biocare 200 High Potency from Amazon. It's pricy but Biocare was recommended to me by a nutritionist as it is better absorbed than others.

Zombiemum

After 12yrs of thinking I couldn't have kids I looked in to adoption. My mum was supportive and I felt a sense of relief. To my horror my mother in law said she couldn't love an adopted child as it wasn't blood and you never know what your getting. The pain of not being able to conceive maxamised by the rejection of what I had seen as my answer .This coming from the woman who's daughter had caused untold damage and pain to those around her. She was under section in a locked ward for the 2nd time in 6mths at the time and who's children were traumatised beyond belief. I told her you don't know what your getting no matter blood or not. My sister in law would let no one but us look after her kids when she was sectioned. She then accused me of turning her kids against her because I wanted them for myself . I told her we had stopped treatment in order to look after her kids and it was more likely the drink, drugs and verbal abuse that was doing that . It broke my heart to give them back to her knowing she was off her meds again and their life was going to be difficult . Knowing that my mother in law was colluding in the lies to social work. They were 150 miles away and I could do nothing to stop it .

Thank you blue, i have ordered some from amazon, enough for me and DH, i also popped to the shops today and got some other vitamins so from today will do pregnacare, vit D, folic acid, vit C, zinc, vit E, omega 3 and coq10! This second round best bloody work!!!

zombiemum so sorry to hear about all you have been through, big hugs

I think you are all very brave and strong to go through something like this, it breaks you completely and I believe we can all get through it with time and support if our loved ones x

People see very insensitive to this situation and have no idea what tour going through unless they have been through it or going through it themselves. Don't give up hope, hopefully your treatent will work and you will get your baby. I know what you mean about being unsociable. I am the same at the moment I can't bring myself to be around friends. You feel better shut away so then you don't have to talk about it x