desperately seeking male infertility success stories

[geeup]

Can anyone please post any success stories about conceiving despite issues with their DPs sperm? Mine has poor morphology (less than 2% normal) and we're trying Fertilaid. I'd love to hear that other people got their BFPs despite these issues to help keep my optimism alive! Otherwise I'm happy to support others on the same journey. Thank you in advance.

Good luck with your appointment next week Star, hope all goes well for you. :-)

Thanks friends, I'm pretty scared but trying to psyche myself up and prepare for the inevitability of ivf. If you think about it, it's a positive really - in the past we would have had no option but to keep trying and trying and trying.

I'm so sorry you're feeling so low 27 months is a very long time, you must feel so fed up and it's so lonely keeping this quiet. Is there anyone in real life you can talk to a little bit? I told a few close friends which helped but then all three of them got pregnant in the last 6 months and now I don't want to see them. I talk to another friend who has secondary infertility (unexplained) and it is a real comfort to talk to someone who understands. If there's someone you can think of, I would recommend it.

It's very odd what they're saying about the SA. Maybe the motility is excellent so it should override the low morphology? I would push for answers at your next appointment. A few people on this thread have mentioned blood tests for various hormones and DNA fragmentation etc. Maybe ask for those tests. See if there's a urologist at your clinic and ask for their opinion. My OH had two SAs - one good one bad and they immediately said it will be difficult for us without ivf/icsi. It's devastating but I don't think I can go on much longer trying with nothing happening, I feel like it's changing me and I'm a lesser version of my former self!

Hi ladies. Sad to say bad news from me too. We're on holiday at the moment and I of course packed the pregnancy tests in the vague hope we'd get our bfp in sunnier climes and its be a lovely story. No no. 10dpo AF shows up early so I'm back to the drawing board too and virtually no shagging even for fun on holiday. Double disappointment. We have an NHS and a private appointment when we get back though so I'm trying to be positive about actually getting a plan together. I'm also trying to psyche myself up to say something positive to my best friend when I get back about her pregnancy because my husband has been trying to encourage me to not let it come between us. I know he's right but when I think about what I'll say I just kind of draw a blank. Hopefully it'll be easier when I have had the doctors appointments and feel more like I know what's going to happen with us.
I'm sorry none of us have much good news to share at the moment - don't feel alone though. I'm happy to respond to any rants and tantrums. I definitely have them myself. One day it'll be us by chance or by test tube.

Star I bet that's why, his first was 62% followed by 53% better then average. so I will definitely ask. I don't really have any one to talk to, all my friends are good listeners but they can never understand how it feels, it came so easily to all of them. I'm like you, my best friend has just announced she is pregnant again and i don't want to see her or speak to her . ( can't believe I'm actually writing that )

I think I've always been the strong one, I don't want people to feel sorry for me and to lose that control . ( I know that sounds stupid)
However we have decided that we're going to tell parents/friends after the next appointment, if IVF is definitely confirmed.

Everything came at once last week, late AF, hope, news of Ivf and the fact if I do get pregnant I might miscarry because of this subseptrated uterus and then OH dared to say he wasn't eating his carrots because he doesn't like them and I just went off . ha-ha poor man i felt so much better afterwards. ;-)

I honestly forget how life was like, when my first and last thoughts of the day wasn't so consumed with worry , emptiness and what ifs . However I bet after our next appointments we will both feel more optimistic. Please let us know how you get on . x

Friends I totally understand what you say about not wanting to lose control and tell people. My OH says that's probably why I'm struggling so much with this because no end of planning and charts have worked - I can't control this and I'm a bit of a control freak. We also haven't really told anyone exactly what's going on but we're starting to let people guess we're struggling if that makes sense. Not our families yet though as they'll worry.
I'll certainly keep you guys updated. Weirdly I'd probably be happier if one of you told me you'd gotten pregnant than one of my friends right now and I know that sounds so awful but it would give me a lot more hope. So genuinely good luck to you guys.

Oh geeup,
how crap, the only thing worse then af arriving is af arriving on your jolly's !! but i can guarantee you will feel so much better after your first appointment, having a plan of action feels so much better then just being in limbo trying.

Got to love hubby's advice, he's so right and don't we know it . I think my mate knows I'm avoiding her, without knowing any sort of reason as to why . I must make her feel so crappy as she keeps making so much effort . Does you mate know your trying geeup?
Hope you have a fantastic holiday, and an even better first appointment. Please let us know how you get on and your next plan of action . Hopefully this will be the year for all of us. x

Hi ladies, I really hope this is our year! I feel exactly the same - I'd much rather one of you announced a pregnancy rather than a friend right now. It's awful but each announcement just reminds me how easy it is for everyone else and how unlucky we are .

I saw my best friend this weekend and I didn't mention her pregnancy. I left her house having spent the night with her and her two year old son and burst into tears. I decided that I just want to hide away until this is all over, but my OH said the same as yours Geeup. And they're right - we can't let this ruin our friendships as we will need those friends when we do get pregnant and we're feeling stronger. I've decided to write her an email explaining why I've been such a grump and apologise for ignoring her pregnancy. She knows about our problems, but hopefully if she understands a bit more about how I'm feeling, why she might not get offended if I totally ignore the massive life event going on for her! Hmm, maybe.

Friends, that motility is great! My OH managed 38% then 18%, with 8% morphology and then 2%. Pretty rubbish. Who knows what's going on, but I'm on cd2 now and heading into 19 months ttc.

Sorry about af geeup. I wondered if, at 10 dpo it might be implantation bleeding,but I imagine it's carried on? Anyway, enjoy your holiday and I guarantee you'll feel better once you start putting a plan together.

Oddly, I'm getting full of the hope of a new cycle again. No idea why I think this one will be any different from the last twenty!

Bit of an update from me ladies. Latest private SA for the OH was better which is good news - morph up to 3%! Suggests the fertilaid regime might have helped so he's happy. Dr Ramsay said at that level we should just go away and try naturally for a few more months and get my tubes checked in the meantime. I then had my NHS appt and the consultant was very thorough. He has suggested I have a laparoscopy next under a general anaesthetic which is pretty scary and we weren't really expecting after thinking we'd just be trying naturally for a few more months but whatever it takes right? Has anyone had one?

Ps dr Ramsay and NHS both recommended Proxeed if you're considering supplements. We may change after we finish the pills we still have.

Hi Geeup, good news that you have seen an improvement in DHs results :) I had a laparoscopy in February. I worried myself silly about it beforehand but it was actually FINE. In and out in one day. Bit sore after but nothing too bad and definitely worth it for the peace of mind that everything was ok.

Thanks closephine. How did it work for you in terms of delaying ttc? I obviously won't know till I get a date for the procedure but the consultant said I might need to go on birth control pills to ensure im not pregnant when I go in. He said I can't be having my period and I obviously don't want it to fall when it could be my 2ww so I'm thinking ideally it would be the week after my period but before I ovulate? Then can I try the same cycle? Confused!

Hi Geeup, I had the laparoscopy about 2 days before I ovulated. I was hoping to have it a week earlier and be able to ttc that month but they couldn't fit me in. They told us to use protection (we just didn't DTD in the end, it was a welcome break to be honest!), so we had to have a month off. I had naively thought I might be up to DTD a couple of days after the op. Definitely wasn't tho! So we had a month where there was zero chance of being pregnant and to be honest, it was actually quite nice to not have to think about it for a few weeks.

Hey geeup, that's great news! What was the count and motility if you don't mind me asking? I'd be interested in what Ramsey considers good enough to try naturally. Really glad you're seeing an improvement. We're having a sperm analysis next week after 4 months on proxeed so I'm crossing my fingers hard for an improvement there.

As for me, we had our second consultation last week and the plan is to try Clomid and a trigger shot for three months. We can't try this cycle as my partner's away on a stag during my fertile period so start Clomid at my next cycle in 3 weeks.

Good luck with the laparoscopy!

Hey Ladies.
I will start from the top. Star, I'm feeling very hopeful this month, as you say I don't know why when all the others haven't gone so well, but we've got to have hope right!
I tried the 3,000 Evening Primrose oil for the first half of my cycle and I actually saw an improvement straight away so thanks for that. We also tried the pre-seed this month, OH didn't think it was too bad, but I'm sure it was just the novelty of it all. I'm currently 5 days past ovulation, so fingers crossed!

So there going to try you on Clomid Star. Do you ovulate okay as well? information is so different isn't it, I've read lots of t that if your already ovulating then there's no point in trying Clomid, But then other says it can improve the chances. people do get pregnant, so I'm not sure if to ask to try it as that was the initial plan for me.

Geeup, that sounds really positive. When I read your post, I was surprised that they were asking you to go straight for an a Laparoscopy without an Hsg or anything first ? I'm only wondering as on my initial appointment they thought I might need one to rule out Endometrosis. However because both my ultra sound and HSG was fine and the fact it was never mention again I thought all must be okay.
I would also be interested if anything else was low on OH's sample if you don't mind, It's very interesting that DR Ransdam is happy/ concerned enough with a 1 % difference in morphology, if all the other parameters are good. I really can't believe the difference in opinions on what is okay and what is not.

Also, as any of your OH'S samples included sperm fragmentation ? we was considering maybe having it done at a private clinic, we haven't gone private with anything yet so far so we was wondering the best way to go about it.

Count was 54m so 20m per ml and 67% progressive and 3% morph. He felt this was good enough for a decent shot. I hope it is so much as I really don't want the laparoscopy if I can help it. The NHS consultant felt this was the best route for me as I had my appendix removed after appendicitis and they want to check them scarring isn't blocking things and I don't think the hcg/hycosy will be able to check that.

Good luck with the SA star and I'm also interested in the clomid thing. I ovulate OK as far as we know (NHS just ordered new day 3 tests to add to my day 21 which the GP did) but if clomid makes you release an extra egg or two per cycle that would be interesting.

Friends - does the evening primrose increase cervical mucous? I don't make much ewcm so worth a shot although am already taking fish oils so maybe the same kind of thing?
We haven't had fragmentation or DNA testing yet as Dr Ramsay told us it very expensive and he didn't think it was worth it yet as he was keen for us to just try for a bit longer.

Ps in true over share mode we have Dtd 8 out of the past 9 days (the end of the hols were a bit better than the beginning!). Probably a mistake as probably made his count lower but we thought we'd give it a bash this month as morph had improved. Today is 1dpo. If we can face it well give it one more shot tonight and then have a well earned break! Yesterday I inserted a bit of Preseed which I don't normally do but didn't have any ewcm and it was o day so thought I'd try. If nothing sticks this month, it's over to science...

Geeup, well done on all the dtd! Fingers crossed it works for you this cycle. Your count is similar to ours but your motility is amazing. Good luck!!

You too friends, hope the epo and preseed does the trick!

Yes, I ovulate fine as far as I know. I was temping for about 5 months last year and got a clear rise every cycle. Also did progesterone test at GP which indicated ovulation. So I was so confused when she suggested Clomid and felt like I was being fobbed off to try for a bit longer. But basically she said we can't be 100% sure that I'm ovulating and because I have high amh it's worth trying this before doing ivf as it's less invasive. So we'll see. I really hope it works.

We asked about DNA fragmentation and our Dr said it's expensive and is treated with antioxidants which we're already on, or icsi which we'll do next if Clomid doesn't work. We also asked about anti-sperm antibodies and she said it was really rare so no need to worry at this stage.

Thanks ladies,
I certainly saw an improvement geeup not so much of ew but it felt more of it and lasted for more days. I stopped taking it the second haIf of the cycle as advised.
I do appreciate your insights,with us never seeing a urologist it's good to know what there thoughts are. (Both your OH's counts are very high.)
I think now we have reached the over two years mark they are now allowing IVF, as i know that's the guideline for IVF in our area. However I think trying clomid is a good idea and after alot of thinking, I think I need to at least try the other options too, (no matter what they are offering) I've just started reading zita west's guide to fertility and assisted conception and it's a pretty good book if you haven't read it yet.
I still temp every cycle so pretty sure I'm ovulating, got a blood test booked to confirm before I go back in 3 weeks.

I think the most interesting thing about meeting with Dr Ramsay was that he was less worried about the total count than perhaps we were. He did a calculation of total count X progressive motility and that was the number he cared most ie total progressive count.
I don't feel hugely confident though. Knowing that our count changed from less than 7m with 27% motility in Feb to our most recent one in April is both a blessing and a curse. Who knows whether we've slipped back down again after a holiday and a couple of weddings. My OH is being v good about taking the vitamins and cutting back on booze but doesn't want to put our lives on hold by going teetotal which he did in January (ie 3 mths before latest results) when we have loads of weddings and parties over the summer. So I don't know if the counts will have just crashed down for the sperm produced in February onwards. I do understand - he's right we can't put our lives on hold when it hasn't worked to date but it looks like it helped! Tough isn't it...

Friends, I think it's so different between clinics what you'll be offered. My consultant thinks trying Clomid for a few cycles is a good idea, but bizarrely it'a not nhs funded so we're paying £400/cycle. Our ivf will be funded so it's confusing. It was a bit weird that she just assumed we could afford that and never even asked!

Geeup, I understand the worry but you never know - that period being teetotal might just be enough to get you pregnant then it won't matter (except you won't be able to drink at the weddings!) Try not to worry, there's only so much you can do and it's awful to put your life on hold for this when it's taking so long.

Wow geeup, what an improvement. I do see what you mean the control freak in me would have all sorts of plans to keep that score up after seeing such an improvement. My OH is similar to yours, he's willing to take the vitamins and cut down but he won't stop doing the things he enjoys. I wish I had the same mentality as him because the stress of being good and perfect isn't good either. I was soo pissed last week, It was honestly the first time I felt like me and I liked it. So I'm going to try let go a bit more. ;-).
Star, very interesting, I wonder why not? I wonder if it would be available if they thought/new you wasn't ovulating.?.
£400 a cycle is pretty expensive, does that include the scans etc. Very cheeky she assumed that you could just afford it. What would they have done if you said you couldn't I wonder. Are they gonna try you on a low dosage first?
Good luck for the rest of this cycle ladies. :-D

Thanks! AF due for me on Sunday 22nd (we'll be on weekend away with friends so hoping that'll keep my mind off it). Then I have my pre assessment at the hospital on the Tuesday for my laparoscopy so feel like if/when AF comes, at least I have the next step in the running so won't feel so hopeless...
Good luck with the clomid - could be just the boost you need xx