Here's a joke for you that you couldn't tell on hunsnet, just to lighten the mood...
A man has a terrible accident with some machinery and, tragically, gets his cock cut off.
He sees a consultant who reassures him that a prosthetic alternative can transform the situation, and spells out his options...there's the NHS model, your basic four inches, but free. Then there's the Premier version, which is eight inches, but costs a thousand pounds. And then there is the Super Deluxe version, which is twelve inches, a vibrating function, and it also spins 360 degrees. It costs five grand though.
The consultant lets him go out into the lobby to discuss it with his wife, who says that the NHS one would be fine by her. "Listen love," says the man, "I've got some money put aside, and there are a couple of policies I can cash in that I haven't told you about, so I'm thinking we can afford to push the boat out a bit here..."
Ten minutes later, the man goes back into the consulting room, and the doctor asks him what he is going to go for.
"NHS please, doctor- we're getting a new kitchen."