Three woman murdered in Hertfordshire.

[BodenCardiganNot]

Absolutely shocking. A 26 year old man named as Kyle Clifford, believed to be armed with a crossbow, is being sought by police.
The dead women are aged 61, 28 and 25.

I stand by what i said.

It's not all men. But it's always a man. We would be wise not to forget that.

Be careful who you date.

These men are clever. They often don’t show red flags until it’s too late and women are trapped by fear. Besides it isn’t just the men you date that you have to worry about. A family friend’s daughter was raped and murdered by a man whom she’d rejected. The 15 year old girl who had a PT job at the salon I used was killed by the owner of a deli she bought her lunch from. It isn’t just partners that women have to worry about.

R.I.P Laura and Paige.

The problem with MN is that a small proportion of very vocal people push their views forward and expect those who are not of the same opinion to shut up. I was a criminal defence solicitor for part of my career, I also represented the family of a woman where the husband shot the children and wife and then committed suicide. I have met murderers and rapists so I do have direct experience of these matters. In my personal life I have never encountered any male who behaves in this way and in my professional life it was very clear that these 30 odd individuals were far from normal. There has been utter unreasonable hysteria on this thread about aborting male babies and not engaging with men, also the comment about not being a mother because of the possibility the child would be an abuser or a victim, utterly inappropriate. I don’t need approval for my perfectly normal views on this matter.

Plenty of posters have talked sensibly about the stats of male violence. When you see statements like " men are trash" or " pay a man tax" you need to recognise them for what they are: the anger that women are still being slaughtered in huge numbers by men they love. It's venting because we can't do much else.

Indeed, apparently we can't even name the problem because our Nigels may feel hurt.

We also need to stamp out the views in certain cultures that support women being second rate as actually that's a huge problem. The elephant in the room! In the meantime, I'll be still telling my daughter to be 'careful who she dates' the same way my Dad told me.

This.

You're entitled to your views.

As others have pointed out though, when men kill women - its the women who are the victims, not the men.

If the number of victims is anything to go by, aka #MeToo, it's not just a hateful minority either. Assault and abuse of women is not what you might call rare. That would amount to a LOT of men.

It's not always a man. What a shite thing to state.

Exactly. Reason I have not dated since becoming a lone parent with Dd.

I’d rather die alone than risk either of our lives or health on a man. I don’t care how many ‘nice ones’ there are, I don’t trust a single one. We are happy and healthy and safe now.

Bringing a man into the mix feels life threatening. Men will even kill their own children when they don’t get their own way. I could never do it to Dd

In your (chosen) career, you will certainly have seen the worst a man can do.

But crimes like that what has happened today, are not the norm, even for a man's standards.

Its very easy to say you don't know any men who would do something like this, but you'll know plenty who would do something a lot ''lower level''.

🤨

This is so powerful.

Carol, Hannah and Louise were here 36 hours ago. Their murders will forever be a torment to their family and loved ones.

And yet, unbelievably tragically, there will be 3 more names in a week.

Well they should stop doing so many shite things then shouldn't they?

Oh, I see, we have the racist dogwhistles coming out.

There are plenty of white British men who think that women are property and plenty of social messaging reinforcing that, but let's pick on "certain cultures".

The problem with telling your daughter to "be careful who she dates" is that she then feels that it's her fault if her Prince Charming turns out to be an abusive toad.

I'm just so tired of reading these stories. Women making a choice not to be with a man and then loosing their life. I lost a friend many years ago when she left a relationship and it's just so saddening that the world hasn't changed and has actually just got worse.
I'm rambling. But it's really got me this evening.
Rest in peace to those three beautiful women. And all the others that have gone before you.

It's almost always a man, over 95% of the time.

Agreed. I'd go as far as to say that it's most men (as in an actual majority) who would/have/will abuse a woman or child in some way.

100% this! ^

Yes. This. ^

Absolutely right.
Tell her to trust her instincts- They are there for a reason.
If she feels in any way unsure of anyone- Man or woman- listen hard to those feelings.

Never stick with a man who controls or raises his hand or throws stuff.
I had two friends as a younger woman who dated violent men.

But they returned to these vile specimens time after time after time.

It was ridiculous. One of them broke free- but the other..I'd guess she is still with him, despite him tampering with the brakes on her mother's car and putting her in hospital.

I can't understand why women stay with men like this. One was free from him for years and went back and had children with him.

So utterly depressing. But it was her choice! ''I love him'' was all she'd say.

I remember watching a video of a police officer after he had gone into a house where the murderer had killed his girlfriend and three children and you could hear his voice shake. I can't imagine how hard that is to deal with even with all the training.

It was in Derbyshire.

It's completely appropriate for me to decide not to have kids for whatever reasons I choose.

It's not appropriate for you to police my decision and underlying motives.

I was eight the first time I was sexually assaulted. The perpetrators were no older than 11. I refuse to risk a DD suffering such an experience and I refuse to risk a DS perpetrating it. I stand by that.

We should also probably have a fat people tax then, even for fat people with no current medical conditions, since obesity is the biggest strain on the NHS.

Let’s also have an ethnic minority tax, even for people who have committed no crimes, because ethnic minorities are responsible for proportionally more crimes than white people.

The taxes should definitely be levied on entire groups of people, irrespective of individuals’ levels of involvement.