Three children found dead

[RedandChecker]

m.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-27122410

Very, very sad

[maudpringles]

My very good friend had a baby with s.m.a.
Utterly heartbreaking watching them fade away.
No judging here.

[TerrifiedMothertobe]

No wods can describe how sad this is, feel so desperately sad for everyone.

[Blackmouse]

my heart goes out to them all
esp the mother
so sad

[MmeMorrible]

I can't believe some of you are judging this poor woman.

Unless you've watched a sick child die you have no idea what she was dealing with and how desperate she felt. My DN died slowly and painfully of cancer aged 8. It was sheer hell for the whole family. Now multiply that by three. Unimaginably awful.

[Faver0lles]

My neighbour has a 4 year old with SMA. The impact on the family's life is huge.
The little girl is gorgeous, bright, happy, and healthy (for now and hopefully a long time to come), but how someone would cope physically and mentally with three dc with the same condition is beyond me.
The poor, poor family.

[Pigginnora]

I feel deeply sorry for every member of this family.
Absolutely tragic.

I have 2 ds with SNS. With ds1 & suffered hideous dark & all consuming depression. I planned my suicide but something stopped me...

There for the grace of God I go.

[5madthings]

Utterly tragic for the family, poor woman and poor children :(

I hope the courts who deal with this case have compassion.

[AliceDoesntLiveHereAnymore]

So sad.

I would like to think that this would highlight the need for more family and carer support in situations where a family member, especially a child, is disabled and/or has a life limiting condition. Too many families are left to cope with things on their own or are not aware of what little help is available to them. Perhaps some of these tragedies could be avoided if the support was there.

[BigcatLittlecat]

I have nothing but sympathy for the whole family, my heart aches for them.
For the mother it would have been the ultimate gift of love to take their pain away. We have no idea what happened but no-one else walks in anyones shoes.
It's there for the grace of god for all of us.

[nethunsreject]

Heartbreaking . No judgement here, must have been utter hell. I hope the mum and dad and sister manage to find peace one day,

[Handsup]

So upsetting to read. I only hope the law is not tough and finds compassion for the mother. Mentally she'll be serving her own life sentence

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

My heart does go out to this woman - I cannot imagine how hellish it must have been to watch your children dying by millimetres every single day, knowing there was nothing you could do to improve their condition.

I do think some anger is appropriate, though - but not at her, never at a mum who has had to cope with something most of us cannot even imagine - but anger if the system left her to cope alone, or nearly alone. Anger that there was no-one she felt able to reach out to, from the pit of despair.

[UnderthePalms]

How sad. What a cruel illness the children suffered from. My grandpa used to live in New Malden. Poor family.

[NigellasDealer]

that poor poor woman

[murphys]

Very tragic.

The dad and eldest daughter were on holiday in SA. Not that it matters, but his family are quite well known as they own a popular hotel conference centre near where I live. It has been widely reported on here due to this. She must have been under some amount of pressure with her dh being away and she at home with the three children.

My heart breaks for them.

[Blackmouse]

how do you mean remember riven?

i hope nothing bads happened to her

last i remember was riven champhaning sp
about the amouunt if nappies child with special needs are allowed a day
four iirc

[Thurlow]

Such terrible, sad news, so devastating for all the family and their friends.

So far I haven't seen much judgement out there, which is good. I can't even imagine the limits this family has been pushed to with three very ill children. If anything at all can come out of such a terrible tragedy, it will perhaps be that more support might be needed for families like them, if that was a factor in this tragedy.

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

I suspect rainbowqueen is referring to the time when Riven became so desperate, because of the lack of support she was getting to care for her dd, that she seriously considered putting her in care. She started a thread on here about it, and it blew up into an national story, iirc.

She didn't put her dd in care, in the end, but even thinking about it was an expression of how close to the end of her tether she was.

[AvonCallingBarksdale]

Blackmouse, Riven went to the press saying that she was asking for her DD to be taken into care as she could no longer cope with the demands of looking after a severley disabled DC with little or no help. I think she was highlighting how desperate the situation is for so many families. As far as I'm aware nothing bad's happened to her.

This story is heartbreaking.

[SouthernComforts]

Absolutely tragic.

My dd has been extremely ill, to the point where I've sat in intensive care trying to keep her alive through sheer willpower, just for one more day.

I still have no idea what life must be like knowing your child will die, not tomorrow, but soon, and having to carry on regardless.

I don't think I would have been able to. Not only one child, but three.

My heart breaks for all of them.

[SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius]

Avon - I think Riven posted here, and it was other MNers who, outraged on her behalf, took the story to the press.

[Swannery]

We don't know the details, but can anyone envisage that the mother made the right decision? That what she did was not just done out of desperation, but was in the best interests of those children? That people, whether adult or child, should not be forced to live on until nature takes its course, irrespective of how terribly they are suffering?
An adult in those circumstances might choose to take their own life, but a young child doesn't have that choice. I am not convinced that she did the wrong thing.
I would also guess that the parents feel guilty, as they had not one, but three children with the same genetic life-limiting illness. At least after the first one, they took a conscious risk in having more children. That must have been very hard to live with. Perhaps the mother feels that she has made a self sacrifice (eg years in prison) to bring her children an easier end.
I appreciate that this is speculative.
I think that Holland (or was it Denmark) has just made euthanasia legal in the case of terminally ill children (in addition to adults)? I can see the sense in this, if very carefully regulated.