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Russia conflict is terrifying me

152 replies

Miracle29 · 24/02/2022 18:49

I've seen another of threads on here and to be honest to scared to look through them. I've got my 2 children off for half term and encouraged them to watch films and play as there is so much on russia. My teenage ds has come to me today dating its all over the news on his phone etc and he's scared and to be honest I am. I won't show that infront of my children but I am. I had a massive fear of war when I was little, no idea where it came from but I was always asking questions about war and if we will die etc. My anxiety on this since boris speech has heightened and I'm so scared now. What do we do if there is war? Will there be a war? I'm just so scared. I know there's alot of people who are scared but please put my mind at ease.

OP posts:
Gowithme · 26/02/2022 11:13

Putin is nearly 70, it wouldn't surprise me if he is going to take a step back soon and he wants to be remembered for this show of strength - he wouldn't want to step back with covid being what he was remembered for. Nothing will get in his way IMO, he will go as far as he needs to get Ukraine, it's just shit for the everyday people of Ukraine just trying to live a happy, normal life.

I don't think he will be interested in starting WW3, he'll want to step back whilst looking like a hero and Ukraine is the place he's chosen to 'save' and bring back into the fold. He knows The West won't really stand in his way over it. Tell your son that it's awful for the Ukranian's but a lot of what politicians say is posturing and nobody wants WW3. Putin is showing his strngth before he steps back IMO and replaces himself with his hand picked successor.

Miracle29 · 26/02/2022 11:19

Your all completely right and nice to know I'm not alone in feeling anxious and uneasy. I've explained a little to ds regarding our army etc and he seems to feel OK about it. He's just asking questions such as where do we go if war came here and things like that I can't really answer. Pitin most certainly has lost the plot and I've not read any news this morning as it all says different things so I'll just read from reliable sources in future. It's just so sad that a child is asking these questions but I am proud of him as he is thinking of the poor children over Ukraine and saying he feels really helpless that they are in this situation. This has gotten to everyone, its just so upsetting. I did see the poor children and women leaving their dad's and partners last night on a news channel and turned it off as it was so upsetting.

OP posts:
battenburgHatday · 26/02/2022 11:25

@marieantoinehairnet

Also, his latest speech tells everyone what they need to know, he is a dictatorial mad man
That’s the biggest problem the madness. If he’s genuinely lost it rather than just consciously acting like an arse then we have a bigger problem that first imagined.

The gap between abusing power and being rationally and methodically unreasonable is completely different to someone with that much power experiencing a MH and/or physical (who knows what his health status is) deciding they’ll do something and not caring who they bring down with them or what consequences their actions have.
If he’s not ok then that makes it a lot scarier

prh47bridge · 26/02/2022 11:31

@mynameisnotkate

That means he could move on from Ukraine to invade countries that are now part of NATO. If that happens, either we renege on the NATO treaty or we, along with all other NATO members, have to step in to defend the countries in question.

I think we would renege. There’s no way the US or Western Europe is going to get into a potential nuclear war with Russia because of a treaty.

The US, UK and other NATO nations have already moved troops and assets to strengthen defences along NATO's eastern flank. And I sincerely hope you are wrong (although I suspect you would be right if Trump regains power). If we renege on the NATO treaty, none of us are safe. We would show the world that we are unreliable allies and that we don't believe in the values we proclaim enough to defend them. We would see more nations turn to Russia or China. And, crucially, we would show Putin that he can expand westwards as far as he wants. When would we stop him? Donetsk? Dusseldorf? Dover? Or are we so frightened that he might use nuclear weapons that we would just give up everything?
Igotjelly · 26/02/2022 11:38

It’s strange I was terrified up until they actually invaded. I’m now just angry. Would imagine if it escalated outside of Ukraine’s borders the fear would come back but for now all I am thinking is how fucking DARE he (Putin)

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 26/02/2022 11:41

It's scary cause it is current

No it’s not. This is the scariest one. I never seen the NATO commander on TV like that before. I’ve never seen anyone threatening to unless weaponry like Putin before. Except Nirtj Korea and they don’t really count. I’ve never known planes being banned from airspaces befre

I’ve lived through the Cold War. This is worse

Prescottdanni123 · 26/02/2022 11:42

Headlines are designed to scare people. If you don't want to read the news, don't look at all.

Televised news is probably better. So far, the reporters have been good at breaking down and explaining what is happening.

Prescottdanni123 · 26/02/2022 11:46

@mynameisnotkate

That means he could move on from Ukraine to invade countries that are now part of NATO. If that happens, either we renege on the NATO treaty or we, along with all other NATO members, have to step in to defend the countries in question.

I think we would renege. There’s no way the US or Western Europe is going to get into a potential nuclear war with Russia because of a treaty.

@mynameisnotkate

We would not renege. It is not in UK's nature. We may be a small island but we have never let anyone intimidate us. It was this fighting spirit that left Hitler too shit scared to walk in when he had the chance.

tsmainsqueeze · 26/02/2022 11:54

My child is asking too ,we have explained as much and as simple as possible but daily she is asking if there will be a war.
I have 2 older sons ,i cried today when reading about the ukraine men being conscripted , it is beyond belief that this would ever happen again.
I have decided to shield her as much as i can from the news etc , i remember worrying about the threat of 3rd world war when i was a child.
I also care about the loss russian families will have too , i really hope someone around putin is brave enough to assasinate him.
I think it is not an over reaction to be terrified.

MMBaranova · 26/02/2022 12:02

Putin is nearly 70, it wouldn't surprise me if he is going to take a step back soon and he wants to be remembered for this show of strength - he wouldn't want to step back with covid being what he was remembered for.

I used to think he could retire, when the Putin-Medvedev double act was at its peak 10 or so years ago. They were the boys and took manly holidays together. P was the Alpha, but M seemed to be more than just a temporary titular substitute and sidekick. Now I don't think he can. He'll just grow old and less rational. Why? There's no clear successor he seems to trust and his grasp of reality / extreme narcissism just seems to take him further from rationality.

On the spinning out of control: Dr Charles Tannock is a retired NHS consultant and former Tory MEP. Within the last hour he tweeted 'I spoke to a former EU member state President & EU MS senior Diplomat in Russia who were both convinced it was all bluff and he'd never actually invade Ukraine. I was pessimistic as I know as a Psychiatrist how paranoia is a major risk factor of danger of causing harm to others' - @CharlesTannock

I do think Putin wants to be remembered for this. In his mind (and in his recent warped historical rant he seemed genuine in his belief) he is putting back together something that should not be separated.

RedToothBrush · 26/02/2022 12:19

By all accounts, the news today suggests all is not going to plan...

First of all Putin clearly expected that the Russians would take Ukraine easily and quickly. It was being reported before it even started that soliders stationed in Belarus were not being properly supplied with food, and were having to buy their own. Many didn't have any money either, so either were relying on other soliders helping them out, or locals helping them.

This seems to be holding out, with troops 'running out of fuel' (maybe real or a good way to avoid the front line) and looting/asking for food from Ukrainians.

There's a video doing the rounds on twitter;
twitter.com/aliostad/status/1497519061554630658
In it there is an exchange between the russians and a ukrainian. The Russians state they don't know where they are going and they ask for news on how the war is going - they don't seem to be particularly motivated to say the least.

news.yahoo.com/russia-used-beatings-tricks-forcibly-191116730.html
Russia Used Beatings and Tricks to Forcibly Send Rookie Troops to Ukraine, Rights Group Says

Russian soldiers from all across the country were deceived into heading to the Ukrainian border, and some were beaten if they resisted, according to the Committee of Soldiers’ Mothers, a Russian non-governmental organization that works to expose human rights violations within the military.

The group is reportedly preparing a complaint for the Chief Military Prosecutor’s Office alleging that their sons only recently joined the military as conscripts and were told they were going to the border with Ukraine for drills. But their statuses were then abruptly changed to contract soldiers— a role for those with more combat and training experience—and they were suddenly thrust into war.

“They are switching entire regiments to contract [soldiers,] although the guys did not submit any formal requests for this, and took no such initiative. There are instances of physical violence, and beatings of those who refuse to become contract soldiers. And after that it’s completely unknown [what happens to them], because they take away their phones,” Andrei Kurochkin, the deputy chairman of the group, told Takie Dela.

“We've had a flurry of calls from scared mothers all over Russia. They are crying, they don’t know if their children are alive or healthy,” he was quoted saying, adding that it’s a “complete catastrophe” when military service is performed “under duress.”

Again, I get a sense of this lack of conviction and basic supplies combined with the idea that Russia has sustained more casualties than expected is hitting moral hard. And its being taken seriously by Ukraine as a weakness because they've decided to do this:

Euromaidan Press @EuromaidanPress
This evening, Ukraine will open a hotline for mothers, fathers, wives of the Russian occupiers who came to Ukraine with weapons but were captured or killed. The line will be called "Come back alive from Ukraine!" - Adviser to Internal Ministry reported

Which is bloody excellent propaganda.

Meanwhile the Ukrainian President is leading by example inspiring his fellow citizens and should he now die, is effectively going to be a martyr. Which, isn't a particular great scenario for Putin. The Ukrainans have a clear cause and reason to fight.

This does mean Putin is probably likely to throw the kitchen sink at things and it will get even uglier with human rights violations and citizens suffering because he's on the back foot and Russians start to ask more and more questions.

Mikhail Matveyev (CPRF) and Oleg Smolin (CPRF) are members of the State Duma and have now stated they oppose whats happening. They believe they had voted to recognise the independence of the Eastern territories (Donesk, Lugansk), not for a military invasion of Ukraine. Matveyev has said explicitly he voted for peace not war and there is a sense of being mislead. Seeing Kyiv being bombed isn't going down terribly well (which also suggests that there is a crumbling in the facade of the pretext of the war too).

If the Ukranians do manage to hold the line, then Putin's going to start having a domestic problem - as he looks weak. Indeed, its being reported by Al Jazeera (significant that its not an American or European news agency) that Putin is pretty pissed that the plan it is not going to plan and is too slow.

China abstained on the UN vote but has since said that it recognises Ukraines soverignty and one of Russia's closest allies Kazakhstan has reported refused as request for troops to help support Russia.

So its not exactly looking like a walk in the park or as if Putin would have the military ability or manpower to do a ground assault further West. He is trying to maintain the strong man pose with lots of hot air, and may well yet succeed in taking Kyiv and the rest of Ukraine, but he's going to face issues controlling the situation there from hostile locals and he still could lose a lot of credibility domestically, with the war being perceived as a failure in other ways.

The American experience has very much been the case that wars have been lost on the domestic front due to the body bags and loss of moral cause. The Soviets got bogged down in Afghanistan with a guerilla war.

Putin is in danger of cocking it up, even if he wins in Ukraine, if he's not careful and may have over played his hand. (But dictator backed into a corner, is also not a good scenario either).

He's now holding a chalice thats poisoned.

Fortyminutes · 26/02/2022 12:20

I’m normally a big worrier but aside from feeling desperately sad for the Ukrainian people this isn’t bothering me.
We will either keep out of it (by far the most likely option) or we won’t. If we don’t there’s absolutely nothing we can do personally about the outcome. It will be over very quickly.
Just focus on normal life.

Olden · 26/02/2022 12:27

@Fortyminutes

I’m normally a big worrier but aside from feeling desperately sad for the Ukrainian people this isn’t bothering me. We will either keep out of it (by far the most likely option) or we won’t. If we don’t there’s absolutely nothing we can do personally about the outcome. It will be over very quickly. Just focus on normal life.
Yeah it's really easy to "just get on with normal life" while potential option b hangs over us!
Itsnotover · 26/02/2022 12:29

Can people please stop posting thread after thread after thread like this. Please?

It is not helping anyone least of all you. Panicking won’t help. Mumsnet is the worst forum ever for ghouls and doom mongers. Sorry but it is.

The world is dangerous yes, but there will be much more to all this than we even know about.

There are A LOT of people on MN at the moment stirring up worry posting as if they have the first idea about foreign affairs. Most of us don’t!

One thing you can hold onto though is that Putin has nowhere near the amount of support that Hitler did.

Perpop · 26/02/2022 12:29

@RedToothBrush an interesting update. Thank you

Itsnotover · 26/02/2022 12:33

@Miracle29 I was just going to say your son is probably too young to have been aware of any previous war like this. So it’s understandable that he’d be worried.

I stopped watching all the news about Covid because it made me anxious.

DottyHarmer · 26/02/2022 12:38

Thank you @RedToothBrush for your as usual excellent post.

To sum up: Putin does not have the manpower to invade further West. If you look at a map (or rather a globe) you can see how an invasion could in theory happen, but that reckons without any resistance from NATO, the country itself, and indeed the Russian soldiers.

RedPandaABC · 26/02/2022 12:39

@RedToothBrush, What are the chances that Putin will lose the plot and use chemical/biological or nuclear warfare in Ukraine? @Itsnotover, Are you really telling grown ups to not talk about something they chose to talk about? If you don't want to see the threads, could you hide them or stay off MN for a bit? Not to be sarcastic but Netmums might be less buys with this type of talk.

DottyHarmer · 26/02/2022 12:42

I agree this is a ghoul magnet. But at least I haven’t seen the appalling virtue signalling elsewhere on the internet. And celebrities. My god - who cares what Holly Willoughby’s opinion is. My local council got in on the act saying they had a motion to stand with Ukraine - as if that’s some outlying pious position instead of what the entire world thinks. I’m sure Putin will rethink his whole strategy after reading that Craptown in the UK disagrees with him…..

Itsnotover · 26/02/2022 12:44

@RedToothBrush - the amount of threads with people saying this same thing is ridiculous. There is no need for the sheer number of threads saying the same thing.

Most people on MN are not military experts. Or foreign affairs experts. A lot of people talking nonsense and passing it off as fact.

ItsAlwaysThere · 26/02/2022 12:44

I am a news reader, watcher and listener. But right now I am not.

I do however, like to watch Victoria Derbyshire on tiktok who is giving concise, clear information in small chunks.

Mischance · 26/02/2022 12:50

The only hope is that someone will trip him up at the top of the stairs. Sorry to sound flippant, but truly he is a complete megalomaniac nut job. It is he and his like who cause wars, and we have no way of getting rid of them.

He does have a cabal of people around him with the same aim of getting the old USSR back - but surely to god they cannot all be mad too.

I am hoping the the Russian-in-the-street, the family men and women who just want to live in peace will somehow move to the fore if Putin was out of the picture. We can only hope that some of these people are in the armed forces.

RedToothBrush · 26/02/2022 12:53

Its being pointed out that Putin has broken quite a few of SunTzu's rules of war.

Fortyminutes · 26/02/2022 12:56

‘ Yeah it's really easy to "just get on with normal life" while potential option b hangs over us!’
What else can you do though? Does no one any favours to panic about something you have zero control over.

RedToothBrush · 26/02/2022 12:56

[quote Itsnotover]@RedToothBrush - the amount of threads with people saying this same thing is ridiculous. There is no need for the sheer number of threads saying the same thing.

Most people on MN are not military experts. Or foreign affairs experts. A lot of people talking nonsense and passing it off as fact.[/quote]
Arsed.

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