That?s very interesting Lulu. If your perception about being accused of rape actually being worse than being raped is a common one, then we really are in trouble. And correct me if I?m wrong, but no one is saying being falsely accused is a ?walk in the park?. I am certainly not. I have already said, the costs to a man falsely accused are many ? and they are very easily measured ? as are the costs to women, both raped and especially those women raped and not believed. That is a terrible fate, but one 95% of all rape victims must endure.
If it were common, it would also be a misconception. The costs incurred by women far outstrip any loss of status that a man might suffer, which is the main grievance it seems. Men accused of rape are rarely abandoned by their partners for instance, where rape victims are ? and their kids as the man is more likely so see the rape as an act of cuckoldry and doubt the paternity of any children. Men might feel they have to move, and they do so ? a woman who is raped, is felt by her partner and who has dependent children (this is a common scenario, I?m not making this up for effect) is not so lucky in her choices. She is more likely to want to say close to her family for any support they can give (if she hasn?t been disowned by them) and that means staying ostracised in the wider community ? and a mothers low status effects her children?s chances to thrive.
But I?d try to get out of your mind the idea that she would be ?okay? if only because the CSA would still demand the father provide for the kids ? if you think the stats for successful rape prosecution are bad here ? you should look elsewhere and away from liberal democracies. The majority of women in prison in Pakistan are there for the crime of being raped for instance. So the idea that it is a worse crime for a man to be accused than a woman to be raped is pretty much global ? and this, I suspect, has a lot to do with male perspective bias, which has no idea of what it is to be raped or what is at stake, for self and family, emotionally and materially and so these costs to women have been ignored or diminished over the, well, over epochs probably. But evolutionary theory informs us of just how costly it is for a woman to be raped in direct comparison to the costs of being accused ? falsely (which occurs rarely) or otherwise. .
I am actually working on an essay about this at the moment.
VVV, the evidence points to rape being about sex, control and to a lesser degree violence ? but sex is very high in the mix. Even radical feminists are stepping down from that claim these days. Not that they do it very publicly unfortunately.