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Grandma responsible for death of 2nd Grandchild

218 replies

JustAskingThisQ · 29/01/2025 16:21

https://www.wdhn.com/news/florida-grandmother-who-left-infant-in-hot-car-found-not-guilty-of-manslaughter/

I'm just watching this trial on YouTube and thought I'd look it up properly. This child, Uriel, was 7 months old and she left her in a hot car. Previously, she was looking after a toddler grandchild (same daughter's child) who slipped away while she was asleep and drowned.

I'm just gobsmacked.

OP posts:
DoYouReally · 29/01/2025 17:41

This story is horrendous.

How the hell for you let two kids die in your care? Especially after the first vase, surely you would be glued to the second one knowing that it only takes a minute for something to happen.

I don't have kids but babysit for family and friends a fair bit. There's only one job - you make sure you return the child in the exact same way they arrived. I think for a lot of parents, it takes a lot for them to trust others to mind their kids and not always easy to leave them for a while. To not look after them when they trust you with the most precious thing in their lives - simply horrendous.

I hope they re-open the first investigation too. 5 years is pathetic for what she has done.

wordler · 29/01/2025 17:47

So the advice is to put something you need to take into the office with you in the backseat next to the baby - so your jacket or briefcase so that if you go into autopilot mode you will still look for your jacket.

Yourfootisinmysirachamayo · 29/01/2025 17:47

God I really shouldn't have read this thread. Especially the similar stories people have posted.

oakleaffy · 29/01/2025 17:49

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

I didn't read this as a ''joke''.. I'm certain the poster didn't mean it that way.
After one careless negligent death, to have yet another IS unforgivable.

The grandmother was asleep while the first toddler drowned, zero child safety locks on the doors.

This woman most definitely isn't suitable for supervising any child.

Gazelda · 29/01/2025 17:51

Yourfootisinmysirachamayo · 29/01/2025 17:47

God I really shouldn't have read this thread. Especially the similar stories people have posted.

It's pretty ghoulish, isn't it.

Rather than horror or sympathy for this particular child's death, posters wanting to put their own "what about the case of ..." seems in poor taste.

It comes across as gossip about child tragedies.

oakleaffy · 29/01/2025 17:51

DoYouReally · 29/01/2025 17:41

This story is horrendous.

How the hell for you let two kids die in your care? Especially after the first vase, surely you would be glued to the second one knowing that it only takes a minute for something to happen.

I don't have kids but babysit for family and friends a fair bit. There's only one job - you make sure you return the child in the exact same way they arrived. I think for a lot of parents, it takes a lot for them to trust others to mind their kids and not always easy to leave them for a while. To not look after them when they trust you with the most precious thing in their lives - simply horrendous.

I hope they re-open the first investigation too. 5 years is pathetic for what she has done.

Agreed- If one is looking after other people's children, you need to be absolutely on the ball at all times. To fall asleep in the first case, and then to ''forget'' for three hours the next- she's not a suitable carer.

Shezlong · 29/01/2025 17:51

It's incredible that both incidents happened within a year! I assumed it must have taken a while for the parents to trust the grandmother again, but within a year!! Something seems very off about this.

Greyish2025 · 29/01/2025 17:51

JustAskingThisQ · 29/01/2025 16:46

I know it's awful but I couldn't help thinking of family dinners either. It's one of those situations where you do sort of laugh incredulously because you just can't imagine how you deal with that.

There wouldn’t be any more family dinners with her if it was me but I also wouldn’t have let her look after the second child if she had been partly responsible for the death of the first one…..absolute craziness, the woman was clearly not capable of keeping watch over children, the parents are partly to blame for this…

Bignanna · 29/01/2025 17:55

VotingForYourself · 29/01/2025 17:18

Thats not the same thing at all. Why do you recall that?

I imagine it’s because the Chinese lady may have been thought to be negligent in the way the child was apparently being carried?

Yourfootisinmysirachamayo · 29/01/2025 17:55

Gazelda · 29/01/2025 17:51

It's pretty ghoulish, isn't it.

Rather than horror or sympathy for this particular child's death, posters wanting to put their own "what about the case of ..." seems in poor taste.

It comes across as gossip about child tragedies.

I agree. I know people will say I shouldn't have clicked on it but I didn't expect there to be so much gruesome, distressing detail about other cases too.

I'm 3 months postpartum too so the hormones probably aren't helping! I'm sat here holding my tiny baby and imagining her being dropped over the side of an escalator or out of a window.

oakleaffy · 29/01/2025 17:57

Dr Todd Grande speaks of ''Forgotten Baby Syndrome''

{Evidently it's a syndrome} around the 7 minute and onward mark.

Choccyscofffy · 29/01/2025 17:59

Bubblybits · 29/01/2025 16:56

I’m British, and sometimes I think sarcasm is misplaced and inappropriate. The people who have liked my comment presumably agree.

Anyway, this story reminds me of the grandparent that accidentally held a child up to a window on a ferry that was open, and the child fell to their death in front of the parents. Truly tragic and I’ve no idea how you forgive - I know I couldn’t.

Do you mean the grandfather who put his grand baby out of the Royal Caribbean cruise liner?

The baby’s parents sued RC and lost, the courts ruled that the dangers of dangling a baby over a railing are so obvious that RC couldn’t have foreseen an accident.

TheignT · 29/01/2025 17:59

bettbburg · 29/01/2025 17:13

This. I'd really struggle to leave any child in her care.

I wondered if they thought the same thing couldn't happen if the child wasn't mobile. Of course it wasnt the same but the result was if that makes any sense.

SchoolDilemma17 · 29/01/2025 18:00

TomatoSandwiches · 29/01/2025 16:48

I don't know why they even allowed her to look after their second child, they are much more forgiving then I ever would be.

I really don’t understand that at all. I would never leave her alone with a child again. And rhe reason wasn’t even work but that mum went to the hairdresser!

Littoralzone · 29/01/2025 18:02

Opink · 29/01/2025 17:01

A headteacher no less. I can’t believe the mother allowed another one of her children to ever be in the GM’s presence unsupervised again. The mum said she thought it would be fine as the grandmother was going to a restaurant with friends. But still shocking judgement.

It’s just such an unbelievable case.

In my experience it is often more dangerous to leave a baby or toddler in the care of several adults than it is in the care of one. They all assume someone else is looking out for them so no one takes responsibility. Plus they are all distracted by each other.

GreenApplesRedApplesYellowApples · 29/01/2025 18:03

Weepixie · 29/01/2025 17:23

A friend of mine was looking after one of her grandchildren and the little boy wandered outside whilst she was making his lunch and drowned in the family pool which was to all interns and purposes childproof. To this day I don’t know exactly what happened as my friend now lives a life of almost total silence and has never seen her daughter and other grandchildren again. Neither has she any relationship with another of her daughters but she does with her other 2 children and their children.

It’s all just so terrible.

Edited

That's very sad. I feel for your friend. The internal guilt must be unimaginable.

I have anxiety even looking after other people's children. It's not a responsibility I am looking forward to ever having in regards to possible GC.

butterdish93 · 29/01/2025 18:03

Why would you leave your child alone with this woman after the first time. Not blaming the child's mum but I just can't imagine it.

Blinky21 · 29/01/2025 18:04

WiddlinDiddlin · 29/01/2025 17:15

At what point are parents deemed responsible when they make a decision to leave someone in charge of their child, who has already shown that they can't be trusted?

I asked this when Ellie Lawrenson was killed by her Uncles pitbull.

In that case, the child was left with Grandma who lived with Uncle, and was at the time in charge of the dog.

The dog had had complaints about its behaviour made before. It had attacked another child resulting in a leg injury/stitched wound. It was known to be aggressive, and the Uncle owned it with the intention that it be aggressive...the dog was 'trained' by being kicked and beaten by his owner.

The parents knew the dog was there, knew that Grandma was a drug user. They insisted the dog be shut out whilst the child was there as they were aware of prior incidents and complaints, and the dogs general nature and the reason it had been purchased, but it was new years eve and the dog was scared of fireworks so Grandma let him in.

Ellies parents did not, in my opinion, behave responsibly in leaving their child in the care of this person, but they were not charged with anything. Grandma was found not guilty of manslaughter, despite having drunk two bottles of wine that night and smoked 'up to' ten joints, in the period she was looking after Ellie.

The only penalty anyone received in this case was the dogs owner, who did a few weeks for owning a dangerous dog.

So what does it take for a legal system to decide the parents who chose to leave their child in an incompetent persons care, are also responsible for that childs death?

But you are talking about a family with a presumably chaotic lifestyle who most probably did not have the benefit of multiple options or support

Bubblybits · 29/01/2025 18:04

oakleaffy · 29/01/2025 17:49

I didn't read this as a ''joke''.. I'm certain the poster didn't mean it that way.
After one careless negligent death, to have yet another IS unforgivable.

The grandmother was asleep while the first toddler drowned, zero child safety locks on the doors.

This woman most definitely isn't suitable for supervising any child.

I didn’t mean the bit about it being twice (I agree about that), I meant the sarcastic sentence about how Christmas dinner must be strained 😕 There are ways to say you’re wondering how it impact family dynamics without making a joke about Christmas dinner.

Bubblybits · 29/01/2025 18:05

Choccyscofffy · 29/01/2025 17:59

Do you mean the grandfather who put his grand baby out of the Royal Caribbean cruise liner?

The baby’s parents sued RC and lost, the courts ruled that the dangers of dangling a baby over a railing are so obvious that RC couldn’t have foreseen an accident.

Yes, sorry, I didn’t get the details quite right but it was a cruise ship rather than a ferry.

HeronWing · 29/01/2025 18:06

Bubblybits · 29/01/2025 18:04

I didn’t mean the bit about it being twice (I agree about that), I meant the sarcastic sentence about how Christmas dinner must be strained 😕 There are ways to say you’re wondering how it impact family dynamics without making a joke about Christmas dinner.

I think it’s quite clear that people use gallows humour to deal with something absolutely unbearable to contemplate.

Juliagreeneyes · 29/01/2025 18:06

Ach, such terrible cases! I too cannot understand how they would trust the grandmother again, even if they thought the first time was a tragic accident.

I had hypervigilance when DD was small, after a traumatic birth. I was paranoid about my parents looking after her for quite a long time, just because I was aware how easy it is to make a tragic mistake. My mum had a habit of dozing off when babysitting, and my dad once let toddler DD slide down an unsuitable slide and bang her head. So I decided I just couldn’t let them babysit DD alone until she was a bit older - that’s just how it is sometimes. Probably nothing awful would have happened, but why take the risk unless you absolutely have to?

oakleaffy · 29/01/2025 18:08

Littoralzone · 29/01/2025 18:02

In my experience it is often more dangerous to leave a baby or toddler in the care of several adults than it is in the care of one. They all assume someone else is looking out for them so no one takes responsibility. Plus they are all distracted by each other.

100% this.

A tragedy happened at an outdoor 'Pool' party where a young child drowned-Each parent thought the other had the child, there was lots of alcohol and noise from shrieking children and teens..the little one wasn't noticed.

Weepixie · 29/01/2025 18:12

JANEY205 · 29/01/2025 17:27

@Weepixie is that because your friends daughters cut her off? How terribly awful for them all

I think it’s the punishment she’s given herself. She spends most of her time sitting in her bedroom in silence and when I saw her in a supermarket just last week she just put her head down. I’m told the children and grandchildren who are still in her life get minimal interaction with her when they’re together but she will come out of her room and speak with them as well as eat with them.

I was so shocked when I saw her recently and I just now she’s waiting to die.

Bubblybits · 29/01/2025 18:13

HeronWing · 29/01/2025 18:06

I think it’s quite clear that people use gallows humour to deal with something absolutely unbearable to contemplate.

I’m aware, but it being commonplace doesn’t make it acceptable imo. There are 21 others who have reacted to my post, so I assume they feel the same. This poor family has been ripped apart - I’m glad I can keep my humour to appropriate situations and not type out everything I think.