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Tragic case of stressed mother leaving her child alone in car

271 replies

GiantSquirrelSpotter · 29/05/2007 09:05

www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/worldnews.html?in_article_id=458063&in_page_id=1811

This is a dreadful case, but what I found quite heartening, is that the Belgian child protection authorities have not immediately bayed for the mother's blood; they've responded with compassion, not condemnation, acknowledging that tragic mistakes happen and forgetfulness does not equal lack of love.

I just wish the English could learn a bit about compassion in cases like this.

OP posts:
mumoftwoangels · 29/05/2007 17:50

Have you ever got in your car after it has been parked in the sun and thought it was hot?

Thats how it happened.

3andnomore · 29/05/2007 17:51

Otter, apparently it was very hot and in a car the heat builds up even more (ovenlike) and Baby's obviously can't cope with high temps, etc...aswell anwyay....Kerrymum did actually put a link up earlier ( By KerryMum on Tue 29-May-07 11:49:41 ) and the first link explained the car issue.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 29/05/2007 17:51

Kerry - I suspect it is because you are being wilfully obtuse.

You are saying you cant see how she did it - well she did it was a momentary oversight that had catastrophic and very tragic results. Have you ever walked half way home in a day dream and not remembered crossing the road, but know you did? Have you ever put washing, powder etc in the machine - but not started it and walked off? When did you worry about the washing - when you expected that it had finished - most likely.

The only other alternative is that she did it on purpose - she left her child in a hot car all day and neglected to feed or attend to it.

Which is more likely? The former, obviously - which is why it is so wilfully obtuse about you saying you cant see how it happened. It Did Happen. Therefore you dont need to understand it. Just feel a bit of compassion for the Mother, the family and of course the baby.

MellowMa · 29/05/2007 18:02

Message withdrawn

akaJamiesMum · 29/05/2007 18:03

Poor woman and poor baby - how shocking and sad. Not getting involved in the ins and outs and hows and whys - it happened and it's sad.

AbRoller · 29/05/2007 18:05

what JamiesMum said

DumbledoresGirl · 29/05/2007 19:02

FWIW, I am with you Kerrymum.

Otter · 29/05/2007 20:05

poor poor woman

Pan · 29/05/2007 20:25

God. Hideously sad. For some reason I can't view the page, only the title banner, but am getting the message of what happened. Poor everyone concerned.

Peeps who say they "would never do that" are misguided and a tad pointy-fingered??

So so sad.

PinkTulips · 29/05/2007 20:31

it's not just women who can empathise either, just told dp and he almost cried and said 'poor woman, she'll have to live with that her whole life. it could happen so easily' and he's by no means your sensitive new age male.

Pan · 29/05/2007 20:33

PT - man just posted before you!!

TwoIfBySea · 29/05/2007 20:35

Oh that poor woman what she must be going through. I suppose I may be pulled up as I was critical of another neglectful mother recently but this isn't neglect, this is just some poor mother with too much to do, oh who hasn't been stressed to the limits, and now she is paying the ultimate price. I hope she is getting a lot of help to cope through this.

Hopefully this will shed the light on how many women are left to deal with everything. I have a feeling, had I not chosen to be a SAHM I would have been stressed to the max too.

I admire the quote from the police, the understanding she is receiving, how different it would be here.

PinkTulips · 29/05/2007 20:46

lol pan... saw you after i posted!

you must admit though as an MNing man you probably fall into the sensitive new age category... as opposed to dp who calls MN 'your bunch of computer lesbians'

Pan · 29/05/2007 20:48

"you probably fall into the sensitive new age category..." >

3andnomore · 29/05/2007 20:48

Hm...wondering now what I am doing wrong...cos I am a SAHM and am still often rather stressed out...what is yer secret, two?

3andnomore · 29/05/2007 20:49

....Computer Lesbians...hm

PinkTulips · 29/05/2007 20:51

two, i'd kinda like to know too as i'm a SAHM and i'm permanently in a tizz!

belgo · 29/05/2007 20:55

Otter - further down the thread I posted that it was a particularly hot day in Belgium that day.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 29/05/2007 21:18

LOL at Pan being new age

He is gay, either....shocker!

VeniVidiVickiQV · 29/05/2007 21:19

isn't gay

ISN'T

whoops sorry.

PinkTulips · 29/05/2007 21:55

roffling at that VVV

VeniVidiVickiQV · 29/05/2007 22:12

I'm not one for typos, but when I make one, i really do make one......

PeckaRolloverAgain · 29/05/2007 22:21

I have had a couple of close shaves when very, very tired or stressed.

I was up for 3 days straight recently and physically couldnt keep my eyes open, I get drifting off and suddenly darting awake - one of these times I dashed into kitchen and DS (3.5) was up on the kitchen bench and had just put a bowl with a metal spoon (his rice pudding he had let go cold) in the microwave I was lucky that I woke up in time or he could have been electrocuted/caused a fire.

If that had happened I would have been judged for lazily dozing on the sofa whilst letting my children wander free to mess with electrical equipment.

I will now make sure Im not in the position again, as now realise I cant function on that little sleep (I am a doula and had been at a very long birth).

Thank god I could make arrangements to avoid it happening again without any tragic consequences.

This poor woman, if only she had noticed sooner I am sure she would have had a shock and maybe organised some help, time off work, extra rest, blah blah blah

Im just so sorry for her that she just has to live with the consequences.

It is unbearable to think what she must be going through.

3andnomore · 30/05/2007 11:24

phew PinkTulips....glad to know I am not the only one...was starting to wonder here....!
Pecka, OMG, but it's so easy to have those close almost accidents...the otehr day I went into the Kitchen, had the cooker on as doing Dinner, had just gone out for a moment...when I come back in I can smell somehting burnign (no, not my dinner) and couldn't work out what it was...well, next moment I hear a lil noise, my middleson (4 1/2y)hiding behind the Kitchen counter, so, I knew something was up...well...went looking what he was up too and he was holding some rolled up paper, burned on the edges....
nothing happened...thank god, but that one could have so gone wrong badly...all those what ifs....of course now I know that I can't leave the Kitchen at all, even if I think the Boys are watching TV or are playing upstairs.
I have 3 Kids, and this was the first time ever that this has happened...my Kids have never gone near the cooker or things like that....there is always a first for everything.

donnie · 30/05/2007 16:49

how awful for all concerned. That poor woman, the poor child.

It's pointless , though, to state categorically " I would NEVER do that" because nobody, except those with unique ability to see into the future, can rationally or truthfully say that. What you mean is : " I would never PURPOSELY do that". But since that poor woman clearly didn't do it on purpose either, why bother making such a non-point? it smacks of arrogance and also one-upmanship IMO, which , given the tragic context, is a pretty damn low shot.