Nicola Bulley 10

[lemmein]

Fuck it, I'm opening another one. If the mods delete it fair enough.

I don't believe the menopause or even alcoholism explains a woman vanishing into thin air with no evidence left behind.

This whole case stinks!

Yes.

They have said from the start that the path wasn't covered by cctv. As part of this they said they had identified 700 vehicles they were contacting the owners of to try to get dash cam footage. They are not just starting this it has been ongoing from the very start.

It was said on an earlier thread that S. Riley was doing the press conferences so it wasn't obvious who the sio was, there's a lot of things about the comms now making sense.

That's a question for them I think.

Perhaps the man was just trying to protect his little girls? and exactly how was he doing that by going on national television, being part of a documentary just days in, giving interviews claiming that this was all out of character and that she definitely wasn’t in that river?

Given all of this is all over the press, in ten years time when those girls are old enough to go looking on google to see what happened when their mum disappeared, they will find all this false narative from their own family in there.

The most relevant hampering of the police investigation has come from the family.

The whole family are living their worst nightmare - there isn’t a handbook what to do when your much loved family member disappears . PA is making it up as he goes along , trying to protect his girls and his partners privacy so she might feel able to come back if she has taken herself of ( just one of the options) . Any of us in the same position would be equally lost and liable to make mistakes .

I feel incredibly sorry for all of them . Menopause is shit , many of us get that and I really hope if she is out there that she does get the help she needs and isn’t destroyed by all this awful speculation.

I think that maybe the TV appearance was one one person: Nicola, Paul's way to reach out and try to convince her to come home.

I think they will look back and see that their father tried to protect them, that he didn't want their mothers struggles plastered across the media

Perhaps he didn't think it was relevant for the world to know, he shared the information with the police , you know the people who are actually looking for her

Unfortunately it has.

@confounded234 how had it hampered it? The police were told from the beginning

By publicly challenging the police and bringing in their own experts. I defend PF but his presence created obvious tension with the police, as SI Riley failed to (attempt to) hide

@confounded234 wouldn't you do anything to find your family member? Blaming the family is truly awful

I endured the pain of 24 hours of a missing family member (found dead). Those hours were beyond horrendous. I could recognise that pain and horror in Nicola’s parents face.

It’s clear that’s there is a lot more to this than we know. I find the menopause and alcohol information and the reference to the family finding it challenging very odd. It’s very sad

I don't know what I would do. But I probably wouldn't have gone on television to say that I had no idea why she would go away (when I had), nothing in her behaviour suggested it (when it did), and I cannot possibly see how she is in the river (when her belongings were found next to it and she was already known to have MH issues). how would that help anyone?

It makes absolute sense because accepting she’s drowned is harder than clinging to hope she might still be alive somehow. It also means they can avoid feelings of perhaps I should have noticed something was up that morning and I could have prevented it. You can see this touched on in the interview when he says that morning was odd as no chaos everything was ready. They also wanted every avenue explored and to release details to public/PF re her issues may have led to less of a response as it’d be oh it’s suicide. It’s telling her parents seemed to stand back perhaps they reached acceptance sooner or felt uncomfortable with the withholding of detail. It all makes perfect sense to me.

It is every family's worst nightmare. God knows how I would react if my partner disappeared with out trace. I think instinctively many of us would not want to reveal any private struggles the person was having - as it would feel incredibly disloyal to make public such private matters. If there were concerns she had 'ran away' , they would no doubt be worried this might tip her over the edge.

The crux of my posts are from the statements the police published has led to the media labelling NB, which I have consistently said is wrong, not that the police used the words.

The media and all sources, to which the majority of the general population gather their information, will use words which draw attention to their publication - so following the police publishing information yesterday, those words will be as I have stated in previous posts.

Once again, I have said it is wrong and NB should not be labelled with anything other than she is missing.

Yes it's not the truth is it.

Spot on

I believe the police were painted into a corner and had to release the fact or her alcoholism and alluding to self harm .Both because they needed to explain the reason fir the river theory, and also because it was likely someone else would tell the press.
This having been done it was necessary to prevent the public jumping to the conclusion that her partner was abusive if the reason for this was not given.
I

I have read that the police explained Paul Ansell's black eye yesterday but I can't find the explanation. Does anyone know?

Perhaps he didn't think it was relevant for the world to know, he shared the information with the police , you know the people who are actually looking for her and then he went on national television, said that her disappearance was out of character, that the police were in the wrong to be searching the river or assuming she would harm herself.

It’s one thing to have wanted the information kept out of the public domain and to not want it to be spoken about. It’s quite another to have given the police that knowledge and to then actively go to the press and state the exact opposite in order to discredit their investigation.

I’m not sure how old some posters questioning the effect of menopause are. Peri and menopausal symptoms can be debilitating (often women don’t even link the two eg assuming 45 too young as is being done on this thread). Just a quick look around female friends this age when you scratch beneath the surface reveal self medicating with excess alcohol or many being on antidepressants. I think it’s very valid to raise the mental health implications because women still don’t understand the effect it can often have. Suicides are greatest in women of this age for a reason.