Shouldn’t this funeral director be arrested? *MNHQ warning - distressing content*

[MissyB1]

I will post the link (hopefully works). Surely there must be something she could be charged with? And her “business” needs closing down! It’s just beyond words!
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c4gjr0ylenzo

other countries have specific law for interference with dead body . Uk doesn’t unless it’s related to something else which I don’t want to mention here

if the law was appropriate we would have regulations set up for this too

disgusting .. poor mum

The lack of understanding or compassion around this case is as sickening as the case itself.

Why do you think we need to lock up a grieving traumatised mother who hasn't broken any laws and who meant no harm by her actions?? The media handling of this case is irresponsible. Anyone with half a brain knew as soon as they described the scene at the funeral director's home that she was dealing with mental health issues and struggling to come to terms with her own bereavement. But the BBC hasn't said one word about that. Impartial? My arse!

This is utterly tragic for all those involved. It deserves compassion, not judgement and condemnation. I expected better from Mumsnet

This woman is seriously unwell and should not ever have been in this role. Her own child died due to DV.

Absolutely not defending what the woman did but in other countries dead bodies are usually taken back to the families house and stay there until the funeral, but this is their tradition and of course they are aware of it. Poor mother.

It is not a good thing if it is not explicitly what the parents wish to happen and actively makes their lives and loss harder.

If she hasn't asked them if is what they wanted then she's not thinking of them at all, only herself.

That's quite a common euphemism

Me too - it's a lazy storyline for too many writers. It paints us as unstable when we are grieving a hideous loss.
This poor woman needs help and support, as do the families whose used her "services".

The one with the initials LP?

Yes

This is beyond awful, that poor mum

I can't believe it's so unregulated, and that this isn't illegal.

There was a man jailed earlier this year for not declaring his partner had died and just leaving her body in the living room, but apparently that crime was preventing a lawful burial, not living with a dead person.

It's sad all ends up but my sympathy is limited and I think that she needs to be arrested. You can't do that to somebody else's deceased loved one. How is the mother ever going to get over seeing that? It's the absolute stuff of nightmares. I'm shuddering just thinking about it. The disrespect of a corpse and of the family members beggars belief. If she wanted to play those games then there are plenty of those life-like baby dolls available.
I hope the families are getting help for this.

No. You cannot compare sitting deceased babies in bouncers and watching television with other cultural norms.

And as the bereaved mother of stillborn son I cannot tell you how distressing it is that anyone thinks this is acceptable.

Was she banned for this?

I don't often do this on here, as I respect differences in opinion. But you are wrong. In Victorian times you'd do it with your OWN child perhaps, but to sit other people's dead babies in a chair and putting cartoons on for them is absolutely unhinged. There is no excuse for it and I would be heartbroken if my dead baby was treated in this way.

I was really shocked reading this earlier. If I was that mum I would have absolutely lost my shit seeing that.

Well she has caused harm, her needs dont trump anyone else's.

In Ireland (where i work as a midwife), it is very normal for families to borrow one of the cold cots from the hospital and take their baby home for a night. Oftentimes the baby will then be buried alongside a (already deceased) family member like a grandad the next day. This wouldn't be all families but I'd say over half of families would do this. It can be a great comfort to families to have their much loved little one with them. We have an amazing bereavement midwife that co-ordinates and liases with all the services, and does all the memory making bits (depending on what the family want).

I agree with you
it’s very shocking

This was the weirdest thing I've read in a while, which considering hundreds people are rioting about an immigrant touching a girl's leg and saying he wants babies (used to be standard in the 90's, not that that makes it right) is saying something.
I deeply feel this woman has not come to terms with the death of her own child and this is some weird limbo land she has created for herself to "help" deal with the trauma. It's clearly batshit but I don't think it is intended to upset other parents.

This has surely got to be some kind of mental illness? I can understand the home environment as to some that might feel less clinical than a funeral home but ‘watching cartoons’? This lady needs help.

Absolutely dreadful, she sounds seriously sick. However, the article says that there are no regulations on who can be an undertaker, or on correct storage of bodies. This needs to be addressed, and I would suggest bringing it to the notice of your MP, as I shall be doing.

In order to arrest someone, you have to have suspicion that they have broken a law. But from some apparently well-informed posts on this thread, it seems that she very probably has not broken any laws. Perhaps a law is needed, but in the meantime there's not much that the legal system can do.

What you do in your own home with your own child is your business.
Thar is not this.
This woman has taken people’s lost babies. Telling them she will look after them and then she’s used them like dolls to make her feel something.
This is unspeakably awful.
And how does anybody who used this service know they buried the right body? Or indeed a body at all? I am staggered the industry is not regulated but even more staggered that a hospital trust let somebody so fucked up near sone of their most vulnerable patients.

It does worry me that some men might now register as funeral directors and do terrible things. I can imagine a certain type of man thinking this would be a great sideline for angry ex husbands or something...grim. The law really needs updating - this is on the heels of that weirdo sexually abusing corpses at his funeral home last year too.