Nicola Bulley 10

[lemmein]

Fuck it, I'm opening another one. If the mods delete it fair enough.

I don't believe the menopause or even alcoholism explains a woman vanishing into thin air with no evidence left behind.

This whole case stinks!

Does this work the other way as well - if this was a male alcoholic?

I understood it was not appropriate to point fingers at the family…..as the cause of her disappearance or her emotional state / problematic drinking?

I am most certainly not saying MH is shameful in any way, but to say again NB is now labelled unstable, menopausal and an alcoholic. She may or may not be all of these, but she will forever be labelled as such whether dead or alive. I find that sad and wrong, and has happened as a direct result of the information published today.

Maybe not the best context, but if you mention the Yorkshire ripper, many people will say "yes he murdered all those prostitutes", when in fact many of the women were not prostitutes yet they are labelled as such.

Prior to today NB was the missing woman in Lancs with 2 daughters and a spaniel, now she is the mentally unstable, menopausal, alcoholic woman missing in Lancs. To say again I think this is wrong.

Who's releasing all the pictures of her drinking to the press? Fucking outrageous. They are just pictures of her having a drink with mates, everyone has got those pictures.

My money is on the cops

Mine too. Those photos are meant to illustrate their narrative on the same day they release a statement about her vulnerabilities and access her Facebook.

Yes the same. How do we actually know this!? How do the police? Who's put this out there in the first place?
Unless Nicola has a medical diagnosis then I think either issues could have been exaggerated or made up.

Yes I think it would apply the other way. All I meant was in my experience people with alcohol issues drink for a reason - grief, loss, dealing with past/present abuse etc I just didn’t find it helpful to label her like that and question why this information would be made public. It just seems like a deflection to me.

I can’t imagine the police released their statements, about vulnerability and then the more specific issues, and their recent crisis visit to the home, without the partner’s knowledge. It could have been at his request, even after the Channel 5 programme painting a happy domestic picture.

I can't believe the bitching going on here. Yes, I have contributed to the post a few times but I think we should maybe stop now because every single scenario has been covered. And some people are being incredibly nasty.

Nikki if you are out there, please go home. It doesn't matter what other people think or say about you. We've all experienced negativity at some point in our lives. Some of us have felt lost and been in despair, but it can and will get better. What matters is that you are safe. Your girls need you x

They could be as frustrated with perceived inconsistencies as the family is with perceived inefficiencies.

Having issues with alcohol doesn’t mean being permanently drunk. It can strain a relationship to its limits. Some of my wider family do. Yet they’re never drunk, the way anyone outside, looking in, would see it.

If the person who found the dog called the number on her tag, it would show the time of a missed call (as would PA’s attempts to call because Nicola was out later than usual with the dog). Was the dog apparently alone there for over an hour?

This. The police being called & NB possibly being being drunk isn’t evidence of “significant issue with alcohol” either.

This. They’ve got themselves into a right mess in possibly a misguided attempt to protect Nicola and her family. And even now it’s backfired again because they did the same thing by not mentioning what the vulnerabilities were straight off this morning so they’ve had to release another statement to get ahead of whatever a journalist or internet sleuth has got hold of this evening.

Suboptimal comms + massive national media campaign by friends probably isn’t a great combination.

Exactly this

Very strange. There is old photos floating around on Facebook that have been found of Emma and Dan Walker together. (The guy who did the channel 5 programme)

No-one told me that menopause came with a side order of alcoholism and vanishing into thin air. Wtaf?

Yes I saw that. I suppose it's helpful for Nicola's family that she has friends with connections.

EW is also apparently connected to the hotel or whatever it was that the DW and PA interview took place in.

I didn't realise she set up the Go Fund Me page as well.

This information should never have been released. It's a disgrace that the police force were allowed to do this. This does not benefit Nicola or her family in any way. Nobody needed to know that the police and health care workers had to attend their home last month, nobody!!
The only selfish reason that this Information was released is that the chief investigator leading this case could not hack the speculation that the investigation could have been lead better as people were saying that the force were receiving for concentrating too much on the river theory.
This woman should resign, shame on her to reveal these personal details that the general public certainly had no right to know. This poor woman and her family have been badly let down. I am disgusted by this chief of investigation in this case, she is a disgrace to all women, completely selfish, thinking only of herself and how this information would back up her reasoning to focus on the river.

Is the partner hiding something if these revelations have come from him, things the family are seemingly not aware of. Watching happy valley might have influenced me but it is like he is suddenly deflecting from himself with this public revelation about her 'problems'. Or are the police exaggerating based on the fact they got called out to some kind of domestic where nobody was charged and nothing appears to have actually happened (so the couple might be having some personal problems too?). I read it as classic trying to paint the victim as a pitiful female with hysteria who isn't worth our time rather than an attractive, healthy mother and member of society. I imagine the stress of menopause and worries around ageing and presumably her boyfriend calling the police on her and fears about other professionals getting involved might have resulted in her wanting to commit suicide however.

Just to add if they were called out to a potential suicide threat/attempt that clarifies things...but might be entirely coincidental to what actually happened to her and their job is to thoroughly investigate that.

I see the partner shared his concerns with the police initially but didn't share it with the private investigator or public (whilst asserting she wasn't likely to be in the river....to keep other avenues of investgation going?) So just to clarify I'm not pointing fingers at PA, just wondering at how reliable his account is (men often really don't understand women's emotions and menopause...and whether there was any actual mental health involvement or if this was the result of a bad relationship dynamic instead.) I assume it was considered harmful to the investigation publicity initially but they'd rather right it off now and have largely decided it was a suicide and she is definatley no more as others have said. If that was all over the news I wouldn't be coming back if I was still alive somewhere!!

I'm concerned that if she chose to disappear for a while because life was difficult, then knowing that the whole country has been made aware of her "vulnerabilities" could push her over the edge!

Just laying here thinking ...

Her dog was found next to/near the river.

If she'd walked off or been abducted, and the dog wasn't on a lead, wouldn't it have followed her as far as possible and then been found near where she was last seen. I doubt the dog would have stayed at the river!

Strongly disagree

This guy is weird AF!

The menopause angle in particular seems so unnecessary and 'off'. It's like the modern day 'hysteria'' label made to make women sound unstable.

We are all now thinking of NB as a mentally ill alcoholic instead of a possible victim. Why would the police want that given they know no more about what happened to her than on the day she went missing. I just wonder if they had to release that information before someone else was going to..

@IrritableCowSyndrome yes I agree, the dog would have followed her if she'd walked anywhere Mine certainly would have. Unless of course sheeft by the gate near the bench and the dog was not let through. Although I guess there is CCTV on that gate.