Tragic case of stressed mother leaving her child alone in car

[GiantSquirrelSpotter]

www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/worldnews.html?in_article_id=458063&in_page_id=1811

This is a dreadful case, but what I found quite heartening, is that the Belgian child protection authorities have not immediately bayed for the mother's blood; they've responded with compassion, not condemnation, acknowledging that tragic mistakes happen and forgetfulness does not equal lack of love.

I just wish the English could learn a bit about compassion in cases like this.

Oh god that poor woman

I have nearly left my child at a friend's before (she was normally at preschool, it was an inset day and she was off playing quietly upstairs). Unreminded I could easily have gone home and poddled on until time to collect her.

One day merges into the next and if you always drop them off why would you stop and think "did I do it?" and go check - you would just carry on as normal knowing you wouldn't forget your child. But with enough stress you can.

How would you be able to carry on living every day of your life knowing you did that?

I keep crying thinking about that poor woman.

I'm not sure there is any mother, if they are really honest, who doesn't have a 'near miss' at some point in the first 5 years of their childs life.

One Friday afternoon I went shopping, and left my new and very expensive pushchair (no baby in it!) in the shopping centre car park. I didn't realise untill Monday morning what I'd done. With hind sight I put it down to pnd and stress.

Any stressed out parent could have done this - she deserves nothing but sympathy

This has happened again, this time in Holland, yesterday. An 11 month old baby left in the car was found dead from dehydration. His mother had forgotton to drop him off at his creche because she had an urgent meeting at the school where she works as a teacher. The creche itself was only up the road from the school and she had simply driven past it forgetting to drop off her baby.

The mother was questioned by police, but it was obviously an accident and she is now being helped by victim support.

The lessons at the school are continuing.

Here is the link, can only find it in dutch:
www.vrtnieuws.net/cm/vrtnieuws.net/nieuws/buitenland/070531Babyoverlijdt

Twice in one week

these two cases are horrific. like mamazon and kerrymum though, I dont understand how it can have happened. And Im speaking as a wohm of 4, who has used nurseries in the past.

i'm going back to the lovely shepards pie thread...byeee

OMG< how weird is that, for it to happen twice in such close time frame.
The poor Families and those poor little Babies!
Not gonna get into that whole...but how...thing....because it is obviously easier done then anyone would imagine.

my God two in the one week how

Good God, those are such tragic stories. Poor women.

England and France are very close to each other, too, less than 26 miles at the nearest point IIRC. Yet I'm sure there are child deaths in France that we don't hear about.

No point blaming the poor women, they are presumably suffering enough without anyone else adding to it.

I wonder where the hell the cars were parked, though, that no passers-by noticed the poor babies.

~Without judging anyone (honestly),what could possibly be done to avoid this? Should we all check cars empty every time we leave, like we check they are locked on autopilot? ~

I was thinking about this last week when I read about the first case...poor baby

The technology does already exist if the car people wanted to do this. Place sensor pad under the child car seat cover which can detect if the seat is occupied i.e. the weight/movement of the child and link it to the car system...You know the bit which sounds if you open the door and the lights are left on. So you would be on notice that a child is in the car, every time you left the car.

Or it could be set to sound the alarm if the sensors detect a child weight/movement in the seat, when the alarm is set, so passerbys would notice.

Maybe someone out there will create just a system.

When I was spaced out with a newborn earlier this year, I came home from a walk, took the baby out of the car, but forgot about the dog - left in the car for three and a half hours, thank God it was winter so no harm done.

The poor, poor woman. Her life will be a torment from now on, I'm sure - it doesn't bear thinking about. I just hope she does get some really good help.

There always have been and always will be stories of adults who forget children in various places, usually thank goodness with no tragic outcome...

I just feel for this woman, three children and a job and trying to do her best in every situation...it makes me think that it was easier for mums when the job was not also in the equation...it's another stress. Not trying to talk about WOHM/SAHM stuff here, just that I do feel for women nowadays who have to live life at a permanent rushed and stressed pace (I'm one of them)...I often feel how difficult it is to get your head from all the mum stuff in the morning to the work stuff. Your head can't be in two places at once. It's so hard. And this is a sign of that I think.

Both these mothers were working. I have heard that divorces are higher amongst couples where the wife goes back to work full time in the first year of their childs life. Are working mothers under more of a strain, but don't openly admit it?

poor little baby,

hope the mother gets the help that she needs. terrible situation. such a pity she must have felt she had to carry on with the pressures that must have been there for some time / or no-one to see them for her and offer her help.

sign of the times?

so eternally grateful to my DH for allowing me to be a SAHM because that is tough enough