Charlotte Wyatt to go into foster care

[ginmummy]

...because, according to the news, her seperated parents can't give her the care that she needs. It so sad, I want to cry. Poor, poor Charlotte, poor, poor parents.

Kitty, I don't know. I have absolutely no idea what the Wyatts are like or what their decision making processes were, so I won't be making confident assertions or snap black and white judgements about this case. The only thing I can confidently state is that what they went and are going through was and is probably horrendous and so I won't be condemning them for having had the cheek to want their baby to stay alive, when they should have been making rational cost-effective decisions.

"Making it possible for a child to live can't be considered alongside how much it will cost for the state to look after her! What are you saying? "
Socci WHAT on earth are you on about? Are you hallucinating things I'm saying now?
To put it simply, I think you have confused that with someone else's post, not mine. I would very much appreciate it if you would be more carefull before you attack that you have got your facts right, thankyou.

to the posters who see red over the cost of live/die desicions , i for one don't begrudge this little girl or any other sn family the money - i hting Kitty and i have been misunderstood , wwhat i am trying to say is that given all the efforts, time and resources poured into this family maybe , just maybe , they should now be expected to step and take some responsibility for hteir actions, lets face it loads of others do however hard it is.

i am deeply saddened by some of the posts here. i have found some of the remarks so offensive i have become angry. i dont thin i have become aggrressive or made any personal attacks, if i have then i apologise.

everyone is entitled to their own opinion, and this being a public forum you are free to express it here.
but in the same light you must also understand that if that opinion is in stark contrast to the vast majority then you will feel a little attacked. but please remember it is not you that is being challenged it is your view.

we do not need another MN flounce

Message withdrawn

'Alot od public money has been ploughed into this whole debacle, not good at all.'

'There is only so much ,money in the pot. I am in no position to say how it should be spent, but I can say when I think that bad decisions have been made and I think they were made in this case.'

I'm sorry Kitty but your original statement was so incredibly judgemental when not fully appraised of all the facts.
Perhaps you should be more careful before you attack?

Your original post:
"I cannot imagine what it must be like to have a child in that situation and to be a parent in that position, but now, to expect the state to pick up the pieces is pretty sh**ty behaviour. I'm sorry but I think it's wrong . Resisitate their child against all medical advice child and then get someone to look after her?
They should be made to deal with the consequences of their actions. They fought to keep her alive and now they must care for her."

Becky, I don't like to get emotional when I post, it detracts from what I am trying to say and it doesn't help any points I have to make.# I am a very emotional and sensitive person actually (possibly far to sensitive an self disparaging) I am touched by many, many things, but I don't feel about this the way most of you do.

but mummydoc - the father WANTS to care for his daughter but social services have stated that he is unable to.

If i am being cynicle i may declare my sneaking suspicion that this is a tactic in order to reinstat the DNR order. once poor Charlotte is in state care it will be left to the Dr's to decide her fate with no one to battle for her.

perhaps the NHS ought to fund me on a typing course - some real spectacular typos today ...

Message withdrawn

batty, that is a really chilling thought.

BUT charlotte has not had ro be resusictated at all with the DNR is place, has she?

surely that says a lot.

becky, yes, I think a bad decision was made. that doesn't make me a monster.

Message withdrawn

Which particular decision do you think was bad, kitty? I can't follow this thread at all, it's very convoluted.

why do social services think he is not suitable, because of his suicide attempt? , i ifnd it hard ot believe , i see lots of families where aparent has ahd a suicide attempt and social services are no were to be seen, there must be more to it.

Fair enough kitty. But I still think that if you actually tried to imagine yourself in these parent's shoes NOW, not what you would have done differently in the past, but what they're going through NOW, you might express yourself differently.

kitty a bad decision may have been made. I don't know whether I agree with you on that or not, I'm pretty neutral on it tbh. Perhaps the decision was bad, but sometimes a bad decision is the only possible one to make in life.

Your tone says a lot more than that. It speaks volumes about blaming parents for their own misfortunes. You say you like to keep emotion out of your posts, but you haven't done - your posts are coming across as heartless and angry with the Wyatts. That's quite emotional.

Am appalled that the cost of life/NHS care is even mentioned, heaven knows how much our dd has cost the NHS, nor have I ever even thought about it tbh.
I think the parents split because of the pressures of having a child with such a debilitating condition are infinite.
Especialy for people who may not have the family support or ability to care for such a child on their own. I think offering Charlotte up for fostering is honest and for the good of their daughter
look against the odds and doctors expectations she has made it to her 3rd birthday and is well enough to leave hospital and experience some life outside a childrens ward. it is a shame that it will be in the bosom of her family but any person taking on Charlotte will offer her more than a hospital can.
Having a child that dependent impacts your life beyond belief. Sleep/meds/equipment changes/health scares, anxiety. Leaving you unable to work and possibly affecting your care of your other children.
I mean if it was that easy and morally indefensible we'd all be looking after our elderly and infirm parents ourselves.
It is ok to ask for help.

shame that it will not be in the bosom of her family

What are the long-term prospects for Charlotte if she survives, do we know? Will she be disabled?

Message withdrawn

as i have said before we do not know why ss have made that decision but the father does have criminal record and does not see (by his own choise) his first 3 children. these are facts in the public domain who know what else there is we dont know

I am truely horrified by the views expressed by Kitty and her supporters. Isn´t there a saying that we should judge a society by the way it treats its most vulnerable members - and to me this includes Charlotte AND her parents - whom I would never judge on information given in the media and are without a doubt in genuine need of assistance...

Kitty et al, do u think that people like Charlotte´s parents should not be allowed to have children? Should we allow people that hold EXTREME views to have children when they may perpetuate a shocking outlook on life?